Here I am again! :D
Ok, this time it's about Hiroyuki and Miwako, and I want to dedicate this fic to a friend of mine who totally love these 2, Matsumoto Miwako-chan. I've put a little bit of a BEAUTIFUL song and I swear that whenever I listen to it, I remember these 2. The song's called In My Arms, by Plumb.
So, hope you like it and forgive me if it has some mistakes; I've done my very best and I'd love to know your opinion!
Enjoy,
Neffer-Tari
SECRET
"Your curley cues,
your contageous smile…
And as I watch
you start to grow up.
All I can do is hold you tight
knowing clouds will raise up and
storms will race in"
.
Three it's a fair number. When two people collide, there is a third person to give them support and help them solve the problem. The presence of this person turns happier every game or conversation and increase a certain kind of feelings, like protection and power. There will always exist someone who's better on some issues than the other two and, helping each other, no one will be left behind.
Three it's an excellent number, when we are just children.
But, when we fall in love with tow people, and have equal feelings for each other, which one do we chose? The one who seduces us or the other, who protect us? Well, probably both seduces as much as give protection. So, which one will we kiss first, since we can't kiss two people at the same time? Which one of these people, who have exactly the same spaces in our heart, will be the most indicated? It's impossible make a decision like this without feeling any kind of regret.
That's why we chose the one who gave the first step.
That's why she stayed with him.
I don't blame those two… well, at least I don't blame Miwako. In fact, I learnt a lot with what has passed and accept it like the natural order of things. Arashi was the one who had the courage to give the first step. He didn't worry about stick a knife in the back of his best friend, didn't remember what was ethic, didn't bother with simple questions like "What do you really want Miwako?" and didn't even answer when that little defenceless girl said "Stop it".
If this is love, then I don't love. If I had to do all these things just to stay with her, I wouldn't do it. Does it show that I don't love her as much as he does? Well, probably I don't.
To me, Miwako is a beautiful and fragile angel. I love those lips and her attitudes are truly sweet, only thinking about the others. Her kind eyes and that curly pink hair just make her even more special, even more unique. She's someone I respect and desperately need to protect, no matter what happens and what it takes. Her space and wills should have been respected and no one had the right to force her, especially Arashi.
He knows what I think and he knows what I do.
Even today I follow her steps patiently, silently, hiding with discretion in the shadows. When that beloved little woman gets sick, I'm the one who gives those expensive medicines to her boyfriend in secret. I take care of her with love and do whatever I can.
Do I care if she doesn't know that I'm always by her side?
No, if she's happy with him, that's enough.
Do I feel uncomfortable when I see those two together?
No, I don't.
Does it hurt me when I see that broken smile asking me incessantly, in an agonizing delirium, what would have happened if that afternoon had never existed?
Yes, it hurts. It hurts too much.
.
"Story books full of fairy tales,
kings and queens and the bluest skies.
My heart is torn just in knowing
you'll someday see the truth from lies"
.
Hiro-kun is getting married in three miserable days. I'll never confess that, for all these years, Miwako's feelings have only increased. I know that, despite Arashi's hard work, he couldn't fill with his love Hiru-kun's little powerful place in Miwako's heart.
And he never will.
I can't avoid thinking in what we could have been and, every time I do that, those stupid salty tears start to run down my face really fast. Miwako instinctively grabs her sweet bottle full of sugar that surely will wipe away her tears.
Both of them gave it to me, but I still thinking only in him…
He's a doctor because of Miwako, but he didn't have to do that just to see her happy. It would have been enough look deep down those sweet and broken brown eyes. It's enough touch that dark hair full of temptation and hold in my arms his beautiful face…
It makes me cry harder.
You know what? Miwako really believed we would always stay together, the three of us. I never wanted to abandon him, never, never, never, never!… If I did that awful thing, it was because I'm a little coward…
But, if I had gone with Hiro-kun, what would have happened to Arashi? Who would have taken care of that rebellious and inconsequent spirit? Would have been there someone to wipe away his tears?
No.
So I'll be there that day with a huge happy sweet smile, because Hiro-kun will get married with Caroline. Miwako knows that Hiro-kun's heart is broken, that Caroline's heart is broken, that even my heart is turning apart… but I need to take care of Arashi, at least this time, to avoid break his heart. The only heart which is still intact.
I've made the mistake of abandon Hiro-kun once, so now I won't let my blondie escape. Miwako will try once again and give her best, just like Hiro-kun will do with Caroline. He will comfort her to forget about his own sadness…
And that will just increase our connection, getting us even closer, hiding our true feelings behind two people we hope can help us to forget…
Though Miwako knows… it will never happen…
.
"Castles, they might crumble.
Dreams may not come true
but you are never all alone,
because I will always…
always love you"
.
The End