A splitting headache tore through his brain, the light too bright for his eyes even though he hadn't yet opened them. Lukas had never drank that much before, hadn't known how far his limits stretched. It was no wonder then, that he had found himself slightly sick, dehydrated and in immense pain. He was about to shove his face into his pillow when he realised it.

His pillow wasn't his pillow.

He opened his eyes slowly, just a little bit, enduring the pain to analyse his surroundings. This wasn't his room, let alone his bed that he was lying in. And yet it was familiar, far too familiar. The realisation was almost enough to make him forget his hangover induced headache and replace it with a stress induced one.
This was the moment Lukas realised his clothes were missing.

Everything started piecing itself together with horrifying clarity. Slowly, trying to not move his head too quickly, he turned around onto his other side, the side facing to other half of the bed. His heart seemed to jump into his throat at the sight that met him.

Mathias, his childhood best friend and avid party animal/host of the last night's extravaganza, lay beside him, toned arms and broad shoulders bare. He was sleeping peacefully, hair mussed.

To Lukas, the moment felt like he was being stabbed repeatedly, over and over, three words on repeat in his head. Oh my god.

The memories all came rushing to him at once. Both of them had been completely intoxicated, prone to making irrational decisions. He remembered the heat of the party room, filled with bodies upon bodies of partying teens, and yet he only cared for one.

He blinked a few times, eyes bearing into the other's face. As though he felt it, Mathias' eyes fluttered open. They looked at each other for an infinite moment, disbelief and confusion in both their eyes as well as on Mathias' features.

Finally, Mathias broke the silence, laughing awkwardly.

"Good morning?" The words were phrased as a question as he tried to sit up but failed, electing to lie on his side facing Lukas. Lukas barely knew how to breathe.
Not able to bring himself to answer, he looked away, attempting to roll away and out of the bed and as far away from talking about what happened as possible.
That was when a hand wrapped itself around his wrist.

He looked at Mathias' hand, large and firm around his arm, his muscles freezing in place. He didn't dare move.

"You remember it too." No longer a question. Lukas drew in a breath, closing his eyes. Feelings of skin against skin, warm lips against his collar bone, and pure, unadulterated bliss flooded to his senses, overwhelming.

Carefully, he nodded, still choosing to say nothing. He could feel Mathias' azure eyes on him, trying to make out anything from his face. Let him try, Lukas thought. He was interested himself to understand how he felt about the awkward situation he had found himself in.

"Do you... Do you regret it?" Mathias asked finally, the silence too overwhelming for them both, and yet Lukas still couldn't figure out how to speak again. So instead he thought. His memories raced back towards the previous night, the simple pleasure of being together with someone he cared about. It had felt... Wild and yet somehow all too natural. Like they had done it a thousand times before.

He felt Mathias' grip on him loosen, allowing him to walk away if he wanted. Mathias himself was making to sit up, rubbing his face with the palm of his hand. Lukas dared to look at his face for a brief moment. He looked shattered.

"I'm sorry."

It was a simple sentence, one said so often to express regret and dismay. And yet it destroyed Lukas' heart to hear them coming from the other's mouth. Was this all just a big mistake? Would they recover from it? The answer to both questions was a huge uncertainty. Suddenly, through his concern and overwhelming sense of shame, a moment of clarity struck him.

There was simply nothing to apologise for. Because in their drunken hazes, he remembered they had said somethings that they would have otherwise been too scared to admit outloud.

I love you.

The words had slipped out of their mouths so effortlessly in the heat of the moment, he didn't think either of them had paid them any heed at the time. That's why the night had felt so normal, why it felt like nothing was any different. In that exact moment, they had both let out years of anxiety, longing and desire. The alcohol had not given birth to the fire, it merely strengthened it, turning a small flame into a burning forest, ready to swallow them both alive.
As Mathias moved to stand up from his place on the bed, Lukas found his body move on its own, the turn now his to grab hold of the other like the world depended on it. Mathias stilled, looking over at him, lips lightly parted in wonder.

Lukas finally answered. "I don't."

He couldn't quite understand the reason why Mathias seemed to be looking at him as though for the first time. Following a moment of silence, a soft laugh escaped Mathias' lips, a precedent to the eruption of relieved joy. Lukas wasn't sure if his eyes were deceiving him, or if Mathias was crying.

He sat up, wanting to be on eye level with the other, examining his face. His features were sharp, freckles sprinkled on his sun-kissed cheeks. A small scar lined his lip from where he accidentally cut it falling on a fishing hook as a kid when they were playing by the river. He wanted to kiss it.

Mathias seemed to be matching his actions, eyes hooded by light, golden lashes, looking Lukas' face over. Gently, he placed a hand to the side of the Norwegian's face, Lukas just as softly pushing into the touch.

"Can I..." Mathias let the question hang in the air, swallowing yet unable to finish it. Lukas felt his heart hammer in his chest. Yes, he thought. Yes.

Mathias hesitated another few moments, unable to decide whether to finish the sentence or make a move. Lukas couldn't wait that long.

Mathias' lips were still as soft as he remembered from last night, his breath warm against his skin. He tasted of beer and Lukas loved every moment of it. Plaiting his fingers into Mathias' hair, he pulled him close, skin burning at the touch. They were still both naked but he didn't care, yearning for the warmth he felt kissing Mathias.
It felt like home.

Running out of breath, they pulled apart, gasping for air, eyes locked onto each other. Unbeknownst to each other, they both shared the same thought.

He's beautiful.

Lukas wasn't sure where they would go from there but one thing he knew. Mathias would be by him and that's what really mattered.

Did I say I was over hetalia? I meant I was taking a break from hetalia. God I can't escape.