Echoes

by DreamWvr73

A piece of the past comes back to cause trouble for MacGyver and Gillian.

The alarm clock on MacGyver's nightstand started going off, piercing the air with its loud buzzing. MacGyver opened his eyes; he was lying flat on his stomach. He was still fully dressed, wearing jeans and a thick long sleeved dark grey shirt. Gillian was beside him, she too was flopped down on the bed; not even bothering to take off her jeans and green turtleneck.

The couple had just gotten home from Egypt. Their flight landed at 1 am, by the time they got back to their house it was almost 2. They had literally walked into their bedroom, dropped their luggage and flung themselves on their bed.

"Mac…please do something about that clock before I throw it against the wall."

MacGyver sighed as he moved closed to the side of the bed. He picked up his blinking alarm clock and hurled it up against the wall, breaking the face open and scattering bits of alarm clock all over the carpeting. The buzzing promptly stopped.

"You mean like that?" He flopped back down on the bed.

"Yeah, except now we have to buy you a new alarm clock."

"Gill, we just spent 25 hours on a plane, I could care less about my poor broken alarm clock. I feel like I've been sent through a meat grinder about a dozen times."

Gillian rolled onto her side and moved closer to her husband; she lifted up his shirt and rubbed his back gently. "You're just exhausted Mac, you'll feel better when we've gotten some sleep."

"Let's promise ourselves right now that we're staying put for a while. No more overseas excursions for at least four months."

"Mac, you know as well as I do that we can't make that kind of promise."

He lifted his head and looked at her. "I know, just wishful thinking I guess."

Gillian nodded as she fixed his shirt and laid down next to him. The couple was touching noses. "But I can promise you that we can spend the next few days just resting and relaxing back in our enormous house." The young woman shook her head. "After living in that cracker box for what seemed like an eternity this place never looked so good."

MacGyver yawned, his eyelids feeling heavy. "Uh huh."

Gillian shook her head as she got up from the bed and took another comforter out of her closet. They were lying on top of everything, not even bothering to peel back the bed. She opened the folded blanket and spread it on top of her husband.

Mac was already fast asleep and Gillian kissed his forehead gently as she stroked his hair. "Good night Baby."

Gillian slid under the blanket beside her husband; she closed her eyes and joined him in the land of slumber.

Gillian opened the garage side door; she had a large box in her hands. She had woken up at a little after nine, peeled her grimy clothes off of her and took a shower. Gillian had put on a pair of black sweats and a blue flowered shirt. She went to the post office to pick up the almost two months worth of mail that had piled up. She hung up her keys above the light switch in the kitchen and dumped the large box onto the dining room table.

"My God." Gillian shook her head at the mountain of envelopes, magazines and advertisements that were scattered on top of the shiny wooden surface.

The young woman picked up a blue trash can they kept in a small corner of the kitchen. It was medium sized and had the word PAPER in thick black marker.

Gillian started tossing stuff into the recycling bin.

"Junk, junk, junk…" She whispered to herself as she put envelopes and magazine samples into it.

Finally the clutter had been reduced to a dozen envelopes. It was their bank statements, and some mail from Duncan about ME.

Gillian gathered them together and put them in a small wooden mailbox that hung next to the dining room phone. One of the envelopes fell and she bent down to pick it up. It was a wide envelope and had her husband's name in fancy calligraphy writing. The name on the return address was listed as Robinson.

"Hmmm."

MacGyver's wife slapped the envelope against the palm of her hand. She remembered her husband telling her about his friend Charlie Robinson and how he had died. Gillian decided that her husband had to see the envelope that had come for him.

MacGyver was lying in the exact same position he had been at three am when the alarm clock had woken them up. He had his hands tucked under his chin, clutching the comforter in them.

Gillian kicked off her hiking boots and climbed onto the bed. She was watching him asleep; he looked so comfortable she almost hated to wake him. The young woman put hand in his hair and started stroking it.

"Mac?"

He stirred a little, sighing as he rolled onto his back. He took a deep breath and let it out slowly.

Gillian leaned close to him and kissed his lips, nudging his cheek with her nose. "Mac?"

MacGyver's eyelids slowly raised, he saw his wife looking down at him. "Good Morning."

Her face finally came into focus and he pulled the comforter back and stretched. "What time is it?"

"Almost 9 30."

Gillian had the envelope in her hand. "How do you feel?"

Mac yawned and sat up; he rubbed his face. "Hungry." He saw the envelope his wife was holding and touched it. "What's this?"

"Part of the massive amount of mail I sorted through after I came back from the post office. It's addressed to you." She handed him the envelope and folded her legs under her.

"Robinson…" Mac saw the name and sighed. "It's from Charlie's wife Shirley."

He opened the envelope and pulled out a small note card, a gold embossed invitation fell out along with it. Gillian picked it up and read it. "You are cordially invited to attend the gathering of Echo Unit to be held on January 21 at the Woodsmen Inn, 7 pm." She lifted her head and looked at her husband. "Echo Unit?"

MacGyver glanced at the invitation his wife held, his face grew solemn. "Yeah, Echo was the group of guys the army used to defuse bombs in Viet Nam. It was me, Charlie and four other guys."

"And this is an invitation to unit's reunion?"

"Yeah." Mac looked at the note card that came with it. "Shirley sent this along with it."

"Dear Mac,

It's been 5 years since Charlie has been gone, but his little girl and I have somehow made it through. This year will make 20 years since you and the other Echoes were in that terrible place. Charlie talked often about getting together with the rest of the boys. I decided to honor his wish and get you all together. I know it won't be easy Mac but I want you to come and see not only me and our little girl but the rest of the guys too. I know Charlie would have insisted that you go so that's what I'm doing. Please think about it...

Love,

Shirley."

 

Gillian looked down at the invitation. "You never have said much about Viet Nam."

Mac read the words again. "I know, it was a long time ago Gill." He shook his head. "I was nothing more than a 21 year old kid the Army recruited out of a classroom."

She handed her husband the invitation. "You don't have to tell me about it if you don't want too, you know that." She put her hand on her husband's back. "Are you going to go?"

MacGyver was looking down at the invitation. "I really don't want too, but Shirley asked me to come. I can't say no to her." He turned towards his wife. "Will you do me a favor?"

Gillian nodded a small smile coming to her lips. "Sure."

"Will you come with me?" Mac swallowed hard. "I'd really like you to be there."

The red headed woman shook her head. "Mac, you don't have to ask me, of course I'll go."

MacGyver put his arms around his wife and hugged her hard. "Thanks."

Gillian was surprised by his reaction and even more so when she felt him tremble against her.

"Mac? Are you okay?"

"I was…now I'm not so sure." He whispered in her ear, his voice sounding slightly shaken.

Gillian could feel the anxiety coming off of her husband in waves. It was rattling her; she had never felt him like this before. "What is it? Why are you shaking?"

"I can't tell you Gill." He pulled back from her.

"I can see for myself." Gillian went cover his eyes but gently grabbed her wrists. "No, I don't want you to see."

Mac was holding her hands gently in his. "I'm going to go take a shower." He kissed her and touched his forehead to hers. "I'm sorry Gill, I just can't tell you." He whispered before getting up from the bed and going into the bathroom.

Gillian watched the bathroom door close; she had a feeling deep down this reunion wasn't going to be a happy one. 

MacGyver was standing in the shower, letting the hot water wash away the tension and anxiety that had settled into his shoulders and the back of his neck. He had his head hanging low, the pressurized water feeling like nails as it beat into his skin. His mind was racing, venturing back two decades into a dark and frightening place. A place tucked safely away in a small corner of his brain that he never visited that had altered the course of his life.

"Mac?"

The voice of his wife shattering his concentration like glass, he started and whipped around. "Yeah?"

Gillian had the curtain pulled back, a flash of worry going across her face. Her husband had the look of a deer trapped in a pair of headlights. "You've been in here a long time."

"Long flight." Mac tried to get her to smile but it didn't work; she wasn't buying his attempt at humor to cover the fact he'd been in the shower for the past 30 minutes.

Gillian nodded her head.  "I thought maybe you had drowned or had gotten kidnapped by aliens."

"Nah, they wouldn't want me." MacGyver smiled at his wife, it got wider when she returned it. "I'll be out in 10."

"Okay, when you come out of there I can make us some breakfast."

"Sounds good." Mac watched his wife start to close the curtain. He reached out and touched her hand. "Gilly Bean?"

The use of her nickname stopped her in her tracks. She focused her gaze on her husband. "Yeah?"

Mac tugged on her wrist, pulling her a little towards him. He was soaking wet but he didn't care. He hugged his wife to him. "Someday I'll tell you what happened, I promise."

Gillian closed her eyes as she hugged her husband. "I just want you to be all right, you scared me earlier when you weren't."

"I know, I'm sorry." He pulled back and touched her face. "That's why I want you to come to the reunion with me next week. You'll give me the courage I'm going to need to face that part of my life again."

Gillian took the hand from her face and kissed it. "I'll be there." She gave him a smile. "Now hurry up before you turn into a prune."

"Just give me five minutes!" Mac picked up his shampoo bottle as Gillian closed the shower curtain. He quickly started washing his hair and body.

The couple had eaten their breakfast together, MacGyver seemed to be all right but his wife could tell that he wasn't. He was being quieter than normal and wanted to keep to himself. Gillian left him alone, busying herself with removing the two layers of dust that had piled up on their furniture and doing a few other chores. She was in the garage putting their clothes from the trip on to wash when something caught her eye. It was a corner of what looked like a large box sticking out from underneath the metal shelf her husband had piled up with some photo albums and books from the houseboat.

Gillian crouched down and pulled the box out, it was an olive green footlocker. She ran her hand over a name and rank stenciled in white letters on the top of it. SPC MACGYVER.

"Specialist MacGyver." She whispered as she saw his social security number under his name. She knew the number by heart; it matched perfectly. The locker had a small pad lock on it, it was unlocked.

Gillian touched the lock, her fingers wrapping around it. She was terribly tempted to open it and was battling with herself on whether or not she should. The small gold lock slipped from between her fingers and she suddenly shook her head. "No…I can't. He said he would tell me."

The locker was promptly pushed back under the shelf and left alone.

MacGyver was in his bedroom, lying on the bed. He was still a little tired from the long flight and the time difference. He had the note from Shirley and the invitation in his hands. He was reading them over and over again. 20 years since you and the other Echoes were in that terrible place…

"20 years."  Mac said to himself and shook his head slowly. "Has it really been that long?"

Charlie talked often about getting together with the rest of the boys.

"You always were an old softie Charlie, even about that hell hole."

MacGyver closed his eyes and rubbed his hand over his face. He could still hear the bullets; the sound of his own heart thumping so hard he thought it would burst. The air was filled with the smell of smoke, blood and death. He could hear men shouting, drowned out by machine gun fire and the loud booming of grenades exploding.

Mac was still holding the invitation and the note in his hand when he drifted off to sleep.

Gillian was bent over putting clothes in the dryer when she heard something. She creased her brow, turning towards the open door.

"Mac?"

She heard it again and straightened up, walking over to the door. She put her hand on it and opened it all the way. "Mac? Did you call me?"  The air suddenly felt tense, so thick it felt as if a hand was closing around her neck as she stepped out into the hall.

Gillian gasped when she heard her husband cry out; she raced down the hall and opened the master bedroom door. The tension and anxiety in it were so strong the young woman couldn't breathe. She clutched at her throat as she saw her husband moving about on the bed. His eyes were closed and he was soaking wet with sweat. He was saying something barely audible amidst groans and mumbles.

"Charlie! We have to go, we have to go now! Come on!"

Gillian swallowed hard as she climbed onto the bed and touched her husband's shoulders. "Mac! Wake up!"

MacGyver's thrashing grew worse, his arms and legs flailing wildly as though he were running for his life.

Gillian climbed on top of him, straddling his chest as she put her hands on his shoulders and shook them. "Mac! Wake up! You're dreaming! Wake up!"

It had no effect on him and finally the young woman leaned over. "MacGyver! Wake up!" She shouted loudly just inches away from his shiny wet face. 

MacGyver gasped, his eyes flew open. He tried to sit up but couldn't. He was breathing hard and saw his wife leaning over him. "Gill?"

Gillian nodded as she climbed off of him. "Yeah, it's me." She sat beside him as he sat up slowly. He was soaking wet as if someone had thrown a bucket of water on him.

"What were you dreaming about Mac?" Gillian asked as she gently touched his sweaty hair, it was plastered to his face and she brushed it back.

"I don't know." Mac swung his legs around the edge of the bed. He leaned over, his head in his hands. "I don't remember."

"You were yelling for Charlie. You were saying that you had to go." Gillian moved beside him and put her hand on his back and rubbed it gently. "I could hear you all the way into the garage."

The note and the invitation were on the floor near Gillian's feet, she spotted them and bent over and picked them up. "Were you looking at these before you feel asleep?"

Mac lifted his head; he looked at his wife and nodded. "Yeah, I was just thinking about…old times."

Gillian sighed. "No wonder you had a bad dream." She put her arm around his shoulders and drew him to her.

MacGyver hugged Gillian, closing his eyes. He had lied to her, he knew exactly what he had dreamed about and it had left him thoroughly shaken up. "Guess I shouldn't have been nostalgic huh?"

Gillian nodded slowly as she stroked her husband's hair. "You want me to stay here with you for a while or do you want me to leave you alone?"

Mac pulled back from his wife and swallowed hard. "Will you stay with me?"

"You know I will." She touched his face gently. "Why don't you go in the bathroom and wash your face, you'll feel better."

"That's a good idea." MacGyver climbed off the bed on shaking legs and went into the bathroom.

Gillian sighed and rubbed her hand over her face; she never felt as helpless as she did right then. Her husband was being eaten alive by something and there wasn't one damn thing she could do about it.

Gillian glanced at her alarm clock, the red display said that it was 7 30. The young woman threw back the covers and sat up. She was worn out and achy, feeling absolutely terrible as she rubbed her neck. She glanced over at her husband, he was finally sleeping peacefully and she sighed out of relief.

Gillian had hardly slept; her husband had kept her awake most of the night with his restlessness. It had been the same way earlier that afternoon after his nightmare. The whole night long he tossed and turned, Gillian had tried to give him comfort and soothe him but it did little good; it was like trying to sleep with a live wire. She sighed as she ran her hand across her eyes. She had to do something.

Gillian quietly got out of bed and left the bedroom.

The fax machine was in the living room and she picked up the phone on it and dialed Pete's number, she hoped he was awake.

"Hello?"

Gillian adjusted the phone so it sat closer to her mouth. "Pete, its Gill. I didn't wake you up did I?"

"No, I was awake, you know me I'm am early riser, what's up?"

The young woman sighed as she leaned against the back of the couch. "Listen, do you still have your buddies at the Pentagon?"

"Sure, why do you want to know?"

Gillian swallowed hard as she glanced down the hall. "Pete, what can you tell me about Mac's tour of duty in Viet Nam?"

There was a pause on the line. "I can tell you some things; he was there for a year from 72 to 73 and was part of a bomb defusing team with Charlie Robinson and four others. If you really want to know more you should be asking Mac not me."

"I can't ask Mac Pete, he won't tell me anything I was hoping that maybe you could."

"I really don't know much about it Gill, he's never said."

Gillian sighed. "Then I want you to do me a favor."

"Sure, name it."

"I want you to get a hold of your buddies and see if they can find Mac's service record."

"His record? But why?"

Gillian glanced down the hall again at the master bedroom door. "I want to find out if there is anything mentioned in it about any incidents that Mac might have been involved in. Can you do it?"

She could almost hear Pete objection to this straight through the phone. "Yeah Gill, I can do it but the question is should I?"

"I wouldn't be asking Pete unless I had my reasons, you know that."

"Yeah I know." Pete sighed. "All right Gill, I'll fax anything I find, okay?"

"Okay Pete, I appreciate it. Talk to you later, bye."

"Bye."

Gillian hung up the phone and sighed, she felt a little better.

Gillian was in the kitchen making herself a cup of hot tea. She had just turned off the kettle and had poured the hot water into her mug. Her mind was concentrating on Pete, and she hoped that he would be able to find something useful in Mac's service record that would shed some light on exactly what happened 20 years ago. She was dunking her tea bag repeatedly into her mug.

"Gill?"

The young woman gasped at the sound of her name right behind her. She whipped around and saw her husband standing in the hallway. He had on sweat pants and a t-shirt.

"Hi." She set her tea bag down into her cup and gave him a smile. She stepped into the hall and hugged him. "How'd you sleep?"

"Okay." Mac leaned his head against his wife's shoulder as he wrapped his arms around her waist. "How about you?"

Gillian closed her eyes as she held her husband. "I slept okay.  I'm still not used to being back in our own time; my internal clock is still on Luxor time."

"Yeah, me too, it's going to take a few more days to get back to normal." MacGyver wanted so badly to tell her what was happening to him. He wanted to sit her down and tell her the truth but at the same time he was scared to death of how she would take it. He had no choice but to keep silent. 

"You want something to eat?"

"No, I'm not really hungry."

Their hug ended and Gillian touched her husband's face. "You sure? Not even some toast and hot chocolate?"

Mac nodded. "Actually that does sound good."

"Okay, why don't you go shower and I'll make it for you when you get out."

"I'll do that." Mac kissed his wife gently. "I'll be right back." He gave her a small smile as he turned around and headed back down the hall.

Gillian was back in the garage, the dryer was on and she was folding a load of dried clothes. Her husband was outside working on his truck. He had finally eaten and that had made her feel better. She thought she had heard the phone ringing but the blowing dryer was loud; it was hard to hear anything over it.

"If it's important they'll call back." Gillian said to herself as she folded up another t-shirt that belonged to her husband and set it on his pile.

"Gill…"

MacGyver's voice was low and it made the hair on the back of his wife's neck stand up as she slowly turned her head towards the door.

"Hi." Gillian's heart dropped into her toes when she saw he had a few pieces of paper in his hand. "What's that?"

Mac's face was serious; his dark eyes looked stern as they focused on her. "You tell me, it's a fax that just came in." His voice was cold and dangerous, and obviously angry.

Gillian swallowed hard. "Yeah, I was expecting something."

"Were you? Well then let's take a look at what you got." MacGyver looked down at the papers, shuffling them in his hands. "Interesting, it's from Pete and it looks like a service record." His eyes lifted from the papers to gaze at the young woman standing near the dryer. "My service record from Viet Nam." Both of his eyebrows went up. "Care to explain why you asked Pete to fax you this or should I draw my own conclusions?"

Gillian licked her lips and pressed them together. "I…I wanted to see it."

"Why? Because you wanted to see what happened over there? Why I won't tell you about it?" Mac took the papers and tore them up into many pieces. "I have my reasons and I told you that but obviously that wasn't good enough was it?" His volume was increasingly getting louder, echoing in the garage.

"I only wanted to see for myself!" Gillian wiped her hand down her mouth. "Whatever happened over there is tearing you up Mac! I knew I couldn't make you talk about it so I asked Pete if he would look into your record!"

MacGyver opened his hands, the ripped paper bits rained down to the cement floor at his feet. "You deliberately went behind my back!" He ran his fingers through his hair, the light from the garage catching his gold ring. "This is why isn't it?" He showed the ring to his wife. "You think that just because you're my wife that you're entitled to know everything about me don't you?"

Gillian was looking down at the cement; she lifted her eyes and looked at her husband. MacGyver's face was red. "No secrets…"

"That rule doesn't apply to everything, not something like this!"

"Why not? Why doesn't it? You think you are the only one that has something bad in your past? Well you're not! Bad stuff happens to all of us Mac, all of us! But that's part of what being married is all about! Taking the good with the bad too!" Gillian was shaking now, her own temper slipping through her fingers. "I don't know what happened back in that place two decades ago, but I had to try and find out."

"Why? Why do you have to know?"

"Because it's killing me seeing you like this!" Gillian said it a lot louder than she meant too, it reverberated through the garage. She felt the tears sliding down her face. "Do you know I didn't get one wink of sleep last night? I spent the entire night listening to you whimper and moan and groan in your sleep. You tossed and turned and thrashed around so bad it was like sleeping on a boat in the middle of the ocean." She took a deep breath and let it out slowly. "I couldn't take any more Mac! Do you understand what it's like when someone you love is hurting and there isn't anything you can do about it? That's why I did what I did! I couldn't take seeing you like this anymore!"

MacGyver had his hands on his hips; his lips were so tightly pressed together they almost disappeared. "You aren't my mother Gill! You don't need to protect me like I'm some little boy! I've been dealing with this for a long time before you came along!"

Gillian nodded. "Have you?"

Mac was taken aback what his wife said. "Have I what?"

"Been dealing with it? I don't think you have Mac and I think this little get together with your old friends only brought it back to you."

MacGyver shook his head as he tilted it back briefly. He looked around the garage and spotted his foot locker. It was only partially sitting under the shelf, looking as though it had been moved recently. He walked around his wife and pulled it out. He saw the open lock and he slowly turned his head and looked at her. "You've been into this haven't you?"

"No, I haven't."

Mac snatched the lock off and stood up. "This was locked! I locked it myself!"

Gillian shook her head. "The lock was open!"

"So you thought you'd help yourself to whatever was in there?"

"I didn't look inside it!"

MacGyver crouched back down and locked the footlocker. He shoved it back under the shelf and started to leave the garage.

"Where are you going?"

He stopped, his back was too his wife. "I thought I could trust you Gill, obviously I was wrong. You went behind my back and I don't know if can trust you anymore."

Gillian was crying harder now. "I only wanted to help you Mac, that's all I wanted to do. I didn't snoop in your foot locker either, the lock was already open."

His face turned bright red and his eyes seemed to turn almost black as he turned around and got right into his wife's face. "You want to help me? Did I hear you right?"

Gillian's eyes grew wide as she looked up at the extremely angry face of her husband. He backed her up against the dryer. She was breathing hard, she was absolutely terrified. "Yeah, that's… that's what I said." She swallowed hard; MacGyver had the look of cougar about ready to pounce.

Mac slowly turned back around and started to leave again; Gillian wiped her face and walked after him. "Mac, where are you going?"

"I'm out of here that's where! Some place where my nosy, back stabbing, overbearing mother hen of a wife isn't!"

Gillian ignored what he said and walked after him, she touched his shoulder as he came out of the garage. "Mac I don't think you should leave!"

"Well guess what? You're thinking days about me are over!" He wiggled his shoulder until her hand fell away.

"But I…"

Mac turned around and drew his arm back driving his fist right through the center of the side door. His hand was bleeding but he didn't care. "Just leave me alone, got it?"

Gillian could feel her heart breaking into a thousand pieces. "Please… don't go." She was barely able to get the words out.

MacGyver didn't say a word. He was furious and he had to get out of there. His black leather jacket was by the door and he shrugged it on. He took the keys to his Vette out of his pocket and slammed the door behind him as he left.

Gillian put her hand over her mouth trying to stop the sobs that threatened to choke out of her mouth. She leaned against the hallway wall, her eyes squeezed shut. She heard the Corvette start up and peel out as it drove away.

The rest of the day was absolutely hellish one for Gillian. She was going crazy wondering where it was her husband had gone. She had talked to Pete and asked him to let her know if Mac showed up. Pete assured her that he would; the stout man feeling a little responsible for the terrible fight between his friends.

The young woman was crying on and off most of the day; the cruel angry words spoken by her husband echoed in her head like a broken record. She went into their bedroom and laid down on the bed. She curled up in the fetal position clutching her husband's pillow against her. The hours continued to slowly tick by and as the sun began to set and the sky began to darken, Gillian wondered if she was ever going to see her husband again.

MacGyver was sitting in his Vette; he was parked down by the Marina looking at the empty platform where his houseboat once stood.  He got out and walked across the little wooden bridge and stepped out onto it. It was still partially black and charred from the explosion and fire that had blown the little floating house into a thousand burning pieces of wood.  Mac sat down on the platform and reached into his inner pocket and pulled out a little bottle wrapped in brown paper. He unscrewed the cap and had a sip, the whiskey burning his throat. He wiped his mouth and coughed at the brown liquid's strength.

"She had no right to do that…" He had another sip, coughing harder this time. He set the bottle down and wiped his hands down his face. "No right at all to go digging into my past!"

Mac drew his legs up and hugged them, he was shaking. He could smell the liquor on his breath and he put his forehead down on top of his knees. "I can't tell her, I just can't."

"Why can't you?" A voice was suddenly close to him; he looked up and saw Pete standing over him. The stout man was in his light tan windbreaker and jeans. He had his hands in his pockets.

MacGyver narrowed his eyes. "What are you doing here?"

Pete stepped out onto the platform and sat down. "Thought I might find you here. Gillian called me, she told me what happened."

"Still spying on huh? I'm not surprised." Mac picked up the bottle and had a sip.

"Can I have a swig of that?" Pete stretched out his hand.

"I don't think so, get your own."

Pete raised an eyebrow; his friend's tone was harsh. "You really think that's what she's doing?"

MacGyver scoffed. "And just what would you call it?" He had a big swig and put the cap back on before tucking the bottle into his pocket.

"I'd call it caring. She's worried about you Mac."

"She's got no reason to worry."

The stout man shook his head. "You two have a knock down drag out fight and you storm off and are now sitting on a slightly crispy platform indulging in a bottle of whiskey. But oh no she's got no reason at all to be concerned."

MacGyver turned towards his friend and shook his head, his face getting angry once again as he stood up. "I should have known you'd take her side."

Pete reached out and grabbed his arm and his best friend walked by him. "Mac, I don't know what happened and I don't pretend do. But what I do know is that you need to tell someone about it. You'll feel a lot better if you do."

MacGyver jerked his arm out of his friend's grasp. "What I need is for people to stop digging into my private life! That includes overbearing wives and friends!"

Pete got up fast. "You really believe that don't you! That Gillian betrayed you!"

Mac stood toe to toe with Pete. "What would you call it? She called you up behind my back and asked you to go look into my private file after I said that I would tell her someday! She just couldn't wait for me to tell her. No! She had to go sneaking around making phone calls!" He stormed off and Pete tried to grab him but Mac pulled out of his grasp. "Go home Pete! Tell my poor little worried wife I won't be home!"

Pete followed him all the way across the bridge. He watched Mac get back into his Vette and take off. The stout man shook his head; his best friend was even worse than Gillian had said.

A rather large 6 foot 2 man in a black t-shirt with a heavy build and a bald head had MacGyver by the back of his jacket. The bouncer escorted the angry man to the door and shoved him head first through it. Mac hit the wooden door; it swung open and dumped him into a pile of metal trash cans. The clanging of a body slamming into metal echoed loudly through the empty alley.

"Don't come back or I'm calling the cops!" The bald man said as he closed the back alley door and locked it.

Mac was spread eagle on top of a pile of black garbage bags and misshapen cans. He laid there breathing hard for a minute or two. His head was pounding from the trip through the back alley door. He wiped a little bit of blood from the corner of his mouth. He had gotten into a scuffle with a biker and the leather cladded man had decked him.

MacGyver slowly got up, his shoes feeling rather heavy as he walked through the alley to the front of the bar. He dug into his pocket for the keys to his Vette. His right hand was throbbing, he looked it. There were some deep scratches caused by the side door splintering when he punched it. He touched the corner of his mouth again and tasted the saltiness of his own blood. He unlocked the driver side door and got into the Vette. He stuck his keys in and went to start it. The rearview mirror was turned towards him and he caught a glimpse of himself in it. He froze and simply sat there looking at his own reflection. He saw an angry, hurt man with hollow lifeless eyes staring back at him. Everything that had happened over the past few hours came back at him and he shook his head slowly like he was watching a movie starring someone else.

MacGyver slapped his hands over his eyes. "What's happening to me?" He whispered to himself, his chest suddenly getting tight. He rubbed his hands down his face slowly, exhaling through them as they moved over his mouth. There was a pay phone right in front of him and he opened the door and got out. He took the phone off the hook and dug into his pockets for some change. He dialed a number and waited.

"Pete?"  Mac covered his eyes with his hand. "Mac." He swallowed hard. "Can you come down to the Handle Bar and get me?" He sighed as he uncovered his eyes. "I need you to help me…okay see you soon."

MacGyver hung up the phone; he zipped his jacket all the way up. He was shaking but it didn't have one thing to do with the cold night air. He got back into his Vette and waited.

Gillian had fallen asleep; she was still in her clothes. The ringing phone started her awake and she rolled over onto her side, nearly falling off the bed as she answered it.

"Mac?"

"No Gillian, it's me Pete."

Gillian sighed with disappointment as she turned on her lamp. "Oh, hey Pete."

"Gillian, Mac is here with me."

The young woman sat up fast, her heart racing. "He is? Is he okay? Where are you?"

"Just calm down, I'm in my office. Listen, do you remember meeting Dr. Linda Beatty?"

"Well yeah, she's a psychologist. But what has that to do with Mac?"

"She's here and she's going to talk to Mac about what's been happening to him. She wants you to be here."

Gillian swallowed hard, her eyes beginning to get watery. "I don't think he wants me to Pete."

Pete's voice grew soft. "Gillian he does. He called me half an hour ago from outside the Handle Bar. He asked me to come get him and give Doc Beatty a call."

The young woman nodded. "All right, I'll be there in 10 minutes."

Gillian hung up the phone and got off of the bed.

Dr. Linda Beatty was sitting on her black leather chair in a pair of grey sweats and a white t-shirt. This was a far stretch from her usual professional attire but the lateness of the hour and the urgency of Pete's call prevented her from more formal dress. The older woman with the dark hair and dark eyes crossed her legs; she was watching her friend standing by the window looking down at the street below.

"What kind of day have you been having MacGyver?"

Mac had his back to her, he chuckled softy. "A great one Doc, just peachy. I fought with my wife, put my hand through a door, almost got into a fight with my best friend and got kicked out of a bar and thrown onto a pile of garbage for fighting. How does that sound?"

"Sounds like you're angry. Want to tell me why?"

"No, not really but that sort of defeats the purpose of coming here, doesn't it?"

Linda nodded. "Yes it does. Why are you angry Mac?"

MacGyver sighed and turned around to face her. "I've got a secret, something that I've never told to another living soul."

Linda nodded. "Secrets are hard things to carry around in your heart. Most times they're like a stone around your neck; if you don't get rid of it eventually it'll drown you."

Mac sighed. "Is that what's been happening to me? Am I drowning Doc?"

"I think so." Linda cleared her throat. "When did all this start?

"Yesterday, after I got an invitation to go to the 20th reunion of my unit from Viet Nam."

Linda nodded. "I see...and this secret of yours involves Viet Nam, right?"

"Yeah it does."

She pointed to a chair next to hers. "Why don't you have a seat?"

Mac shook his head. "No thanks I'd rather not."

"That's fine as long as you're comfortable."

MacGyver ran his fingers through his hair. "Actually I'm not comfortable, not at all."

"I understand." She switched legs and adjusted herself a little in the chair. "Want to tell me about Viet Nam?"

"No, but I think I have too, right?"

Linda smiled. "Yes you do, if you want to stop the anger you're feeling you have to get it off your chest."

Mac sat on the edge of Linda's desk, his legs swinging a little. "I was there for a year, from 72 to 73."

Gillian was sitting beside Pete; she was holding the stout man's hand listening to her husband. They were sitting in two chairs in front of a two way mirror. The tears were already falling from the young woman's eyes and MacGyver had barely started speaking.

"He looks awful Pete…it doesn't even look like my husband." She wiped her eyes, her legs bouncing up and down.

"I know Gill, but he's going to be all right. It was his idea to come here, so he's not totally lost to us."

Linda nodded. "And what was your job there?"

MacGyver swallowed hard. "I was part of a unit that the Army assigned to defuse and dispose of bombs. We were called Echo Unit. There were six of us, I was the youngest."

"How old were you?"

"I had barely turned 21 a few days before I was shipped out." Mac looked down at the light tan carpeting. "All the guys called me Squeaks."

Linda couldn't help but smile. "And why was that?"

"Because they said I was so green and so clean I squeaked when I walked."

The psychologist couldn't help but laugh a little. "They sound like a great bunch of guys."

"They were, and I'm sure they will be again when I see them."

Linda leaned back a little in her chair. "You don't sound very happy about seeing them again."

"I'm really not."

"And why is that?"

MacGyver shook his head, he didn't say a word.

Gillian could see her husband's courage was quickly leaving his body. She put her hand on the glass wanting so badly to hold him to her. "I'm here Baby, I know you can't see me but I'm here."

Pete put his arm around the young woman's shoulders and rubbed them. "He knows you're here Gill, I'm sure of it."

"MacGyver…why aren't you happy to see your old friends?" The psychologist took a shot in the dark. "Is it because they're a reminder of what happened?"

The blond man's eyes lifted, focusing on the doctor. "Yeah, they are."

Linda uncrossed her legs. She folded her hands in her lap. "They all were there that day, weren't they? They saw what happened. That's why you're angry Mac because of what happened 20 years ago. Your secret came out of the box you tucked it into and now it's staring you right in the face screaming to be dealt with. The only way you're going to be free of it is to talk about it. You need to tell me, Pete and especially Gillian."

Mac shook his head fast. "No, I can't tell Gillian."

"Why not? She's your wife, she'll understand."

"No she won't! If she finds out what happened she'll…"

Linda stood up. "She'll what?" The older woman walked over to her patient and stood in front of him. "She'll leave you? Is that what you think will happen?"

MacGyver swallowed hard, he gave the doctor a slight nod of his head.

"What? That's ridiculous!" Gillian was on her feet fast. "He thinks I'll leave? What kind of crap is that?"

Pete also stood up and tried to calm the young woman down. He put his hands on her shoulders. "Gill, it's all right, just calm down."

"Calm down?" She pointed to the mirror. "Did you hear what he said?"

"Yes I heard him."

Gillian shook her head. "I can't believe he would think that!"

"Don't you think you're making an assumption about your wife MacGyver? Possibly an incorrect one?"

Mac didn't say anything, he simply lowered his head. "I don't think so."

Linda folded her arms over her chest. "You think that whatever you're keeping from her is so bad she'll simply walk away?"

"She'd have every right too."

Linda moved closer to him and touched one of his hands on her desk. "Why don't we talk about this secret of yours?"

Mac curled his fingers around her hand. "I don't know if I can. I don't think I have the guts too."

"I think you do, otherwise you wouldn't be here in the first place."

MacGyver lifted his head to look at her. "I had no where else to go, I don't think my wife wants anything to do with me right now."

"Because of the fight you had? All couples fight."

"We don't, not really. We get along pretty well usually."

"And today?"

"I told her she had betrayed me and that I couldn't trust her anymore." Mac let go of Linda's hand and wiped his face. "I don't know if she'll even let me back into our house."

"Maybe, maybe not. She loves you Mac, I doubt that will change."

MacGyver uncovered his eyes. "I bet it can."

Linda went back to her chair and sat down. "Why don't we find out?"

"How?"

She glanced at the mirror, she was fully aware of who was behind it. "Look at the mirror MacGyver."

Mac turned and looked at the mirror. "What about it?"

Linda's face grew serious. "Gillian and Pete are behind it."

The blond man's heart sunk into his shoes as he got up from the desk. He walked over to the center of the mirror. He saw his reflection and he swallowed hard. "Can they see me?"

"Yes they can, they can see and hear what's going on."

MacGyver stood in front of the mirror, imaging his wife standing just on the other side of that glass.

Gillian was, she was directly in front of it. "I can see you Mac, I'm right here." His dark eyes looked so empty and distant.

"He looks so lost Pete, like a scared little boy."

Pete nodded his head. "He is Gillian, in a way that's exactly what he is."

"MacGyver, Pete and Gillian don't have to be there. If you don't want them to hear anything I can move them to another room. You can tell them on your own another time."

The blond man shook his head. "No…I've put them through enough already today. They deserve to know the truth."

Mac lifted his hand and put it against the glass. He knew his wife was there, he could almost feel her.

Gillian's eyes grew wet. She raised her hand and touched it to his. "I wish I could be there with him Pete. I want to be there so badly."

"I know you do Gill, when he's done talking then you can be with him. He's going to need you now more than ever when he gets this off his chest."

Linda was watching her patient. "Why don't you sit down?"

Mac nodded, as he turned away from the mirror. He sat down on the floor in front of the desk leaning his back against it. He drew his legs up and hugged them tightly. He could feel his whole body slightly tremble. He wanted so badly to just open his mouth and let it all come pouring out.

MacGyver took a deep breath and let it out slowly. His mind began to drift, going back two decades.

Mac watched as the walls off the office began to curl up and peel away. The thick green leaves and heavy foliage of jungle terrain popping out through them. The hard desk he was leaning against began to grow soft; it slowly crumbled away turning into a wall of a freshly dug out trench. The office began to darken, the air becoming fragrant with the damp smells of the night.

"Don't fall asleep Squeaks, remember what happened to Nickels?"  A voice was right beside him; he turned and saw it was the smiling face of Charlie Robinson.

"Yeah, who can forget that?"

Charlie started laughing and shook his head. "Nickels certainly won't, that I can promise you."

"That's what he gets for falling asleep on guard duty."

"And he hasn't since; probably afraid of what kind of idea you'll come up with next to keep him awake." Charlie reached into his uniform pocket. "Here, I brought you a little pick me up." He pulled out a couple of chocolate bars and handed them to him.

MacGyver took them and shook his head. "Where'd you get these from? There's not exactly a candy store around here."

"Traded the latest issue of Playboy to Garner for them, I hate to think of what he's doing with those pictures right now." The man dressed from head to toe in green camouflage shuddered.

Mac peeled back the wrapper and had a bite. "Somehow I think he got the better end of the deal; naked girls beat chocolate any day of the week." Mac folded the wrapped back over the candy and tucked them into his pocket.

"Depends on the girl." Charlie gave his friend a smile, it turned into a yawn and he covered his mouth with his hand.

"Why don't you go get some sleep? I've got the night covered."

Charlie smiled at his friend. "Now that I can be sure of. See you in the AM Squeaks."

"Night Charlie."

Mac watched as his friend walked down the trench, with a few seconds the dark night enveloped him and Charlie disappeared from his sight. The rest of the guys were sleeping at the other end of the long trench and Mac wished he could join them, but it was his turn at guard duty. He sighed as he stood up, picking up his M-16, securing the strap across his chest as he crawled over the top of the trench.  The area they were in was pretty thick and isolated. Mac walked a little in the jungle, brushing back some of the long leaves as he sat down again. The trench was directly in front of him and he kept both eyes on it.

MacGyver yawned widely as he took his helmet off, running his fingers through his short dark hair. He set it aside as he checked his watch. The glowing hands read that it was almost four am, in two more hours his shift would be over and he could catch a couple hours of sleep. He yawned again, rubbing his hands over his face. A rustling behind him reached his ears and he started to turn around.

A piece of rope suddenly looped over his head and tightened. He was pulled backwards landing flat on his back, the rope digging deeply into his neck. He looked above him and saw a dark arm rising. The moonlight reflecting off of a long blade as it rose higher in the air.  MacGyver started to struggle, grabbing at the rope that was around his neck. He opened his mouth to try to let the other guys know what was happening but it did little good. The rope was too tight, he couldn't make a sound. His heart froze in his chest and his dark eyes widened as the blade came down fast. The last thing MacGyver was aware of was the burning pain of a sharp blade piercing into his body and the sudden gush of his own warm blood as it soaked into his camouflage shirt.

Consciousness came slowly to the young man, and with it came pain. A deep throbbing pain was in his stomach and a mild burning pain was in his neck.  Mac slowly opened his eyes; he was lying flat on his stomach; his own weight only adding to the pain there. He could hear voices not too far away and they weren't speaking English.  He turned his head and lifted it a little; there were four Viet Cong soldiers in dark green, standing on the top of the trench. He wondered to himself if they had killed Charlie and the others. Probably not, they'd take them prisoner so they could get information out of them…He thought to himself as he looked around. His M-16 was gone; he looked back and saw that one of the soldiers had it around his chest.  Mac's mind started racing, he was going through a list of everything he carried with him in his mind. The only other weapon he carried was a small pistol he had strapped to his leg.

MacGyver got up slowly, not wanting to give away the fact that he was still alive. He was sitting up and he touched his stomach, feeling his wet shirt. He pressed his hand to his belly, trying to stop the bleeding. He gritted his teeth as he bent over and touched his cuff. He pulled it out of his blouser and hiked it up.

Mac's stomach was hurting him as he pulled his pant leg high enough up to reveal a small silver handgun. It was a Walther PPK, secured to his leg with two strips of duct tape.

The four Viet Cong soldiers were smoking cigarettes and conversing with each other. After a few minutes they stopped and jumped down into the trench. There was loud shouting as each one of the Echo Unit members was hauled out of the pit. They were thrown to the ground, their hands tied behind their backs. MacGyver was watching this; he had circled around and was now in the jungle right beside the trench. He saw his 5 friends all lying face down on the ground.

Mac didn't know what to do, his heart was pounding so hard in his chest he felt lightheaded. He hissed through his teeth as his open belly gave him another painful reminder of its presence. The gun felt cold and hard in his hands as his fingers curled around it.  The young man knew he had to do something, he wasn't about to let his friends die or be tortured to death.

The enemy soldiers were exploring the contents of the trench. They had taken out five M-16s from the pit along with some supplies. A few more of them showed up and took the guns and the supplies away.

The Vietnamese men had found Garner's Playboy; they were smiling and laughing as they flipped through the magazine, gawking at the pictures of the naked women.

The sound of gunfire suddenly rang out, ending the peeping party. The soldiers dropped the magazine, all running into the jungle to take cover. They were looking around, trying to figure out where it was coming from.

Mac emerged through the jungle and belly flopped beside Charlie. The stunned man had wide eyes as he saw his bloody pale friend.

"Mac! We thought you were dead!"

"Yeah so did I!" He untied Charlie's hands and ankles. The soldier got up slowly and helped untie the black haired man beside him. "Just hang on Garner I'll untie you."

MacGyver was crouched down keeping an eye out. He fired his Walther a couple more times to keep the enemy soldiers from coming back. His back was to the jungle.

A loud cry rang out and Mac felt someone tackle him from behind. He landed on his stomach with a painful thud; he was rolled onto his back and was face to face with another Viet Cong soldier. The young man's eyes grew wide when he saw the hate in the soldier's dark eyes. The man gritted his teeth and tried to pull his knife off of his belt. Mac grabbed his arm and the two men were once more rolling around.

Charlie and the others had dove back into the trench. They all knew they were sitting ducks. Their weapons were gone and it was only a matter of time before the other soldiers came out their hiding places and killed all of them. The five other members of Echo Unit were all too occupied with their situation to even know what was going on a few feet above them.

MacGyver was once more on his back, he was still struggling with the soldier. A shot rang out and the soldier on top of him grew still. Mac was breathing hard, he creased his brow. The soldier's face dropped, he looked down into the eyes of the young man.

MacGyver didn't understand what had happened. He watched the man's dark epicanthic eyes, the hate and anger that were so prominent in them suddenly disappeared. Mac looked down; he saw the barrel of his PPK against the soldier's stomach. The soldier on top of him was dying and he was the reason why.

The breath felt like it was stuck in Mac's chest; he could barely breathe as he watched the cold darkness of death slip over the Viet Cong man's face like a veil. His dark eyes taking on a blank expression as the last breath the soldier ever took hissed as it escaped from his nose and mouth.

The young man was staring into the soldier's empty eyes. He had taken the life of another human being. Something deep inside MacGyver snapped, his eyes flashed as his adrenaline kicked in. He got his leg up and kicked the dead weight off of him. He dropped his PPK and took the knife out of the VC's belt. He tucked it into his own.

Mac's face was an unholy combination of fear and horror as he unhooked the M-16 from around the dead man's chest and put it across his own.  He stood up and started walking straight towards the jungle where the other VC were hiding,

Charlie peeked over the top of the trench, he saw his friend walking right into the line of fire. "MacGyver!" He tried to climb over the trench but Garner grabbed him.

"Are you nuts? Stay down!"

"MacGyver is heading straight towards them!"

The dark haired man glanced over the edge. "Yeah I see; he's going to get his farm boy ass shot off!"

Charlie tried to break free of Garner's grip. "Let me go! We have to stop him!"

A tall man with a platinum blond buzz cut had a large scowl helped Garner keep Charlie under control. "Just cool it Robinson, we can't help him now!"

"Yes we can Pulaski!"

Pulaski grabbed Charlie by his uniform and pulled him close. "There are four VC out there heavily armed! Do you want to walk out of this jungle or be buried here?"

Charlie looked into Pulaski's angry blue eyes. "I want to walk out of here."

The blond man nodded. "Well so do I, so you just shut your mouth and stay put! I don't know what that damn kid is up to but I'm going to wait and see before I climb out of this trench and catch a bullet!"

The VC saw a young kid with dark hair walking towards them. They all shouted to each other in their native tongue and raised their guns, emerging from the thick foliage.

Mac's face had a cold, dangerous expression. He dropped down onto his belly and started firing his M-16. The bullets splashed across three of the men's chests, they're bodies bucked with the impact of them. A spray of blood hitting the air as the men dropped to their knees and fell over. There was one soldier left and MacGyver aimed his assault rifle. He pressed the trigger; all he got was a loud click. He threw it aside as he grabbed the knife out of his belt.

The VC soldier was trying to get his own rifle to fire, it was jammed. The last thing he saw was a young man with blood in his eyes diving at him.

Mac threw himself at the soldier, knocking his rifle from his hands. He raised his arm and slashed the man across the throat. A gush of blood partially erupted and sprayed out of his severed jugular, hitting the young man. It covered MacGyver's face and the front of his already bloody uniform. In a matter of seconds the soldier was dead, lying in a pool of his own blood.

MacGyver stood up; he very calmly turned around and headed for the trench. He only made it halfway there before his adrenaline rush was starting to fade. His knees wobbled and gave out, forcing the bloody man down on them.

Mac was kneeling on the ground; he was breathing hard looking down at the knife in his hand. He was coming back to himself and the realization of what he had just did hit him like a bolt of lightening.  His adrenaline was gone and with it came a wave of burning pain that ripped through his belly.  It forced him to double over; the knife slipping from his hand as he touched his forehead to the ground.

"Charlie! We have to go, we have to go now! Before the others come back!"

Charlie and the others came out of the trench, they saw their bloody friend. They watched as MacGyver keeled over onto his side.

"Mac!" Charlie crouched down; he rolled his friend over onto his back and began unbuttoning his shirt. "You got them Mac, good for you."

Mac had a stunned expression on his face as his friend opened his shirt. "I killed them."

"Yeah you did or they might have killed you." Charlie looked down at his friend's wounded stomach. "This isn't bad at all Mac, it's just a scratch." He took a bandana out of his pocket and pressed it to the small wound.

Charlie lifted his eyes and looked at his four other compatriots. The men all walked over to their fallen friend and stood over him.

"Jesus Christ, what happened to him?" Garner asked as he saw the speckles of blood covering MacGyver's face and uniform. "Why did he do that?"

A shorter, pudgier man with thick black Army issue glasses and blond hair, scoffed as he looked down at MacGyver. "He got a case of the Spooks, Garner that's what happened."

Garner shook his head. "That was the damndest thing I ever saw Wyler."

Pulaski nodded. "Fear can make you do crazy things, even walk right into a line of gun fire." He looked at Charlie. "So do we dig a hole or is he going to make it?"

Charlie sighed. "You're concern is touching Pulaski, but yeah he's going to be okay."

"I can't believe this Minnesota farm boy just saved your asses!"

Garner nodded. "Yeah tell me about it Wyler; he'll probably get a medal for this."

Nickels was a short man with bright red hair and freckles. He pulled out a pack of smokes from his pocket and lit one. "If he does I'm going home!" He said as he blew out the smoke. "That little skinny turd's a hero!"

"Come on you guys, leave him alone. He's had quite an exciting night." Charlie couldn't help but notice how quiet his friend was. He knew it was from more than just the wound in his belly. He put a hand on his friend's shoulder. "You did the right thing Mac, I know you don't believe that but it's true."

MacGyver didn't answer him, his dark eyes began to grow wet and a tear escaped from them and rolled down his face…

Linda got up from her chair and knelt down beside her patient. He was lying on his back, looking up at the ceiling.

"Charlie was right MacGyver, whether you believe it or not. Charlie and your other friends owed their lives to you." She was getting no response and she turned towards the mirror.  Linda got on her feet and opened the door to that room.

Gillian was sitting beside Pete, the young woman's eyes and nose was red from crying. She saw the door open and the doctor poke her head in.

"Gillian I think you better come talk to him."

The young woman turned and looked at Pete. The stout man too had tears in his eyes. He could understand now why Mac had been acting the way he had been. He had been traumatized by fear and had done something heroic yet savage. "Go on Gill, he needs you."

MacGyver's wife got on her feet, she wiped her face. "Can I be alone with him?"

Linda nodded. "I think that'd be the best thing to do. Pete and I will go downstairs and get some coffee."

Pete and Linda both went out the other door and left the room.  Gillian watched as they walked down the hall to the elevator. She closed both doors as she stepped into the office. Her husband was still lying on the floor, he looked almost catatonic.

Gillian walked over to him and knelt down. She reached out and gently stroked his hair. "Mac? Can you hear me?"

The jungle he was still in began to dissolve, replaced by walls and a ceiling. He heard a gentle voice call out his name. Charlie's face was replaced by that of a woman's. Her pretty face was fuzzy as it leaned over him; she was calling his name. It was soft at first but the volume grew louder. He blinked as his eyes focused on Gillian's face.

Gillian gave her husband a watery smile as she saw his eyes gaze at her. There was recognition in them. "Hi Baby."

MacGyver's dark eyes grew shiny; he covered them with both his hands. "Oh God…" He sat up and moved away from his wife. He curled his legs up; he wrapped his arms around them and buried his face in them. 

Gillian moved close to him and touched his shoulder. "Mac…"

"I killed them! I took their lives! They're dead because of me! How can you stand to look at me? You should just go!" He managed to choke out in between sobs and hitching breaths.

The young woman shook her head as she moved in front of him. She touched his head, stroking his hair. "I'm not going anywhere. Do you hear me?" She stuck her hand in between his knees and touched his chin. She lifted it and looked it into his wet, remorseful face. "Do you understand?"

MacGyver did nothing, simply gazed at his wife.

Gillian's face was wet too, and the tears were rolling down her cheeks. "I'm not going to leave you! Do you have that straight? I'm staying with you, got it?"  Mac tried to look away and his wife cupped his chin. "Answer me!" She was crying harder now. "Please."

MacGyver swallowed hard. "Got it…" He whispered.

Gillian let go of his chin and wiped his face gently. "I love you Mac, and nothing you've said tonight or any other night is ever going to make me stop loving you. Do you understand?"

Mac nodded his head slowly; he lowered his legs and stretched out his arms to his wife; silently asking her to hold him.

Gillian's lips trembled slightly as she moved in between his legs and hugged her husband. She squeezed her eyes shut as she held him tightly to her.

MacGyver finally broke down, burying his head in his wife's shoulder as he clung to her. "I'm sorry Gill…I'm so sorry."

"No, you don't have to be Baby. I was wrong; I shouldn't have gone behind your back like that. I just didn't know what else to do."

"It's not your fault; I was the one with the secret." He took a deep breath and let it out slowly. "I'm the one that killed five people!" He squeezed his wife tighter as the words came out of his mouth.

Gillian shook her head. "Mac." She stroked his hair gently. "Baby you were scared! You were out of your mind with terror! It happens to a lot of soldiers in your kind of situation!" She sighed as she felt him shaking against her. "You were a 21 year old kid stuck in a war zone. The fear got to be too much for you and it took over!" Gillian pulled back and looked at him. "But despite that you still saved Charlie and the others. If you hadn't done that all of them would be dead and so would you." Her hands touched his cheeks gently. "You have to let it go Baby. It's been 20 years and you have more than made up for the lives you took."

MacGyver swallowed hard, he was beginning to calm down. "Have I?"

Gillian nodded. "Yeah you have. If you wasn't for you I wouldn't be here, and neither would Pete, or Jack. And there are at least a dozen other people I could name that are alive today because of you. That's more than adequate restitution for five lives two decades ago."

Mac lowered his head and hugged his wife again. "I felt so horrible, so ugly inside. Everyone kept saying I was a hero but I didn't feel like one. They even gave me a medal that I didn't want."

Gillian creased her brow. "What medal did you get?"

"The Bronze Star."

The young woman gasped and pulled back from her husband's embrace. "They gave you the Bronze Star?"

MacGyver sniffled and cleared his throat. "It's in my footlocker."

"Maybe it's time you brought it out." Linda and Pete were standing a few feet away from them. The psychologist knelt down before her patient.

"How do you feel?"

Mac took a deep breath and let it out slowly. "Better…relieved."

Linda nodded. "That's good, it's a start."

Gillian reached down and took her husband's hand. "Does he have to start seeing you now?"

The doctor shook her head. "No, I don't think so. He has you if he feels like talking, you'll listen, right?"

"Of course I will."

"That's good and you can give him the kind of comfort and healing he can't get from me." Linda touched the young woman's arm.

MacGyver nodded, he felt drained and worn out. "What about the reunion?"

Linda looked at her patient. "My last bit of official advice is for you to go. I think the best thing in the world for you would be to see your old friends again. Let them tell you about their lives in the two decades since the war was over; lives they wouldn't have had if not for you, okay?" She gave her patient a smile. "Think you can go there and have a good time?"

"I think so, with those guys I probably will."

Linda stood up, looking down at the couple. "Why don't you two go home now and get some sleep?"

Gillian got up; she still had her husband's hand and pulled him to his feet.  She let go of his hand and hugged the older woman. "Thank you Linda."

The psychologist returned her hug. "You're welcome, I'm just glad I could help."

MacGyver waited his turn and hugged the doctor. "Thanks Doc, I owe you one."

"You go home now and take care of yourself, okay? If you feel like talking your wife is willing to listen. Don't be afraid to tell her the truth. She's a big girl, she can take it."

"No more secrets, I promise."

"Good." Linda pulled back and looked at her patient. "Have fun at the reunion."

MacGyver nodded. "I'll let you know how it goes."

Pete had MacGyver's black leather jacket with him. He raised his hand to Linda. "Night Linda."

"Good night."  She waved as the three of them left her office.

MacGyver took a nice hot shower, washing away the smell of booze and garbage that had permeated straight through his clothes. He had put on a pair of red sweats and a light grey t-shirt. After his shower he disappeared into the garage.

Gillian was waiting for him to come to bed. She was sitting against the headboard in her long sleeved pink nightgown. She leaned over a little, trying to see down the hall. "Mac? Sweetie, are you coming to bed?"

"Yeah, I'll be right there."

MacGyver came into the bedroom carrying his footlocker. He walked around to his side of the bed and sat down beside his wife. He had his keys with him and unlocked the small gold lock.

Gillian was watching him. "You've had a rough night Mac; this can keep for another time."

"No, I want to show you." He lifted the wooden lid; the first thing on top was a dark green camouflage uniform shirt. It was folded in half. The name on the branch tape above the left pocket said MACGYVER in thick black stitching on an olive drab background.

Mac smiled a little as he picked it up and unfolded it. He unbuttoned it and raised his arms, slipping it on. He closed the two ends and shook his head. "It still fits, how scary is that?"

"So you were a bean pole then too huh?"

"I was born a bean pole."

Gillian laughed as she helped him take the shirt off and slipped it on. She tried it and to her disappointment it didn't fit across her chest. It was a little tight, the ends were gaping open. "Oops, it doesn't fit me."

MacGyver raised an eyebrow as he looked at the shirt. "I can give you two reasons why."

"Yeah I know, because I have a chest and you don't." Gillian unbuttoned it and left it open. "There, a nice jungle camouflage shirt. I think I'll go out in the backyard and blend in." She looked down at it. "It even has my name on it."

"You mean my name." Mac pulled out a pair of folded up camouflage pants and a pair of almost brand new combat boots and set them down on the bed. "I can use those boots."

"They look hardly worn."

Mac picked up a cigar box and opened it. He started pulling out black and white photos. He picked one up of himself and shook his head. "God what a geek I was. No wonder they called me Squeaks."

Gillian took the photo from him and smiled. It was a photo of her very young husband dressed in his full camouflage uniform, complete with his helmet at his side and an M-16 in his hands. He had a big smile on his face. "Aww what a cutie! And boy was your hair dark."

"Not much sun in Minnesota." Mac found one of him and the other 5 guys. "Here we are, the Echoes."

She leaned close to her husband and looked at the picture. "So these are the guys I'm going to meet except for Charlie."

"Right, but you'll meet Shirley and their daughter." MacGyver gave his wife the photo and set the cigar box aside. There was a Playboy magazine on the bottom and Mac pressed his lips together, trying to stop a snicker from escaping. "Uh oh, forgot this was in here." He picked up the magazine and rolled it up.

Gillian cleared her throat, raising an eyebrow. "But you just read it for the articles right?"

MacGyver's face flushed. "You know the answer to that." He saw the way his wife was looking at him. "What? So I was young and horny, okay? I was just a kid."

"That's not a very good excuse Mac."

"Why not?"

Gillian grinned. "Because you're still young and horny."

Mac shook his head as he took out a canteen and the belt it fit on. There was a beige bundle in the bottom of the locker. He picked it up; it was a manila envelope that had been wrapped around something several times. Gillian saw his dog tags and she looked at them briefly before setting them down on the bed.

"What's that?"

"You'll see." MacGyver unrolled the envelope and stuck his hand inside. He pulled out two black velvet boxes. He set one down on his lap and opened the other one. In it was a bronze medal; it was about the size of a silver dollar. It was hanging from a yellow ribbon with 3 red stripes in the middle and two green stripes, one on each side. "It's my Viet Nam service medal. Everyone got one for being over there."

Gillian took the box from him and looked at the medal. The words REPUBLIC OF VIET NAM SERVICE were inscribed in the front. She turned it over and UNITED STATES OF AMERICA was inscribed on the back. "Nice." She closed the box and set it down on the bed.

Mac picked up the other box and opened it. Inside was a large bronze star with a smaller star in the middle. It hung from a red ribbon with a thick blue stripe going down the center of it.  "This is my star." He turned the box so his wife could look at it. 

Gillian flipped it over and read the back. "HEROIC OR MERITORIOUS ACHIEVEMENT SPC. MACGYVER." 

MacGyver shook his head as he closed the box. "I don't think I deserved it." He put it back in the manila envelope along with the other one and wrapped them back up. He started putting everything back in his footlocker. He set it down on the floor; the only thing missing from it was his camouflage shirt. "Can I have my shirt back now?"

Gillian shook her head. "Sorry GI Joe, it's mine now." She looked down at it. "I bet you anything I know why this won't fit."

"You have boobs Gill, I thought we settled that?"

"I think it's my nightgown." She got up from the bed. "I'll be right back."

MacGyver yawned as he leaned back against the headboard, crossing his ankles. He had his eyes closed as he folded his hands on top of his stomach. "Gill, come on now it's really late, I want to go to sleep."

The bathroom door opened and the young woman stepped out. She had on her husband's camouflage shirt. It was long, hanging down to the tops of her thighs. It still fit snug around her chest but only a tiny bit.

"See, I told you it was my nightgown."

Mac opened his eyes, he did a double take. His eyes growing a little wide. "Now how come I never looked that good in that uniform?"

Gill climbed onto the bed. "As you said, I have boobs." She crawled over to her husband and straddled his waist. "So can I keep the shirt or not?"

MacGyver shook his head. "Sorry Sweets, it's mine." He put his arms around his wife's waist.

Gillian pouted. "But I thought we split everything 50, 50. Isn't marriage a 50 50 deal?"

"Okay so the shirt is half mine."

This made his wife grin. "Now the question put before you Specialist MacGyver is… which half do you want? Bottom half or top half?"

Mac moved his head a little from side to side. "Hmmm that's a tough call. I have to do some thinking."

His hands came back from around her to touch the top button. He opened it. "Well there are a lot of options to consider." Another button came open. "There's the good points and bad points of both halves." The third button came open; it was the one that sat in the middle of his wife's chest. He pulled apart the two ends and grinned. "I think I've made my decision."

Gillian was looking down, watching him. She lifted his head. "Really? And what did you decide?" He opened the shirt the rest of the way and slid it down his wife's arms. "I want both halves." He tossed the shirt into his footlocker and pulled his wife into his arms. He kissed her, his hands sliding down her back.

Gillian sighed, hugging her husband around his neck. She was running her fingers through his hair; she put both hands on either side of his head. She tilted it back and covered his face with small kisses.

MacGyver closed his eyes. "This has been-"

Gillian put her fingers to his lips, stopping him in mid sentence. Mac opened his eyes and looked at her. The young woman shook her head. "No, don't talk. You've done enough of that tonight. Right now all I want you to do is feel." She took her fingers from his lips and kissed them. "Can you do that?"

Mac nodded his head; his wife gave him a smile before once again covering his mouth with hers. She scooted back, sliding down his long legs. Her fingers found the end of his t-shirt and she lifted it up.

The young woman saw a small faint line; it was just above his belly button. She had seen it a thousand times before but had never asked about it.

"Is that where he got you?"

MacGyver was watching his wife, he nodded. Gillian touched the small straight line with her fingers. She leaned down and kissed it gently.

Mac could feel his heart speed up at the simple gesture. He reached down and touched his wife upper arms. He moved her up along his body and kissed her, holding her tightly to him as he did so.

MacGyver kissed the young woman until she was winded.

Gillian grabbed his t-shirt and pulled it up over his head. She leaned her cheek on his bare chest, the feel of his skin and the strong pounding of his heart intoxicated the young woman. She kissed him again, her mouth moving against his as her hand touched the waistband of his sweats and started to pull them down.

"This has been the worst day of my life."

Mac finally got to say what he wanted to earlier. He had his head on his wife's shoulder; she was gently stroking his hair and face. The couple was lying together in the middle of the bed.

Gillian took a deep breath and let it out slowly. "I know it has but now you're free of all that pain and guilt."

"The guilt especially has been a big influence in my life. It drove me to do a lot of things I might not have done otherwise."

Gillian looked down at her husband. "A lot of good things Mac. It was more than the guilt, you have a good heart and you like to help people. You've always been like that, way before you went to Nam."

MacGyver lifted his head. "I swore I've never had anything to do with guns or violence again. We shipped out a week after it happened; the war was over a month later." He swallowed hard, shaking his head slightly. "I went home, went back to school and pretended it didn't even happen. I never told a soul, not my mother, not even Harry."

Gillian put her hand on her husband's cheek. "It was dormant inside of you for 20 years, and it probably would have stayed in there forever if it hadn't been for the reunion."

Mac nodded slowly. "You started asking questions I wasn't prepared to answer. I just kept telling myself that if you found out our marriage was over."

The young woman shook her head slowly. "You know you bowled me over when you said that in the office? I got so upset, Pete kept telling me to calm down. I just couldn't believe you would think that." She was gazing at her husband, a serious look on her face. "In a little over two months we're going to have our second anniversary. We've been through a lot in those two years, some good things and some not so good. But I have absolutely no regrets, marrying you was the smartest thing I've ever done." She gave her husband a smile. "Would you believe me if I said that even after all this time you still make me crazy?"

MacGyver grinned; he touched his forehead to his wife's. "I believe you and the feeling is more than mutual."

Gillian laughed. "Now I think I'm ready to go to sleep. I don't know about you but I'm pooped."

"Me too." He sighed contently. "I was pretty tired before, now I'm exhausted."

The young woman grinned. "Hmmm I wonder why? Could it be because you ravaged me? Twice?"

Mac moved back and looked at his wife. "Hey! It was your idea."

"The first time yeah, I figured you needed a little affection after the night you've had. But the second time was your idea."

MacGyver shrugged his shoulders. "Okay so maybe I haven't really changed in 20 years."

"Nope, still young and horny."

"I don't hear you complaining."

"And you won't either." Gillian rolled over and turned off her lamp, the room going dark. "Time to go to sleep Squeaks."

Mac sat up and grabbed the sheet and the covers. He pulled them up, as he once again leaned his head against his wife's shoulder. "I hope I don't have any more bad dreams."

Gillian put her arms around her husband and moved him so he was against her chest. She kissed his head and stroked his face gently. "You won't, just remember that you're here with me, warm and safe."

MacGyver sighed, his eyes beginning to feel heavy. "I hope you're right."

"Go to sleep, I'll stay awake for a while and keep an eye on you, okay?"

"Uh huh."

Gillian shook her head; she could tell her husband was practically asleep already. She held him a little tighter to her, listening to his deep even breathing.

MacGyver was standing in front of his dresser mirror. He had on a pair of black dress pants and a white long sleeved dress shirt; he was looping his tie around itself. He finished and tightened the tie a tiny bit more around his neck. The tie was a medium blue with swirls made up of lighter shades of blue on it.

"Gill, can you come here a second and see if this looks okay?" He called out to his wife who was in the bathroom.   

Gillian stepped out of the open door in a maroon towel. She had another one around her head. "Let me see."

Mac raised an eyebrow. "Now I'm no fashion expert but I don't think you should wear a towel to the reunion." He looked her up and down. "Although I doubt my friends would object."

The young woman made a face at her husband. "Oh ha ha, I just got out of the shower." She loosened his tie and adjusted it. "You know, you shouldn't make wise cracks at the person fixing your tie. She might accidentally strangle you with it." She pulled his tie back up against his neck and put her hands on his chest. "There." She gave her husband a smile. "You look very handsome."

"Thanks." MacGyver turned back to the mirror and fixed his belt a little.

Gillian took the towel off her head. "Don't worry Mac, tonight is going to be a fun evening, you'll see."

"Tell that to my stomach."

Gillian opened her closet and stepped into it. "Butterflies?"

MacGyver shook his head. "Pterodactyls."

The young woman poked her head out and looked at her husband. "Honey, relax. It's going to be all right. There's no need for you to have flying dinosaurs in your stomach, okay?"

"I'll try." Mac checked his watch, it was 6 10. "We have to go in 20 minutes Gill."

Gillian came back out with a dress. "I know, don't worry I'll be beautiful in 10 minutes."

Her husband couldn't help but smile. He walked over to her and put his hands on her shoulders. "You're beautiful now." He gave her a kiss on the cheek.

"Smooth talker."

"I only speak the truth. " Mac gave his wife a light swat on the behind. "Now hustle."

"I'm hustling." Gillian opened her dresser drawer and started pulling out underclothes and pantyhose.

MacGyver and Gillian were walking through the lobby of the Woodsmen. The motif of the hotel lived up to its name. It was like walking through an enormous log cabin. The walls and ceiling were all made of long reddish brown logs. There were replicas of rifles, and pistols along with animal pelts and a few stuff heads hanging all over the walls around a stone fireplace.

Gillian was beside her husband, he was holding her hand. Her dress was dark blue silk; it had a V-neck design in the front; it went to her knees and was backless.  She had decided to leave her hair down, but had pulled it back away from her face. The young woman looked around at the decor. "Charming, why do I feel like I'm going to hear a pack of hunting dogs howl any minute now?"

"Considering where we are, I wouldn't be surprised if you did."

MacGyver stopped in front of a pair of double doors marked BANQUET ROOM. "Well this is it." He took a deep breath and let it out slowly.

Gillian could see how nervous her husband was. She gave his hand a squeeze. "Go on, open the door."

Mac turned and looked at his wife. She nodded her head, a small smile forming on her painted lips. He reached out and touched the door knob, closing his eyes briefly as he turned it and opened the door.

There were four guys sitting around the center table, they all were dressed up in dress shirts and ties. The door opened and they all turned to see who came in. It only took a second for them to recognize who it was; the four men got on their feet and headed over to the door.

"Well I'll be damned! Squeaks!" Garner still had his black hair; there were a few hints of grey in it; that was the only change to him.

MacGyver smiled widely as he let go of his wife's hand. "Hey Garner."

The black haired man hugged him hard, picking him up a little as he did so. "Christ on a cookie Mac you're still a kid!"

"Hardly." Mac patted his friend on the back. "How have you been?"

Garner let go of him. "Good, really good."

Pulaski was still tall and mean looking. The only thing the past two decades have given him was a slight belly and his blond hair was thinner. He hugged his friend, patting his back. "Hey Squeaks, good to see you."

"You too Pulaski."

A balding man in glasses stood up and smiled at MacGyver. "Hey Mac, glad you came."

The two men shook hands and gave each other a quick hug. "Yeah so am I Wyler."

Nickels was the last one to greet MacGyver. He still had his strawberry hair; it was thinner now, mixed in with thick patches of grey hair. "It's been a long time Squeaks."

"Yeah it has." Mac stepped back and looked at Gillian. He stretched out his hand to her. The men saw her and started whistling, this only made the young woman blush as she accepted her husband's hand.

"Echoes, this is Gillian, my wife."

Garner took Gillian's hand and shook it. "Mike Garner, nice to meet you."

Gillian smiled at him. "Same here Garner."

Mac started pointing. "The big blond guy is Pulaski, the one with glasses is Wyler, and the Howdy- Doody look-a-like is Nickels."

The young woman smiled and nodded at the four men. "Nice to meet all of you." She noticed she was the only woman in the room. "So I take it no other wives are coming?"

Pulaski shook his head. "No, Shirley's coming but her and her daughter Becky won't be here 'til 9." The tall blond looked around at all the men. "Echoes, have a seat and let the party begin."

MacGyver had a sip of his ice tea; he pushed his empty plate aside and looked the man sitting next to him. "So Garner, what have you been doing since the war ended in '73?"

The black haired man wiped his mouth with a napkin as he finished his dinner. "I'm a software engineer. I work for a place called Helping Hand Incorporation."

Mac smiled. "And what kind of software do you design?"

"I specialize in software that helps the blind. It reads to them what's on the screen and what keys their typing."

"Sounds good."

Nickels took out a silver cigarette case and opened it. "Anyone care for one?"

The request was turned down and the red haired man took one out and lit it. He blew the smoke out. "That sounds interesting Garner. I myself am into construction, got my own business."

MacGyver nodded. "I did a little construction here and there."

Gillian had a sip of her tea. "Mac you've done a little bit of everything."

Pulaski snickered and shook his head as he leaned back in his chair. "You into construction Mac? You don't seem strong enough, you're still pretty scrawny."

Gillian looked across the table at the older man. "Excuse me Ski but I'll have you know my husband is not scrawny, not by any means. In fact, he's built rather well." She turned beside her to her husband and gave him a wink.

Mac felt his face flush and he cleared his throat. "So what do you do Ski?"

"Professor, Military History, UCSB. I enlighten young minds."

"You mean corrupt young minds." Wyler poured himself another beer. "But I'm not surprised; you always did act like you knew it all when we were over there."

MacGyver's face finally returned to its normal hue. "How about you Nickels?"

The red haired man turned his head and blew out a trail of smoke. "Social worker, County of Los Angeles. I help young mothers and pregnant teens and put kids in loving foster homes."

Gillian was listening to all of the men; they had all done well for themselves. There were a lot of Veterans of Viet Nam that weren't so fortunate. She glanced at her husband; she couldn't help but notice the small smile on his face. He looked rather pleased and she was glad.

Garner took a roll out of the basket in the center of the table. He sat down in his chair and shifted. He creased his brow as he reached into his pocket and felt something. His eyes suddenly lit up. "Oh yeah!" He turned to his friend that was a few chairs down. "Hey Nickels, got something for ya."

Nickels was crushing out his cigarette in a glass ashtray. "Oh you do huh? And just what might that be."

The black haired man turned his back partially to the crowd. They all heard a faint cracking sound and watched as Garner shook up something. He turned back around and tossed it at his friend.

Nickels caught it and his expression turned sour. "Oh very funny!" He showed everyone a glow stick, its bright green glow reflecting on the shining wooden table.

The assembled men all looked at it and started laughing. Gillian's eyebrows rose as she looked at the chuckling men. "Um…anyone care to tell me why a glow stick is so amusing?"

Garner shook his head. "Why don't you ask your husband that?"

MacGyver sighed as his wife's gaze focused on him. "Well Gill, let's just say that Nickels had a problem staying awake all night whenever it was his turn for guard duty."

Pulaski nodded. "So MacGyver gets this brilliant idea on how to keep him awake."

"Involving glow sticks?"

MacGyver stood up and reached across the table. He picked it up and showed it to his wife. "See Gill, the glow stick is filled with a chemical called ester. Inside the tube is a little glass capsule filled with hydrogen peroxide. When you bend the glow stick the glass capsule breaks, by shaking it up you mix the peroxide and the ester together and that's what makes it glow." He glanced at Nickels. "If you cut open a glow stick after its been broken, you can get the liquid of it and do anything you want with it."

Wyler started to laugh. "Yeah like paint yourself with it to scare a certain sleeping guard."

Gillian gasped and covered her mouth with her hand. "Oh you didn't."

Garner nodded. "Yeah we sure did. We all got a hold of a half dozen of these glow sticks and waited until it was Nickels turn again at guard duty. We cut them open and painted our arms, our hands, our faces." He motioned to Mac. "Your husband even put some of it on his teeth. Anyways we all put on our rain ponchos and hid in the jungle just waiting for it to get late enough for Nickels to take his usual nap." He started laughing and waited until it stopped before going on. "So here's five guys all painted up like freaks with these camouflage rain ponchos on. It's about two am and sure enough, ole Nickels is sound asleep. We all very quietly snuck up on him and tapped him on his shoulder, hiding our faces. He woke up and saw all of these camouflaged figures. We all uncovered our faces and yelled BOO!" He started laughing again. "Nickels sees all of these glowing freaks and Mac grins at him with his glowing teeth. He pulled out his side arm and started shooting. The five of us never ran for cover so fast in our lives! Nickels was all wide-eyed and firing away!"

The men all burst into laughter again; Nickels face was as red as his hair. "I should have shot you bastards for that!"

MacGyver finally stopped laughing and wiped his eyes. "You almost did!"

The doors opened up and everyone turned to see a middle aged African American woman walk into the room. She was slim of build and a little on the tall side. Her eyes were large and dark and there was a kindness in them that only accentuated her lovely face. She had her hair put up in a twist behind her head and a small black purse in her right hand. She had on a black sleeveless dress; it had spaghetti straps that were made of rhinestones.  Beside her was a cute little girl in a red velvet dress, the five year old saw all the men and moved closer to her mother's leg. The mother smiled as she looked down at her daughter. "It's all right Becky; these men were all friends of your father's." She lifted her eyes to all of them. "Good evening."

"Shirley…" Mac was on his feet; a large smile on his face as he walked over to the door; he hugged his friend's widow.

Shirley let go of her daughter and hugged MacGyver. "I'm so glad you made it MacGyver."

"Yeah, me too." He let go of her and crouched down to see the little girl. She was the spitting image of Charlie. Becky had the same piercing eyes and smile as her father. "Hi Becky, you probably don't remember me. I haven't seen you since you were a baby."

Becky looked at the blond man and nodded. "You were in a picture with my Daddy." She hugged Mac around the neck.

MacGyver held the little girl and kissed her head. "You've gotten so big."

Shirley smiled proudly. "She's five now, and going to Kindergarten."

Mac straightened up and looked over at Gillian. "Shirley I want you to meet someone."

Gillian got up and went over to stand beside her husband; he put his arm around her. "Shirley Robinson this is my wife Gillian."

Shirley's smile got even wider as she stuck out her hand. "I'm very happy to meet you."

Gillian took the woman's hand and shook it. "Me too Shirley, I've heard a lot about you." She saw the young girl and smiled at her. "And you must be Becky."

The five year old nodded. "Hi."

Mac put his arm around Shirley's shoulders. "Come join us Shirley we were just reminiscing."

The party broke up around midnight; everyone said their goodbyes and promised to keep in touch with one another. The only ones left in the room were MacGyver, Gillian, Shirley and Becky. They were enjoying hot chocolate and dessert.

Gillian set her cup down and stood up. "If you all will excuse me, I need the ladies room." She bent down and kissed her husband on the cheek. "I'll be right back."

MacGyver nodded. "Okay."

Shirley watched the young woman leave, she was glad to have a private moment with her friend. "She's nice, when did you get married?"

"It'll be two years at the end of March."

"Oh still newlyweds." Shirley had a sip of her hot chocolate. She saw the pensive look on her friend's face. "You still miss him, don't you?"

Mac looked at his friend's widow. "Yeah I do, a lot."

"So do I, but at least I have Becky. It may not be much but she's still part of him."

"I just wish she could have known him."

"She does know him." Shirley reached out and touched her friend's hand. "Mac, I'm glad you're here. I know coming here probably wasn't easy."

MacGyver laughed a little. "If you only knew how hard."

"I think I do." She gave his hand a squeeze. "I know what happened to you there, Charlie told me."

"I figured he did, why else would you be so insistent that I come to the reunion."

Shirley smiled and shook her head. "I guess that was pretty easy to see through, but I wanted you to see for yourself that you did the right thing. Those guys have very full lives, and so do I. I wouldn't have gotten to know Charlie at all or have his daughter if it hadn't been for you. I figured it was time to put the past behind you."

Mac's face bloomed into a smile. "I am, coming here tonight was the right thing to do. I had my doubts at first but now I'm glad I did."

Gillian came back into the room. "Mac, the manager just informed me that they close up everything in 10 minutes. We have to leave."

Shirley and MacGyver both stood up. "Well it's getting late anyways."

"Right, I have a little one to put to bed."

MacGyver and Shirley walked to the door, they both hugged. "See you later Mac, you take care of yourself."

"I will."

Shirley hugged Gillian. "It was nice to meet you Gill."

"You to Shirley."

Shirley let go of her friend's wife and took her daughter's hand. "Good night."

The couple watched as Shirley and her daughter left the hotel. Gillian leaned against her husband. "Ready to go home Mac?"

MacGyver put his arm around her waist. "Yeah, I think I am."

"Me too." Gillian took her husband's hand and together they walked through the lobby.

"So what do you want to do when we get home?"

Mac shrugged. "Oh I don't know, we can curl up in bed and watch Clint Eastwood."

Gillian nodded. "Sounds good, tomorrow's Saturday you know, what are we going to do?"

"I know one thing we can do."

"Oh yeah? What's that?"

"I still need a new alarm clock."

Gillian stopped walking and looked at her husband. "We can use mine."

Mac shook his head. "No way!"

"Why not?"

The blond man smiled widely at his wife. "Simple… I want my own time."

Gillian rested her head against her husband's chest. She thought about something her husband had said the night he had finally told his secret. He had told her how guilt had forced him do things he might not have done. His statement about wanting his own time made sense. He had been living for others and not really for himself, but those days were over now. Now he was finally free to live for himself.  "If that's what you want Baby, you got it. After 20 years, I say you've earned it."

MacGyver touched his head to his wife's. "So do I."

The couple walked out of the hotel and headed for the Corvette.

.