A/N: I can no longer keep up my other story because I was accused of plagiarizing, but you know I would never do that... So I'm writing this one! This story has a plot I promise but I'll add in the plot in like the next... ... ... 15 or so chapters.

Disclaimer: I own nothing besides this comfy straightjacket that the nice people at the asylum gave me.

Chapter 1: The insaneomatic

"Breathe in, Breath out..."

Hermione whispered her new mantra aloud. (A/N: I got that from a buddy's away message) She was warming up her brain before school.

"Feel your weight crushing the earth beneath you..."

Hermione shifted her weight around. She has been sitting in her cross-legged position for a very long time and she was starting to get cramps in her side and her left arm.

"See everyday as if it were your last..."

Hermione opened one eye. She started to hear voices outside the common room. This mantra, for some reason, really reminded her of Professor Trelawney, which she found disturbing.

"Let the people around you guide you in your journey through life"

Just then Harry and Ron burst into the common room in their underwear wearing capes and hats made out of old newspapers.

"Give me the polyjuice potion or see the end!" Ron yelled at Harry in a high pitched voice.

"NEVER!" Harry screamed back.

"Polyjuice potion?"

Hermione turned around. Harry was holding a small pink bottle in his hand. Hermione's long-term project for Professor McGonagall.

"Okay then," said "Ron I was going to get an F in McGonagall's class anyways."

"No problem" said Harry

"HARRY NO!" Hermione screamed but she was too late, Harry had already thrown the bottle onto the floor. The bottle was in pieces and the polyjuice potion was all over the floor.

Hermione could not control herself. She got up, walked over to Harry, and kicked him where it hurt. Harry clutched his injury and let out one word.

"Ouch."

Harry fell on the floor. Ron backed away slowly. Hermione cracked her knuckles and sat back down on the floor listening to her mantra.

A/N: Pure loveable crap. Hey, it's hard to write when you're in a straightjacket. Oh well, review and give me random suggestions for the next chapter! ; D