Saying this once, the Teen Titans aren't mine, neither is anything affiliated with that, etc, etc.

She always woke up with a start - she woke up like that first breath of air was a jolt to her heart. Nightmares came with the territory, unfortunately. Those nightmares had a gentle ebb and flow. Those nightmares were inconsistent to her, but they probably acted on some impulse, something that was consistent to anyone but Raven. Whatever their patterns, the one thing Raven knew is she could not escape them. Her dreams had been showing a favorable emptiness, a sleek slate that let her sleep without anxiety.

But here they were, back again.

When she looked at her hands, she expected to see the marks from two years ago there, still. Even without the yelling red, she felt their weight. Raven felt it every damn day, she felt it most thickly with dreams like this. Her fists were concrete and her powers were like a thick tar that spread over the land when she tried to attack anything. They congealed over her team mates, leaving them hapless and drowning. Raven, Robin called at her, why did you do this to us? We're a team! She wanted to sputter out that she knew this, that she was just trying to help, but her lips felt chapped and her lungs were empty.

She couldn't breathe then, she started to choke and -

That's where she woke up, with no sign of redemption in sight. Her skin felt slick with a thin layer of sweat and she could feel her blood pounding in her temples. Her heartbeat's speed was unstoppable and her breathing tripped along after it. There wasn't enough air in the world. Her hands clutched the covers tight for some support. By now she knew there was no use in trying to comfort herself, trying to out maneuver what her unconscious had thrown her way. It was all about riding it out, waiting for the storm to pass and the waves to die down so she could walk away from this hell of a beach.

It wasn't working as well as she would've liked it to today - until she found something else to clutch onto. It curled down the hall, floated through her door lackadaisically. Thump of a mutant's heartbeat: Beast Boy's snoring. Loud, pressing, and omnipotent in the iconic T. It was steady and made it obvious that someone was getting sleep around here. Something about that noise calmed her, at least enough to where oxygen was efficient again. But her mind wouldn't be set at ease.

Raven pulled herself out of bed, walked over to her vanity table. There was the mirror, right where it always was. Heavy pewter fitted with gems like the one on her forehead. She picked it up in a thin hand, smiling when she felt the familiar weight in her hand. Without thinking too hard about it, she was softly pulled into Nevermore. She floated over an immense library, full of books that she had read at one point or another. She stored them here, in her mind, in case she ever needed them. Raven took her time moving through Nevermore's open atmosphere; it was early morning back at home and Raven knew she wouldn't be falling asleep again.

Two aisles adjoined, forming a large meadow of bookshelves. It was mostly dark on the library's floor, minus one green lampshade between two cross-legged girls. Books were piled wildly between them and to the untrained eye they seemed very unorganized. Not the case, not the case at all. Raven slowed herself, landed softly on the outskirts of their fervent reading. Her cloak-clad emotions looked strange next to her, in her pajama shorts and loose-fitting tank top.

"Reading in the dark is bad for you," Raven said flatly.

"We know," Knowledge said with a bemused smile "but we have more important things to deal with."

"Like your question," said Wisdom, and her voice sounded like warm honey. "Ask it, already." Wisdom didn't have time for beating around the bush.

"Fair enough," the actual Raven said under her breath. "Am I still under my dad's power? Will I... Will I always be like that?"

The answer wasn't pretty, but all three of them had known that before the actual Raven even really asked it. Wisdom chewed her lip. "Of course. You already knew that." She felt pity for herself.

"But that's what makes you so powerful!" Knowledge cried, a bit louder than she meant to. The actual Raven and Wisdom both shushed her harshly. This was a library, after all. "Superbia, hubris," she continued, her voice more hushed. "The most powerful of the sins. We may see ourselves as sins, but at least we're the most powerful...!" Her eyes looked wistful. Raven could rip several universes apart at the seams, she could tear them asunder like cheap fabric. There was something very exciting and wonderful about that, to Knowledge. That kind of power was almost impossible, and it dizzied her with it's intelligence and thickness.

The actual Raven narrowed her actual eyes. "Keep Happiness from interfering with Knowledge," she said seriously.

The remaining emotion nodded solemnly. "Truer words have never been spoken," she sounded like a true patron for the arts.

Raven rolled her eyes and sighed heavily, beginning to levitate and rise from the library floor. "You guys have been..." she paused, fishing for the right word.

"Sufficiently unhelpful?" Knowledge quipped.

"...right." Her voice was quite dry. Raven was further up now and Knowledge's voice just passed her softly. It was true though; this hadn't been very helpful at all.

Back in her favorite dimension, it took a few minutes for her carpet to feel real under her bare feet and then Raven went about getting ready for the day. She brushed her unruly hair; having it short a year or two ago had been very ideal, but it had grown tiring to see the same face everyday. That face held things she wanted to forget, and with time her bones shifted underneath her pale skin but the same eyes always stared back. She might as well change her hair to make up for it. Now it fell just past her shoulders, as pin straight as it had always been. Everything else was more or less the same so the routine never differed from day to day.

Raven's nightmare still hung here, though. Leaving this place hadn't made them disappear into the air and the fear instilled in Raven's heart was very palpable. Her hands trembled just slightly, and her breathing varied from too slow to too shallow. Raven refused to let the feelings take advantage of her. The door opened with ease, and she was surprised to see Beast Boy just a few feet from her. He'd been walking to breakfast too, and he slowed his pace when he saw her, letting her fall in to step next to him. He may talk too much most of the time, but the teen knew when to be quiet and Raven really appreciated that right now... Maybe he was just incredibly tired though.

It was the tired bit, she decided suddenly - when she saw him look at her trembling hands out of the corner of her eye. Beast Boy's jaw went slack for a second like he was about to say something, but she quickly hid them in her cloak and walked a bit faster, outpacing him. Concern rolled off him in waves, but she pulled up a mental barrier to it. Don't bother asking, I won't tell you. Her thoughts weren't rough and she knew he couldn't hear her but it was more or less a statement she threw out to the universe.

Every bit of me is a secret, and I won't tell you why.

A/N: Yo, Hi, and so begins my first fic. No idea how this will go but if you're reading this, thanks for joining the ride! (That's actually a complete lie, this should be between 20-25 chapters and I have the whole thing planned out. But still. Thanks for joining the ride!)