A/N: a one shot that popped into my head when I thought about how I would like Hook and Emma to – shall we say – get closer ;) OUAT is of course not mine if it were I'd get to write stuff like this full time and that would be a lot of fun. Reviews are much appreciated and feed the muse.
A haunted Hook and a heated encounter
A Cherokee legend - Two Wolves
An old Cherokee is teaching his grandson about life. "A fight is going on inside me," he said to the boy.
"It is a terrible fight and it is between two wolves. One is evil - he is anger, envy, sorrow, regret, greed, arrogance, self-pity, guilt, resentment, inferiority, lies, false pride, superiority, and ego." He continued, "The other is good - he is joy, peace, love, hope, serenity, humility, kindness, benevolence, empathy, generosity, truth, compassion, and faith. The same fight is going on inside you - and inside every other person, too."
The grandson thought about it for a minute and then asked his grandfather, "Which wolf will win?"
The old Cherokee simply replied, "The one you feed."
With a pounding heart Emma stood shocked as Neal dropped down to Gold's side. Gold clutched his chest weakly as blood soaked his shirt.
Seconds earlier Hook had stood in front of Gold with his hook embedded in his chest, he had looked savage, wild when he turned to see them – then pulling his hook out of Gold he tore out of the other doorway in the room.
"Henry, stay with Neal and Mr. Gold." She ran out of the other doorway after Hook. By the time she got down to the street he was gone. How in the world did the pirate get here? Her father had called and told her that Hook had punched him out and taken back his hook. Yet how did he find them? She stood on the windy sidewalk stunned. Then she remembered his ship and started running towards the harbour. As she got closer she suddenly had a glimpse of a black clad figure stepping, by what appeared, off the dock into the sea. Only he didn't stumble into the sea, he disappeared. The cloaked ship was there.
It took her a few more minutes to get to where Hook had disappeared to but then she found a foothold and stepped onto it. She found herself at the top of some steps on the ship. It was huge, like the tall ships she had seen on TV. Beautiful. Her eyes spotted Hook he stood staring out at the open ocean his hand tightly gripping the rail.
"Hook! What the hell did you think you were doing coming out here?" she yelled at him. After leaving with Gold since she owed him a favour and to appease him to prevent him from killing Hook, it irked her to no end that the injured pirate had followed. She would never have thought him to be well enough to do something like this.
He turned slowly, his arm still wrapped around his broken ribs. He didn't speak but his eyes held a chilling look.
She gasped, "Hook?"
In a hoarse voice he asked, "Is he dead? Is he finally dead?"
"I don't know, he wasn't when I left."
Hook closed his eyes tightly. "I thought…I thought I'd feel something. A joy, an elation."
She tilted her head to the side watching him carefully. "What do you feel?"
His haunted blue eyes opened again. "Nothing."
She shook her head sadly. "All the revenge in the world won't bring Milah back to you."
He responded in a choked voice. "I know that. I either killed or have at least gravely wounded the demon who took her from me, that is all I ever wanted."
A wash of sympathy rolled over her. There was so much anguish in his eyes. She had gone after him to arrest him but she couldn't bring herself to do it. If someone killed anyone that she loved she may very well be tempted to do the same thing as Hook.
She stated the obvious, "And yet you feel no relief."
He turned from her and stared out at the ocean again. His voice was tight. "This quest for revenge has sustained me for 300 years. I lived, breathed, slept for revenge. I should feel something!" He declared desperately.
She came up behind him and leaned against the rail beside him. "Maybe what you need to do is say your goodbyes to Milah. Maybe you have been hanging on for all these years with this plot for revenge and through it all keeping Milah alive."
The knuckles on his hand were white from gripping the rail in a death grip. He stormily gazed out to sea. Shore birds chattered as they hunted for fish, dark clouds rolled in turning the sea a dark smoky gray. Hook released a shaky breath.
She saw the raw pain that still consumed him. She bit her lip, she knew she was wading into dangerous territory with him. "Did, did you say goodbye to her, when you buried her?"
"No. I was too numb and injured to do much of anything. My men wrapped her body in muslin and she was buried at sea. I focused on how to get my revenge and that was getting to Neverland and finding a way."
"Hook." She remembered how quickly the charm and flirting had dropped when she asked him about his tattoo back on the beanstalk, how he had turned away from her and barely made eye contact. She remembered how filled with emotion his voice was when he pleaded with her to release him after she had chained him. The man had never allowed himself to succumb to his grief, to find release, to say good-bye and accept what had happened. He enveloped himself in a black empty shawl of revenge and now that shawl had disintegrated and he was left with nothing.
"You need to find a way to say goodbye, otherwise you will never find peace."
His voice was heavy when he glanced at her again. "I don't need peace."
She moved closer and put her hand on his arm. "Everyone needs peace." He trembled under her touch for a moment then wrenched his arm away.
His eyes narrowed and his gaze turned to ice. He spat, "Why are you here Swan? Either arrest me or leave!"
She paused debating her next course of action. She could arrest him but where would that get him other than sitting in a cell. She could just leave and sentence him to his misery but she didn't want to leave him alone in the state he was in. Looking at him right now literally made her heart hurt. She didn't have time to figure out why he affected her so but she knew she needed to stay.
"When we were up on the beanstalk, when I hurt my hand, you asked me to let you help me. Let me repay the favour."
He sneered. "I'm not bleeding and any rum I have will go in me not on me."
He was bleeding he just didn't realize it. She nodded. "Okay then let's have a drink, you pirates always have a nice stash of rum don't you?'
He smirked. "Think you can drink me under the table so you can have your way with me? I assure you many have tried to make me lose control of my faculties and take over my ship but everyone has failed but depending on your motives sweetheart, maybe I'll let you win."
She noted that when he usually flirted with her his eyes sparkled with delight but now his eyes were cold and dead. Whatever smile he plastered on his face never reached his eyes.
"Come on then," he challenged and winced gripping his ribs as he limped down the stairs to the rooms below.
She hesitated for only a moment her thoughts traveling to Henry and the others. She knew Neal would take care of their son and right now the only danger to them all was here with her. Cora and Regina couldn't leave Storybrooke so they weren't a threat. Yet she had to make sure. She pulled her cell out of her pocket and called Henry. "Are you all right, how's Mr. Gold?"
"We're at the hospital, he's in surgery. Where are you?"
"I had to take care of something."
"You went after Captain Hook didn't you?"
She hesitated but then "yes" she wouldn't lie to her son anymore.
"Be kind to him." Came her son's unexpected request.
She frowned, "Why would you say that? You saw what he did to Mr. Gold."
"I know but he's hurt. Not like, you know a skinned knee, but deep inside where no one sees but it hurts all the more."
She smiled softly at how remarkable and how observant her son was.
She suddenly remembered Hook saying how perceptive she was when she figured out that Gold had taken Milah from him. Apparently her son had that perceptive nature as well.
"I'm so sorry I lied to you Henry and I'm so lucky and proud to have you in my life."
He laughed softly. "I love you too … mom." Her heart felt warm.
"Can I talk to Neal for a moment?"
"Sure."
"Emma, are you all right?"
Her eyes narrowed. After abandoning her all those years ago it almost seemed like a joke for him to even be asking. But it wasn't important. "I'm fine, I'm not sure when I'm going to be back can you promise me you'll take care of my son until I do?'
"Our son and of course, he's a great kid. Did you catch Hook?"
She sighed, "It's complicated."
Neal suddenly stated. "I know what my father did to my mother."
"What? How do you know that?"
"I spend some time in Neverland, I know the pirate's mission."
"You knew Hook?"
"Yes, I spend some time with the lost boys, and he actually took care of us. He had the same haunted look that we all had, I guess misery loves company."
"Did he know you were Rumpelstiltskin's son?"
"Yes."
"And he never hurt you?"
"No, I think he realized I was just as much of a victim plus I am also Milah's son…I think that alone granted me immunity from his mission. I can't condone what he did but I do understand it." He sighed and his voice grew tight. "Despite that I don't want my father to die."
"Let me know what happens," she said sincerely. "I probably won't be answering my phone for awhile but leave me a message. And Neal – thanks for taking care of Henry."
She hung up and followed the pirate to where he had gone below. He was in what was obviously the captain's quarters. A huge wooden bed stood in one corner, a rich red Persian rug covered the floor, and a large mahogany desk stood by the porthole. She looked around in fascination
Hook had put a large bottle of rum on the desk and two glasses. His eyes were suspicious as he looked at her. "So … is the demon dead?"
"He's in surgery at the hospital. They don't know if he'll live."
Hook gave a curt nod and opened the bottle of rum with his teeth, giving Emma a flashback to when he took care of her bleeding hand. She shook her head trying to shake off the memory; she had felt so drawn to him then even though she had done her best to deny it. He filled up both glasses. "Well give it your best shot, Swan." He threw the liquid in his glass easily down his throat and filled the glass again.
She sat down a few feet away from him and followed suit. His chin was tilted stubbornly and his eyes held no lightness of humour. He meant business. He filled her glass again and they both downed the rum at the same time. He nodded at her acknowledging that she was keeping up with his pace.
"Why exactly are we doing this?" she asked.
"So you can get me drunk and bed me…wasn't that the plan?" he smirked again.
She lifted her eyebrows.
Her eyes lit on a drawing of a young woman with long dark wavy hair dressed in pirate's garb. "Was that Milah?" she asked directly pointing in its direction.
His expression darkened and he broke eye contact, neither looking at her or the drawing. "It was."
"She was a beautiful woman." Emma remarked watching his face for a reaction.
He quickly glanced into her eyes, "Aye she was." His voice had taken that heavy tone again as if an obstruction blocked his throat. He cleared his throat and grabbed the bottle of rum taking a swig, then passed it to her. She did likewise. He nodded. "Impressive, most lasses can't keep up with me."
She pressed him. "Was Milah able to."
His gaze darkened again. His steely blue gaze bore into her. "I think it's time for you to go back to your son."
"And leave you to your misery?" she challenged him.
He glared at her murderously and she saw for the first time why Captain Hook had the reputation of being one of the fiercest pirates of the seas. He abruptly got up startling her and reached over to grab her arm. He whispered menacingly, "Time for you to go." He limped up the stairs to the deck dragging her with him. Night had fallen and thunder rumbled ominously in the distance.
She didn't fight him, she knew she had touched a nerve but she asked softly. "Why can't you speak of Milah? Are you harbouring all the pain of losing her inside of you? Don't you think it's time to let go?"
He let go of her and yelled at her in desperation, his eyes wide and pleading as lightning flashed above them. "Swan, what are doing? Why are you doing this to me?"
Tears unwittingly entered her eyes. "Because I'm trying to help you!" she choked out.
He looked startled then winced and turned away from her.
She came up behind him warily, unsure of what he would do; she put her hand on his back. "If your Milah loved you as much as you loved her, she wouldn't want this for you."
He turned suddenly "What makes you think you have any idea of what she would want." He yelled at her again as she stepped back but when she looked up she noticed his eyes had filled with tears. She inhaled sharply as her heart clenched painfully.
"Because I couldn't stand seeing someone I love waste 300 years of their lives on revenge. I'd want to see them happy and continuing to live life as best as they can. Because it would kill me all over again to see them suffer like you are."
He gasped and stumbled over to the railing, his legs seem to give out and he fell to his knees on the deck. He doubled over, his hand over his face. His shoulders shook as wracking sobs consumed him. She cautiously approached, knelt down beside him and put her arms around him. He didn't fight her as she stroked his black hair and murmured all the things one says when trying to comfort someone. "Shhh." "It's going to be all right." "You will get through this." She then added, "You aren't alone." His arms wrapped around her tightly. They stayed like that for a few minutes as the thunder and lightning intensified above them, until he calmed and pulled away for her, his face wet with tears, He weakly rose to his feet and gripped the rail. His hand came up to wipe his face as he stared out over the stormy water.
She rose to stand beside him again also staring out that the water.
His voice was hoarse. "She didn't spend a day without regretting leaving her son. She was happy with me and the life we had but there was always this underlying sadness in her. I would have done anything for her including going back to get her son but she didn't think a pirate ship was the right place. We had started planning a new life where six months of the year we would live on land and raise our own family, I had gone out to celebrate with my mates after she announced she was with child that's when I encountered Rumpelstiltskin and our lives ended." He stared down at the sea. "And aye, like you she could hold her rum and keep pace with me. And no, she would be furious to know that I've spent all the years since her death on avenging her." He turned his head to look at her with tired, haunted eyes. "What do you want from me, Swan?"
"What do you mean?" she replied.
"Well lass, you made it abundantly clear you don't trust me, you chained me up on the beanstalk, you chained me to the bed. What are your motives for being on my ship?"
Her mouth went dry. How could she possibly answer him when she didn't know the answer herself. He pressed closer to her. "What is it Swan, cat got your tongue? Or do you just enjoy tormenting me? Good for you – you bested me again, you brought me weeping to my knees to humiliate me." He stepped even closer his eyes glittering dangerously then wrapped his hand around her throat, his thumb lightly caressing her. "Or did you want me on my knees for a different purpose?"
"You bastard!" Her anger burst and she slapped him across the face hard enough to snap his head back. He let go of her abruptly. "I've felt guilty for leaving you on the beanstalk ever since it happened. I came here to arrest you but couldn't bring myself to do it because you are already suffering. I wanted to help you to deal with all this." She huffed and continued. "Normal people grieve after they lose a loved one, it helps them come to terms with the loss, to say goodbye, to make some peace for themselves – I didn't do any of this to humiliate you I did it to help heal you, if you weren't such a conceited evil twisted ass you would have understood that!" She turned to leave when his hand reached out and grabbed hers. She stopped in her tracks and turned.
He stared at her with red-rimmed eyes as the skies opened and a deluge of hard rain descended on them soaking them both instantly.
"What, Hook? Why are you stopping me now? What do you want from me!" She shouted angrily above the raging storm.
He pulled her close his hook looping her hair around it. A cruel grin lit his lips. No matter, later, how many times she replayed the moment in her head, she didn't know what prompted her actions. Her hand came up sliding up his neck to the back of his head, grabbing a handful of his black hair she pulled him close and kissed him. He froze for only a second then with a growl pushed her back against the wall and kissed her so hungrily and desperately as if his life were dependant on it. When the kiss ended both were left gasping for air.
His lips curved seductively and he moved his head down so they were nose to nose, in a throaty whisper directly into her ear he murmured, "Fuck me, Swan."
Her breath left her. Her mouth went dry. It was as if the entire world got turned off. All that mattered at the moment were the haunted blue eyes now staring in hers. Eyes that had been betrayed, hurt, eyes that in many ways had shut off the world as her own had. She had known from the moment she laid eyes on him that somehow their paths were destined to cross. And it had scared her, maybe that was part of the reason she left him on the beanstalk, he was too real, he was meant to be hers and that terrified her. She stared at those haunted eyes, the wet wildly disheveled black hair, the stubble on his face, his sensuous lips and then heat overwhelmed her and in answer to his question her hands came up and violently ripped his shirt open pulling it out of his pants and tugging it off him dropping it to the wet deck. Hot damn! His body was beautiful despite the scars and bruises currently marring it, it was all hard sleek muscle glistening with rain. She licked her lips.
His eyes sparkled with life and desire. He growled again and with one hand in her hair his hook gently landed on her neck. The cold metal making her gasp as it trailed down her neck to her chest and then slowly one by one ripped the buttons off her blouse, robbing her of breath. Soon her shirt too dropped onto the deck. His eyes wandered appreciatively down her body then with a flick of his hook her bra joined her shirt. It was cold and windy but the shiver that consumed her was from the pirate's hot and lingering gaze. He smiled and whispered 'beautiful', then bending slightly he picked her up and slung her over his shoulder as he made his way out of the rain and painfully down the stairs into his quarters. He gently dropped her on the bed and stretched out beside her his hand trailing over her body his eyes not leaving hers. Her hand landed on his chest stroking the black hair and trailing kisses over his sore spots. His breath grew laboured when her hand undid the buttons on his leather pants. She pushed herself up so she could more easily divest him of then as they slid down his hips. She smiled appreciatively – his pretty face wasn't the only thing that enticed women into his bed.
"My turn Swan," he whispered in that lyrical way he spoke and his hand proceeded to unbutton and unzip her jeans, his hook then caught on a belt loop and he slid her jeans off her hips. She pushed against him, flipped him on his back making his inhale sharply and then straddled him. She gasped as his hand slid down to cup her and his hook came up to gently play with her breasts. With a mischievous twinkle in his passion laden eyes he leant up suddenly impaling her and kissed her at the same time catching her gasp on his lips. He then gave a throaty laugh "I told you when I jab you with my sword you'll feel it."
Hours later Emma woke up to find the pirate propped up on an elbow watching her. He smiled softly but confusion and wariness shone from his eyes.
It likely echoed in her own. Their encounter a few hours ago was the most intense, exciting, exhilarating, unexpected, moment in her life.
"What exactly happened between us?" he asked cautiously.
She couldn't stop herself from teasing him at that moment. She bit her lip then grinned. "It's a shame you don't remember, it was only the most amazing sex ever."
He burst into a laugh then trailed his hand down the side of her face. "Oh I remember every intoxicating detail of it. I just never expected it to actually happen."
Her hand came up to lightly caress his mussed up hair. "I don't know. Let's not question it or analyze it. Maybe it was something that was meant to be in that moment. Something maybe we both needed."
He nodded. Just then her cell rang. She groaned as she looked over the side of the bed for her jeans. She found the phone in her pocket. "Hello?"
It was Neal telling her that Gold was out of danger and would be okay. She told him she would be there soon to take care of Henry. When she hung up she saw that Hook's eyes were hooded.
"He's alive isn't he?"
She took a deep breath. "Yes, I'm sorry."
He shook his head. "This isn't over."
Her heart dropped a little but she had known all along if Gold didn't die Hook was not yet in a place where he could let his quest for revenge end.
She wasn't ready to leave yet, not ready to leave him alone with this news fresh on his mind. She moved closer to his still naked body and put her hand on him then she licked his earlobe and whispered, "Fuck me Hook."
He moved his head back to stare into her eyes then his lips widened into a smile. "Ooooch demanding ...with pleasure milady." Then with a throaty growl he threw her on her back.
The end.
