Ready For a Fall, a gilmore girls fanfic

DISCLAIMER –Nope, I do not own any part of The Gilmore Girls, all the credit goes to the WB and Amy Sherman-Palladino… The lyrics are from 'Ready for a Fall' by PJ Olsson.

Ready For a Fall

They always say that love hurts – you open yourself to others, make yourself vulnerable, and you get hurt. For the longest time, I never had to worry about that, love wasn't something I wanted. Why should it be, anyway? It's not like I'm ever short of willing girls, all I had to do was to say the word, and bam! Instant results. Always in my favor. I always won. And that's precisely the way I liked it.

You sit there in my shadows

And you call it your relief

Don't be the one with bad eyes for

The things that I could see (Don't give me that)

No love, no hurt. It's funny how all that changed -- when she came along. Rory Gilmore, the girl with the cornflower blue eyes and guileless smile. Rory Gilmore, the girl whose innocence was enough of an indication that she didn't fit at all in the stuffy halls of Chilton. Rory Gilmore, the one and only girl who didn't give a damn about me -- the only girl I cannot have.

The darkness has no armor

Need protection from the air

High hopes through time passing

When I see I want you there

At first, it started out as just another game – one that I was sure I'd win. But it seemed that the more I tried, the more out of reach she became. And trying is not something I'm used to.

I can't believe

You're the one for me

If it was this easy to find you

I should be ready for a fall

I guess it was inevitable that I would end up falling for her, and I did – big time. She frustrated me, drove me to the edge of my sanity with her aloofness, her disdainful replies to my overtures…and the way her eyes flashed fire whenever she shot back a sharp retort to me. Her eyes. I've never seen eyes so blue.

Now my wonders rally

Around the person I once was

Like a bird I keep on helping

Hope you're healed and strong

You never know when you might have to fly

It wasn't that I went out of my way to be a jerk to her, or to make her life a living hell. Why didn't she ever giggle or blush whenever I spoke to her, like the other girls? Why didn't she ever look flattered whenever I made the effort to approach her in school? Most girls would swoon if I so much as looked their way! Why didn't she do that? Simple. Because she was different. Because she was special. Because she was Rory Gilmore.

Where will you go after me?

Where will you go after I set you free?

And I don't know you from a page in my book

Though I should

I knew she had a boyfriend, I knew that she was out of my league, but that didn't stop me. If there had been a way for me to get through to her, for me to throw away the mask I've hidden behind for so long, if it meant she would finally get to see the real me, by God, I would have done it. I would have done it in a second.

I can't believe

You're the one for me

If it was this easy to find you

I should be ready for a fall

She said she hated me. That hurt, but not as much as seeing her run straight into that bagboy Dean's arms. For a moment, it felt like someone had ripped my heart out, tossed it on the pavement, and driven over it with a Mack truck. For a moment, I actually thought I would break down and cry, but I didn't. Tristan DuGrey never cries, not over a girl – not even if she was Rory Gilmore.

Where will you go after me?

Where will you go after I set you free?

And I don't know you from a page in my book

Though I should

That's the thing about life, though. Sometimes you win. Sometimes you lose. That's when you pick up the pieces and hope to God you get over it. And ultimately, that's the thing about love.

You always wind up getting hurt.

The End