I stayed in the shadow of the trees as Edward disappeared with Seth. I looked at Bella, seeing her clear as day, wanting her to make her decision now. I knew she couldn't quite see me, but I didn't care. I was trying to make a plan to make her choose me, or at least see that she did love me.

"I'm in a hurry, Bella," I said dully. "Why don't you just get it over with?"

I was pretty damn sure she was just doing to say goodbye to me. I couldn't make her choose me, or say that she loves me like I know she does. This was it.

She swallowed hard, and I kept on waiting, getting more annoyed by the second.

"Just say the words, and be done with it," I said to her, hoping she couldn't hear the acid I let leak into my voice.

She took a deep breath, and I braced myself for the goodbye. Why did it keep getting harder and harder to say goodbye to her?

She didn't say what I expected her to say.

"I'm sorry I'm such a rotten person," she whispered. What the hell? Why was she apologizing? "I'm sorry I've been so selfish. I wish I'd never met you, so I couldn't hurt you the way I have. I won't do it anymore, I promise. I'll stay far away from you. I'll move out of the state. You won't have to look at me ever again."

I didn't really care about the pain she'd caused me. I tried to keep my expression calm as I made up a plan.

"That's not much of an apology," I said bitterly.

She was still whispering when she spoke. "Tell me how to do it right," she begged.

"What if I don't want you to go away?" I challenged. "What if I'd rather you stayed, selfish or not? Don't I get any say, if you're trying to make things up to me?"

"That won't help anything, Jake," she whispered softly, her voice like music to me. "It was wrong to stay with you when we wanted such different things"—we both want the same things, Bells, I thought. I just know it better than you do—"It's not going to get better. I'll just keep hurting you. I don't want to hurt you anymore. I hate it." Her voice broke.

I sighed. "Stop. You don't have to say anything else. I understand."

I didn't care that she was trying to say goodbye, I just wished she would get it the hell over with. It was annoying me. Quit playing my emotions like this and just say it already.

I was staring at the ground, but I snapped my head up, getting an idea. It was probably the dumbest idea I've had—or the best. I wasn't sure.

"Well, you're not the only one capable of self-sacrifice," I said, my voice a little bit stronger. "Two can play at that game."

"What?" she asked confusedly.

I smiled slightly. "I've behaved pretty badly myself. I've made this much harder for you than I needed to. I could have given up with good grace in the beginning." Could have, but not wanted to. Damn those beautiful, chocolate brown eyes of hers. "But I hurt you, too." And it killed me inside to see her pain.

"This is my fault," she said. Damn it, Bella! Quit blaming yourself.

"I won't let you claim all the blame here, Bella." No way in hell. Or al the glory either. I know how to redeem myself."

I wasn't sure if I could actually kill myself or not, but I was pretty damn sure I could. I'd been trough way too much, I knew I would have to write a final something for my dad and my sisters, but I didn't really care. Maybe I wouldn't have to. Maybe my pack would just tell him the news for me.

"What are you talking about?" she demanded.

I looked up at the soon quickly, and smiled down at her. "There's a pretty serious fight brewing down there. I don't think it will be that difficult to take myself out of the picture." I knew it wouldn't. All of those crazed bloodsuckers, it'd be easy.

I watched her as my words sank into her. She was quiet for a long moment, piecing it together very slowly. One by one by one.

"Oh, no, Jake!" she said in horror. "No, no no no. No, Jake, no. Please no." I watched her knees quiver.

"What's the difference, Bella?" I asked. "This will only make it more convenient for everyone. You won't even have to move."

I'd never thought that my mind would even possibly think of death as a helpful thing, I didn't think it was even possible. Apparently, that stupid saying is true; never understate the impossible.

"No!" Her voice was suddenly louder. "No, Jacob! I won't let you!"

I snorted quietly. She couldn't stop me. "How will you stop me?" I taunted, smiling.

"Jacob, I'm begging you. Stay with me."

Oh, please. "For fifteen minutes while I miss a good brawl? So that you can run away from me as soon as you think I'm safe again? You've got to be kidding." There's no way she was serious, no way in freaking hell was she serious.

"I won't run away," she said in a rushed voice. "I've changed my mind. We'll work something out, Jacob. There's always a compromise. Don't go!" she insisted.

I knew her better than that. "You're lying."

"I'm not. You know what I terrible liar I am." Damn it, she was right there. But I was right about this. "Look in my eyes. I'll stay if you do."

I tilted my head to the side and tightened my eyes. "And I can be your best man at the wedding?" I seethed the last word.

It took her a couple seconds before she spoke again, and the only thing she said was, "Please."

My head straightened, and I rolled my eyes. "That's what I thought," I mumbled.

"I love you, Bella," I murmured to her.

"I love you, Jacob," she whispered brokenly.

I smiled at her. "I know that better than you do."

I turned to walk away from her, ready to say goodbye to my family, almost exactly like she was ready to say goodbye to Charlie.

"Anything!" she called after me in a strangled voice. "Anything you want, Jacob. Just don't do this!"

I paused and turned slowly.

"I don't really think you mean that," I mumbled.

"Stay," she begged.

I shook my head. "No, I'm going." I paused as I decided…. "But I could leave it to fate."

Her expression was confused. "What do you mean?"

"I don't have to do anything deliberate—I could just do my best for my pack and let what happens happen." I shrugged. "If you could convince me you really did want me to come back—more than you wanted to do the selfless thing."

"How?" she asked.

"You could ask me," I suggested. I hoped she would get it.

"Come back," she whispered.

I shook my head and smiled again. "That's not what I'm talking about," I hinted.

It took her a minute to understand what I wanted. C'mon, Bella, I thought. Just ask me to kiss you. That's not so hard, is it?

"Will you kiss me, Jacob?" she blurted out suddenly.

My eyes widened in surprise that she had actually asked me, but then narrowed suspiciously, unsure if she really meant it. "You're bluffing," I accused.

"Kiss me, Jacob. Kiss me, and then come back," she said.

I hesitated in the shadows, warring with myself, still unsure if she really meant it or not. I look one small step in her direction, and I swung my face over to look at her, nothing but doubt in my eyes. Her expression was clear and calm, nothing there.

I rocked back on my heels, and lurched forward, closing the space between us quickly.

I had to take advantage of this, I knew I had to; this could be my last and only chance to ever kiss Bella again, and I had to make it good. Make it better than the first time we'd kissed.

I was a little angry to discover her resistance. My left hand buried itself in her hair, twisting into a fist, pulling her face closer to mine. My right hand grabbed her shoulder harder than I wanted to, and moved her forward. My hand moved down her silky arm, finding her wrist. I pulled her arm up around my neck, trying to get her to kiss me back.

Once I was positive she wouldn't drop her arm, I let go of her wrist, my hand traveling down her back. I found some bare skin at the small of her back, and I yanked her forward, our bodies closer to each other's now.

I decided to try something else in this kiss. I left her lips and followed along her jawline, and then moved my lips up and down the length of her neck. In all my dreams I'd had with her, I would kiss her neck, and her answering sigh would escape her lips. This wasn't a dream, so it probably wasn't going to happen. My hand let go of hair and reached for her other arm to put it around my neck, just like her first arm.

Now both of my hands were holding her waist tightly, and my lips finally found her ear.

"You can do better than this, Bella," I whispered roughly. "You're overthinking it."

My teeth grazed her earlobe and—somehow, just like in my dreams—she shivered. I felt a little triumphant for a second.

"That's right," I murmured. "For once, just let yourself feel what you feel." Forget the damn vampire, forget everything; let yourself know how you really feel, I added in my head.

She shook her head almost robotically till I brought my left hand back into her hair and stopped her.

"Are you sure you want me to come back?" I asked acidically. "Or do you really want me to die?" I wasn't really sure anymore.

Suddenly, her hands grasped my hair tightly, pulling my face closer to hers. What was going on? Was she actually kissing me back?

I tried to keep my lips away from hers until I was absolutely sure, but it was tricky. I gasped wildly as her hands locked in my hair, and brought my mouth back to hers, my hand going back down to her waist and holding her tightly against me.

I couldn't believe this was actually happening. That her lips were suddenly moving with mine in perfect harmony, that she was so limp all of the sudden, and that I had to hold most of her weight. It didn't matter to me, though. All that mattered was that she really did see and know how much she actually loves me. I knew she did, I always knew. I knew Bella better than anyone else. Better than her own parents sometimes.

I kissed her back a little more roughly than I intended to, but I couldn't help it. I was in too much shock to remind myself to be a little bit gentler with Bella. I could usually remind myself to be gentle, but this was tough.

Her fingers in my hair tightened impossibly, and she pulled me closer. My lips stopped then in shock. Was she still pulling me closer? How? Her mouth kept on kissing me hungrily, like she just wanted more. I felt so triumphant. Part one of my mission was complete; for her to finally see exactly how much she loves me.

She pulled back and looked at me, my eyes were wide, and I didn't know what to say.

"I have to leave," I whispered to her. Her lips were still so close to mine.

Her response surprised me. "No."

I smiled, wanting to stay with her and send her leech off in my place for the fight, but I couldn't do that. Damn. "I won't be long," I promised her. "But one thing first…"

I couldn't help myself, I had to kiss her one last time.

This time, I remembered to tell myself to be gentle. So my hands left her waist and cupped her cheeks as I gently touched my mouth to hers. I made it quick, because I knew the fight was starting soon.

I pulled away and curled my arms around her, hugging her tightly. I whispered in her ear.

"That should have been our first kiss," I said quietly. "Better late than never."

What did you guys think? This was my first time writing anything from Jacob's POV. But, hey, if you guys read my promise in my second author's note (called Update To All My Readers or something lol) I kept my promise. I posted something! WOOHOO! Just so you know, Forever Love (Jacob and Nessie story) will not, I repeat NOT, be posted on here. So sorry :( Thank you for reading this! You guys rock! Feel free to R&R (read and review lol) or to not R&R, whichever haha. Thanks again.