What If?
By Jet Set Yoyo
Disclaimer: I don't own Alice or it's characters. Nor do I own Andrew-Lee Potts but I'm working on that one.
Summary: Hatter has never been the type of person to tell his thoughts to anyone but there's one thing lingering on his mind as Alice is about to depart Wonderland forever. He just can't seem to force himself to be honest for once.
Jet Set Yoyo: SO! I'm absolutely head-over-heels fro Andrew-Lee and I CANNOT get enough fanfics, pictures or the movie. I'm going nuts here xD. Enjoy this, I hope it's alright.
Hatter turned to leave; seeing Alice hugging Jack Heart, her ex-boyfriend, was too much for him. They'd been together for only a few days but the eccentric young man had fallen head over heels for this girl from another world, and it was the first time it'd ever happened.
Alice must've turned around, probably not to look for him, but she did and noticed him before calling out his name.
"Hatter!" she called out. The brunette turned around on his heel and jogged over to her, overjoyed she called for him even though he was just previously upset.
"Heey…" he said cheerily, though it was skillfully hiding his real emotions. "I was just- I was afraid I migh've missed you."
"Yeah well, you cut it a little close." Alice chided and his heart panged in his chest; he did. What if he really had missed her? He brushed it away, not wanting to think about it.
"Yeah, I was um…" he avoided eye contact with her for a moment before admitting, "Guess I was trying not to think about it- anyways, I wanted to say good-bye."
Alice gave him a weird look and he knew that she knew he was lying through his teeth. Especially with the careless admission just a moment ago that he failed miserably in writing off.
"Good-bye?" Alice questioned, as if waiting for more but Hatter didn't take the hint. Or rather he did partly but was still afraid to admit his feelings; it was never an easy thing for him. Lying was second nature but being honest and giving up a personal part of him was going too far and he just couldn't make himself do it. No matter how much he really wanted to.
"And if you, you know, ever fancy comin' back-" Hatter began but Alice cut him off abruptly.
"You want me to stay?" She asked, her voice sounded hopeful and it flustered him.
Taken aback the frazzle-haired man blurted out, "Hell no! No you should go home."
Alice's expression was unreadable for a moment, though she was smiling at him. He kept eye contact with her, searching for something; for anything.
"Yeah, I've had enough of Wonderland for a lifetime." His heart sunk; those weren't the words he wanted to hear, not at all.
"Yes I'm sure you have, right?" He wasted no time in continuing the conversation. Even if it broke him into teeny-tiny pieces he'd never let her know he was hurt or disappointed; no, Alice could do as she pleased. He only wished she would choose him. She chuckled and he found a little strength to continue, to turn the conversation a different way. "Still we had a laugh. You know, had some good times. Obviously, among all the bad times."
He was losing his control, his emotions getting the better of him and steering his mouth to make the conversation bad again. He was trying to be cheerful, stay cheerful, so that Alice wouldn't feel upset or hurt or guilty when she left him. He wouldn't ever want her to hurt because of him; he could keep his thoughts to himself unless she wished them. A quick smile tried to cover up and lead the conversation somewhere else again.
"Yeah, yeah we did." Alice smiled back before looking down and noticing his coat she was still wearing. God, he loved her smile. If only he could capture that in a bottle and keep it forever, he'd be the happiest man alive.
He was surprised when she started to remove the plum coat he'd given her when they'd first met. After trying to assure her it was alright if she kept it, in fact he'd prefer if she kept it so that she'd have something left of him when she left, she took it off anyway and handed it over. He felt another pang of pain in his chest but of course he wasn't going to show her the least bit of it. He initiated a brief and awkward hug.
"You know you could always visit my world, you might like it." She suggested.
"Yeah. We could do pizza." Now his mind was reeling, he was most certainly running out of time but he just couldn't make himself say it; he just couldn't. How could he be babbling about something so insignificant as pizza when all he wanted was to let her know she meant the world to him. The 'L' word was something he'd never really used before, not having known his parents for most of his life, and no one else in Wonderland was special enough to have gotten so close to him.
Moments later a technician and grasped Alice by the arm, letting her know the Looking Glass was ready and led her over to it. She made no move to stop the man, only looking back once before she stood in front of the massive mirror. Hatter was frozen in fear, at least he thought it was fear because he couldn't make out all the mixed emotions bubbling up inside him. He heard in a far-off sort of way the technician instructing Alice to remember to breathe.
"Alice!" He cried out, his eyes wide still from the shock of her being taken away from him too soon. "Don't leave me…"
Alice seemed to have heard him, but the technician had already pushed her in. As she slipped inside she looked as if she was turning around in the process but in seconds she was gone; gone forever. He swallowed, his saliva suddenly thick in his throat and the backs of his eyes were on fire. When the realization that she was gone, gone and never coming back, kicked in he sunk to his knees letting his tears free for the first time in years. The other oysters looked at him, some in confusion and some in sympathy, but none moved from their spots.
"Alice…" he whispered with his fists clenched against the ground as his hot tears fell to the floor below him. "I need you."
He was still kneeling there long after all the other Oysters had been sent off. The suits and previous casino workers had all decided to leave him be for a while and left as well until one-by-one everyone had disappeared. With a sniffle he sat upright, his knees were on fire from staying like that for so long but he didn't care. His hat had fallen from his head and lay neglected on the ground in front of him. Picking up his most prized possession, he plopped it back on his head with indifference as it lay crooked where he'd put it. From there he brushed off his pants, then his hands together before walking back to his decimated shop in the darkness of Wonderland's nights.
Don't know if this will be continued or if it'll stay a oneshot. This was merely just an idea that popped into my head while I was listening to What If by Safety Suit. I like to daydream while I walk to work and right now I've been dreaming of Hatter. :3 Reviews please? And whether or not you think there should be more?