Left to die

It started as any normal day. I woke up late, as always, I quickly got dressed and rushed to my Captain's quarters. He was meditating calmly with Tessai. I smiled gently as my captain, with his soft floppy blonde hair that I loved to caress, opened his soft blue eyes. I raised my eyebrows as he smiled; a tight smile. He looked tired, like he had stayed up all night thinking. He had obviously been thinking a lot.

"Are you okay, Captain?" I inquired, raising my eyebrows. I didn't need to look at him long enough to realize that he was a mess on the inside, I knew my Captain well enough that could look into his eyes and tell how he really felt.

"Yes. Don't worry." He replied too quickly. He sounded desperate, worried almost. He smiled a bright, cheerful smile almost immediately after he said it, as if he was apologizing. What was he apologizing for?

I nodded and smiled, his eyes lit up like a child's. I stifled a giggle. We were always like this: two children giggling, egging each other on. I noticed Tessai nudged him slyly; I frowned slightly. What's going on? Captain's smile faded quickly, it was horrible watching him happy one minute then (slightly) melancholy the next.

"I almost forgot! Guess what?! You're moving to Squad 2!" Captain squealed, his voice sounded excited but there was a hint of sadness. My mouth dropped open slightly, I shut it quickly, and Captain smirked. I looked into his eyes for a moment, in that one quick moment in his eyes, I saw: anger, pain, gloom, a desperate plea. A plea for me to cry out; show an emotion, for me to object.

"Why?" My voice was demanding. My captain looked taken aback. He didn't expect me to be so calm. He expected Reiatsu flaring, harsh words.

"Uhh… Because…." He stuttered, I just raised my eyebrows and nodded. Then flashed stepped away.

I ended up on the edge of the Seretai. I stared blankly into space, tears streaming down my face silently. My mind flashed through memories. Meaningful memories. Our first kiss, the first time, that time under the Sakura tree and all them times we went on missions together. More tears. Why was I crying? Something in the back of my mind was telling me, something was going to happen. Something big. I wiped the tears away. How weak was I? If I'm going to Squad 2, I better toughen up.

I went down to the woods, I knew after a few attempts at things I'd seen some Squad 2 members do, and I was doomed. I failed at flashing stepping; I could on flash step on solid ground. After my millionth attempt, I heard a snigger. I flash stepped behind a tree,

"You have good reflexes; we'll build on that, first,"

The voice was smooth, calm. Sui-feng. I sighed and glared at her.

"What do you want?" I sneered, folding my arms

"You have a Squad 2 attitude."

"Hmph"

She just smirked, I rolled my eyes.

"So are you gonna help me?"

Sui-feng nodded smirking; I groaned inwardly. What have I got myself into?

After several hours of severe, harsh training: We finally stopped. I was out of breath, so was Sui-Feng.

"Brilliant….Stamina….." She puffed between breathing, I nodded grinning.

"I'm gonna head off now." We both nodded and flashed stepped in other directions. I stumbled back to Squad 12 Barracks. I couldn't wipe my grin off my face; our training had been fun, taunts, jeers. Best training I had probably done, with anyone. Ever. I'd have to train with her again sometime. Maybe I'd get 3rd seat!

I laughed at my own thought. There was probably already a good 3rd seat. I hoped to be close to Sui-feng, she'd be a very valuable friend. I smiled to myself. Maybe this wouldn't be so bad.

I strolled back to Squad 12 Barracks, the sun was setting slowly. It was a beautiful sight; purple, pink and orange looked almost perfect together like a jigsaw. Fitting together flawlessly.

I entered Captain's room, he was lying face down on the bed. I bit down on my fist, trying not to laugh;

"I see you're back, my little Kura." Captain mumbled as he sat up and plopped his hat on his head. I rolled my eyes,

"Did you have fun?" Captain raised his eyebrows, he looked slightly concerned but he was always like that whenever anything was about me.

"Yes. I trained with Sui-Feng." I answered his next question as I sat down on a wooden chair.

"Mmhh…"

I couldn't help but laugh. My captain was jealous of me, hanging out with my soon-to-be captain.

"Aww is someone jealous?" I asked him in mock concern; I sat on his lap and leaned close. He scowled then scoffed,

"Of Course not."

"Okay then." I smirked mysteriously as I got off his lap. My Captain's face dropped like a bomb, he shot me a glare; I just gave him an innocent look.

It was always like this, it was one of the best things about our relationship. We could be relaxed with each other as well as being helplessly in love with each other. Though he seemed off today, his expression was cloud and the fact his hat was hiding his eyes didn't help.

"What's up?" I questioned him. He just shook his head, I sighed. I had rarely seen him so upset, so isolated, so out of character. I had seen it once after That One Time That Was Never To Be Mentioned Again. Playtime was over, this was serious.

"Kisuke..." I muttered as I walked over to him. He looked up abruptly; I only ever said his name either during sex or when I was being super serious. Most of the time I called him Captain. I sat next to him and wrapped my arms around him tightly.

"Tell me." I whispered softly, he shook his head like a child who wasn't willing to tell anyone about his secret stash of chocolate and sweets. I sighed and stared at him, worry written all over my face. What was wrong with him? This wasn't the man I fell in love with. It wasn't his fault, we had been through this. It could've happened to anyone. I wanted my Captain back. He suddenly breathed in deeply and whispered as quick as a flash,

"I am leaving I am so sorry little Kura I wish I could tell you why but I can't I am sorry."

I felt like my world had just came crashing down on top of me. My haven. My sanctuary. Our haven. Our sanctuary. I wanted to cry. To just fall to pieces right here. Right now. But how would that solve anything? I gave him a pleading look. So he's leaving. That's why I have to go to Squad 2.

"Why?" I croaked, willing myself not to cry. It was all I could say. All I was thinking about. I turned to look at him but all I could see was an empty space. So he was leaving now. I was going with him. I had to. I loved him. A lot.

I had spent a lengthy time with my Captain so I could trace his Rieatsu easily, yet today he had hidden it. I guess we knew each other to well. He knew I would try and find him. I cringed at how predictable I was; I found a small trace of his Rieatsu and followed it. I ended up by a gathering of trees, near the woods with a hole in front of me, as the reckless person I was, I jumped down it and landed, on my feet, in what was like a cave. It was well lit, I could hear voices. I didn't know who's they were but I knew the words they were saying very well. It was the chant you use to go to the human world. I felt my blood run cold as I recognized the voices. Lady Yoruichi and Kisuke. What was going on? Why were they leaving? I heard a loud grunt then a crash; I scrambled quickly behind a large rock. Tessai.

"Ah so you ready to go?" I heard Yoruichi ask, I could imagine her smiling uneasily. Being in a relationship with Kisuke meant I saw her frequently, also I was his lieutenant. Tessai nodded.

"How did she take it?" I heard Tessai inquire, my stomach twisted. I felt sick. I knew what was coming,

"I told her then left. I didn't want to see her face. I feel terrible." My now-ex Captain, and seemingly ex boyfriend, replied as if it was a casual thing, but I could hear the cracks in his voice. I heard a dull thud; I guessed it was Tessai placing his hand on Captain's shoulder. I didn't know what to do: I could stay and watch him leave which would break my heart even more, Leave and try and forget him or ask him why. I went for the third option.

"At least tell me why you're leaving." I muttered as I stood up and faced them both. Yoruichi didn't turn round but I could tell she knew I was there. Kisuke blinked, in utter surprise.

"Oh come on, Kisuke. Don't play dumb." I sneered, taking out my Zanpakuto and dragged it across the floor.

"Just tell me. I mean I was your girlfriend." I knew that immediately after I made that remark, I had hit a nerve. I didn't regret it; right now I was pissed off. My Reiatsu flared up violently, Captain's did too. His eyes darkened, but I could still see him. This was his face when he fought Hollows. I cocked my head as if to challenge him. He reacted by lungimg at him with Benihime, I dodged easily and swiftly. I jumped out the cave and onto the grass, he followed in suit. As I thrust at him with Satoshi, I raised my eyebrows and grunted under my breath:

"We could talk." He then sliced down my cheek,

"Or Not" I mumbled as I jumped in the air and spun holding Satoshi tightly; I stopped spinning and let myself fall back but as I did, I started to spin again but this time I spun head first at Kisuke my sword above my head. He dodged it with difficulty but I had stabbed him in the arm, deeply. He brought this upon himself. He could've told you. I ignored Satoshi, I told him to just do his job and shut up. We'd talk later. Kisuke looked at me. For a split second I thought he was going to throw in the towel but then he flash stepped to the side then the other, continuing till he got enough to strike. I laughed shakily as a memory flashed through my mind. Kisuke had only recently been assigned as Captain. We could only just about eat breakfast without making snide or sarcastic comments; we had to spar with each other as soon as we had finished breakfast. Yoruichi thought it would help us bond. We both scoffed at that but we did it anyway, only because we were both a little scared of her. We had come down to the training centre where many others were sparring: Kenpachi was taking on his whole squad; Sui-feng was flashing stepping around with some members of her squad. We went to a quiet corner and got some old wooden sticks.

"Ready?" Kisuke smirked; I just rolled my eyes and nodded. He had flash stepped very clumsily then almost struck me but as he was about to strike, I flash stepped to the side and pushed him over easily with my stick. I couldn't help but snigger, he looked flustered as he stood up and brushed himself down. He then tried to punch me, I caught it, and he pulled me down as he fell after I kicked him. We ended up rolling around, pulling each other's hair, biting. Like children.

I was brought back to reality as I heard a thud. I looked around and realized while I had been remembering, I had flash stepped subconsciously. As if I was in that moment once again.

"You never learn." I muttered, grinning. Kisuke grinned back; it was almost as if we were having fun, not fighting each other. Suddenly Yoruichi popped up out the hole and yelled,

"Kisuke! Come on we don't have long!"

His grin disappeared almost instantly, he looked at me sadly. He and I both knew it was the end. We both didn't want it to be. I gave him one last desperate look before walking over to him. I don't know what I was going to do. I didn't know if I was going to hit him or hug him. Whatever I was going to do as stopped by Yoruichi. She flash stepped like nothing I had ever seen before and punched me in the stomach, as wells as having tough and hard fists she had claws. Like a cat. They drove deep into my stomach, as soon as she dragged them out slowly; blood spurted everywhere. I fell in slow motion, everything was blurry, and my vision was black around the edges. I saw Kisuke rush towards me. His face had fear scribbled all over it. I giggled weakly,

"Kisuke…"

"Sakura… You'll be okay… Someone will come. I promise."

"So you're not staying?"

"No… I have to leave."

"Then go. If you ever come back, I swear to the Spirit King, you will die. So will she. I swear, now fuck off you bastard." I said, blinking back the tears, I felt a hole in my chest. It was my heart. Breaking. Kisuke smiled tightly then kissed my forehead and jumped down the hole. I coughed up blood violently as tears streamed down my face, silently. No noise escaped my lips. It couldn't words wouldn't sum up how I felt, what I was feeling.

So there I was left to die. By the man I loved. The man I shared my secrets with. The man I thought I could trust.