know I'm all over the road
I can't help but go
A little bit of left, a little bit of right
It's hard to drive with her hand over here on my knee
When she's all over me, I'm all outta control
All over the road
~"All Over the Road," Performed by Easton Corbin
"How did you manage to convince Gibbs to let us ride back together?" Tim asked as he and Ziva cruised down a back country road. They were headed back to DC with a trunk full of evidence. It was planned that he'd ride back with Tony, but before he realized what was happening, Ziva was in the passenger seat. He valued his limbs, so he didn't put up a fight.
"I talked Tony into letting me go instead. You know how persuasive I can be."
"Yeah. Intimately."
Ziva reached over and trailed a finger down the side of his neck. She felt him shiver at her touch. Tim tightened his grip on the wheel.
"What are you doing?" he asked, staring straight forward at the road.
"You and I have not been alone together for quite some time," she said seductively. "We've got a two-hour drive to Washington…"
She put a hand on his thigh, and he jumped, the car swerving a bit. He regained control and kept driving.
"Do you not want me to touch you?" she asked, a little disappointed.
"Um – well, I – not while I'm driving," Tim stammered out.
"Maybe you should pull over, then."
Oh, did he want to pull over. He wanted it more than anything at that moment.
"Gibbs will kill us if we don't get back to DC on time with the evidence," he said matter-of-factly.
"If you will not pull over, I will have to distract your driving, then," Ziva said.
"Ziva, I—" he was silenced at the touch of her hands. He let the car swerve again, and immediately brought it back to the road.
"Do you not like it?" she asked, pecking his neck with her lips.
"Ziva—please—I'm driving—" he said as the car started swerving all over the road.
"Just concentrate on the road, McGee. I will do the rest."
"I can't—"
"You can, McGee. Look at the road."
Tim was having a hard time keeping the car on his side of the road, with Ziva's hands all over him. He was swerving all over the center line.
"We can't do this now, Ziva… later…"
"Right now, McGee."
"Seriously, Ziva – oh, crap."
"What is it?"
"I'm being pulled over," McGee said as he eased the sedan to the side of the road. The police car pulled up behind him, and the officer practically jumped out of his car. He was rapping on the window as McGee rolled it down.
"License and registration please, sir."
Tim handed them over.
"Do you know why I stopped you, son?"
"I know I was obeying the speed limit," McGee said, trying not to stammer.
"You were all over that yellow line back there. Have you been drinking?"
"Absolutely not, sir," Tim said. He produced his badge from the pocket of his coat. "NCIS. We're transporting evidence back to DC," he explained.
"NCIS huh? Never heard of it."
"It is the Naval Criminal Investigative Service, officer," Ziva offered.
"Could you step out of the car please, sir?"
Tim gulped and complied, getting out of the vehicle. At that moment, Ziva's cell phone rang. It was Gibbs.
"Ziva, how far are you from DC?"
"We got a flat tire. We will be later than planned," she lied.
"Get it fixed as fast as you can."
"We will. McGee is…fixing it as we speak…" Ziva said as she glanced in the rearview mirror. Tim was having a shouting match with the police officer.
"Just call AAA, Ziva. If McGee fixes it, you'll crash before you get to DC."
The officer pushed Tim against the sedan and started to handcuff him.
"I will tell him, Gibbs. See you in DC." Ziva quickly hung up and got out of the car. She walked toward the officer and her comrade.
"Officer, what is going on?" she asked.
"I'm arresting your friend for reckless driving and impersonating a federal officer,"
"Sir, we are federal officers, and if you do not let him go, I will press charges for impeding a federal investigation!" Ziva said angrily. She showed her badge to the officer, and her NCIS ID. "Do you believe me now?"
The officer looked long and hard at the badge and ID. His left hand held Tim against the sedan. Finally, he gave the credentials back to Ziva.
"All right, I believe you. There's still the reckless driving on your part, Agent McGee."
"Can I convince you to give me a ticket instead?" Tim asked.
The officer thought about it. On one hand, he was low on arrests this month. On the other hand, arresting a federal officer would make him the laughing stock of the county. He took the handcuffs off of Tim, and let him stand up.
"You can go. Just stay on your side of the road, will you?"
"Absolutely, thank you!" Tim said, shaking the officer's hand. He rushed to the car and quickly got into the driver's seat. Ziva got in and buckled her seat belt as Tim started the car. He looked at her, disappointed.
"McGee, if we're going to get back to DC in one piece, we will have to be "alone" later."
Tim was sorely disappointed as he pulled away from the curb and headed back toward DC.
THE END