Title: Facing His Fears
Rating: PG-13
Author: D.D./Dee
Disclaimer: I'm not lucky enough to own them, I only love writing about them.
AN: This is a Future and past fic. The past scene is in italics and is the final scene of Infamous but with my little twist.
Summary: Clark faces some fear with help.
Facing His Fears
March 12th 2014
By the time they had finished work and were ready to head home, night time had fallen and they smiled at one another knowing they had a date to keep. When they left the Daily Planet, they walked down the dark city streets headed towards their favorite café. But about a block away from their coffee shop, Clark faked someone had called for his alter ego, Superman, so he gave her a chaste kiss on the lips, told her to go ahead and then with a burst of speed he flew up into the night sky.
Ten minutes later, he landed in the alley across the road from the café, spun back into his work suit and walked out straightening his tie. He stopped at the curb and stood with his left hand in his pocket, wrapped around a blue velvet box, admiring the woman he loved as she sat with a hot cup of coffee, waiting for him. It reminded him of a time five years ago when he stood frozen with fear in the exact same spot.
March 12th 2009
After knowing what had happened in the previous timeline, Clark had arrived on time at the airport to pick Lois up and for bonus points stood holding an umbrella for her. When they arrived at the Daily Planet they entered the basement falling into their normal banter routine until Lois accidentally brought up about the almost kiss.
Realizing she had made things tense she gave him a choice. "Listen, Clark, we can either talk or just forget about what happened or almost happened."
"We need to talk about it Lois. It's just . . . it's a complicated conversation. Not something that can be solved within seconds, don't you agree?" Clark asked in an unsure tone.
"Yeah," Lois agreed nodding her head. "So I have an idea. I'm going to be at the Coffee Stop Café after work. If you turn up, I know you want to talk. If you don't, I'll get the point and we'll forget it ever happened."
"Ok," Clark hesitantly replied. He then gestured to her suitcases in his hands and said, "I'll go and drop these off at your apartment."
"Thanks," she said appreciatively while tossing him her keys. "So I'll see you at the café . . . or not. It's your choice." She then shrugged her shoulders and announced, "I'm gonna get to work."
Clark stood on the stairs, watching her confidently enter the bullpen returning greetings as their co-workers welcomed her back. A few minutes later he left the Daily Planet and headed to her apartment, smiling happy to have her back home where she belonged, doing what she loved.
Later that night, Clark dressed up neatly and headed to the café as planned. Since he was the first to arrive, he chose a middle table outside by the window and sat down to wait. But the more he looked at the chair across from him practicing what to say, the more he began to panic. He pictured in his mind them sitting and sharing awkward conversation, destroying whatever was between them.
"I can't do this," Clark whispered in a reluctant tone as he stood up and walked away, only to get as far as across the road before stopping and turning around.
That's where he stood, cloaked in the darkness of the night, paralyzed and frozen by something that has controlled him for years . . . fear. Fear of hurting her. Fear of being hurt and a fear of being alone because of his secret. A few minutes later, he watched her arrive and enter the café, only to seconds later walk outside and sit down at the same table he had chosen moments before.
He whispered softly to himself, "I know I'm being a coward but it's for the best, isn't it? This way she won't get hurt by me or my secret. Also things won't get awkward between us."
Then as he saw her look around and smile at the waitress who handed her a hot coffee, he scoffed, who am I kidding? Things are already awkward. She's my work partner and my friend but there's more between Lois and I than just friendship. She knows it and I know it. I mean we almost kissed at the reception and she suggested the coffee date.
His mind then wondered to how stunning she looked as she walked down the stairs towards him in the silk orange dress. To their dance, the touch of her hand on his chest and his hands on her waist, and her warm breath on his lips. God, I wanted to kiss her, I still do and I know she did. But then the moment was broken by Lana's return.
Clark's thoughts then went to what had happened between him and Lana and he shook his head in disgust at his actions. Then he realized Chloe had been right when she said he threw himself into his work at the Planet and as the Red Blue Blur, to hide the pain of loss.
He chuckled to himself remembering, and then Lois was inside my head threatening to kick my ass for brooding. So knowing it was time to move on, I gathered all things that reminded me of my past with Lana, packed them in a box and put them away saying goodbye.
Then as time passed I found my every waking thought to be about Lois. I thought about everything she has done for me and mom. About how closer we have become over the years and about our almost kiss. But most of all I thought about how much I missed her. That's when I realized how deep my feelings for her were, so when I found out she was coming home, I offered to pick her up so we could talk. However I remained silent all the way from the airport because of fear.
Clark took a deep breath and in a determined tone, said, "I'm not going to be afraid anymore. I'm going to go over sit down and work this out because she is special to me . . . more than I even realized."
After many failed attempts to move his feet in her direction, he realized his fear still had control of him. So needing encouragement, Clark pulled his cell phone out of his pocket, keyed in a message and sent it praying for help.
Lois sat outside under the night sky at one of the many steel squared tables, nervously fidgeting with her hands while looking around, waiting for Clark to appear. Her heart raced erratically because she was nervous he would turn up to talk about what almost happened and scared that he wouldn't. So when the waitress arrived and handed her a cup of coffee, she gave a weak appreciative smile, took a gulp of the hot liquid and swallowed not caring that it was burning her throat. Then suddenly her cell phone tone alerted her to a message, so she read it and replied back.
For the next few minutes, text messages were sent back and forth.
Lois, I need you. I need you to save me.
Save you from what?
Save me from my fear.
Fear of what, Clark?
Of US.
When he said "us" Lois understood what he meant, so she quickly sent him another message.
Where are you?
I'm behind you.
Lois nervously bit her bottom lip and then rose up out of her chair, taking deep breaths to calm her heart which sped up after Clark answered "us" in the message. When she turned around she expected to see him standing in front of her, instead she saw him across the road looking directly at her, so she walked away from her table and moved to stand at the curb.
A few seconds later, Lois broke their intense gaze, checked for any oncoming traffic before walking across the road and stepping up on the curb to stand by his side. After standing in silence for a few minutes, Lois placed one hand on his upper arm for comfort and smiled reassuringly when she felt him tense up. Then when he relaxed again, she slowly reached down and entwined their hands together.
Clark looked down at their entwined hands and gulped nervously from the intensity he felt from just a simple touch. Then he looked up into her eyes and whispered, "Thank you."
Lois smiled and replied, "That's what I'm here for."
"One save at a time, right?" Clark smirked.
"Yeah." Lois playfully nudged him in the side and received a soft chuckle in return. "So are you ready to go over to the café to have our talk? Or would you like to stand here a bit longer?"
"I don't know," Clark replied, tensing up at the mention of their much needed talk.
Wanting him to relax again, Lois suggested, "What do you say we just forget about the talk, for now? We'll deal with that some other time. I say we just go over, sit down . . . have a coffee and something to eat and catch up like two friends."
"Friends, that's all?" Clark asked secretly wanting more, yet afraid of what her answer might be.
"Yeah." Lois hated lying to him but she didn't want him to get frightened again.
"Just friends," they sighed in unison, knowing deep down they were more than just friends.
"Lois, I . . ."
"Clark, I'm . . ."
"You first," Clark instructed.
Lois was all prepared to admit her own fear, instead she finished by saying, "I'm really hungry and caffeine deprived, and we're looking like a pair of dorks standing here, especially when there are perfectly good seats across the road. So could we please go over to the cafe?"
Clark looked at her and nodded his head saying, "Yeah, I'm not so afraid anymore. Thank you for coming and saving me." Then he gave her one of his charming and playful smiles and said, "But I still may need some help crossing the road."
Lois looked at him out of the corner of her eye and saw he had a famous Kent grin on his face. So she smirked at him skeptically and said, "Don't you use your charm smile on me, Clark Kent. It won't work."
"I'm not," he argued still grinning at her.
She rolled her eyes at his playful antics and with their hands still tightly entwined, pulled him across the road saying, "Come on Farmboy."
"Excuse me but it's Farmboy plus Reporter," Clark reminded her with a chuckle, then saying to himself, plus hero.
They sat down at the middle table and after giving the waitress their orders, Lois replied, "Actually, it's Farmboy plus Copy Boy."
"How about Farmboy plus Cub Reporter," Clark suggested, with a charming smile.
"Cub Reporter?" Lois asked looking at him with her lip curled and a deep thoughtful expression on her face.
"Well it sure sounds better than Copy Boy," Clark commented.
After the waitress named Leah, delivered their orders, Lois took a slow slip of her coffee and small bite of her chocolate cake and smiled across the table at him saying, "I can live with that."
As the memory of that night faded, Clark smiled widely as he continued to admire his girlfriend, Lois Lane, from across the road. Remembering how the remaining of that night went and how strong their love had grown since then, he removed the small blue velvet box from his pocket, slowly opened it and looked at the ring praying she would say yes. Then he snapped the box shut, placed it back in his pocket, pulled his cell phone out to send Lois a message and then headed across the road.
Lois sat with her hands wrapped around a hot cup of coffee, taking small sips and looking around while she waited for Clark to arrive. She chuckled silently to herself because it reminded her of their first coffee date, the night that was full of changes and revelations for both. Seconds later she was broken out of her thoughts by her phone alerting her to a message.
When Lois picked it up and read out loud, "Look behind you," she bent her head backwards and found herself receiving a passionate upside down kiss. "Mmm, I know those lips," she mumbled into the kiss.
"I should think so," Clark mumbled in response against her lips. After giving her a quick peck, he walked around to the chair beside her, and sat down saying, "Sorry I'm late."
"That's ok, you were off doing your "Super" thing," she whispered, using air quotes. "You've been doing that for years, so I'm used to it."
"My "Super" thing," Clark repeated playfully mocking her.
"Don't mock me, Flyboy," Lois playfully warned, pointing her finger at him.
Clark captured her finger and brought the hand to his lips saying, "Sorry honey, I'll never do it again."
"You better not," she sighed as he placed a soft kiss on her knuckles. "So did the save go alright?"
"Umm . . . actually I wasn't off making a save," he whispered into her hand.
She removed her hand from his grasp and asked softly, "Well if you weren't off making a save, where did you go?"
"I had to see someone about something. Then I stood across the road looking at you, remembering that night five years ago when I stood frozen with fear. And then you saved me and we sat down at this table and spoke about us," Clark explained while staring deep into her hazel eyes with a wide happy grin on his face.
Lois smiled back and corrected him saying, "Actually, when we first sat down, we bickered about whether you were a Copy Boy or Cub Reporter. Then there was awkward silence for five minutes which bugged the hell out of me, so I broke it by talking about what I did in Star City while looking after Jimmy."
Clark nodded his head in agreement adding, "Yeah and I told you about what happened in Metropolis while you were away, which started an argument and you let out all your anger and hurt from what happened at the reception. But once the argument was over, we calmed down and talked about the almost kiss, our feelings and what it meant for us."
"And we didn't stop talking. Not even on the walk back to my apartment," Lois emphasized while leaning towards him.
"Well, we had a lot to talk about," Clark stated.
"That's true, and because we talked and opened up to each other, I think that's how we were able to fall in love so quickly," Lois said closing the distance to kiss him.
Just as their lips touched, they heard someone clear their throat. "Ahem! I'm sorry to interrupt the two lovebirds, but would you like to order now?"
Lois quickly kissed him and then sat back in her seat, looking at the person who had interrupted them. "Hi Leah. We'd like our normal coffee and piece of chocolate cake, please."
Clark smiled mischievously at Lois while asking, "Actually, could you hold off on our orders, Leah? I'd just like to finish our conversation first."
"Sure. No problems." Leah looked at him curiously and saw him grinning like the Cheshire cat, so she understood he was planning something. "Just call me when you're ready." She then walked away, smiling because she had feeling she knew what was going to happen, and couldn't be happier for them.
Lois looked at Clark in disbelief and said, "Hey! We could've eaten cake and talked, you know."
"Yeah, I know, but . . . I'm not really hungry yet," Clark said trying to put the focus back on them.
"Well I am, so I want my cake now," Lois demanded, waving at Leah to get her attention. "I can multi-task by eating and talking at the same time."
"We've talked a lot over the years . . . haven't we?" Clark asked trying to veer the conversation back onto what he had planned. "You've given me advice. We've talked about our problems and love lives with each other."
"Yeah, except most of the times you never listened," Lois teased while continuing to try and get Leah's attention. "Hey Leah! Clark may not want his but I'm ready for my cake."
"I know, and I'm very sorry for that," Clark sincerely said, reaching up and pulling her arm down so he could hold her left hand while he spoke. "But there's one bit of advice that has stuck with me, even after all these years."
"And which advice is that?" Lois inquired interested.
Clark smiled, placed a kiss on her hand and answered, "The advice you gave me on my nineteenth birthday, in the loft. The stuffing dollars into a piggy bank and cracking it open to see I've saved for a Harley, instead of a bike."
Lois stared at him shocked and then rested her forehead on their entwined hands, groaning, "Oh God, I can't believe you still remember that sappy crap."
"I've never forgotten it," Clark sighed seriously, as he placed a soft kiss on the top of her head. "Never will."
Lois lifted her head up and smiled at him, then commented amused, "Ok then, but what has that advice got to do with why you won't let me have my cake?"
Clark chuckled and leaned forward, capturing her lips in a sweet, passionate kiss. Then he slowly pulled away and stood up reaching into his pocket, saying, "Everything Lois, everything, which is what you are to me."
Lois gazed up at him, curious as to why he was standing in front of her, but feeling nervous and excited because she had a feeling she knew exactly what he was about to do. She had been hoping he would've asked her years ago and everyday she gave up hope and just lived for their love and commitment to one another, ring or no ring. But now that he was standing in front of her, reaching into his pocket and looking at her with the twinkle in his eye and charming smile, her heart raced and she was feeling extremely nervous, secretly hoping she could get her answer out clearly.
Clark knew she had figured out what he was doing because he heard her heart speed up and saw her curl her lip out of nervousness, but he was sticking to his plan. So while looking lovingly into her eyes, giving her one of his charming smiles and keeping a hold of her left hand, he slowly kneeled down on one knee and pulled out the blue velvet box.
"Lois. Five years ago in this very spot, we talked about our feelings and professed our love for one another, and we've come here every anniversary to celebrate that." He gulped nervously and continued, "Well tonight, I'd like to make this spot even more special, because honey, I busted open my piggy bank and found my Harley. I found you."
Clark saw a few tears falling down her face and he felt a few fall down his own and he felt everyone's eyes watching them. He then reluctantly let her hand go and opened the box, to reveal a yellow gold ring with a separate blue, red and yellow stone in a row. He removed the ring and placed the box on the table, then picked her left hand back up and held the ring near her finger.
Then lovingly and hopefully he asked, "Lois Joanne Lane, will you be my Harley and ride off into the sunset with me forever?"
With happy tears streaming down her cheeks, Lois glanced back and forth at Clark and the ring, trying to gain control of her emotions. But after a few seconds, she gave up and not wanting to leave Clark hanging anymore, nodded her head up and down continuously and excitedly exclaimed, "Hell Yes! I'll marry you, Clark Kent."
Clark grinned from ear to ear as he slipped the ring on her finger and stood up pulling her into his arms and capturing her lips in a heated kiss. As everyone inside and outside of the café, clapped and called out congratulating them, Lois threw her arms around Clark's neck, he wrapped his arms tighter around her waist and they continued to kiss passionately and smile and laugh giddy with happiness. Several minutes later, the kiss slowed down to small tender pecks until lastly, he brought her left hand to his lips and kissed the ring.
"I love you, Lane," Clark softly and emotionally said.
"I love you, Kent," Lois responded back as she reached up and wiped the tears away. "So is this why you took off before?" She asked, looking at the ring.
They sat back down in their seats their hands on the table, tightly entwined and Clark chuckled, saying, "Yeah, I went to our apartment and literally cracked open my piggy bank. If I had left it in the box, you would've found it and if I had left it at work or the farm, you would've found it, so when I brought it, I took it out of the box and put it in my piggy bank."
Lois burst out laughing and asked, "You didn't trust me. I should be so hurt by that, but I'm not because it's so true."
Clark reached out and wiped away the few tears left over on her cheek with his thumb and grinned saying, "I know . . . that's why I did it." He chuckled, leaned forward and said, "But I do love you."
Lois leaned close, so they were just inches apart and softly said, "You're one crazy Kryptonian, Smallville. But I love you, so I'll take you anyway I can."
"Aww gee thanks," Clark chuckled, pretending to be offended. Then he closed the distance and captured her lips with his in a soft, yet intense kiss.
The kiss was once again interrupted by Leah, who delivered their pieces of cake and cups of coffee and gave them each a hug to congratulate them. Clark then sat back in his seat admiring his fiancée as she showed off her ring to Leah and the other waitresses who had flocked around the table.
He glanced over Lois's shoulder and went back to that night five years ago, where he saw his past self standing underneath that tree, cloaked in the darkness and frozen in fear. He imagined what his life would've been like had he not text Lois and instead walked away that night, but he didn't like what he saw, so he shook himself out of those scary thoughts and turned to focus on what his future would be like with Lois Lane-Kent.
Sometime later, after they finished their cake and coffees, Lois and Clark said their goodnights and headed home to celebrate in private. Telling everyone else would have to wait.
~The End~