It's been five years since I've slept and five long years since I've looked forward to anything. Nothing changes except my immediate surroundings and the endless selection of beautiful clothes I wear.
We moved to Winnipeg, Manitoba as soon as Carlisle could arrange it after the mess I left behind in Rochester five years ago. I accept responsibility for my actions, but I don't regret them.
I know I'm not God. I'm not a judge and jury. But, Royce King and his posse of rich low-lives deserved to die. They deserved to feel the pain I felt on that cold April night while they laughed in their drunken stupor. They deserved a taste of the loss I felt as they molested me in that filthy alley and left me for dead.
And, I thought that he loved me.
I believed he wanted the same things I did. My parents had raised me to run a home to perfection. I wanted to have pretty babies and push them in a fancy pram in the park with the other young mothers. I wanted to have interesting dinner parties for our friends and Royce's business associates. I wanted birthday parties for our children with ponies, clowns and maybe even a carousel.
I was wrong about what Royce wanted, and I've paid the price for it every day since.
"Rosalie dear, can I help you with anything?" Esme is so sweet and patient. She's everything I would have hoped to be if my life had worked out the way I had planned. Esme is one of the most unselfish people I've ever met and I use the word "people" loosely. Both she and her husband Carlisle are truly kind, genuine and selfless. It took some time, but I'm long past blaming him for turning me into the blood-craving vampire I've been since 1933, some 1,900 days ago.
He didn't wish to bring me any harm and he personally didn't want anything from me. He simply saw my transformation as an act of compassion. He couldn't bear the "waste" of my life and in an instant gave me immortality, leaving me forever suspended in the body of an ungrateful, but beautiful 18-year-old.
"No thank you. I'm almost finished," I said to Esme.
"I have a suitcase that might work better for you. Why don't I go and get it?" Esme offered.
"No, really; this is fine. I want to pack light. If I need anything, I can always buy it."
"Do you know where you're going?" Esme asked anxiously.
"I want to go to the new Shenandoah National Park in Virginia. I may even hike the Appalachian Trail. There are some resorts in the area that might be nice. You can't beat the wildlife there," I said cynically.
"Carlisle wouldn't mind if I joined you. He's been so busy at work. Just give me a day or two to prepare."
"No Esme, please. I want to spend some time by myself. For the past five years, I've not had a minute to myself. If I go out in public, one of you is with me to ensure that I control my thirst. If I'm at home, Edward can hear every thought in my head."
"But Rosalie honey, you'll be so lonely. I can't stand the thought of that," Esme pleaded.
I took her hand. She's been my mother, my sister and my friend through this difficult ordeal. "You're afraid that I won't come back. Don't be. I may be gone for a while, but I will return. I'll write to you and send postcards so that you have a general idea where I am. When I can, I'll call you. "
"You, Carlisle and Edward are all I have in this world. Nothing else exists for me," I said gently.
Esme turned away from me. I know that she is worried about what may come of me or what I might find. She went through this once before when Edward was gone for about 10 years. But, he returned intact with a renewed respect for Carlisle's position on our "human-free diet."
Carlisle had been by himself for nearly 300 years when he found Edward, who like me, was near death. Carlisle had been plagued by loneliness and had desperately wanted a companion. After he found Edward, he turned Esme. Once she had adjusted to her new life, she and Carlisle married.
Esme would miss female companionship and I hate myself for taking that from her. That very need was part of the reason Carlisle turned me. The rest of the reason was more complicated. Edward had just returned from his 10-year sabbatical and Carlisle wanted more than almost anything for Edward to stay and remain a part of his little family. He thought that if Edward wasn't by himself - if he had a mate - then he would be more content.
Contentment is just not a part of Edward's nature. He's an angsty loner who can be consumed for days by music and composition. My brother – as he's known in this part of Manitoba – is a truly talented musician. His emotional torment flows through his music allowing the listener to become engulfed by his pain and torture. His guilt over his nature and his perception of his lost soul are enough to drive anyone to depression. When I learned of Carlisle's plan for Edward and me, I believed at first that with some effort on my part I could make him happy.
At first, Edward's attitude really pissed me off. I had never met a man who was immune to my charms. Edward was always polite, but maintained a cool distance. He always treated me as a sister, never once giving me any indication that he wanted a more intimate relationship with me. Once I realized that, I abandoned all my efforts at seducing him, as his continued disinterest would only serve to make us all uncomfortable. And that could last for a very long time for us.
I abhore the idea of spending forever alone. My human parents had raised me to believe that I wasn't whole unless I had a man by my side. My personal value was determined by the wealth of my husband. I was groomed to be adored and showered with affection.
The way I see it, I don't have a plethora of options. Carlisle is undeniably taken. Edward is categorically unavailable. Clearly a human mate is not a choice. Although I am selfish, almost to a fault, I'm not willing to condemn someone to this life just to abate my loneliness. I wouldn't be able to change someone anyway - I've never even tasted human blood.
Carlisle says others like us do exist in the world. They ingeniously disguise their carnage. Usually they travel alone or maybe with one or two others. Many of them are nomadic and uncivilized. Carlisle has spoken of several of our kind who drop by to visit him every few years. They never stay long as their dietary needs differ so greatly from ours and they respect Carlisle too much to compromise his hospitality.
Carlisle maintains a relationship with a clan of female vampires in Alaska who sustain themselves on animals. I've never met them and had given some consideration to visiting them. However, Esme discreetly informed me that while they do feed on animals, they enjoy the sexual favors of human men. Apparently, the men don't always survive those encounters.
I comprehend that sex is just part of the relationship women have with men; but companionship should come first. Love, respect and commitment should follow. I learned that from my mother who was raised with Victorian era values. If I expected to attract and obtain a suitable husband, I needed to maintain my value, specifically my virginity. I guess that's part of what makes me hate Royce so much. I don't even know if it was him who stole it or if it was one of a succession of his no-good friends who raped me one right after another.
Anyway, my only chance at companionship may be wandering somewhere out there in some remote part of the world. If I don't find him in the United States or Canada, then maybe I'll learn another language and search in Europe. What else do I have to do with my time?
I gathered my belongings and set my suitcase at the foot of the stairs. "May I take these to your car?" Edward asked. I nodded yes. "I understand what you're doing. I'm sorry that I can't help you; that I can't be what you need. You're a thoroughly beautiful woman and you do deserve to be worshipped and adored. I hope you find what you're looking for. If you need anything, just call and I'll be wherever you are within a day."
I looked into Edward's permanently 17-year-old eyes and saw how much he meant those words. I hugged him and could tell that my touch had taken him aback. I don't know how long it had been since anyone other than Esme had even the simplest physical contact with him. He patted me on the back and told me to be careful. "You know they have really big bears in the Appalachian Mountains. Eat one for me," he chuckled. Edward can be kind of funny when he's not so caught up in being morose.
As we carried my bags to the car, Carlisle pulled up. He works as a physician in a town nearby and sees patients all hours of the day and night. If only I could have a portion of the contentment and joy his work brings him. "I see you didn't change your mind," he said, taking my hand. "This is hard for me, but I accept that each of you has free will."
"Carlisle," I said, "I'm not leaving forever. I may get out there and find an ugly world. What I am looking for may not exist – and I may have to accept that. I will be back. Please, just give me time."
"You can have time and anything else you need. If you have any trouble at all, please call and one of us will come to your aid immediately," he said.
"I understand that and I do appreciate it."
"Just don't forget the cardinal rule of our kind…do not bring attention to yourself. Do not bring attention to your nature. Breaching that would bring terrible consequences," Carlisle said. He rarely speaks of it, but Carlisle spent a number of years with the Volturi, the ruling class of our kind. He is intimately aware of the consequences for breaking our few simple laws.
Esme floated into the spacious garage holding a pair of sunglasses. "They're all the rage in Hollywood, you know. They may help to disguise your differences, help you to blend," she said, handing them to me.
"Thanks Esme. That was thoughtful. Okay. Well, I'll call you or drop a postcard in a few days." My family, as I had come to know them, stood in the garage and waved as I backed my Ford Deluxe Club Convertible into the driveway and left them, at least temporarily.
I felt like I had been holding my breath forever. I had been thinking of leaving for awhile and just hadn't had the guts to do it. It was a relief already to get out on my own. I wanted to go to Virginia first. Without human needs, the only reason I would need to stop was to get gas, unless something in particular captured my interest.
Within a couple of hours, I crossed from Canada into the United States. At this rate, I would be in Virginia within a day. I made reservations at the Skyland Resort which was halfway between West Virginia and Washington, D.C., in Virginia. For the next week, I planned to relax at 3,680 feet and enjoy what nature offered. I knew that as a lone female I would attract attention, so I would keep to myself as much as possible. Besides, I had found that most humans kept their distance from me anyway. I had been somewhat unapproachable as a human, but was exponentially more so now.
The ride was uneventful and took about 30 hours. I slowed down a little bit during the day today, because I wanted to arrive late in the afternoon instead of when the sun was at its peak. I look incredible when I'm in the sunlight. My golden hair pales next to my glimmering, shimmering skin. But like Carlisle warned, I shouldn't flaunt my nature.
I love the fact that my transformation enhanced my physical beauty. That is one of the very few things I like about my renovations. There are times though that it only serves to enhance my grief, especially when I remember that I have no one to share it with.
As I entered the porte cochere, a bellhop rushed to my car. He opened my door with exaggerated care so that I could step out. His scent was so potent that I held my breath and squeezed my eyes shut for a moment. I distanced myself from him, too quickly for him to see. The confused man turned around several times trying in vain to locate me. I remembered to moderate my voice before calling to him from the front door of the resort. "Over here." I waved at him. "I'll toss you my keys if you'll park it, please. I have two bags in the trunk."
"Yes ma'am. Right away ma'am," he said politely and held a hand out for the keys. I tossed them lightly – or so I thought – and they hit his hand, cutting his palm. He slung his hand, letting drops of blood fly through the air, before leaning over to pick up my keys from the ground.
I took three steps forward before I knew it, but somehow stopped myself and held my breath again. I ran inside the resort and found a ladies room right off the lobby. Thank goodness it's empty. I locked the door behind me. Oh my gosh, that was so close! I need to go hunting right after dark. I don't think I prepared adequately to be this close to humans. Should I turn around and go home? I don't think I can do this. His blood smelled so much better than that of an elk, a bobcat or even a mountain lion. The last time I was that close to human blood was with Royce.
No. I won't go there. Everything shouldn't always go back to him. He was too insignificant of a person for that. That's one habit I must break.
I stood up from the cushioned seat with a new sense of resolve, went to the mirror and took some lipstick from my purse. A little shine and my lips will be perfect. I touched up my lipstick, threw back my main of long blonde hair and left the restroom behind.
My luggage was waiting at the check-in desk. I paid the clerk for a week's stay in cash. "The bellhop was very helpful. Could you see that he receives this, please? He really went to a lot of trouble for me." I gave the man a bill folded to hide the denomination. A $10 tip is a lot in this economy, but it will help me feel better about how close he came to death.
My room was a suite with a balcony. Certainly I didn't need that much space and the bed with its luxury dressings would be of no use. All I was interested in was the balcony and the solitude. I hung up my clothes and put away my personal items. Then I changed into an outfit I often wore hunting at home. I don't want to walk through the lobby during peak promenade time wearing loose pants and a form-fitting short sleeved shirt. That's the beauty of the balcony.
I left the light on in my room so that I could easily spot it upon my return. I stood on the balcony and surveyed my surroundings for people. Seeing none, I climbed over the edge of the railing and dropped to the ground. Before I arose from my crouched landing, I listened. No one is near. I took off running for the nearby forest. The hunt has begun.
First, I found a bobcat and drained it within seconds. Still thirsty. More. More. Listen. Look. Then I caught the scent of deer. White-tailed deer and plenty of them. I turned north and creeped upon them. I leapt out of a tree onto one and drank it dry. The others had scattered. Burn. Burn. Thirsty. I stood up and threw my nose into the air, allowing my senses to overwhelm me. Panther. Yes. That's what I need. I darted to the east and found my prey. No time to play games. Thirst. Now. I landed upon the panther and drank my fill. Finally the thirst was sated.
I inspected my shirt. No blood. I always was a neat eater. Now that I was full, I ran back to the resort and made my way up to the balcony and back inside my room. I wonder if I drank enough to tolerate going down to the lounge?
I pinned up my hair and took a shower to wash away the road dirt from the trip and debris from hunting. I don't miss the sweating and smelliness of being human. Once I was dry, I put on my bra, underpants, garter and stockings. A little eyeliner, mascara and lipstick were all I needed. I pinned up my hair so that it flowed in long curls down my back. I took a pale grey silk dress out of the closet. There. That looks nice. Although I look best in darker colors and jewel tones, they usually enhance my pallor. The grey doesn't bring as much attention to my skin.
I grabbed my purse and went downstairs to the gift shop. While I was perusing their wide selection of magazines, I felt someone looking at me. A beautiful young man was about 10 feet away from me holding a Saturday Evening Post, casually flipping through the pages without even looking at them. His smile was arresting and made me feel almost weak. I quickly smiled back and looked away, grabbing a handful of movie magazines and paying for them so that I could break the connection with him. I was going to buy some magazines anyway because I had long ago learned that reading in public discourages people from approaching, but allows me to easily monitor my surroundings.
"Will someone be joining you later?" the maitre de asked when I entered the darkened lounge.
"No, I prefer to be alone this evening," I answered slowly and deliberately. He showed me to an out-of-the way table where I was greeted by a waiter who looked like a college student. "What can I get for you this evening, madam?" He said with a slight drawl.
"Red wine, please."
"Of course. Anything to eat?"
"No thank you. Not right now." Or ever.
Within two or three minutes, he brought me the glass of wine and left me to my magazines. I read with interest that pre-production continues on "The Wizard of Oz" and the hunt for Scarlett has intensified. Esme and I both loved Margaret Mitchell's "Gone With the Wind." It promises to be THE movie of 1939. Maybe we'll get tickets to a premiere.
"Test Pilot" with Clark Gable and Myrna Loy opens next week. I just love Clark Gable. Drat! I had promised Edward I would see it with him. I probably won't be back for "The Adventures of Robin Hood" with Errol Flynn, either. "You Can't Take it With You," Jimmy Stewart's next film, won't be released until August. I can't imagine that I wouldn't be home by then. Home. It is home…the only home I know now.
I laid down the magazines and scanned the room. A family caught my eye. The father had what appeared to be two of those watered down beers that the repeal of Prohibition now allows. He pushed one at his son, the large good-looking man I saw earlier in the gift shop. He had three younger sisters who clamored for his attention. He looks to be about 20 and could be on break from college. He leaned in to the youngest one and threw back his head in healthy laughter at something she said. The mother nervously looked around, afraid his loud laughter might cause someone to stare at them. He patted her hand and said, "Let loose Mom, we're on vacation." Sometimes my vampire hearing is convenient for more than just stalking animals.
He took a long drag from his mug of beer and as he was about to set it down on the table, he caught me watching him. He cocked an eyebrow and raised the mug to me as if he were toasting the evening. Then, his middle sister rose from her chair and stood in close next to her brother and showed him some papers. He went through each page commenting on her drawings. "Good job, sis. Maybe you'll be a famous artist when you grow up," he said.
He was clearly the center of attention in this beautiful family. "Hey Emmett! How is Lauren?" the oldest girl asked. Hmm, his name must be Emmett.
A cloudy expression covered his face and he looked away before answering. "She's fine, I guess."
His mother snapped to attention. "What do you mean, dear?"
"She uh, she left school at the end of winter term. I heard she married someone named Mike and moved out to Washington State," he said soberly.
"How?" his mother pressed.
"I guess I wasn't the only one. Look, I don't want to talk about this in front of the girls. We can discuss it later."
"Of course, dear," his mother said and patted him on the hand. I can't imagine what kind of fool this Lauren must be.
His bear of a father slapped him congenially on the shoulder. "Don't get down in the dumps about it, son. She's not worth the effort." He got the attention of the waiter who soon brought Emmett and his father more beer.
As the evening passed, I felt myself more and more drawn to this Emmett fellow. He was everything that Royce was not. He was very masculine and looked comfortable in his own skin. At one point he stood and I saw that he was about 6'4" with the broadest shoulders I had ever seen. When he smiled, the memory of my friend Vera from my human life came to mind. Her baby Henry had dimples like his.
It took me longer to get over the loss of Vera than it did the loss of my parents. Vera had been my best friend for years. My parents had always pushed me to be friends with girls whose fathers' worked at the bank with my father or girls whose families owned the larger businesses in town or girls whose fathers were doctors or lawyers. I went to their birthday parties and they came to mine, but I always loved Vera best.
She was never awed by my beauty or by the way men flocked to me. She loved me for myself. She wanted to know what I thought, what I felt. No one else ever asked me that. She married Henry a couple of days after she finished the eleventh grade. Ten months later, she had a little baby whom she named Henry Jr. Her husband loved her in the way I wanted to be loved. When he walked in the door of their small house after work, he kissed her and looked at her with such devotion.
Royce never looked at me that way….not even the day he said that we should get married. He didn't ask me. He didn't say he wanted to. He said we should – like his father had told him it was the socially appropriate thing to do.
Stop it Rose! Everything is not about Royce!
Anyway, sometimes I was even jealous of Vera. My mother never understood that. "She lives in a tiny house. They barely have enough money to get by. Look at her clothes!" she would say. Those things didn't matter to Vera, because she had unconditional love.
When I looked around for Emmett's family, they were gone. Nothing else in the room interested me, so I discreetly secured the waiter's attention and gave him enough money for the untouched wine and a generous tip.
I gathered my magazines and returned to my room. There was nothing to do. The magazines held no more appeal and the books I brought couldn't even hold my interest. The room didn't have a radio, so I couldn't even listen to some of the overnight shows.
After an hour or so of sheer boredom, I heard voices outside my door. Apparently, Emmett and his family were staying down the hall from me. "Son, you're not yourself. What happened with Lauren?" I heard his father ask him.
"I've had a lot on my mind and it's more than just Lauren," he answered in a serious voice.
"Tell me about her first," his father said.
"Well, Lauren is one of those girls who can make a good impression. But, how can I say this without trashing her?" he mused.
"Trash her, if that's what she deserves."
"Okay. She has the morals of an alley cat. You don't know how hard she worked to get my attention. She offered things of herself that other girls had not. You know what I mean?" he asked his father.
"I suspected as much. Go on."
"Well, I wasn't her first. She had lots of experience under her belt," Emmett laughed at his own joke. "But, I was a conquest. Once she had me, she began to stray. I don't know what she saw in this Mike guy. I had always considered him to be something of a pussy."
His father cleared his throat.
"Sorry, Dad. But, she liked him and wanted to leave Virginia. They got married and as I said, they moved out to Washington for the 'happily ever after.'
"So, what else has been on your mind, son?" his father pressed.
"A lot of people are worried about Hitler, Mussolini and everything else going on in Europe. Every day, you hear something worse than the day before. I've put a lot of thought into this….I want to leave school and join the military." He seemed in a hurry to get his words out. "If I join now with some college behind me, I can be an officer before there's any action in Europe."
"I think someone has been putting some fancy notions in your head. Nothing is going to happen in Europe. My God, it has only been 17 years since the end of the last war over there," his father said. "I lost my only brother in World War I. I won't lose my only son to this European nonsense."
"But Dad…" Emmett pleaded.
"No. I forbid it," his father said sternly. "Let's turn in. We have a full day tomorrow."
I heard a long sigh. "I'll be in soon. I'm going to walk around outside for a spell." Poor Emmett. He sounds so defeated.
"Alright, but don't get any more ideas about this military business."
When their conversation ended, I changed from the grey dress into a long-sleeved shirt, dungarees and walking boots and slipped over the rails of the balcony once again. There could be no harm in going outside. I would only watch him from afar.
I walked for a little while and found a lovely precipice. I sat on the edge enjoying the view, but my thoughts strayed back to Emmett. If I ever find a vampire mate in this world, I would want him to look like Emmett.
The air here smells so much different than that in Canada, or in New York for that matter. It smells so clean and fresh. I allowed myself to become absorbed in my senses until…
SNAP! What the hell? I leapt to my feet and spun away from the precipice, landing in a crouch. The roar, the human yell, the blood overtook me. I ran with lightning speed in that direction, my senses pinpointing the exact location. Once I knew that I was close, I took to the trees, bounding from limb to limb until I was directly above a huge black bear who was swatting a man with his giant paw, slicing him with his claws.
The limb I was standing on crackled and the bear turned to check out his company. Oh my God! It's Emmett. He has Emmett. He's bleeding. Everywhere.
Before I could think about it anymore, I was on the bear's shoulders ripping a giant gaping hole in his throat. In only a few seconds, I consumed enough blood to kill the beast. I slung his corpse to the side so that I could determine the extent of Emmett's injuries. Remembering Carlisle's stories from the hospital, I ripped pieces of Emmett's tattered shirt and my own to make tourniquets. His heart was still beating, but it was weak. His head barely moved and he could breathe, but he had no motion from there down. The bear had broken his back at a lethal level. Where is Carlisle when I need him?
He opened his eyes and looked at me with the same innocence that Vera's Henry had. If vampires could cry…
"Is it bad?" he breathed. I shook my head yes. "Tell me," he begged.
"Are you in any pain?" I asked, afraid of the answer.
"My head. I can't feel anything else." He gasped a couple of times.
I leaned down close to his face so that I could be sure that he heard me. "Emmett, the bear broke your neck and probably some other bones. You have some bad cuts, too."
"I'm gonna die, right?" he said, tears sliding from the sides of his eyes.
He deserves the truth and he seemed to realize the implications of a spinal cord injury. "Yes, I'm afraid so." He closed his eyes and swallowed hard.
"I can't believe it's you. Who are you?" he asked.
"Rosalie. Rosalie Hale." The desperation of the situation outweighed the lure of his blood.
"You smell so good, Rose. Just like your name."
I smiled and brushed his hair out of his eyes.
"I don't want to go back," Emmett said suddenly.
"Your family…they need to know," I told him gently.
"No. I don't want them to see me like this."
"I understand."
"I wish there was another way," he whispered.
"What did you just say?"
"I wish there was another way. I want to stay with you forever," he said with great effort.
"Do you mean that?" Oh shit.
He blinked his eyes twice.
"Do you know what you're asking for?"
He blinked again.
"If you can hold on long enough Emmett, I can give you forever," I said carefully. Does he really know what he's asking for?
"That's what I'm asking for." His eyes confirmed his request.
My thoughts flowed in rapid succession as I developed a plan. At first, I considered running with him all the way to Manitoba. The trip would be physically grueling and exceedingly risky for him no matter what, but carrying him left Emmett with almost no hope of survival. My only other option was to drive him. The car was new and Edward and I had gotten it up to 90 miles per hour without difficulty. It might go even faster. While I thought it through, I found the corpse of the bear and ripped off one of its paws. If he makes it, Emmett might want it as a souvenir.
I lifted Emmett easily and within a span of seconds reached my car. I ripped out the front passenger's seat and broke it in half. I placed the parts on the floorboard and laid Emmett with his head in the backseat. His knees were bent and supported, leaving his feet under the dashboard. Once he was secure, I bounded to the balcony and into my room, quickly packing my belongings and leaving a note for the maid that I was gone and someone else could have the room. I was back to my car and filling my trunk within two minutes from the time I left.
Even though I knew he couldn't feel it, I held Emmett's hand. After about three hours on the road, I stopped for gas and to call Carlisle. "Esme," I said, "is Carlisle there?"
"No honey, he's at the hospital. Are you alright?" Esme asked, clearly worried.
"It's not me. I need him to be at home when I arrive. I hope to be there in eight hours, maybe a little bit longer. I'll call when I'm an hour or two from home. Please Esme. Please tell him," I begged.
"Rosalie darling, what is wrong?" she demanded.
"I don't have time to talk now. Please, just do as I ask." I hung up, bought a bottled drink and ran back to the car. I tinkered with the engine a bit before sliding back into the driver's seat. I fed Emmett the drink a few drops at a time. I know that his ability to swallow may be compromised, but I have to do everything I can to keep him alive until we get home. At least he stopped bleeding.
We had been back on the road about an hour when I heard Emmett's weak voice. "Rose, can you sing for me?
"Of course I will. Is there anything special you want to hear?"
"Anything is fine."
I sang every song I could think of from Broadway, some popular songs and even Christmas songs. Every time I would stop, he would say, "Rose, you sound like an angel. More please." I would do anything to keep him alive.
Right before we reached the Canadian border, I called home and thankfully Carlisle answered the phone. "I think I'll be home in a little more than an hour. You'll be there, won't you?" I asked.
"Yes. What is it that you need so badly?"
"Carlisle, I know you never expected to hear this, but I need you to save someone for me."
"I see. Just hurry and I'll see what I can do." I hung up the phone without saying thank you, good bye or kiss my foot. My only purpose in life was to get Emmett McCarty safely into the hands of Carlisle Cullen, the only man who could save him from a final death.
I could tell that Emmett's condition was steadily worsening and he drifted in and out of consciousness. At one point he asked, "What can I expect?"
I had hoped that he would not ask me that. At this point I had become very selfish. I wanted Emmett and I needed him to be my mate and love of my life. If he knows too much, he may choose to die and I would have to respect his wishes. I have always resented not having a choice, so he deserves the truth.
"Emmett, we are vampires," I said and left it hanging in the air for a moment.
"No shit," he said as exuberantly as anyone in his condition could.
"Yes shit. But you won't do that anymore if you choose to be turned. We lose that particular bodily function. Do you understand?"
"Okay," he whispered. "Go on."
"Carlisle is the core of our family. He turned his wife Esme, Edward and me. I don't understand the mechanics of the transformation, I can only share my experience. I was aware that like you, I was dying. The next thing I knew, the pain intensified as the venom flowed through me. It takes two or three days for the process to be complete." I stopped to make sure he was listening.
"When you gain awareness and the pain is gone, you'll be very thirsty. Very, very thirsty for blood. We don't get our blood from humans. We hunt animals."
"Hmmm," I heard him say.
"At first your eyes will be crimson, but as you feed on more and more animals, your eyes will turn gold or topaz. When you are thirsty, they'll turn black. Your skin will turn to stone. It would feel hard and icy cold to a human, but it feels soft and warm to another vampire.
"Another thing about your skin….when you go out in the sunlight, it will sparkle like diamonds. That's why we can't go out in the sunlight in front of humans. We tend to live in places that are cloudy or at a high latitude. We don't sleep during the day or sleep in coffins. In fact, we don't sleep at all. Ever."
"Fangs?" he asked breathily.
"That's a myth. There are lots of myths about us. In fact, almost every myth you've ever heard about vampires is untrue. We actually try to mix with humans as much as possible. Carlisle is a physician to humans. Esme is an architect. Edward and I are physically younger than they are and usually attend school."
"Strong?" I don't think his voice could get any weaker.
"Yes, you may be strong as a human, but you'll be extremely strong and fast as a vampire. That may really appeal to you."
"Sex?" That question blew me away. I didn't expect him to ask that.
"Yes on that, too. Vampires do have sex, but only with their mate. We don't have sex with humans."
"Rose, you're so beautiful." After what seemed like an endless pause, he asked, "Are you my…" He was fading.
"I hope so. I truly hope so." Our speed exceeded the limits of the speedometer. Please, please let me get him home in time. I put my hand on his chest and found that his heart was still beating, but it was so weak and thready. He was now completely unconscious.
The turnoff to our house was straight ahead. I hit it at record speed and slid down the driveway and as close to the front door as was possible. I jumped over the top of the car to the passenger's side and lifted Emmett out. He was barely breathing. I looked up and Carlisle was standing at the wide open front door.
I ran with my precious package and laid him gently on the couch. Carlisle kneeled next to him, checking his pulse, heart, breathing and extent of injury. "You almost didn't make it Rosalie. He's almost gone."
"I know. I tried so hard. Carlisle, can you try? Please?" I begged.
"Rosalie, does he know what we are?"
"Yes."
"Do you think that he understands? Did you explain it all to him?"
"Yes to both."
"Did he consent to be turned?"
"Yes, without a doubt. Carlisle, I think he knew before I told him. He told me he wanted to stay with me forever and that I should help him do that."
"It sounds like he understands. Are you certain this is what you want? Will you resent me in the future for our decision today?"
"I want this more than anything and I am doing this for him out of love."
"Then there is no time to lose. Go now and see Esme. I will move him once the transformation has begun. Rosalie, please understand that his condition is grave and there is a possibility that he may not survive the process," Carlisle said earnestly.
"I understand." I grasped Emmett's hand and kissed him on the forehead. I left Carlisle to his duty and didn't look when he bit Emmett.