Do you ever feel like breaking down?
Do you ever feel out of place?
Like somehow you just don't belong
And no one understands you

- Simpple Plan

Abigail looked at herself in the mirror while Jane, her maid, brushed her bronze wavy hair. It was the first day of school after easter again and she was getting nervous. She was already ten but she still dreaded school, she hated everyone there. Not because she was alone, because well, she was way better than all of them together and didn't need their company but because of their stares and annoying behaviour.

"Jane..." She started timidly, not knowing very well how to ask, "Do I really need to go to school?"

"Of course, darling. You know, going to school is very important, you need to learn things." Jane was a young woman, in her early twenties; she had dark brown hair normally brushed back into a bun and soft, warm, blue eyes.

Abigail bit her lip and looked at the floor, "Will Mom and Dad take me this time?" At the lack of response she sighed and looked into Jane's eyes through the mirror. "I really don't care, will you take me?", she said with a tiny smile.

Jane just smiled back and hugged her while kissing the top of her head, "Don't I always?"

Soon they were at the door of the school and Jane was already saying goodbye, but not before making sure she knew she had spaguetti for lunch, that she was warm enough for the cold british air and telling her she would be there at four, when the classes ended.

When Abigail was left alone in front of the gates the only thing she could do was look at the frame of Jane get farer and farer. She wanted to tell her to stay with her and to hug her and kiss her again but she wouldn't do that here, not with so many people who could see her vulnerable side. Abigail was already in Junior school and she knew that she had to be a big girl, that it wouln't be drawing and doing easy things anymore, but what she was dreading the most was the people. The school wasn't bad but the uniform was quite dreadful. Dark brown skirt and beish jumper, it reminded her of autumn: a season she dreaded as it was the beginning of school. She prefered summer where she could pass the time in her swimming pool or going for walks with Jane.

She turned around and stared at the gate of the school: it was tall and menacing and the more she looked at it the more it reminded her of the gate of a haunted mansion or of a castle. She was about to go away running when a boy a bit taller than her but that didn't look much older than her blocked her way.

"Your mother is pretty young, and why do you call her Jane? Aren't you supposed to call her mum?" Abigail was about to tell him to mind his own business and that he shouldn't listen to others' conversations but she thought better about it. She didn't want to make the last term more difficult than it already was.

"She's not my mum. She is... my nanny" She had learned that having a maid wasn't very common and that it could be something people made fun of you because of that.

"Why don't your parents take you? My Mummy says that she would never miss one of my first-days of school as they're very important."

At the mention of her parents she put her chin up and turned her head. "They're working. Now get out of my way, I can't waste my time with simple-minded people." She went off walking through the gates as fast as possible, but not fast enough to miss the huff and the 'idiot' yelled by the boy who she didn't even know the name of.

The rest of the day had gone too slowly for her likings. She had spent every lesson receiving glares or pitiful looks, and all she wanted to do was hit every one of them in the face. She was tired of the looks she recieved since she had started the year so after the looks started again she decided to ignore all of them, except to tell some of them to find something to do with their lives. At the beginning of the year she had been more vocal about her feelings but after the first strange incident she had decided to ignore all of them. It had happened on the second month of school while everyone was bugging her with questions and throwing paper balls at her. She had been irritated by Noelia -a very talkative girl who thought she was always right- who was telling her about the importance of a balanced family life and finally Abigail had snapped and told her to hold her tongue. She hadn't predicted that that would be exactly what would happen. Noelia took her tongue between her fingers and started yelling and crying. When the teacher came and saw Abigail trying to make Noelia loosen her hold on her tongue Abigail had been forced to stay after class for a very exasperating 'Hands To Yourself' talk.

It was already the end of the day and she was waiting outside the main entrance when Julius, the overweight bully of the school, came out and saw her.

"Well, is the orphan waiting for her baby-sitter to pick her up? Or are you waiting for the parents that'll never come?" The rest of Julius' group laughed at his 'funny' comment and Julius smirked triumphally.

"Why don't you go and eat some hamburgers you hideous elephant" She said while looking at her nails nonchalantly.

He turned and glared at her, his plumpy cheeks getting red with fury. He got closer to her and grabbed her by the school jumper.

"What did you call me? You don't mean that, you wouldn't be that stupid," he chuckled and got closer.

Abigail, already fed up after the long day, pushed away his hand and glared at him while saying spitefully "Although I feel honored by your compliment, what I mean by that is that you should do us all a favour and punch yourself in the face. Maybe that way it will be less painful for the rest of us."

Julius' face got even redder and his eyes looked bloodshot. He lifted his fist in her direction and she silently prayed that he would punch his own face. And once again she found herself looking dumbfounded as he hit his face with his fist.

At the sound of his screech two teachers came to the origin of the noise and found a nose-bleeding Julius. Without a stutter all of Julius' friends pointed at Abigail and told the teachers that it had been her. She didn't know what to say as she wasn't sure anymore if it wasn't her fault.

-Dreamsarewhatwemakethem-

"I can't believe you punched someone in the face, Abby. What happened?" Jane asked sending her worried looks while keeping an eye on the road.

"I told you already and I told the teacher too: He hit himself in the face! It's not my fault he's imbecile!"

"Of course. He hit himself, right? Please Abby, don't be ridiculous!" Abby looked at her, exasperated and hurt, as Jane pinched the bridge of her nose.

"You have to believe me. I didn't do it, or at least not consciously. I only told him to do it and it seems that sometimes when I tell someone to do something, they just do it." She looked at her hands which were now fiddling with her skirt. She knew she sounded ridiculous but she didn't know how else to say it. "Don't tell Mother, please."

Jane's expression softened at that and she looked at her warmly again, lowering her voice, "Honey, they already know. She told me to pick you up and to talk to you. I think she's upset you made her look bad." She muttered the last words with a frown as if it hurt her to say them. She then glanced at Abigail again and hold her hands with her free one, squeezing to tell her not to worry. They didn't say anything for the rest of the ride and Abby was torn between being nervous at her mother's anger or happy that she would be able to see her.

Abigail was standing in front of the closed door of the living room. Her mother wanted to talk to her but she wasn't sure it was now. She hated to interrupt her, especially when she was working or with guests, which was most of the time. Abigail took a deep breath and knocked before carefully entering the room.

"Mother, you wanted to see me?" She said in a calm and low voice. Her mother turned around from her place on her chair looking at Abigail with surprise.

"Abigail, you're back. I heard what happened at school and I'm very upset" she then waited to here her daughter's apology before continuing, "you know, I had to apologize to that boy's parents. It was so embarrassing; I can't believe you put your father and me in that situation. We'll talk about your punishment later but for now just go to your room without supper." She then looked at Abigail expecting some kind of sign that she had understood. Abigail just nodded and excused herself politely out of the room. She closed the door and went running to her room as she felt tears prickle in her eyes.

She wasn't irritated like she had been at Jane or at her teacher when they had scolded her but she felt hurt at her mother's unattached words. She hadn't even bothered to ask why her daughter had used violence against another person but was just upset that she had made her look bad.

She threw herself in the bed and felt silent tears fall down her cheeks while she bit her lip, suppressing a sob. She was mad at Julius for being a jerk, at the teacher for never telling off the bully, at Jane for not believing her, at her mother for not caring and at herself for having a stupid 'power' which made her do things that she couldn't explain.

And as she silently cried herself to sleep, Abigail wished to be taken away from her house to a better place. Somewhere with people like her. What she didn't know was that in just a few months she would get a letter which would make her wish come true.