Author's Note: Hi everyone! Long time no see! After being distracted by Real Life and concentrating on my own original story, I have finally returned to fanfic. I do have a new fic soon to be posted, but in the meantime I couldn't resist the urge to dust off my old ones. Not a whole lot has been added, just a bit of polishing, but I hope you enjoy!

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

Murphy's Law

Chapter One

Like everything else that ever, ever went wrong at Café Kichijouji, it was Maki's fault. Well, maybe that wasn't quite fair: Toku really had to take his share of the blame for a lot of things, too. However, this time Tarou felt perfectly justified in pinning the blame wholly and entirely on Maki. And for once, not even Maki himself could whine about it.

The worst thing was, the day had started out so nicely. It was a Saturday, which meant that the Café opened an hour later than usual, which meant that Tarou was able to sleep in. He didn't, of course; instead he rose at his usual time, gave his apartment a brisk scrubbing and then arrived a few minutes early to help the Boss open up shop. (Minagawa was already there, of course but Tarou was in such a good mood after his morning cleaning spree that for once he didn't even bother to get upset over such blatant defiance of space and time.)

Slowly everyone else filtered in, yawning their good mornings, and Maki came in even later than usual, claiming a poor night's sleep. Right in the middle of this very lame excuse he was seized by a sudden fit of sneezing that had Tarou immediately trying to lock him out.

"It's just allergies!" Maki protested hastily. "It's spring, you know? Must be something blooming out there."

That seemed plausible, since nobody could recall ever seeing Maki sick, so Tarou graciously let him off with just one mop-handle-to-the-head and a warning to use a tissue and wash your hands, geez! After that, the morning went along smoothly. The shop was busy but peaceful, full of the usual brunch crowd, and even when Maki began coughing in between his sneezing fits, everyone was too distracted to pay much attention.

Tarou felt no warnings, no premonitions of the coming disaster as the brunch crowd left and the lunch crowd arrived an hour or so later. Jun was waiting on a table full of rather pretty young women while Maki watched moodily from the kitchen, sniffling occasionally.

It was when Jun came back with his orders that everything suddenly started to go horribly wrong. Maki coughed behind his hand, and then he opened his mouth and—it must have been the fever talking, Tarou reflected later—made some half-muttered comment about how unfair it was that girls always seem to fall for that "cute bishounen look."

For an instant, it was as though the scene had frozen. Tarou gaped, stunned by the sheer vastness of Maki's stupidity. The Boss, working the register nearby, paused and visibly braced himself, turning very slowly and reluctantly to look over his shoulder. Tarou caught movement out of the corner of his eye and turned just in time to see Minagawa peering out, straw dolls at the ready and creepy grin in place, from the safety of a cupboard.

It never ceased to amaze Tarou how quiet Jun was, even at his most homicidal. One second he was his usual smiling, good-natured self, and the next second he was raising a two-ton boulder over somebody's head. Today, it was a tray, hurled at Maki's face with enough force to imbed itself a good six inches into the wall. Only Tarou's quick thinking saved the idiot: at the last second he hit the back of Maki's knees hard with his mop handle, sending him sprawling to the floor but with cranium intact.

But of course, that couldn't be the end of it. Of course Toku had to be coming around the corner with a stack full of newly washed dishes just as Maki fell, and of course he had to trip over Maki and send said dishes flying. Between the two of them Tarou and the Boss managed to catch four, which left eight to shatter on the floor.

There was a moment of silence, broken only by Maki's incoherent groaning from where he lay with Toku on top of him. Then the Boss sighed, looking utterly defeated, and stood up. "Tarou," he said wearily, "would you mind cleaning this up for me while I go close shop for a little while?" Without waiting for a reply, he patted Tarou's shoulder and stumbled off.

Tarou echoed the Boss's sigh and got to work, ignoring, for the moment, Maki's moans and Toku's half-wailed "I'm sorry, I'm sorry! Please don't take it out of my pay again!" He noticed sourly that Minagawa had somehow slipped away just in time to avoid being drafted into cleaning duty himself, the sneaky bastard.

Jun simply glanced at the mess, looking like nothing had happened, and commented blandly, "Toku-chan's so clumsy." Then he brought over the broom and dustpan, and Toku finally pulled himself off Maki and came over to pitch in, whimpering pathetically over his doomed paycheck. Tarou ignored both of them and cleaned in silence, because he had always considered it a point of pride not to use profanity.

It was deemed wisest by all to pretend that the whole incident had never happened and just get back to work as quickly as possible. So it was not until they were about to open back up a little while later that Minagawa stuck his head out of the kitchen and alerted them to the fact that Maki was still on the floor, apparently unconscious and running a fever of 103. The Boss froze with his hand on the Open sign, and for a moment Tarou seriously thought that he was going to cry.

Regaining his composure, the Boss simply bowed his head and heaved a deep and heartfelt sigh. "Jun," he said after a moment, "would you and Tokumi please take Maki home?"

Jun graciously agreed, having already either forgotten or forgiven Maki's earlier idiocy, and Toku knew better than to protest. When they'd gone the Boss rubbed his forehead with his fingers. "Allergies," he muttered. He didn't need to elaborate.

Tarou was already feeling germy. "I'll go get the disinfectants," he said, as much to reassure himself as the Boss. "If we clean everything now, we might be able to catch all the germs before they spread."

The Boss merely nodded, head in his hands, while Tarou resignedly went to get the cleaning supplies. He knew, with horrible certainty, that this was only the beginning.

Not for the first time, he really, really wished that he had just left Maki to Jun's mercy.

To be continued…