So I did not get married to Jeremiah. I went back to school, and studied hard. Because that was all I focused on. I missed them. I missed Beck's boys. I had hurt them both in so many ways to count. I found myself crying at night just because I missed their voices. I missed Jeremiah's face and Conrad's rare laugh, but they had both let me go that day.
Jeremiah and I still went to the same school, we passed occasionally and I would give him a hug. Those moments were rare, I would see that the love he had for me had faded, though he still cared for me. Eventually, we became friends again. We would go get coffee and he would tell me about his life, but it never went farther than that. I missed him as a friend, because my whole childhood he was my best friend.
We never really talked about what happened between us, and maybe it was for the best. We loved each other; I just did not love him with all of me. I understood that. I respected that. I missed him, I missed the way he used to hold me, kiss me, but I let that go. He was a friend, nothing more. He would always be my best friend, though, we grew up together. He was my first kiss. He was my first everything, except for one thing. He was not my first love, and that was the thing that got in the way. Jeremiah Fisher was a piece of me, always.
In junior year I left for Spain. It was the most amazing time of my life. I saw and learned so many things. Spain was what I needed, a clean slate. That's when I got the letter from Conrad. It just said he missed me. He told me how Medical School was going. He asked me how I was. I had not seen Conrad since the almost wedding, so I did not return the letter until a month after he sent it.
I answered all of his questions. I told him congrats on Medical School, he will be an amazing doctor. I told him I was alright, in Spain, obviously. I also told him I missed him too, because it was the truth. I missed him so much it hurt to be honest. Him and Jeremiah, I missed more than anything.
We exchanged letter after letter, and I felt all the love I had for him start to dig its way up again. But it was not till graduation till it reached the surface. When they called my name, I searched the crowd, and there he was. Right next to my mom, he was older, but still Conrad. He was smiling proudly, and I smiled back. It was that smile that made me realize, this guy is the one.
We talked for hours that night, at my graduation party. We went down to the beach and just sat there for hours. That night he kissed me goodnight, at first I thought it was all a mistake, but then I realized this is how it's meant to happen. I had to take some time and grow up. I had to take time away from Beck's boys and focus on me, Belly. But now it was time, time for me to be happy.
After that night, we began dating. I went to California a few times, and he came to me too. This time it was all true. He did not lie to me about the way he felt, he was not protecting anyone. It was just me and him. Then a year later, he proposed.
At first I wanted to say no, as I thought of my last almost wedding. But then I looked into his eyes and knew that I had to say yes, that this is the way things were meant to be. Our wedding was everything I wanted when I got married. It was on the beach, yes, but I got the carrot cake and the song I wanted. We got married that day, after I read Susannah's letter, I knew it was meant to be. We got married and swam in the ocean. Then danced at our reception. I saw Jeremiah that day too, luckily, he made up with his brother, he smiled at me, and at the reception we danced. He told me that night, he whispered in my ear: "Belly, I am happy for you. I really am. Maybe it was meant to be like this. Just know that I will always love you, but more as in a best friend/brother kind of way," Jeremiah said.
I gave him a smile then kissed his cheek. "Always, if you ever need me, I am here. You should be happy too Jere, you deserve it too," I told him.
He nodded and twirled me around. "I am working on that one," Jere said. And just like that the song was over. "He'll treat you right, belly button." I laughed, I hated when he called me that but today it really did not matter.
"He will, now go dance with your date," I ordered him.
"Yes ma'am," he replied then walked away. He was my best friend, forever and always.
But Conrad, he was my other half, my soul mate.