The first time she hears the song, is when she's a few hours old- seven to be exact. As the new- and very young- mother sits in her hospital bed, clutching the pink bundle to her chest, she hums the sweet tune and begins to sing.
"The other night dear, as I lay sleeping. I dreamed I held you in my arms, but when I awoke, dear, I was mistaken. So I hung my head and I cried.."
The newborn yawned and stretched her little chubby arms up and pulled them inward to her chest. The mother smiled, as a tear rolled down her cheek.
"You are my sunshine, my only sunshine. You make me happy when skies are gray. You'll never know dear, how much I love you. Please don't take my sunshine away."
She the places a small kiss onto the newborns head and smiles, "My baby Rose. You are my little sunshine, darling.."
She's five when a nightmare rips her out of a peaceful slumber, her screams echoing through the flat in London.
"MUMMY!" she screams into the darkness.
It's pounding footsteps and the bedroom door swinging open, when Mother comes in.
"Oh darling! What's wrong?" she asks, making her way over to the small bed in the middle of the room.
"Mummy, they took you away!" Rose cries, as her mother takes her into her arms.
"I'm right here darling. No one will ever take me away!" she insists, as she cries. "Now how about I sing you a song and you try to sleep again? Hmm?" she asks.
Rose nods and settles against her mothers side as she beings the familiar tune.
"You are my sunshine, my only sunshine. You make me happy when skies are gray…"
As she drifts off into dreamland, her mother pushes the damp curls away from her forehead and holds her tightly.
"Please don't take my sunshine away.."
It's the last time her mother sings the song to her.
She's seventeen and she's lived thirteen years of being a rebellious teenager. Living with her grandmother has turned her into a monster- drinking, smoking and bad behavior. She doesn't care if her grandmother is friends with well-known politicians and a lower-class royalty figure to her group of judgmental friends. To Rose, she's the woman who kicked her mother out onto the streets when she became pregnant by a stationed Starfleet engineer, who left her with no money and no support for the child they produced.
"You're mother made a fool out of this family's name, Rose! And she goes off and gets herself killed! All so she can find that man who left her with a mistake and a tarnished reputation! And that ridiculous humming you do throughout the day! How can I find you a husband, when all you do is sit and daydream your life away. Those parties you and your low-life friends go to, and returning to MY home reeking like a barrel of ale. You're a disgrace, Rose! A DISGRACE!"
The next time she hears her lullaby, is when she's underneath a boy- whom she's only dated for four months. As he pushes in and out of her, she looks up at the cracked ceiling, numb from the entire experience. It's nothing like the movies or books she's sneaked off to view. It's not magical or life changing. It's just another moment in her fucked up life, which would further prove her grandmother's point of how screwed up she is. It's at that moment, when she feels anger towards her mother. For leaving her here alone in this horrible situation, with no one who cared or even noticed her.
"You told me once, dear, you really loved me. And no one else could come between. But now you've left me and love another; You have shattered all of my dreams.."
She's nineteen when she meets Jim, after running away from London with a few clothes and 6,000 American dollars in her pocket. It's a drastic decision she made on a whim, after a pen pal from grade school needed a roommate. It's one bag and a quick note to her grandmother's maid- Amelia- and she's gone. She finds herself in Iowa and thrust into an American lifestyle, living near farms and open land. A culture shock from the uptight society of London. Several months after her big move, she's attending a wedding with her roommate, when a drunken fool harasses her. It's a quick spit to the face and she's running, unaware of her surroundings because she's still new to the land of corn and wheat. She ends up at the Riverside shipyards, as the man chases her down.
He's grabbing her and trying to push her over the railing, when her hero comes to save the day.
"Get your hands off her!"
"Back off farm boy! This has nothing to do with you!"
Rose watches as the two men shout at each other, glancing every few minutes at the far drop from the platform. It's a quick lunge from the man who's come to rescue her, that she's climbs over the railing to keep out of the way. Rose stands in her pretty gown, that's partially ripped from the groping hands of her attacker, and watches as he's beaten bloody.
"Now get the fuck out of here! If I see you here again, you wont be walking away!" the blonde shouts, as the drunken fool stumbles away.
He then turns around and looks at her, "Are you okay?" he asks, making his way towards her.
Rose nods, "Yes.."
"Give me your hand. I'll pull you back over," he says, holding his hand out to her.
She takes it and he then smiles at her, "I'm Jim. Jim Kirk."
"Rose Harrington Conrad," she quickly recites, and he laughs.
"Awfully long name for a pretty girl like you," he chuckles and she laughs. "Come on.." he says softly, and she steps up onto the railing.
It's a windy night and the platform sways as she's climbing over, and Jim picks her up and carries her down the steps and doesn't put her down until they reach solid ground.
From that moment on, they become inseparable. Eventually, she moves into her own place and Jim crashes there from time to time. It's one lazy Sunday afternoon, and they're both out on the deck, watching the sun go down. Rose is humming the tune and Jim looks at her.
"Johnny Cash?"
Rose quickly turns to look at him, "What?"
He nods, "Johnny Cash. You know, "You are my sunshine, my only sunshine.." he sings, terribly off-key and it makes her giggle.
Then she's silent and looking back at the horizon, the fields of wheat blowing in the breeze.
"My Mother used to sing me that song.." she barely whispers, and the silence falls between them.
She's twenty-two and finishing her first year at the Academy and maintaining a secret relationship with a much older man. It's a rainy night, after a round of rough and heated sex, when Christopher sings the song quietly in the darkness.
"You are my sunshine, my only sunshine. You make me happy when skies are gray…"
She lays there quietly, with her back towards him, listening as he sings in the darkness. He doesn't realize that she's wide awake, as he sings to himself, as he pulls her into his arms, her bare back resting against his chest.
"In my dreams, dear, you seem to leave me. When I awake my poor heart pains. So when you come back and make me happy. I'll forgive you dear, I'll take all the blame."
Rose lets him hold her and doesn't make a sound, as she stares at the wall.
It's three days after she learns that she's pregnant, and she can't help but smile to herself as she puts the clean laundry away. For the first time in years she feels true happiness. It's a sunny day and she's off from school for a holiday. Placing the clean towels into the closet, she closes the door and leans against it. Placing her hands onto her belly, which is starting to take shape, she smiles.
"You are my sunshine, my only sunshine…"
Christopher comes home from a meeting and watches as she sings to her belly, a smile etched upon his face.
"You'll never know dear, how much I love you. Please don't take my sunshine away.."
After a critical attack by Klingon war-birds, Rose is slipping into a drug-induced slumber, as the pain rips through her body. She hears McCoy hollering for a hypo and Christine furiously cursing to herself, as someone holds her down. It's the fire running through her body, and then a cool rush that relaxes her.
As the lights dim out she can hear the voice next to her, singing a lullaby that she's known for years. It's off-key and she smiles softly, though it hurts to, as it sings to her.
""You are my sunshine, my only sunshine. You make me happy when skies are gray. You'll never know dear, how much I love you.. please don't take my sunshine away…"
As she drifts off, she dreams of the sunshine and of her mother. Of Jim and the child she lost. She dreams of her rays of sunshine, as if they'd never been taken away.
"Please don't take my sunshine away.."