Welcome to my newest fic, "Deck the Strahl: A FFXII Holiday Special. I do not own FFXII or its characters in any shape, form, or fashion. This fic is rate T for cursing. Keep in mind that this is not supposed to be a serious fic, but a humorous little Christmas FFXII story, where people are not meant to be perfectly in character. Also, Life Day is not my concept either. I took it from the 1978 Star Wars Holiday Special, which I encourage you all to look up and watch on Youtube because it is insane. Basically, Life Day is Wookie Christmas, and I kinda thought of Fran and Chewbacca's equal, with Balthier being Han Solo. Please Review.

Deck the Strahl: A FFXII Holiday Special

It was Christmas Eve, and everyone aboard the Strahl was bustling around hanging mistletoe and decorating the tree. Everyone exceptfor Basch that is, who was sulking nearby, maintaining that Christmas was for children and that they had much more important things to be doing to be wasting such time with something so very silly. It had been bad enough that Ashe had dragged him out that morning and forced him to buy Christmas presents for everyone, claiming it would ruin the fun if he didn't participate, and then had forced him to spend the better part of an hour in his room attempting to wrap them. It irritated him to see how childish everyone was acting, he'd even seen Balthier and Ashe, who normally couldn't say two words to each other without fighting, baking sugar cookies together that afternoon, laughing like idiots as they playfully dusted each other with flour. Even Fran, whom had just returned that very afternoon from celebrating Life Day in the Eruyt Village, was humming "Silent Night" as she helped Vaan and Penelo string popcorn for the tree.

The ship smelled amazing since Balthier, who was a surprisingly good cook, had spent the better part of the past two days baking everything from cookies and pies, to ham and Christmas pudding. Basch was quite surprised by the pirate's actions of late, not only had he let Vaan and Penelo hang Christmas lights all over his ship, he insisted on constantly singing some ridiculous song about a snowman that came to life all thanks to, from what Basch could gather, was some type of magic helm given to him by children.

"Stop sulking and help me with the star Basch," Vaan piped gleefully, "I'm not tall enough!"

Basch sighed and picked the boy up so that he could place a badly made star (which was covered in what Basch could only imagine was tin foil) on top of the tree.

"Doesn't it look great!"

"Tell me again the point of having a tree covered shiny crap aboard the ship," he grumbled.

"Now, now Captain," chided Balthier, who had just entered the main room of the Strahl with yet another platter of freshly baked cookies, "Let's have a little Christmas spirit shall we?"

"I just don't get it," he complained.

Balthier sighed, "Alright children gather round'. It looks like someone needs to hear the story of Christmas."

Basch sighed as Balthier sat himself down in a big comfy chair, the others gathered around his feet expectantly as if they were but mere babes.

"Come now Captain," said Balthier as he picked up a large book off the table beside him, "This is for your benefit."

He felt like a complete ass, but he settled down cross legged in the floor beside Ashe and listened.

"A long time ago," began Balthier, "In the little town of Bethlehem, there was a pregnant virgin named Mary…"

"Where's Bethlehem?" asked Vaan as he shoved a candy cane shaped cookie into his mouth.

Balthier shrugged, "Somewhere off the Phon Coast I think."

Vaan nodded. Basch rolled his eyes.

"Anyway," continued the pirate, "Like I was saying there was a pregnant virgin named…"

"How could she be pregnant if she's a virgin?" Basch interrupted.

Balthier sighed, "Because it was a fucking Christmas miracle, now if you all will shut up for a second I'll tell you what happened."

The group fell silent, and after a moment Balthier began again, "Named Mary…and there was a star that told everybody where her kid was going to be born…"

"The star could talk?" asked Penelo cheerfully, "Wow that's amazing!"

"No Goddamnit!" snapped Balthier, "The star couldn't talk people just knew to follow it to find her and her kid."

"Oh."

"So her kid was born, and she named him Kris Kringle and when he grew up he decided that on his birthday he would deliver everybody presents…"

"No, you're telling it wrong Balthier," whined Ashe, "That's not the story I've heard."

"Ashe, please," snapped the pirate, "I know what I'm doing."

"No you don't you're making a mess out of the story!"

"Am not!"

"Are too! The baby's name was Rudolph, not Kris Kringle, and he didn't give presents to people he…um…"

"See your just making shit up now, why do you think they call it Chris-tmas? After Kris Kringle," Balthier argued, crossing his arms as if he'd just proven something.

"You are both wrong," interrupted Fran, "Life Day, which you so wrongly call Christmas, is the day the Viera celebrate the birth of the wood, and remember the gifts it has given us by giving gifts to others."

Balthier rolled his eyes, "Fran spare us the tree hugging shit, Christmas is about remembering those around you and honoring Mr. Kringle's tradition of buying people nice things."

"You all seem pretty worked up about a holiday that you have no idea what it is about," said Basch, smiling slightly.

The others all stared at him blankly for a moment.

"Goddamnit Basch!" snapped Balthier, "All you need to know is that Christmas is about buying people things and eating lots of fattening foods without feeling guilty. Ok? So just get in the fucking spirit already!"

Basch chuckled to himself, "I'll do my best."

Vaan put his arms around Penelo and Ashe, "God bless us! Everyone!"

Basch couldn't help but roll his eyes.

Hope you enjoyed! Please Review! I may add to this, or I may not!