Adieu
By Samurai-Nashie
Disclaimer: I don't own Kingdom Hearts – I rent. (If you understood that, you rock).
Summary: He never thought that saying goodbye to a former enemy would be so hard…but Sora wasn't sure what he felt about it anymore.
oOo
And if I never knew you, I'd have lived my whole life through empty as the sky, never knowing why, lost forever...if I never knew you…
oOo
Sora wanted to laugh.
It was totally stupid – Axel was supposed to be his enemy, right? He had kidnapped Kairi, and provided him an endless headache of trying to decide whose side the fire-wielding Nobody was really on. And…more importantly, he was part of the Organization. And the Organization was bad – what they were doing was bad.
So, why?
"I think I liked it better when they were on my side," came the voice from behind him.
Something inside him stirred – he didn't know what it could be. Adrenaline, maybe? And this strange feeling of faint déjà vu whenever he was around the Organization's eighth member?
Sora smirked, turning his head slightly, still holding his defensive posture. "Feeling a little regret?"
And this banter…it almost feels as I could be arguing with Riku…
A twinge of pain this time, but he ignored it as Axel snickered.
"Nah, I can handle these punks. Watch this."
The Nobodies moved with the lightning speed of born predators. But Sora knew…he wasn't sure how he knew, but he knew…he felt Axel move quickly in an attack, and felt himself launch forward, Oathkeeper spinning in a chaotic dance of destruction…
(…and Oblivion, held solid in his other hand, and he was sure that this felt familiar somehow, and the person behind him was not an enemy no had never been an enemy so why…?)
The fires that swept across the landscape that could never be surprised him. The dancing flames sped past, but never harmed (no the fire had never burned him no matter how intense the battle no matter how high the flames grew and still…). Surprised, he lowered his keyblade as the Nobodies flailed in agony and shuddered, the red and gold flames twisting like rope around their necks and pulling hard.
And in the bright light that followed…even Sora wasn't aware of the small smirk that appeared on his face (because this was familiar because he always wanted to show-off but it was never like this…never this powerful…what in the world had he…?)
The brown-haired boy lowered his arms – the light had been near blinding – and saw that the Nobodies were gone, their twisted dancer forms burned to invisible ashes. Closer, he saw his comrades looking around in surprise, their weapons gone and vanished – had it really been that simple?
"Woah."
(No…no…what have you done…)
Sora was pretty sure that he hadn't done anything that could take out all the Nobodies, but…he looked around. And there was nothing there. Except…
He turned.
(And this isn't familiar at all and why why why why…)
Sora had seen this before. It hadn't been that long ago, even though it felt like months and months. But he remembered them, the blonde with the easy smile that was no smile, and the man with the cold eyes that were unlit by a rose's glow. He had seen this, but he had never felt…
He shook his head to clear his thoughts, and then ran over to fallen warrior.
"You're…fading away…" he murmured, watching as the small tendrils of darkness, with the same wispiness as the flames but without their warmth, rose quietly towards the nonexistent sky.
(But…but this isn't right it shouldn't be like this…you…)
Axel laughed softly, his ever familiar grin spreading across his face, though it lacked the teasing, all-knowing spark that it once had. "Well, that's what happens when you put your whole being into an attack. You know what I mean?" He paused. "Not that Nobodies actually have beings…right?"
Sora hesitated. He had the feeling, from the way Axel didn't quite meet his eyes, and from the way his voice drifted off into a not-quite-bitter laugh, that he wasn't talking directly to him. But…he was the only one there, and…that something inside him stirred again, stronger this time.
"Anyway, I digress. Go, find Kairi." Axel turned his head to look at Sora, green eyes suddenly filled with a seriousness that the keyblade master had never seen before. "Oh, and almost forgot…sorry for what I did to her."
Kairi…she has to be safe…but why, why would you do this Axel? We were your enemies…we were trying to stop the Organization…why? And why are you telling me this…it's not like you're…after everything you've done for us…you're not going to…
"When we find her, you can tell her that yourself," Sora scolded half-heartedly, even though he knew…he knew…he had seen those wisps of darkness before…right before the musician had fallen back in shock as the one thing that may have brought him something resembling an emotion vanished from his hands, and right before the lancer stumbled backwards into shadows he had tried to plant but which were destroyed in the presence of a glowing promise…
He knew what that meant.
"Think I'll pass. My heart just wouldn't be in it, you know? Haven't got one." Another laugh, but quieter, almost to himself, as if he knew something Sora could never understand, a joke between old friends, a shared secret…
(You're not going to…you promised…
Sora met Axel's eyes and kept the gaze, his face softening from stricken denial to a sort of resigned sadness. "Axel…what were you trying to do?"
"I wanted to see Roxas."
Roxas…
It was that name again. That name that was used to confuse him, taunt him…but when Axel said it, there was no malice in his voice. Just…a strong fondness…and in that fondness, something that Sora remembered, something that he held closer to his heart than anything…
Kairi…Riku…
If the name bothered Sora, Axel gave no sign of noticing. "He…was the only one I liked…" Then, almost wistfully, "He made me feel…like I had a heart…"
And he remembered the way they had looked at him, with nothing akin to emotion in their eyes, but a desire that burned deep in the empty cavities of their chests…and…oh, no…oh, Axel…
Sora closed his eyes, trying to block out the growing tightness in his chest.
"It's kind of funny…you make me feel…the same…" Axel teased, but he trailed off, as if he couldn't actually complete the thought. Sora opened his eyes again and saw the redhead looking at him with that same look of unexplainable affection, for the person that Sora didn't know, and wondered if he would ever know…how such a person could make such a difference in the lives of so many people…
(He'd never tell you…but…oh, Axel…I'm sorry…I'm sorry…)
Axel raised his hand slightly in the opposite direction, and just as swiftly and mysterious as always, a dark portal swirled into existence, that led to a place where Sora knew a greater destiny await. "Kairi's in the castle dungeon. Now, go!"
And the faint tendrils of darkness shimmered and faded towards the nothingness from where they came…
"Axel…"
…and he was gone.
And somewhere in his heart, past the sadness of losing a friend, because he was a friend, the part of him that he still didn't know existed shivered, and awoke.
(Not yet, please…not before I say good-bye…not before…)
In that moment, for the first time in a long time, Roxas opened his eyes.
oOo
In a hallway in a nonexistent castle, the small blonde witch, with the echoes of a teasing good-bye still in her head, cried.
oOo
Author's Note (10 May 2007): This is based on the information that it was Axel's disappearance that finally woke Roxas up.
The last scene with Naminé actually refers to fourth volume of the KH2 novel. And since I couldn't think of a title that fit this, I simply choice the French word for good-bye, "Adieu". The song lyric at the beginning is from "If I Never Knew You", performed by Jon Secada.
- Nashie