The cold early March air was unforgiving as it sliced through the open fields, biting at anything it came in contact with. I stood there, accepting the wind, like it would let me forget all those painful memories that wouldn't depart. I had thought the wind would blow away my memories, just as it had blown away the scent of the only one I have ever truly loved. That's what I had wished, but that wish would always remain un-granted.
Yet somehow I knew I would eventually feel this way, that this feeling would reach me, and devour me and take my soul with it. It would ruin my life, bringing me down to the misery that it was. Could I ever truly let my hidden love for him leave? Would this chilling breeze be able to pull away my troubles, just like it had pulled that rose apart, bit by bit, petal by tender petal? His life had drained away slowly, and he had accepted it with open arms. That pain and suffering he felt for so long brought him down, slowly, and I had to watch every step of the way. It wrenched my heart, it pulled at my soul, it chained me to hell, as I had to look into those dying eyes, and see the sort of contented love that only someone like him could ever hope to possess. Even though he knew what would happen, even though he knew people would mourn forever because of his loss, he made those last words and last expressions something to make people like myself never forget.
The expression of love that shone so brightly in his emerald eyes was directed at those who he knew loved him. He wanted to let those people know that everything would be okay. He wanted to give them comfort, and his gaze enveloped them so warmly that told them he was not scared. I had wanted that gaze. I had wanted to shine my own dark eyes into his and see that love that I never received, that love that I never gave in the first place, and that was my mistake. It was my mistake for keeping my feelings buried under a rock for so long. If only I had opened up to him, like he opened up to so many others, just like the rose that he was, opening up for others to enjoy and care for. All I ever did was sit back and watch, not being able to make myself move that rock and let out those feelings I've had since the day we met.
Please review! I have the whole thing written, but I'm posting it here to see how other people like it. It's not too long, four chapters, but if you guys like it, I may add more. We'll see. But please review! Chapters will come quickly.
Takara Taji