Together At Last
A/N: An unintended sequel to Stay with Me.
Summary: Charles is fully recovered from the Spanish Flu but his heart may never be the same.
Charles Carson looked down at his hands, truly studying them as if they belonged to someone else. When did that brown spot appear on his left hand? Why hadn't he noticed the new wrinkles on both hands? If he closed his eyes, he could still feel her small, soft hand holding his as his fever had ravaged his body. He could still feel her thumb stroking the back of his hand soothingly while her words caressed his ears, assuring him he would be fine and he'd be back on his feet in no time, after he'd had a good rest. He had drifted in and out of his uneasy sleep listening to that sweet, soft voice, marveling all the while that she was still there, still with him.
A part of him wanted to believe her words, wanted to open his eyes and offer her some glimmer of hope that perhaps his fever was close to breaking. He wanted to open his eyes and see her face, her eyes staring back into his. One look at her and he would know his fate. But, try as he might, he could do little more than groan which only caused her more dismay. She wiped his brow, his hands, his neck … made certain he stayed tucked tightly beneath those oppressive blankets, and he couldn't even manage to open his eyes to look at her, move his head to follow the sound of her voice, or to move his parched lips to express his heartfelt thanks.
Now, as he sat in his office staring at his hands and thinking back on those days of his illness, he couldn't help but think of how much she had done for him. Not only had she looked after him, made sure he was comfortable, cared for, healing, she had taken care of "his family" as well. She had made certain that the household ran as normally as possible under the circumstances. She had kept everything running despite the additional stresses and duties which faced her. He had always known he could rely on her and trust her to keep up the standards at Downton, and she had met the challenge with strength, dignity, and decisiveness, all traits he greatly admired in her.
His thoughts floated back to the present. He'd been thinking for weeks on some way he could express his appreciation to her for all she had done for him. He'd tried to verbally tell her his feelings but he felt he had fallen short each and every time. Elsie had assured him that she was pleased he'd made such a quick recovery and that she was only too happy to be there for him. Sometimes, he even started to believe that she only took care of him because it was part of her job. Then, she would offer him a smile or a look at a meal or speak softly to him as they shared a glass of wine, and he would be reminded that she could have easily delegated the duty of refilling his water pitcher or taking up his food and medicine to someone else, anyone else, some footman or perhaps even Anna. But, she'd not chosen to do that. She had stayed with him, looked after him, cared for him until he was able to take care of himself. And that had prompted him to truly examine his feelings for her, take a good look at what was in his heart.
They both were due a half day off and Charles hoped he could convince Elsie to spend her time with him. There was the possibility that she had other plans, but Charles would never know until he asked. If she agreed, he would worry about making plans then. It wouldn't do to arrange an outing when he wasn't even assured that Elsie would be available. So, he waited until after everyone had gone to bed and they were sharing a glass of wine before broaching the subject with her.
"Mrs. Hughes … Elsie, If you haven't any plans for your day off tomorrow, I would enjoy your company, though I will understand if you have made other plans."
Elsie looked up at him over the top of her glass, trying to steady her heartbeat and give him an answer without appearing too eager. After all, she was certain he was only asking because it pertained somehow to the house, to their work. He'd never asked her on an outing before. "I have made no plans that cannot be put off for a day or two. I would love to accompany you, though might I ask where we're going?"
Charles felt his cheeks begin to burn a little, mentally scolding himself for not having an answer for her. He should have known that she would want to know some details about their upcoming afternoon and yet he had no answer to give her. "I would prefer to tell you tomorrow, if that's acceptable to you."
She took a long sip of her wine and her eyes seemed to brighten a little. "I trust you, Mr. Carson, and I'm sure tomorrow will be most agreeable. Will we be eating lunch here and then going? I only ask so that I might inform Anna in the morning that we're both to be gone."
"Why don't we grab something in the village, a sandwich or something? That will give us more time away from the house, and we rarely get an opportunity to share quiet meals at Downton."
That night, Elsie had the most vivid dreams centering around outings with Charles and the things they might encounter, the things they might do. She woke several times from her slumber feeling a mixture of emotions based on her vivid imagination.
Little did she know that just a few small steps away, Charles Carson had yet to fall asleep. Instead of being visited in his dreams by happy thoughts of Elsie, images he'd seen before though never truly dared believe could become a reality, he was wide awake thinking of her. He'd asked her to spend her free time with him and it was almost morning and he still hadn't settled on a plan of action, other than stopping at the tea shop for some sandwiches.
When he finally did manage settle his mind enough to sleep, it was as if his subconscious took over and a beautiful plan emerged in vivid details. With all his barriers and worries far from the forefront of his mind, he was able to dream, and when he woke, he knew he had the means and the power to make that dream come true.
Their morning seemed to pass in a blur. Elsie was constantly reminded of her dreams. One whiff of his cologne sent her mind reeling, her pulse racing, images appearing unbidden before her eyes. She had to get herself under control before they left for the afternoon. He'd given her no reason to believe this was anything more than two colleagues sharing an afternoon together, though she had to admit that since his brush with the Spanish flu, she had been more aware of her attraction to him and his invasion into her dreams. The fact that he had thanked her more than once only served as a reminder that he thought of her only as the housekeeper, nothing more, nothing less.
Before lunch was ever served in the servants dining room, Charles and Elsie were on their way to the village. He still hadn't shared his idea with her, but there would be plenty of time for that. And, if she disliked his idea for their afternoon, he had an alternative plan in mind.
Elsie would have to admit, she was more than a little curious about the afternoon ahead. Charles had said something about getting sandwiches from a tea shop, but he hadn't made any mention of where they'd eat, how they'd spend the remainder of the afternoon.
With the large house and all of their official duties behind them, Charles stole a glance at Elsie and offered her his arm, which she took without a moment's hesitation. Charles caught her eyes with his and smiled. "I thought we could pick up our lunch and then there's somewhere I'd like to take you."
"All this secrecy, Mr. Carson! Are you planning to steal me away on a holiday? If so, you should have given me time to pack a bag," she teased, hoping to see him smile. She was not disappointed.
With the more relaxed atmosphere, he slowed his steps a bit, focusing on the easy conversation and the delightful company. He guided them into the village and to the little shop where they each chose a sandwich and some fruit, then were on their way once more.
"I thought we could take our lunch somewhere a bit out of the way to eat. There's somewhere that I've wanted to take you, Mrs. Hughes, and today felt like the right time."
"Mr. Carson, I am certain that whatever you have in mind will be lovely." She reached over and gave his arm a light squeeze. "So, are you going to tell me where we're going?"
He laughed softly. "Up ahead … on the left."
Elsie stopped and looked from the building then back to Charles. "That's … that's the Royal Greenhouse for the village. I thought only the gentry were permitted to visit unless there was some official ceremony."
He reached out and looped her arm through his as they walked with more purpose towards the greenhouse. "Under normal circumstances, that would be the case. However, today is not a normal sort of occasion. Today, you and I are going to have our lunch inside the greenhouse among all the lovely blooming plants and flowers. I thought it might be nice and something a little out of the ordinary."
"I'll say," she exclaimed, though with a bright smile on her face. "And here I was thinking we'd end up eating our lunch outside where it's a bit damp and chilly. I never dreamed I'd be taking my lunch in a tropical paradise."
"Never let it be said that Charles Carson doesn't know how to plan a surprise," he teased. He lifted the mat at the entrance of the greenhouse and removed the key to unlock the door, swinging it open and letting her step into the warmth.
"How on earth did you ever manage this, Mr. Carson?"
He closed the door behind him and led her to a little bench hidden away in the center of the greenhouse and which faced some rather fragrant flowers in a wide variety of colors. "Please, call me Charles, and I would consider it a great honor if you'd allow me to call you Elsie," he added with a bit of hesitance.
"Yes, yes of course you may. I'd like that very much, Charles." She patted the bench beside her and began to unwrap her sandwich and his.
"The butler at the Hawthorne estate is the keeper of the keys to the greenhouse and he asked me a few weeks back about purchasing a few bottle of our special wine from France. I had put him off, but then I realized that we might be able to strike a deal. I give him a few bottles of our wine from the cellar and he gives Downton some flowers for our dinner party tomorrow evening."
Elsie felt her heart drop a little. So, he wanted her here to help choose flowers that would be appropriate for the linens, and of course he'd need someone to help him carry them back home again. She sighed and tucked into her sandwich, wondering why she'd let herself get so caught up in the idea that this was more than a business outing.
Charles sensed something was wrong and began to replay the conversation in his mind. They'd been having a lovely time until he said … "Oh, Elsie, it seems you've misunderstood me entirely, and I do apologize."
Elsie turned sharply and looked him squarely in the eyes. "Mr. Car … Charles … it was not your fault. I am the one that made assumptions. I should be apologizing to you." She folded the paper back over her sandwich and placed it off to the side. "Of course, I will help you choose the flowers for tomorrow's party and then we can head home. But, you needn't have gone to the trouble of the lunch outing and making me think …" She paused before she said something more, something that couldn't be taken back and which would most assuredly change the way he acted around her.
Charles saw that as his opportunity. "No, again, you misunderstand me, Elsie. YOU are the reason for the outing today. YOU are the sole reason I asked you to accompany me for sandwiches, and YOU are the reason we're sitting here in this greenhouse. The wine, the flowers, and the greenhouse were all a means to an end." He placed his sandwich off to the side and reached out to take her hand in his, much like she had done when he'd been ill. He brushed his thumb along the back of her hand while never breaking eye contact with her. "I've been trying for weeks to find a way to say a few things to you and every time I start, we end up speaking so formally about my illness and you being so kind in taking care of me."
"I did what any good friend would do, any good housekeeper too, for that matter."
"You did more than that, Elsie. You didn't have to sit with me, reassure me, comfort me. Unless I am mistaken, in which case I will look a silly old fool, you did not do those things solely because it was your job. I like to think you took such good care of me because you cared for me." He paused, letting his words sink in and to give her time to rebut them. "I could hear you, you know. I could feel your hand on mind, and I could hear every single word, even the softly spoken ones whispered in prayers for my return to health. I thought, once, that I even heard you crying a little, though that was when my fever was at its highest."
Elsie gasped and used her free hand to cover her mouth. "You heard all of that? I wasn't sure if you even knew I was there. I didn't leave your side for a moment during that day and a half. And then, when you were well and didn't mention it, I assumed you hadn't heard me so there was no reason to bring it up again."
"I heard it, Elsie, and hearing your voice telling me all would be well was the best comfort of all. If I'd been left alone, who knows what might have happened to me?"
She gave his hand a squeeze and smiled softly. "But you weren't and we're here now, though I'm still confused. Would you care to explain things?"
He captured her other hand in his, holding both hands between them. "I brought you here to tell you that I would like to start walking out with you, Elsie Hughes. Times are changing, much to my chagrin, but there are some rules that should be changed. I want to be able to take all of my half days with you, to properly escort you to church on Sundays, to know that I can call you mine and that you will call me yours. I haven't mentioned any of this to his Lordship, though, since I felt it only right to talk to you first." He took a steadying breath and steeled his nerves. "Elsie, I am asking for permission to love you and one day, when we're ready, to make you mine."
Elsie sat speechless, though she felt so excited by his words that she might nearly burst. "Then, let's consider this our first outing as a couple, shall we? We can always look back and remember the day we broke all sorts of rules of propriety, first with the entry into the greenhouse under false pretenses and then to declaring our mutual love for one another." She watched his face to gauge his reaction to her thinly veiled declaration of love.
"Are you saying what I think you're saying Elsie? Are you saying that …"
"I'm saying that I would love nothing more than to be courted by you, to spend all of my free time with you, and most importantly, to call you mine, Charles Carson. And one day, when we're both ready, I want to make you mine as well."
He released her hands and pulled her against his chest, With only a little hesitancy, he closed the distance between them and brushed his lips against hers, sweetly, softly, slowly. He pulled back and rested his forehead against hers as she lightly caressed his cheek with her fingertips.
"I was so scared when you were ill, Charles. Her Ladyship and Miss Swire were so sick and their health changed so quickly, I was afraid the same would happen to you in the middle of the night, when you were alone and unable to call for help. I couldn't leave you, not knowing what might happen."
"You could have fallen ill, too, you know," he added after pressing his lips to her forehead and tucking her head beneath his chin as he held her.
"I wasn't thinking of myself, only you. If something had happened to you, this entire house would have fallen apart, especially me. We all love you and rely on you for so many things and it wasn't until you fell sick that I realized how much I'd miss you and how much important you truly are in my life."
"I felt the same way. That's what I've been trying to tell you every time I mentioned you caring for me. I just never found the right way to say these things to you until today."
"I'm glad you waited until today. This is a lovely start to things, wouldn't you say?"
"I would, indeed. Now, let's finish our sandwiches and then we can stroll through the greenhouse and you can choose any flower you'd like for your very own. It will be my first official gift to you to mark the happy day," he said with a boyish smile.
Elsie laughed and reached out to touch his arms. "And what if I decide to choose something other than a flower, a tree or a shrub perhaps? Might I have that instead?"
"Of course you can, though wouldn't you prefer flowers, something pretty to brighten your office or your bedroom?"
She shook her head and smiled. "I would like something to nurture until spingtime, and then I'd like us to take a half day or maybe even a whole day off together so we can choose a little spot on the estate and plant it together. It can be a nice little spot that is all ours, some place we can call our special spot and it will always have a reminder of this day." She bit her bottom lip and looked up at him through her lashes. "What do you think?"
He closed the distance between them and kissed her once more. "I think that's a lovely idea. I only ask that we choose something that blooms. I'd like some sort of flower that we could bring back to our rooms when we visit our special place."
She snuggled into his arms and sighed softly. "I think that can be arranged, though right now, I think I'd like to stay just where I am. We can choose something before we leave and even eat our sandwiches on the way back to Downton."
Charles tightened his arms around her and dropped a kiss to the top of her head. "We have plenty of time, and I hope you'll join me this evening for our after dinner wine."
Elsie tightened her arms around him and snuggled deeper into his embrace. "I would say it would be the highlight of my day, but I think it's going to be hard to beat this time together now."
His deep voice rumbled through his chest and into her sending shivers down her body. "Don't count me out yet, Elsie. I might be older and a little more cautious, but I do know how to appreciate the finer things in life, and I am going to make sure we both enjoy every moment together."
"I'm going to hold you to that promise, Charles Carson, and I know I won't be disappointed." She shifted against him and raised her head to kiss him softly on the lips. "I love you, Charles."
He inhaled the scent of lavender from her hair and smiled. "I love you, too, Elsie."
A few moments later, they finally broke apart and began searching the greenhouse, hand in hand, for their special plant to commemorate the beginning of the rest of their lives.
The End
A/N 2: Thank you so much for reading. I would appreciate it if you'd take time to review. They make me happy and help breed plot bunnies. ^_^