So…ummm….this is my 200th fic posted to this site. I have definitely made a little home here and I am so happy to share it with all you wonderful people. Thank you for encouraging me to keep writing and for reviewing and favouriting and following for all these years.
This is dedicated to all of you, but particularly to the Captain Swan fandom because that is where the inspiration lies these days :) I can't thank you guys enough for accepting me into one of the best fandoms I have had the privilege of being a part of.
Enjoy.
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This Mess Was Yours (now your mess is mine)
…
It's like a dream, hazy and unsure and verging on impossible. Why would he be doing this? Why would he risk losing his Swan if not in a dream? Everything around him swirls in patterns of disguise and he knows that this is so he can't return to this place if he somehow gains control of his heart again. He knows that the Crocodile doesn't like loose ends and so he's tied every single one of them up.
Killian tries to feel around him for anything distinguishing, but his fingertips are met with ice cold all around him while it feels as though he's walking across hot coals barefoot. Everything is wrong. It's all so wrong.
The magical box that contains a sinister hat is tucked under his arm, digging into his ribs with every step. He wonders if he'll even feel any of this pain once he's completed his task – the cold, the hot, the sharp stab – or if his universe will become a numb blackness once he has done the bidding of the Dark One and taken his love's powers. Because how could he feel anything when Emma Swan is gone from this world? How could he survive that?
His feet stop moving and he takes the box from under his arm, setting it down on the burning hot ground. Tears well in his eyes and fall straight down, evaporating before they hit anything; it's like they don't matter, like Rumpelstiltskin simply doesn't care for his basic human emotions. Placing the box down is like trying to pry Emma from his fingertips – he doesn't want to let it go. But he can feel the Dark One's commands wrapping around his heart and squeezing until he can't breathe.
Gasping, Killian straightens up and, when he looks down, the box is at his feet.
His fist clenches at his side as he focuses all his thoughts on simply picking the damn thing back up again and walking out of here before Emma can be harmed. But it doesn't matter how hard he tries, his body stays straight and the box remains on the ground.
"Killian?"
His head shoots up at her voice, his mind screaming at her to run, to get the hell away from here, wherever here is. But his lips just form her name, coming out on a choked whisper, "Emma." He feels his chest tighten and know that the Dark One's words are coming out of him now, "I've missed you, darling."
She smiles but it doesn't reach her eyes, like she knows something is amiss, "What's going on here, Killian?"
He tries to keep his mouth shut, to keep quiet, but the words escape without his permission, "I've set up a little surprise."
Her form is blurry through the haze surrounding his mind but he can sense her getting closer and closer, trusting him and curious to see what he has in store for her, "If you wanted to surprise me, we could have done that in less…creepy surroundings." She's trying not to sound judgemental because, to her, this is just him picking out a rendezvous place. But Killian wants her to judge him, wants her to be mad and tell him what a horrid place this is, wants her to run away from him in disgust.
She won't though.
He never thought their love for each other would hurt them.
"It's quiet out here; we can be as loud as we want." His voice is laced with innuendo and seduction and Killian hates himself. He can feel his feet moving him closer to Emma, his hand reaching out to cup her face before his lips meet hers.
She is reluctant at first and he knows that she understands that something is very wrong but, after a moment, she relaxes into his embrace, letting her hands travel up his chest and over his shoulders to link behind his neck. It's an odd sensation, knowing that Rumpelstiltskin is watching from just behind them, just out of sight, that he is close by and ensuring every move is calculated.
Emma lets one of her hands slide back down his chest resting just above where his heart should be housed. Her fingertips gently dig into the skin there and he almost jumps back in shock. But his only job right now is to continue kissing her, the command making him feel dirty and sick. Emma seems to be quite perceptive though, tilting her face away from his kiss, but allowing her neck to become his bounty. With her lips free, she whispers very urgently, "I know," emphasised with a particularly pointed squeeze at his chest.
His eyes widen but she quickly presses her lips back against his to stop him from reacting any further. His mind is racing though because of course she knows. Of course she had noticed the way he feared being in a room with her for the last week, the way he'd disappear and return without a word of explanation, the way he'd taken to staring at her endlessly and memorising every detail of her. He knows that from its position in the Dark One's hands, his heart would be beating faster and faster. Because knowing about it means that she is going to want to do something about it. And that has him incomprehensibly worried.
He can sense the moment Rumpelstiltskin enters the room, stepping from his hiding spot and towards the box that Killian had placed on the ground, can feel the magic energy zapping in the air as he pulls out the wand to activate the hat. He wants to scream at him, to fight him until he cannot do what he's about to do. He finds himself kissing Emma more desperately now, knowing that this could be the last time, that this could be the end. With his hand crawling up her back to tangle in the long strands of her hair, he realises that his movements are his own, that he is no longer under the control of the Crocodile.
At first he assumes it's because the man in question is so focused on activating the magic hat that he's neglected commanding Killian's heart to do his bidding. But he soon realises that it's gone a step further than that and the pirate has never in his life loved Emma Swan more than right at this moment because housed in her gentle hand, hidden between their bodies, is a glowing red heart. He had known of her thieving past, has been intrigued by it on many an occasion. But this is something else. This is pickpocketing from the most ruthless man they know.
His breathing is heavy and shallow all at once when he realises the danger Emma's put herself in, what she's used her magic for, but he can't help but marvel at her and wonder how he got so damn lucky. "You're bloody brilliant."
A smirk crosses her face but she ducks her head quickly, able to see over Killian's shoulder and know when the Dark One is looking their way. The façade of swirling patterns drops immediately and the pirate can finally see that they're in the abandoned manor again, the place where Emma almost lost her magic the last time.
A sweeping sound catches their attention and Killian has to fight the urge to turn around, hoping that the Crocodile doesn't realise that he no longer has control over the pirate. He knows that sound well, it has haunted his nightmares for weeks – the sweep and slide of magic being sucked away from this realm. He fears for Emma's life, but she seems to have other priorities. "We have to be quick," she whispers, "I'm sorry this is going to hurt."
He knows what she has to do, remembers the excruciating pain of having his heart removed and knows that she won't rest until it is back in his chest. He wants her to be fast, wants to get her out of here, so he encourages her with a soft, "It's okay love."
They both heave in deep breaths in preparation and then Emma's hand enters his chest. It's weird, having your heart returned to you, not at all like having it removed. He looks down at her wrist where it disappears into his chest and smiles. Her magic is surrounding the area, white and strong, keeping him safe from harm. He feels her fingers release his heart and gasps when her hand leaves him, emotions flooding back in fullness.
He can feel the pull of the hat behind him, knows that at any second now the Dark One is going to realise that Killian's heart is back where it belongs, realise that he can no longer complete his spell of darkness. Emma looks over to where the hat is taking form behind Killian, Rumpelstiltskin standing over it with his full attention directed at the magic, and knows that this is it, this is their moment of truth.
It feels like betrayal that she has to ask this question in the presence of someone else, but she knows it must be done, knows that she must be certain before she tries. She grabs a hold of his jacket lapels and looks him straight in the eye, "Do you love me?"
She sees the answer flash across his face before he says it and she catches his breathy, "Of course," as she leans into his welcoming kiss. The last thing she sees before she closes her eyes and gives herself over to the feelings coursing through her is Rumple looking up in horror, realising that Killian's heart is no longer where he left it. And then there is nothing – nothing but the sound of their beating hearts and a rushing in both their ears.
The magic builds rapidly, a fraction of a second passing before there is a burst of white light and a pulse that rolls through them and out into the night. The couple pulls apart, breathless and searching for the man who is behind all of this.
They can see him, standing behind the torrent of magic pouring from the hat on the floor, the wild tendrils of it travelling back to the bodies of those who it originally belonged to. Killian looks to Emma whose hands are glowing with the strength of her own magic, her stance suggesting she is ready to attack. But Rumpelstiltskin has always excelled at something other than being a villain and that is being a coward. With fear in his eyes, the Dark One runs.
And then, all so suddenly, it falls quiet, the hat on the ground rocking on its side, no longer full of magic and power – just a hat.
…
The don't talk about it until later that night, wrapped around each other on the couch as the last of the lights in the loft are switched off behind everyone else heading towards their respective beds.
"Well that certainly wasn't as bad as you had made it out to be in past conversation," Killian chuckles, remembering the night of their first official date and how Emma had seemed very reluctant to have the pirate come back into the loft considering the motley crew living there.
She smiles, brushing her lips to the underside of his jaw, "Well they have no choice now. We are kind of bound together."
"Ah, I wondered if we would ever speak of this connection."
She bites the inside of her cheek, sitting up to meet his eye, "I'm not sure it's something that can be spoken about." Her hand reaches out to his strong beating heart, pressing her fingers against his chest, "I've felt it. And I have no doubts."
His hand covers hers as he leans in to meet her half way. There is a crackle of electricity between them as the lamp at the foot of the couch flares and fades. Killian's fingers sweep over Emma's cheek, tucking locks of hair behind her ear and she has never felt more secure. She lets her lips fall open under his, allowing his tongue to sweep past and taste her kiss, their heads turning at the same moment to deepen their embrace.
Little pulses of energy continue to flow out of them, powerful and bright, reminding them of their victory today. The Dark One is still out there and they can only assume he will remain in hiding until he finds another way to use his power against them. But, for now, the town is relatively quiet, the magic of the realms returned to their original owners.
"You should get some sleep," Killian suggests as they break apart, foreheads resting together still, breath coming out in soft pants.
She bites her lip, looking up to catch his eye, "You should too." He nods, kissing her cheek and preparing himself for leave, but she holds tight to his hand and his hook, "Here. You should sleep here."
It takes him a moment to realise that she is embracing this quiet moment but, when he does, the smile on his face cannot be contained. Tomorrow there will be so much fall out to deal with, tomorrow she will be the saviour and he will be a hero, tomorrow they will fight for this town and its people. But tonight her hand rests on his chest, above his beating heart, and their love makes the light glow a little brighter wherever they let their bodies fall.
…
Thoughts?