Salvation

Even in death she felt Valtiel's fingers digging into her as he dragged her down to the depths. Valtiel's fingers, the cold fingers of death, the fingers of her God still writhing in her stomach. She could see nothing. She could hear nothing. She never thought there could be an absence of taste without any flavor upon her tongue, but there was. She could smell, though. The acrid scent of burning flesh. Just like that night; she'd thought she'd take the memory of that horrible smell to the grave.

She'd been right.

She seemed to numb. The feeling of Valtiel's fingers - iron, cold, angry, like her father's - faded away into nothingness, while the smell grew worse and worse. She had no power to stop it invading her nostrils, her mind, her very will. She tried to struggle, but could not. She must have still had a body for how else could she smell? But she felt nothing outside her increasing urge to stem the horrible smell. She was denied even the chance to gag. She had no breath to hold and no muscles to do so. Her mind began to pulse with panic. She had to make the smell stop. Was there nothing she could do?

"This is your punishment, Claudia."

If she could have looked, she still wouldn't have. That voice. She'd know it for all of eternity.

Father. The smell seemed to recede slightly. Perhaps it was only because she had something else to focus her attention on.

"Is this the salvation you seek?" The voice was full of the same cruel disappointment it had been in life. "No. You have failed in your foolish endeavors, and now God is punishing you."

No.

"Failure."

No.

She turned her attention back to the smell. Anything would be better than listening to the ravings of this man who'd never loved her. The scent had receded further.

"You failed to serve. Your foolish ideas nearly destroyed everything."

She realized she was beginning to hear again. Aside from her father's callous voice. Far away sounds of screaming. The distant roar of flames. They crept closer, and as they did her skin began to feel hot. An overwhelming sense of sorrow engulfed her. Is this my hell? Please, forgive me! I have failed! I couldn't bring paradise to mankind.

"Still preaching that rubbish, you hardheaded girl." His voice began to grow faint. "You've amounted to nothing."

No. The sound of flames grew closer. No, father, don't leave me! Don't leave me alone here!

The thickness of his cold amusement silenced her. "Have some shame. You're no daughter of mine." And then he was gone. A heavy presence that she had never noticed before disappeared. She felt empty. If she had eyes to cry, or a mouth to scream, she would have let her pain escape her. She had neither. And yet... She could see.

In the corner of her vision, the flickering of orange flames. The sound grew more clear, crackling, popping. The smell of burning timber. The taste of ash flooded her mouth. The feeling of heat on her skin. And there, mere feet away, was Alessa. Claudia stepped forward. Her feet were bare against the cool ground. She was amazed by the sight of the dark haired angel in front of her. The other woman's face openly displayed sympathy, kindness, love. So familiar. And her hand rested on her stomach, heavy and round.

Claudia's breath hitched. She fell to her knees in front at Alessa's feet, and reached out one shaking hand to barely stroke the belly. Tears dribbled down her cheeks and chin and she sobbed.

"Claudia."

Alessa carefully dropped to her own knees. She took the weeping woman's face in her hands and stroked away the tears. Claudia face contorted and she grabbed Alessa's hands.

"You won't leave me. Don't send me back there. Don't leave me alone!" She found she could say no more. She didn't know how to ask this angel of mercy for forgiveness. She stared, nothing more than a hopeless child, begging with her eyes. Alessa smiled. She leaned forward and joined their lips, her awkward belly pressing into Claudia. Then, struggling a bit, she was stood again. Claudia followed suit, her tears a cooling relief.

"Claudia. It's time to go home."

There were no words to say. Alessa took Claudia's hand into her own and led her toward the burning Gillespie house.

Neither looked back as they stepped through the door together.

end