A/N: Alright guys this is a new story (sort of). I decided to put this up again after some changes and yes, previous fans of Insecure, here you have it! And if you have any questions for me or any constructive criticism, you can email me at danceinfinitize and yes, please check out my blog .sg thanks!

Insecure

Chapter 1: Shock

BPOV

I sat there in shock, trying to absorb what I had just been told. My mother was dead. The doctors had said sorry and my family said it was fate.

"Bella, get up." Dr Black says to me.

Only after he said that, my fogged mind registered the white and pristine walls and the sanitary smell. Wheelchairs and people whizzed past me and yet the scene seemed unfamiliar and foreign. I struggled to get up from the floor. As warm and strong hands tried to lift me up, I slipped into the darkness.

*Insecure*

"I know Billy but couldn't you have just told me and not her? She just got herself admitted into the hospital after the news! I know you mean well but you know how frail Bella is. I don't think I can take it if –" Charlie's voice broke.

I could faintly hear Billy – Dr Black. Billy was Charlie's best friend and they both loved to fish at nearby lakes.

"It's alright, she'll be fine" Billy said to my father.

I opened my lids that seemed to weigh about as light as the earth and the bright lights flooded into my eyes. I felt a dull throbbing at the back of my head. I reached up my head and felt something soft but rough. Struggling to adjust, I took in my surroundings. My bed, a small bedside table, another table and my father and Billy on the small couch in my room.

Charlie caught my eye and quickly rushed over.

"Bella! Are you alright? Billy told me you hit the floor quite hard and then you started bleeding after you fainted." Char-Dad says to me.

"Yeah pops I'm ok." I said.

Oh that explains the bandage then. I just wanted to get out of this hospital quick. Billy switched into professional mode. After quizzing me about the year, date and what was my name, he left the room after instructing me to rest.

"Bella, I know that, um," Charlie cleared his throat. "your mother has – ".

"no." I said silently but forcefully with as much strength I could muster, tears welling up in my eyes.

Did Charlie refer to Renee as my mother and not someone he knew? He spoke as if he did not know Renee and was Charlie that tactless? Excuse me I just hurt my head because of that and you expect me to be able to talk about it? Please.

I felt so sad. My mother, who had single-handedly raised me up after divorcing Charlie and bringing me along back to Phoenix. My mother, who had signed me up for my first ballet and piano lessons despite my terrible failures at those. My mother, who liked to have fun picnics with me, like alphabet themed or colour theme or ingredient theme. My mother, who I shared my secrets with. It was like I had lost a part of me.

I started crying then. My walls crumbled as I sobbed. I would never see my mother again. I remembered when I left Phoenix to come to Forks, I saw this wig at my mother's mahogany dresser. When I asked her about it, she said it was a prop used for her upcoming play at the theatre and she brought it home to wash it.

My mom is, yeah you guessed it, the famous Renee Dwyer. A once-Hollywood actress. She switched to local plays after giving birth to me. There at our local theatre, she found more joy in performing there. No paparazzi, no crazy fans every time you walk on the streets. She was happy here. She slowly faded from the scene after she left Hollywood.

Now I know why that wig was there. She had cancer – breast cancer, stage 4 – it ran through her family. Grammie – as I called Renee's mother – had also died from breast cancer when I was 10. Grammie, tick. Renee, tick. Bella, blank. I was probably the next person on the list to die from it.

I was in Phoenix now, I realized. Charlie and Billy had flown over with me. We flew over here to say hi to my mom. Now, it was to say bye. I didn't even get a chance to say goodbye to her actually. It hurt me and I was so disappointed with myself that I did not say goodbye to her!

"Here, Bells, take this." Charlie stuffed some Kleenex into my hands. Blowing out my nose, the nurse entered the room.

"Hey! So how are you doing? I sense a very emotional moment here!" she giggled.

"Hi, I'm Alice, I will be your nurse for the duration of your stay." I smiled a water smile at her.

"Bella." I said.

"My brother, a doctor here will be here soon to check on you." Alice says.

And with that she gracefully sashayed out of the room. She really knew how to lighten the mood but I was still wallowed in my grief.

My mind wandered to my memories as the doctor stepped in.

Flashback

"Bella! Get back here!" my mother yelled.

We were at the beach, having a picnic. I was splashing about in the water as my mother laid out the mats and the food. We had forgotten to bring out swimsuits and I had just gotten myself all wet.

Running back to her, a warm towel enveloped me as my mother, made the towel like a mini curtain between two close palm trees, and changed my wet clothes to warm, dry ones.

"Mom! It's a beach!" I said, horrified.

Laughing, she said "It's okay, there's nobody here!"

I looked around and right smack in the middle of my vision, there was a family of four. The siblings were having fun with each other. Despite my young age at that time, once I saw their parents I immediately envied them. I only had a mom. I had a dad, but I haven't seen him ever since I was three.

One of the kids fell and started crying. The father quickly rushed up to the child and helped him up and back to their picnic mat. Once they arrived, the mother quickly attended to her wound as the father tried to console the child.

I looked back at my mom, angry that she lied to me.

"There's a family there! You lied to me!" I huffed.

Renee pretended to be remorseful and said "Princess Bella, I'm sorry I lied to you. I shall give you some of your favourite mashed potatoes as a gift!" as she gave me a curtsey.

I laughed then, running towards our picnic mat under the shady trees and immediately devoured the homemade mashed potatoes.

-end of flashback-

As my memory ended, like a film, I could hear the soft humming of voices. A gruff voice which belonged to my father and then there was this soft, musical voice that I could not place. Trying to clear my mind, I blinked my eyes as my eyes landed on the figure. I gasped once I saw the doctor.

He was, literally, the man of my dreams.