"Even between the closest human beings, there will still be such a distance..."
Mercedes shifted in bed and reached out for her husband of nearly six years now. Sighing softly, she slowly rose up and from underneath the covers and climbed out of the bed.
Making her way to the bathroom where she could now see steam creeping from underneath the door, she opened it and walked inside. "Sam?" She called out. When he didn't answer, she walked further inside to knock on the shower door.
"You called?" He opened the shower door, water dripping from every inch of his body.
"Yes." She answered, looking him in his eyes. "I was just trying to see had you left for work yet is all."
"I'm about to leave in a few. Hand me that towel?"
Mercedes handed him the towel and watched as he simply wrapped it around his still wet-muscular frame before stepping out of the shower. She continued to watch him quietly as he walked over to the sink to grab his toothbrush to brush his teeth.
Standing behind him, she began to take her own clothes off so that she could shower herself and get ready for work as well.
As soon as she was inside of the shower, he pulled the door back. "I'm sure I'll be gone by the time you get out of the shower, so I'll see ya when I get home."
"Okay." She responded softly as he closed the door back. Exhaling, she shook her head before leaning up against the wall of the shower.
Mercedes got out of her car and walked quickly inside of the law firm where she'd been working for over three years now, only stopping at the front desk to sign in. "Good morning to you too, Mrs. Evans!" She heard the receptionist say to her.
"Morning, Ms. Lopez." Mercedes replied dully.
"Uh oh." Ms. Lopez said, standing up from her seat behind the desk. "I'll be back." She motioned to another woman who was sitting behind the desk as well.
"Bad night?" She asked, catching up to Mercedes and walking beside her at a steady pace.
Mercedes didn't answer. Instead, she continued into her office and began placing some of her belongings from her briefcase and onto her desk.
"What did Sam do now?"
"Why do you always assume my mood has anything to do with Sam?" Mercedes sat down at her desk.
"Maybe because ninety-nine point nine percent of the time, it does." She answered. "Is this about you having a baby again?"
"Can we please leave our personal business at home, Ms. Lopez?"
Ms. Lopez shook her head. "You're my friend before anything so, no." She pulled up a seat and sat in front of Mercedes' desk. "Talk to me."
"It's nothing to talk about." Mercedes leaned back in her chair.
"You're a liar and you lie." Ms. Lopez crossed her arms over her chest. "If this about you having a baby, I swear."
"This isn't about having a baby." Mercedes answered. "I mean, part of it is but we're long past that."
"Good." She said, sitting up straight. "I always figured his soldiers weren't marching anyhow."
"Santana!" Mercedes exclaimed, but it was the first time she'd actually smiled since waking up.
"I'm just saying." Santana chuckled. "We both know you guys are no saints when it comes to your sex life so maybe he just can't get you pregnant. Ever thought about that?"
Mercedes humped her shoulders. "I've never thought about it in that light." She said honestly. "Besides we haven't even been trying to get pregnant lately. Hell, we haven't been trying much of anything lately." She moved some items around on her desk.
"What do you mean?"
"It's almost like he doesn't even notice me anymore." Mercedes spoke softly-trying not to let her emotions get the best of her.
"How so?"
"This morning he didn't kiss me before he left for work and just last week, he forgot to call-"
She paused mid-sentence, reaching for her purse to check her phone. "Look," She held the phone out to Santana. "He didn't even call me to let me know if he'd made it to work safely or to see if I'd made it.
"Maybe he's just been busy?"
"He's always busy." Mercedes lowered her head. "He says he's never too busy for me but, honestly...you know what..never mind.
"What! No! I hate when you do that to me!"
"It's nothing, Santana! Honest!"
"You can't just start telling someone something and then stop mid sentence! Tell me what's on your mind!"
There was a small bit of silence between the two before Mercedes spoke again, "I think he's having an affair."
"Sam? Nooo!" Santana responded quickly. "Sam would never cheat on you. I can't even believe you'll think something like that!"
We've been together six years, seven next month."
"That doesn't mean he's having an affair!"
"That doesn't mean he's not either." Mercedes shrunk back in her seat. "I mean, I've thought about it."
"About him having an-" Santana's mouth fell open at the sudden realization of what Mercedes was hinting at. "Noooo."
Mercedes sucked in her lips and nodded her head. "Yep, I've thought about having an affair, sleeping around, having a one night stand."
Santana scooted to the edge of her seat as if wanting more details. "Get out of here!"
"But I love him too much so I know I'll never really go through with it."
Santana was silent for a minute. "Do you think that's why you've been feeling like he's having an affair?"
"Huh?" Mercedes asked.
"You feel guilty for your own thoughts so you want him to mess up so you don't have to feel bad alone." She pointed her finger at Mercedes. "You've been thinking about it so you want him to mess up just so you can have a reason to do the same."
Mercedes gasped, "I'm not even like that. You know me." She responded, now in deep thought. Maybe Nadia was right. Sam no longer touched her like he used to and she was really beginning to feel lonely.
"Or do I know you?" Santana asked. "I've known you for more than four years now and you've never told me about your wanting to sleep around on your husband. Maybe I don't really know you after all." She laughed.
"I hate you." She looked at her phone again. "It's not that big of a deal."
"You've been having thoughts about cheating on your husband and you're saying it's not a big deal. Girl, you need help."
"Oh, hush and get out of my office." Mercedes chuckled even though she was serious.
"Mercedes?"
Mercedes looked up hours later to see her best friend, Darnell Cleveland, standing in the doorway of her office.
"You coming to eat lunch with me and Santana?" He asked, his hands against either side of the doorway.
"Yea." She stood up from her desk to gather her things just as her phone began to ring.
"This is Sam. I'll meet you guys in the lounge." She held her phone up at him who stood waiting for her before taking the call. "Hey."
""Hey," Sam responded through the receiver. "I'm sorry I didn't call to check on you earlier."
"It's okay I know you're busy."
"Never too busy for you."
Usually she would have smiled at this line, but in these days she was becoming more and more convinced that those words had no meaning.
"I know," She answered simply. "What would you like for dinner tonight?"
"That's actually why I called you." He started slowly. "to let you know that I won't make it in time for dinner tonight so you could just put something up for me."
Mercedes shook her head. "You told me you would be off tonight, Sam."
"I know, Babe. I know, but some things came up and the chief needs me to stay a little longer." He sighed heavily and she could honestly hear the resentment in his voice.
She gave a sigh of her own and shook her head again. "Okay."
"Don't' sound that way. I promise to wake you and kiss you and tell you how much I love you when I get there?"
"I wish you would show me how much you love me." Was what she had wanted to say but instead she replied with 'yea' before ending the call, not even caring if he were done talking.
When she made it to the lounge, Darnell and Santana were laughing hysterically and being loud as usual.
"What's up with you?" Darnell asked, noticing her mood.
"Don't act like Santana hasn't already told you." She answered before sitting down at the round table with her two friends.
"I didn't tell him anything!" Santana defended herself on a mouth full of salad.
"She didn't." He said, "Is it bad?"
"It's Sam." Santana said quickly.
"What do you want me to do with him?" Darnell asked, pouring salad dressing on his salad now.
"I don't want you to do anything with my husband, Dee." Mercedes chuckled. "It's nothing serious."
"It is too." Santana interfered again. "She thinks he's having an affair."
"Tana!" Mercedes nearly yelled.
"But that's not even the all of it." Santana ignored her. "She's been thinking about having an affair herself."
"What?" Darnell asked, turning his undivided attention to the young Latina who was dishing out the news.
"Yep, that's the same thing I said when she-"
"Santana, please!" Mercedes said, covering her eyes.
"Okay, okay, I'm done." Santana threw her hands up. "Tell him then."
"Yea, tell me then Mercedes." Darnell reiterated and Mercedes could see that he was pissed from hearing the news.
"It doesn't matter. It's my business and Sam is my husband." Mercedes said strongly. "I hate that I even said anything to Santana. God knows I don't need my business all around this damn firm."
"First of all, I know Sam is your husband but Darnell is your best friend who has known you a lot longer than Sam has." Santana started. "Secondly, when have you ever known for me to tell your business to anyone other than him?" She motioned her head in Darnell's direction.
Mercedes shook her head, refusing to argue with the girl.
"Also, I can't believe you talked to Santana and not me." He added.
"I'm putting in a good word for you and this is how you repay me?" Santana asked, look Darnell up and down.
"What? It's not like I said you're not worthy. I'm just saying, we're best friends." He pointed a figured between he and Mercedes.
"Whatever." Santana said, sitting back in her chair. "Just tell him."
"You already told him." Mercedes said, sipping the drink in front of her.
"I didn't tell him everything."
"There's nothing more to tell." Mercedes said. "Sam isn't paying attention to me anymore, okay."
"Well, maybe you two should sit down and talk about that." Darnell offered.
"Or you could let me give you a make-over?" Santana offered. "I mean, not that you need one or anything but you know, just to spark things up a little. We could buy some new outfits and then-"
"I don't want any make-up piled up on my face. I'll pass."
"It won't be piled up!" Santana exclaimed.
"I don't want it."
"Okay, what about just shopping then?" She offered again.
"Maybe I should just start back working out." Mercedes said softly.
"Not with this again." Darnell chimed in. "You are perfect the way you are."
"You're my best friend, Dee. You're supposed to say things like that."
"No, Dee's right. You are perfect. Hell, I wish I could gain some damn weight." Santana tried to lighten the mood.
Mercedes didn't know if she wanted to be offended or not so she just accepted Santana's words as a compliment. "Thank you?"
"Just being honest. Now about this shopping situation?"
Mercedes felt wonderful. She and Santana had went to a few clothing stores, picking out outfits of Santana's choice and she had to admit that Santana had her looking right.
Now she was on her way home and she couldn't help the excitement that was taking over her. Clay would be late getting in tonight but it would all be worth it in the end.
Not wanting to ruin her hair, she pinned it when she made it inside to take a warm bath then went into the room to put on one of the outfits.
Dressed in black jeggings, black pumps, and a black corset-she went back to the bathroom to fix her hair. Unclipping the pin in her head, she watched as her curls fell past her shoulders before smiling at her own reflection. "I look damn good." She spoke out loud.
Hours passed with her flipping through magazines and her flipping through the channels of their bedroom television before she got up and headed towards the kitchen for a glass of wine.
Pouring herself a glass, she leaned up against the kitchen island as she sipped the drink-looking over at the time on the stove.
2:46 a.m.
She sighed heavily before throwing the half empty glass onto the floor and biting her lip to stop herself from crying.
"This was such a stupid idea," She said to herself but quickly straightened up when she heard the familiar sound of the lock at the front door.
She quickly moved to get paper towels to clean up the mess that she'd made. Rushing over to the spilled liquid, she kneeled down to wash it up from the floor while listening to his approaching footsteps.
"Babe?" He called out and she looked back and up at him.
"Shit!" She cried out, squeezing her now bleeding finger.
Sam rushed over to her, taking her hand into his own.
"What are you doing?" He asked, pulling her up from the floor and walking her over to the sink to wash her cut. "How did this happen?"
"I cut myself." She answered simply.
"Clearly. I meant the glass." He replied.
"Oh, yea." She answered quickly. "I dropped it."
He got clean napkins, wrapping her finger with some of them and taking the others to finish cleaning the mess on the floor.
"Why aren't you asleep?" He asked all of a sudden, looking up at her who was holding the napkin to her finger.
"He hasn't even noticed." She thought to herself. "Uhhh, I was just getting ready for bed." She lied again.
She watched him a little longer as he was still kneeled down on the floor, cleaning the spill before she started off to their room.
"Mercedes?" She heard him call and she stopped in her tracks-looking back at him who was now approaching her again.
"Yes?" She asked and he pulled her to him to kiss her lips.
Her breath caught in her throat as she brought her hands up to his face to kiss him back.
"I told you I would kiss you good night, didn't I?" He smiled down at her.
She smiled softly, "You did."
"Go put a bandage on your finger. I'm gonna finish cleaning this then I'll be up after I finish some paperwork." He said, stepping back from out of her personal space.
"Yea." She answered, her voice hoarse from the tears that she was holding back again.
"Good night."
"Night." She said softly before leaving him in the kitchen.
"So he didn't say anything about the outfit?"
Mercedes sat back in her office chair, looking up at the twenty-eight year old woman whose expression was not one of amusement. "No." She answered. "He just kissed me and said good night."
"Maybe you're right." Santana said softly.
"Here you go trying to make me feel good again." Mercedes said, letting her head fall to the palms of her hands.
"I'm sorry, Mercedes." She said, standing up from her chair to walk around the desk to rub the other girls' back. "I just..I don't know. Want me to call Darnell?"
"No, I'm okay." She answered, lifting her head. "I'll be fine. You should get back to work."
As soon as the day was over and Mercedes was settled in her own home, she called her favorite person in the world other than her now deceased father.
"Ma?" She spoke into the receiver when she heard the click to let her know someone had picked up the other end.
"Yes, Baby?" Her mother answered. "Are you okay?"
"Yes, Ma." Mercedes lied, changing her mind about telling her mother what was on her mind just that quick.
"Let me rephrase that: Is something troubling you?"
Mercedes sighed heavily. She knew there was no way she could lie to her mother. Besides, she could already feel herself growing teary eyed just from hearing her soft spoken voice.
"Ma, I think Sam is having an affair."
Her mother was silent for a moment before she finally spoke up, "and what makes you so sure of this?"
"I'm not sure, Ma. I just…I think he is."
"Now what?" Her mother asked.
"What do you mean, now what?" Mercedes asked out of confusion.
"You think he's having an affair, now what?" She reiterated. "You go searching, you start snooping around-looking for the worst and when you find it..if you find it, you two get a divorce?"
Mercedes couldn't believe how her mother was speaking to her. "I called you for comfort."
"Not to hear the truth, right?" She spoke again. "Mercedes, talk to you husband. If you go looking, you're only going to make things worse. Get some clarity."
"How does one go to their spouse and talk to them about cheating?" She asked rhetorically. 'Sam, where were you last night?' That's ridiculous."
"What's ridiculous is you accusing this man of something that you have no evidence of except, 'I think he is'. You know better than that."
Heyyy! This is a new fic that I'm working on and I hope you all have enjoyed the first chapter of it. Now I'm here to warn you. There will be strong use of language, strong sexual content as well as possible violence and sexual/verbal abuse in the chapters to come so if you can't handle these types of things, this fic may not be for you. If you think you will be able to, please continue to read and leave reviews. This fic will also be made up of non Glee face claims such as Scott Eastwood (Richard "Clay" Gordon), Derek Hough (Micah "Milo" Cooke), Jay Ellis (Darnell "Dee" Cleveland), Phylicia Rashad (Mrs. Mitchelle Jones), Jessica Lucas (Jennifer "Jen" Miller), and many more...Remember, your feedback is what keeps me going and is always welcome. Thank you so much.