Author's Note:

My first ever story. This takes place after Sonny With A Choice.

Disclaimer:

I don't own Sonny With A Chance, even though I asked my dad to gift it to me, he never did =( Anyways, atleast i own this story! :)

"I can't believe it..Im so stupid. All I wanted was for both of us to be happy, but it seems like everything I try to do makes everything worse. I don't care about Mackenzie Falls or that Tween's Choice Awards. All I ever really cared about is Sonshine and how much I love her. I can't believe that I gave her up for that stupid award. I…I shouldn't have asked for a recount…I…I shouldn't have been so stupid to think I was doing it for our relationship. Id rather be fired from Mackenzie Falls than lose Sonny. I…I love her so much, but now…now she hates me."

Chad is in his dressing room, lost in thoughts. He is still in shock, this time, not about losing to So Random!, but because he messed things up; He messed up his relationship with Sonny, the one he loved the most. He has been here for five days; not going to rehearsals or going home, He won't even eat or move from this spot. He was in the exact same position he was at after his break up with Sonny.

His eyes were sore and puffy from crying, His skin pale and dull, His hair messier than ever, and his once ocean blue eyes is now a dull blue.

He reminisced every single memory he has of Sonny; their first date, their second first date, their memories as a couple and even the moments they shared when they aren't a couple yet. Until, his mind reached the memory of when Sonny and he broke up.

Flashback

"Hey, what's up Randoms? Enjoying this fine day?" he said while walking towards Nico and Grady.

"Oh hey there, Chad Dylan Chipper." Sonny said while walking towards him.

"Oh that I am, that I am. I figured out how to solve our little problem."

"Oh, great. Hey guys, could you give us like five minutes?"

"Sure. Hey, who wants to take a taxi ride to see where they make Chad park his car now?" Zora said, convincing the others to give Sonny and Chad some alone time. All of them bursted out laughing, except for Sonny, who was looking at Chad weirdly because he was laughing at Zora's insult.

"It's funny 'cause it's true." Said Chad, humor evident in his voice.

"Wow, you're being an awfully good sport."

"Ahw, there's no reason not to be. Like I said, I've been thinking about what you said, about how I'm letting So Random's winning get between us. I want to fix that."

"See, I knew you'd get past this." Sonny said, happy that her boyfriend's finally accepted their shows first ever victory against Mackenzie Falls in five years.

"I had to. For us."

"Gosh. It..It just feels so good to hear that coming from you. You know, some silly award shouldn't get between us."

"I totally agree. That's why I ordered a recount of the votes for Best Tween Show." Sonny's smile suddenly disappeared.

"You did what now?"

"Ordered a recount. Oh, great news, So Random, lost." He said, emphasizing on the lost. Sonny suddenly looked away, realizing what was really happening.

"I can't believe this." Sonny's tone suddenly became serious.

"What, that you lost? Oh, don't worry about it, you'll get used to it. I did."

"No you didn't. You ordered a recount, Chad. Why would you even think about doing that?" Sonny said, standing up. Chad stood up after she did.

"You felt weird about winning, I felt weird about losing. And now, thanks to me, we don't have to feel weird anymore."

Sonny just looked at him, disappointed look on her face.

"But you do have a very weird look on your face." Chad said, confused why his girlfriend wasn't happy.

"It's called disappointment, Chad. You were so miserable that you weren't the center of attention for one day that you went out and ordered a recount?"

"Whoa. Oh..okay, I just wanted things to go back to normal, like I promised."

"Normal? Oh you mean the normal where you always win and I always lose? I don't like that normal. Boyfriends and Girlfriends are supposed to support each other, root for each other. You know, I can't be in a relationship with someone who always puts himself first."

"Oh, I did this for us." He said with a slightly loud voice.

"No, Chad." Sonny grabbed the award. "The only 'us' there is now, is between you and this award. I hope you two will be very happy together."

"Sorry, are you breaking up with me, 'cause I thought I was helping."

"That's the worst part about it. Goodbye Chad."

"Sonny, don't do this…"

"No…Just go."

"But, I just…I just…"

"Chad, there are no second chances this time. I'm sorry. You won the recount, but you lost me." The situation finally sank in to Chad. He looked at her again, and then he placed the award at the table beside them and headed out of the prop house. He looked at Sonny one more time. Sonny just looked away. And with that, Chad finally left.

End Flashback

The memory was taunting him. Suddenly, his head throbbed, his heart pounded fast, his jaws clenched and his fists are forming. He knew it was his fault. He rushed to the bathroom, his knees wriggling from the lack of energy.

He was tired, but all he can feel right now is anger. He is angry with himself. He reached for the medicine cabinet and started over-dosing himself with medicines. Then, he reached for the long razor and started cutting himself. His cut went in so deep, but instead of feeling pain, he felt pleasure. He was pleased to see himself getting hurt. He added more cuts until he had five deep and bleeding cuts on his wrist, it was so deep that he'd lose enough blood to die in a few hours. He sat on his bathroom floor, and suddenly he felt weaker and weaker. He fell unconscious on the floor and it created a loud "thump".

Cliffy! =) I meant for this to be much longer, i hope i can put the next chapter by tomorrow. Love? Like? Hate? Bored? Rate and tell me what you think.