A/N: I do not own Tekken, Bandai/Namco does.

Ah yes, when bombs start to drop and a member of the Mishima Bloodline starts to go insane, you know that another King of the Iron Fist Tournament is coming. There's been five so far and this latest announcement would make it six. Six tournaments who strangely enough only managed to attain more fighters than lose some to the passage of time, but we don't like to question what the higher up is thinking for the great god Au-Thor knows all. I am very close to a god though, might attain it soon enough when I can CONTROL MY DAMN BODY!!!

Yes, thats right, Jin Kazama, head exec. of the Mishima Zaibatsu was stuck in a deep cell inside of his own body, and the worst part? Definitely the view. Jin knew the devil inside him always liked fashion magazines for some strange reason and now that his hair is completely in his eyes, he knows why. At least the devil had a sixth sense that he used instead of sight, or his image of tough, no joke manager would go down the drain like he almost did the stairs a couple of seconds ago.

"Damnit, could you at least get this hair out of my eyes, its really frustrating not being able to see anything out there. I long for any color that isn't jet black right about now." Jin mentally told the Devil.

"I see," the devil responded, pausing to let his pun sink in. Jin would have punched him in the face, but that would result in several stares and a self-inflicted broken nose. He definitely couldn't have that with the new tournament coming up, what would Xiaoyu think of him then? The devil complied to Jin's request which led to a small happy dance in the deep recesses of the aforementioned fighter's head, at least that's what he thought.

"Master Kazama, may I be allowed to ask why you are currently dancing on the dinner table?" an elderly butler looked up at Jin with a stoic face. His twitching eyebrow betraying his exterior.

"Uh," Jin stood on the table for a couple more seconds before replying, "I believe we should hold a gala before the tournament." Good cover wait.....shit.

"Do you believe thats a good idea sir, over 40 fighters gathered in one room. Remember most of them are here for the prize money on your head."

"That's only a slight problem Woolsworth, if we get all the fighters here, then maybe I can see how tough the competition is going to be."

"For one my name isn't Woolsworth, and two; there are proffesionally trained assasins, a cybernetic ninja, a two lunatics with jaguar masks who probably use steroids, robots, and not to mention two generations of Mishima who desperately want to eat chilled Jin brains for the main course."

"Never fear Walter, I have a couple aces of my sleeve," Jin tried to do his best knowing smile which somehow turned into the copyrighted Hannibal-Lecter grin. Somewhere in the world, Anthony Hopkins felt a sense of pride swell in his chest.

"Please for the love of the great god Au-Thor, never do that again. Also my name isn't Walter either, we have giant name tags with twenty font because Heihachi was experiencing early onset Alzheimers from all those beatings he took in the last five tournaments."

"I don't mull over petty matters such as this Watson. I have a gala to plan and I still have to pick out my clothes, which reminds me. On the back of the box it does say something about fully customizable characters does it not?"

"All I see is this girl's codec number, and- Wait! No Jin, you are not going to tell those poor people what they have to wear, knowing your sick head you're going to make Xiaoyu come in that School uniform and have Baek bring that damn cat of his, no. And if I see King in a speedo, I swear to Au-Thor I will kill you!"

"KAZAMA WANTS CUSTOMIZABLE CHARACTERS!" Jin stamped his food on the dining room table causing it to shatter while Jin fell flat on his back looking up at his company with a pout.

"Ugh, dealing with Mishimas is like taking care of a five year old, I swear. Fine, you can tell them what to wear but nothing too perverted or my partnership with you is finished."

"Hmm, well I have to get on that right away if I want to get all of them done by October 27th. Would you mind helping me Wallace?"

"For the love of!!!Ok calm down, deep breaths. For one; I am not a man, I'm a woman, and two; I'm Nina WILLIAMS, you're hired assassin and personal body guard. The butler you were talking to replaced himself with this Mokujin you see standing next to me." Jin looked to the right of Nina and saw the Mokujin looking quite enthused for a block of wood.

"Well that was unexpected," Jin said to himself while still on his back, "But now I'm hungry. KAZAMA WANTS FOOD!!!"

Nina could only sigh at this. She once respected the man but there was something about the Zaibatsu. Not only did the person running it turn into a tyrannical leader who only wanted more power, but it seemed that the leader must also be quite insane in order for the company to function properly. She had reports of the last time the Zaibatsu was run by a very sane family man who was as honest as that one American president with the top hat. It turned out that the company not only went through bankruptcy but the soldiers all went to mental facilities for varying psychological disorders. Note that this all happened in one day as that was how long Heihachi had left on vacation.

"Okay, what does Kazama want to eat?" Nina sighed out. She had to go through this every single day. She might feel guilty for never being a mother to Steve, but if this is what it would have been like, she would have probably hired her sister to kill him.

"KAZAMA WANTS A HAPPY MEAL!!!"

"Okay, we'll go get you a happy meal," with this Nina took Jin's hand and led him to the personal helicopter they would take to the nearest McDonalds in Japan.

A/N: Okay another Tekken parody fic. This one is going to be a parody of Tekken 6 even though I have yet to get my hands on it and it has not been released in America yet. Until then Jin won't act like he's five all the time, I just needed some humor to come from him in this prologue chapter since a lot of the humor later will probably come from King. King is often neglected in most fanfics because his story is too standalone which is why I'm using a parody in order to put him as an important character in a Xiaoyin fic. Also, I love Tekken because I cannot find a character that I absolutely hate like in other fighting games, so I am not bashing anyone, only using them for humor. Tell me if you like this idea or if its too overdone for me to stick my nose into. Also to whoever came up with the "Great God Au-Thor" thing, I don't know who you are so if you're offended by this tell me.