Invisible

With tears in her eyes, 15-year-old Lily Evans stormed out of the house into the December wind. It's not like anyone would even notice her disappearance. Ever since her dad had left four years ago she had been thoroughly ignored by her mother and sister. Her mum thought it was her fault that Jonathan Evans had left and Petunia still despised her for being a witch.

"Why do they have to hate me?" She asked herself in a whisper. "Why don't they even notice me?" She wasn't just talking about her 'family'. But the people at school as well.

"Who are the popular people?" She wondered…counting off names on her fingers. "James, Sirius, Remus…Peter is because of the other three…Elizabeth, Janice, Nini, Dawn and Lolitta." She scoffed at the last name. Lolitta,

'Her parents must have been high or drunk when they named her'. She thought.

"How many words have they spoken to me? I know that Nini and Dawn are in Ravenclaw…but Lolitta, Janice and Elizabeth are my dorm mates. The most the 'popular group' has ever said to me is probably 'Get out of the way.' The rest of the time they don't even notice me…nobody notices me" A tear slid down her face and froze on her cheek. It was cold outside, unusually cold for Christmas Eve.

"That's it." She said loudly. "I'll kill myself. They won't even notice, so it won't make a difference, but how to go about doing it? I could take a bunch of pills. No…they have spells at school that stop you doing that. I know I can't do it here…I have to do it somewhere were I'll be found and at least get buried." She jumped up on the pick-nick table and faced the harshness of the wind.

"I'll slit my wrists and go into the bath tub in the prefects bathroom…perfect solution." She slowly walked down to the deck and opened the door to go inside.

Four days later on the 28th of December, Lily was going to catch the train to Hogwarts. She took the bus from their home to Kings Cross Station because her mother wouldn't have driven her anyways. She struggled slightly with her trunk because it weighed almost twice as much as her slight 100 pounds. None of the people even looked up at her…she was invisible, she'd always been invisible…and she was good at it. Going through the barrier she saw the train was just about to leave. She ran and threw her trunk on, as jumped up after it.

Every compartment was full until she reached the last one. Inside was a boy she recognized as James Potter. She had thought he had stayed at school for the holidays but she was wrong.

"Do you mind if I sit here? I couldn't find any other place with room." She said very quietly. But he must've heard her as he nodded his head even though it was turned to the window. She sat down in a corner and pulled out some parchment and her favorite quill. She began to write her suicide note.

James looked over at Lily, not really noticing it was her that had entered his compartment.

"Who are you?" He asked, pulling her out of her note. She put it in the book she was holding.

"I'm Lily Evans…don't you recognize me?"

"No…should I?"

"It's not like anyone ever does," she whispered bitterly.

"What was that?"

"Oh…nothing…I'm in your year, and not to mention in Gryffindor with you." Her tone was slightly sarcastic, James didn't notice. This girl intrigued him. She was so unconventionally pretty. Not like the anorexic model girls who always hung around him. He kept looking at her eyes, her face, his eyes traveled her whole body and he liked what he saw. Just then Elizabeth, one of his 'groupies' showed up. He noticed that when someone else had come into the room, Lily had seemed to disappear, just blend into the wall. Maybe that's why he hadn't remembered her.

Days later James was whistling his way down the hallways to the prefect bathroom. It was late so he didn't expect anyone to be there. When he opened the door he noticed there was steam on the mirror right across from him.

'Hmm…that's weird' he thought to himself as he walked past the showers, which were all off. When he stepped into the room with the bath his eyes nearly fell out of his head. In the bathtub was Lily Evans. A practically dead Lily Evans at that. He rushed to her side and saw she had slit her wrists. The deep red color of the water was such a contrast to the color of her milky white skin. He was surprised her body was still floating. He jumped in the water, pajamas and all and picked her cold body up, laying her on the white tile, staining it with her crimson blood.

He quickly sealed the wounds with a simple healing charm and searched franticly for a pulse. He was unsuccessful but then, ever so faintly; he felt a slight beating of her heart.

"Thank the fucking lord!!!!!" he picked up her limp body and ran as fast as he could to the hospital wing. The lights were out and he kicked the door with such force it opened. Madame Poppy Pomfry, the student nurse came rushing to the door.

"What do you think you are doing Mr. Potter?!" then she saw the girl in his arms and went white. "P…p…put her on the bed at the end of the wing." James rushed her over to the bed; her skin was the same color as the bed, starch white. Only her hair, the dark red hair, stood out against the snow-white sheets. Her lips were slowly turning blue. James was frenzied.

"Aren't you going to help her? She's going to die because of you, just help her!" he was screaming although he didn't notice. Madame Pomfry went beside the cot and closed the screen, James was stuck waiting.

He waited and waited, until all he wanted was answers. He walked up to the Gryffindor tower and into Lily's room. He saw the empty bed by the door. It was made and there was a note on it. He picked it up and began to read:

To whom ever happens to find this letter:

My name is Lily Evans, but to everyone here, I'm a wall. I've never been noticed, all anyone's ever said to me is "get out of my way" I'm considered a freak amongst people who are like me, who are supposed to understand. If that's not enough I'm shunned by my own family. I feel like Cinderella, once my father left I was stuck with an evil mother and demon sister. I am 15 years old and this is my 6th year at Hogwarts. Nobody even knows who I am. Teachers forget my name, I blend into the stone, and I'm like a walking column. I'm fucking sick of it. I didn't want glory and riches, all I wanted was to belong, for once. But that never happened, so on Christmas Eve I decided my fate. I'm sorry for whoever found me, tell them that please. I'm sure it was rather…messy but I knew I wouldn't have the guts to do much else. I could've gone to the dark side and killed my light self, but I'm too pure at heart. So tell my family that I'm gone, thank Professor Dumbledore for excepting me to the greatest school in the world and please thank James Potter…for only the reason that he noticed me. One day on the train, he noticed me and I felt special for a second. I felt like going back on my plan but I knew that my life wasn't worth it and I knew that someone like James could never love or even like a mudblood like me. So goodbye to everyone, remember me, or atleast try.

Life's not about winning, it's about trying your best but when your best isn't good enough, you might be forced to do something drastic.

Lily Jade Evans

A/N ok this was kinda hard to write…lol but I hope u liked it. I just own the plot and my own thoughts that went into this. The characters are J.K.Rowlings, thx for reading, review plz!