A/N: I posted this on tumblr as 'the twin verse' when I needed a break from working on my big bang. The short verse format was the only thing I could handle on depleted braincells lol. Basically, I just wanted to try writing RPF for once, but I still wasn't ready to write something other than Dean/Cas, so I decided to do a twin!verse. And I tried to keep it PG-13 for as long as possible, but, well, it had to go somewhere! lol ;p
[01]
It isn't until a couple weeks into their Junior year when everything starts to change.
Jensen expects things to be different from the get-go, with him quitting baseball and all, but after he gets the expected amount of flack over the decision, things pretty much go back to feeling the same. He still sees the same faces all the time, he still hates doing homework, his twin still takes every opportunity to annoy him… nothing to get excited about. Which is not what he's been hoping for this year.
But as much as Jensen likes playing baseball with Dean, he just isn't sure if it's his thing anymore. He's been feeling like he might be missing out on something. And he knows that training with the Varsity team will take up a lot of time, so he decides to use that time exploring other options instead. To find that something better. That thing that's just his.
Dean's hurt by it at first. Baseball's always been their thing. As long as Jensen can remember, Dean's always wanted them to be co-captains of the Varsity team come Senior year. So naturally, Dean flips out. As well as their dad. But eventually they try their best to understand Jensen's reasons and be supportive. When it gets down to it, they just want him to be happy.
"Maybe you just need to get laid." Dean crassly jokes afterwards.
"Dude! I'm not you, okay?"
"Don't worry, Jen. With looks like yours, you'll still be able to pull a bucket-load of chicks. Even without the Varsity jacket." Dean leers, "Maybe even some Seniors, huh?" he adds, waggling his eyebrows.
"Yeah, especially after they get a taste of your winning personality and come crying to me." Jensen smirks back.
"Dick."
"Ass."
And that's that. Jensen tells Coach he isn't going to play anymore, he uses one of his electives to sign up for an (as yet, disappointing) Art class, and hopes he finds what he's looking for.
But it isn't until one morning a few weeks into the new year, when the proverbial lightning-bolt strikes.
It's just after Dean's pulled into the High School's parking lot when it happens. When, as they're just getting out of the car, the Collins' twins walk past, and Jensen reels back in surprise.
Jensen hasn't really seen them in a while, but he'd recognise them anywhere. One set of twins in a small school is oddity enough, but two? Not to mention the Collins live right across the street from them.
Misha and Cas moved in when they were all about nine years old. Their mom Eve was a midwife or something that involved delivering babies, so she was always at the hospital, and their dad was long gone, so they used to get left at the Winchester's a lot for babysitting. Mary used to say there was no one better equipped to deal with twins than someone who had a set of her own. At first, anyway.
Jensen remembers Castiel being kind of a nerdy bookworm, but Misha was okay. In a kind of crazy way though, like he'd inherited all the hyperactiveness Castiel hadn't, so he had twice as much as he should have. But Jensen doesn't remember much else besides that, since most of their time was spent trying to keep Dean and Cas from killing each other. Dean just wouldn't leave the kid alone, and he managed to get under Castiel's skin like no one or nothing else Jensen had ever seen.
As soon as they were old enough, Mary and Eve decided the kids were better off (safer) in their own houses, and Mary could keep an eye on the Collins' from across the road. And as they'd grown up, they'd made their own friends, followed their own interests, and rarely saw each other anymore.
So it's a real surprise to see the changes the past Summer has wrought on the twins.
Castiel has his head buried in a book, as usual, and Misha is ranting to him about something or the other as they head towards school, but…
"Woah." Dean breathes. "When did the Collins' get so freakin' hot?"
Jensen doesn't reply, blinking stupidly at the twins as they pass.
Misha looks up at him then, randomly catching his eye, and sends Jensen a little smile that makes something dance in his stomach and flutter all the way up through his chest.
Maybe what he's been looking for hasn't been so far away after all.
[2]
Misha is more than a little surprised to see Jensen sitting at the back of the theater during auditions for the school play. As far as he knows, Jensen has never shown any interest in Drama, and even novice actors are usually pretty intimidated by Shakespeare, so he's more than a little curious as to why his long-time neighbor has decided to show an interest this year.
"Hi." Misha whispers as he slides into the empty seat next to the other boy in the dark of the theater. Jensen straightens up in his seat, clearing his throat quietly.
"Misha, Hi." Jensen replies, glancing at him briefly before turning his eyes back to the stage.
"Are you auditioning?" Misha asks as quietly as possible, trying not to disrupt the audition in progress.
"Um… No…?" Jensen says. Misha frowns.
"So you just get off on watching people recite poorly prepared dramatic monologues while you lurk in the dark." he deadpans.
Jensen barks out a laugh at that, which he immediately has to suppress when someone down the front turns around to shush him.
"Damn you, Collins." Jensen mutters, slouching down in his chair in embarrassment. Misha snickers quietly.
"So why are you here, really?" Misha asks. Jensen shifts in his seat again.
"I'm just… checking things out, I guess. Maybe I can help out backstage or something."
"Really?" Misha blinks, surprised. "But what about baseball?"
"I quit."
Misha balks. That in itself is a revelation, but, "You quit baseball to join the school play?"
Jensen shrugs. "Maybe? Why not?"
"Wow. I just— you've never really shown an interest in this kind of stuff before." Misha says, scrutinizing the boy he thought he knew more closely. Jensen turns to look at him, meeting his gaze head-on.
"Yeah well, maybe I'm still working out what I'm interested in." Jensen replies.
And there's something in Jensen's eyes when he says that, which leaves Misha surprisingly lost for words. For some reason it feels like he's seeing Jensen for the very first time.
[03]
To everyone's amazement - especially Jensen's - he gets cast in the play.
He blames Misha for it. If he hadn't been laughing so hard, Mr. Kripke wouldn't have gotten angry and yelled at everyone in the theater to either "Try out, or get out!" And then Misha wouldn't have practically shoved him onto the stage.
Well, probably wouldn't have. Maybe. Jensen hopes not. But he's beginning to suspect Misha was working up to it anyway. He's starting to think it's exactly the kind of evil thing Misha would've done to him, either way, just for laughs.
And Jensen tried to explain he was only interested in helping out backstage or something, but Mr. Kripke wouldn't hear of it, saying,
"That's for me for decide, young man. Now read."
He felt like he was mumbling through a bowl of water at first. Especially when he was blind to everything but the circle of light around him from the spotlight, the black expanse of the theater in front of him filled with people he knew were there, but couldn't see. Save for the fact that he was clothed in more than just his underwear, it was like some kind of bad dream. And he'd never been great with Shakespeare in class either. But he managed to make sense of some of it, so he thinks maybe he got lucky, and was given something relatively simple to read.
But then Kripke casts him in what is basically the romantic lead.
They're doing Shakespeare's Comedy of Errors, which is about two sets of twins, and the irony of that is not lost on anyone. But while Misha might have been able to convince Castiel to join the play, there's no way Dean would do it, and it takes a good hour before Kripke finally drops the subject.
It's kind of a shame, because Jensen thinks Dean could probably fake his way through anything.
He doesn't know about Cas though.
So in the end he supposes the main reason he gets the role is because he looks a bit like Ty, and that makes him the best candidate to play Ty's twin brother.
Misha tries to convince him his type of role is a lot easier to play than something more comedic, like the role Misha ends up with. Misha's one of the other set of twins - the clownish manservant to Jensen's character, and Jensen enjoys that idea immensely.
But maybe that has more to do with the fact that since most of their scenes on stage are together, they'll have to spend a lot of time rehearsing together.
It's also for that reason, that Kripke gives Misha strict instructions to spend some offstage time helping Jensen get his Shakespeare up to par.
It's going to be one hell of a challenge, but Jensen can't help but look forward to the prospect of spending all that time with Misha.
[04]
Misha blames himself really (or rather, takes credit for it). He didn't want Jensen to have to leave the theater, he was having too good a time making Jensen laugh! So he selfishly 'volunteered' Jensen to audition next in order to prevent him from being kicked out.
The poor guy fumbled terribly through the provided monologue. Shakespeare is like a foreign language to someone who isn't used to it. But the parts Jensen managed to decipher he delivered well enough. All in all, it wasn't the worst they'd seen that day, and the fact Jensen came into it completely unprepared showed he had a lot of potential to work with.
Still, Jensen is completely new to the whole Drama thing, and Shakespeare is a whole other level of theater in itself, so it's not surprising how uncomfortable he seems at rehearsals. Misha does what he can to help Jensen feel welcome though. He's the only one that's ever had anything to do with Jensen outside of the play, after all. But even if he hadn't been, he wouldn't have liked seeing anyone feel isolated. One of the great things about being involved in the play is the sense of camaraderie about it, how everyone has fun even if they aren't on stage.
His brand of encouragement is probably a little unconventional though. He can't help it. As soon as he's around Jensen he starts acting like a total idiot. Anything to get Jensen to laugh.
Jensen has this whole range of laughs, see. There's this small chuckle he makes, mostly in his chest, when he doesn't really quite get what Misha is ranting on about and is just being polite. Or when he's distracted. Or only mildly amused. Then on the opposite end of the scale there's this whole, full-bodied guffaw, when Misha finally hits the mark, and Jensen throws his head back and practically howls with laughter.
Misha loves that laugh.
He starts to hear it more often, as Jensen eventually begins to settle in and starts making friends with the rest of the cast. Him and Jared get along like a house on fire, but then again, everyone gets along with Jared. But Jensen seems to get along with Ty too, which is great, because Ty is sort of a vet in the drama circle, and if you're in with him, then you're in for real. And when Richard and Matt find out Jensen is a bit of a musician, they start talking karaoke, much to everyone's chagrin. But at least Misha knows he doesn't have to worry anymore.
It doesn't stop him from feeling… a twinge of something though, when someone else makes Jensen laugh.
Maybe he's just channelling his role. He and Matt are the set of twins in the play that are meant to get the laughs after all.
Which is maybe why he keeps going back, trying to get that laugh out of Jensen himself.
[05]
One day after rehearsal, Jensen and Misha exit the school theater to find it's pouring rain outside. Misha obviously doesn't have an umbrella, and Jensen feels supremely bad about letting him walk home in the rain, especially when they live right across the road from each other, so he offers Misha a ride home with him and Dean.
"Thanks, but… Cas usually waits for me in the library to walk home with him."
"He can come too." Jensen replies, but even as he says it he feels a twinge of doubt. Misha picks up on it, smiling at him ruefully.
"As much as I appreciate the offer Jen, I'm not sure having our twins together in a confined space like a car is the greatest idea."
And Jensen knows Misha's right, but the way it feels when Misha calls him 'Jen' makes him ignore any instincts of self-preservation he has.
"It's been a long time, Misha. I'm sure our brothers have developed some sense of maturity since we were nine." he insists, though it feels like an outright lie. In Dean's case, anyway.
Misha snorts. "I think you still need some work on your acting, Jen."
Jensen grins, completely ignoring the mockery in the comment. "It'll be fine. Just as long as you guys respect his baby."
"His… baby?" Misha echoes, confused.
"The car. It's the love of his life." Jensen smirks. Misha snorts, grinning.
"Okay then. I could use the entertainment." Misha finally relents.
"I'll send you a message when we're outside the library." Jensen says. Misha nods and they head in separate directions.
Turns out baseball practise got cancelled a little early because of the rain, so by the time Jensen gets to the gym, Dean is already showered and ready to go.
"I hope you don't mind, but I offered the Collins' a ride home?" Jensen says, already flinching from the reaction he's expecting out of Dean.
But to his surprise, Dean just blinks at him for a second, before shrugging his shoulders and saying, "Okay. Let's go."
Jensen's jaw drops a little as he follows his brother to the parking lot. He quickly types out a message to Misha, and by the time they pull up to the library the Collins twins are waiting for them.
"Thanks for the ride, Dean." Misha says as he slides into the backseat after Castiel.
"Yes, thanks." Cas echoes. "Walking home in this weather would have been unpleasant." he adds as he opens up a book and starts to read.
"No problem." Dean replies, flicking a glance in the rearview mirror. Jensen gives Misha a bewildered shrug, still a little stunned by Dean's unusually cooperative behavior.
The first few minutes of the ride are filled with awkward silence, the sound of rain pounding onto the Impala from all sides broken only by the rhythmic flicking of windscreen wipers, neither Jensen or Misha willing to break the tenuous peace inside the car just yet. The sound of Cas turning a page in his book is therefore sharp in the silence.
"What are you reading there, Cas?" Jensen asks, trying to break the ice.
"'Dune'. I've just started reading it and it's very good. Many ideas in Star Wars originated from this book."
"Oh yeah?" Dean says, perking up. "You like Star Wars?" Both Misha and Jensen hold their breaths.
"Who doesn't?" Cas replies, not even looking up from his book. "But I prefer Star Trek."
"Huh. Kirk or Spock?"
"Spock."
"Figures." Dean huffs. Misha and Jensen both cringe.
Cas finally looks up. "Kirk or Picard?" he shoots back, to everyone's surprise.
"Kirk!" Dean exclaims. "Definitely!"
"Figures." Cas says with a little smirk. Dean chuckles. Misha and Jensen share a wide-eyed stare of disbelief.
"I gotta say, Cas, I didn't think you watched tv at all." Dean says.
"Don't be ridiculous. I enjoy television as much as I enjoy reading." Castiel huffs. And if there was ever a moment for things to escalate, it would've been then. But instead Dean nods, considering, and says,
"Okay then, let's do this right, start with the basics - Batman or Superman?" and the debate that ensues carries them the entire way home.
But while the discussion gets heated at several points, they don't actually fight. And no one says anything about it when they all finally get out of the car, but the matching expressions on Jensen and Misha's faces clearly say, "What the hell?"
[06 - flashback]
"Caaas," Dean singsongs as he pops his head over the back of the couch, "Whatcha doin'?"
Castiel huffs a sigh. "Reading, obviously." he replies, not looking up from his book.
"Okay." Dean frowns, before trying again. "Whatcha reading then?"
"Nothing you would be interested in." Cas grumbles.
"Oh yeah? Lemme see!" Dean leans over, grabbing the book out of Castiel's hands.
"Hey!" Castiel protests, jumping off the couch. "Give it back!"
Dean ignores him, flipping through the pages of the book. "This is lame, Cas! There aren't even any pictures in it! You should come read comic-books with me." he declares.
"I don't want to read comic-books with you!" Cas yells.
"Why not?" Dean replies, confused, as if he truly can't understand why anyone wouldn't rather read comic-books.
"Because!" Cas glares, "Because you're loud! And annoying! And you always take up too much space on the bed!"
"What?! You're the one who always sits too close to me!" Dean yells back.
"I do not!" Castiel reddens.
"Do too!"
"Liar!"
"Whatever, bird-brain."
"Don't call me that!"
"Okay, nerd." Dean smirks.
"Shut up! Shut up and give me my book back you… you assbutt!" Cas shouts, shoving Dean so hard he falls flat on his backside.
Dean gapes at Castiel from the floor, stunned and speechless.
"You should show me some respect." Cas huffs, picking up his book and stalking out of the room.
[07 - flashback]
"Hey guys, watcha doin?" Dean asks cautiously as he enters the room, pride (and backside) still stinging from his latest fight with Cas.
"Captain!" Misha jumps up from where he's sitting on the bed, pointing at Dean. "Unknown entity approaching!" he declares with a very serious frown. "Permission to engage, sir?"
"Permission granted." Jensen replies ceremoniously from where he's sitting on top of the bed's headboard, like it's some kind of throne.
Misha immediately drops his pose and grins, jumping off the bed and rushing towards Dean excitedly.
"Dean, we're playing Star Trek! I finally got Jensen to play pretend with me if I let him be Captain! So that means I get to be Spock, but that's okay because Vulcans are way more badass—"
"Hey!" Jensen protests.
"—Do you want to play with us?" Misha rushes on, "We could use a Doctor, or someone at the helm!"
"Uh… okay?" Dean replies, a little overwhelmed by the sudden outburst of energy.
Misha's face lights up with happiness. And then the very next second he's frowning again. "Permission to come aboard, Captain!" he says in that ridiculously deep voice, his posture becoming rigid and looming.
Dean leans away from him, quirking an incredulous eyebrow at his twin.
Jensen just shrugs.
[08]
Castiel is sitting in the library, allowing himself yet another chapter of 'Dune' as a well-deserved homework break, when someone slides noisily into the chair on the other side of his table.
"Hey, Cas."
"Hello, Dean." Castiel sighs. He's so close to the end of the book, he really doesn't want to be interrupted right now. Yet he can't help but be a little surprised to see Dean there as well. "Do you not have baseball practise today?" he frowns in confusion.
"Nah, today's Thursday." Dean replies, "So I thought I'd start my English paper while I'm waiting for Jensen."
"How very diligent of you." Castiel replies, surprised again. Dean huffs a sigh.
"Yeah well, there's a zero-fails policy for all Varsity players, so I can't afford to fail if I want to make Captain next year."
"I see. Being Captain is very important to you." Castiel states, filing away the fact along with all the other new things he's been learning about his long-time neighbour recently.
"Yep. Otherwise I sure as hell wouldn't be here." Dean glares at his surroundings. Castiel stiffens a little at the slight, unintended as it may be. He actually enjoys spending time in the school library. It's quiet, comfortable, and there are books everywhere. He loves the way books smell. And reading is one of his favourite things to do. Dean can't have forgotten that.
"I don't mind it." he huffs.
Dean looks taken aback at his tone. "Yeah, no, sorry Cas, didn't mean to offend." Dean rushes to placate him, and Castiel is yet again, surprised.
"It's alright." he mutters, brushing it off and attempting to read again. He thinks that's the end of it, but after a couple moments' silence, Dean interrupts again.
"Hey, Cas?" Dean says, leaning forward across the table, "You don't mind if I sit here, do you?" he asks quietly. "Maybe some of your smarts will rub off on me or something." he smirks self-deprecatingly. Castiel can't help but huff a laugh at that.
"Whatever works." he relents, smirking in return.
"Awesome." Dean grins, opening up his books. "Just tell me if I'm annoying you okay?"
"Oh, I will." he replies, arching an eyebrow.
But surprisingly again, and a far cry from their childhood, Dean doesn't annoy him at all. Not even when he taps his pencil, or bounces his knee, or even hums under his breath. Castiel just files it away with all the other things he's learning about Dean. Like how Dean's hair has more blonde in it than Jensen's now, since Dean spends more time in the sun. And how his skin is darker, and how he has more freckles on his cheeks… and probably his shoulders too. His arms are probably stronger as well, from training every day, his hands probably more rough and calloused. His lips are a little dry as well. Castiel notices when he sees Dean chewing on them. That's when Dean's thinking hard or really confused. Castiel knows because that's usually when Dean looks up and asks him a question about something he doesn't understand in his reading material. And then Dean is so easily distracted, they often end up talking about things that have nothing to do with the original question at all. And surprisingly, Castiel minds that least of all.
[09]
"O, train me not, sweet mermaid, with thy note,
To drown me in thy sister's flood of tears:
Sing, siren, for myself and I will dote— "
"…for thyself and I will dote." Misha corrects.
"Ugh, this is ridiculous! I'm never going to get this right in time." Jensen groans, collapsing in a nearby chair and massaging his temples.
"You will Jen, don't worry." Misha sits down in the chair next to him. They're in the lobby of the school theater, running through their lines while their twin counterparts Ty and Matt are rehearsing a scene on stage, and they've gone through this monologue so many times Jensen feels like he's losing his mind already.
"Maybe we should take a little break, huh?" Misha suggests, rubbing his back soothingly.
Instantly, Jensen tenses up at the touch. He can't help it. He really likes it when Misha touches him, and that makes him really nervous. He's not sure if he's ready for Misha to find out yet, he just doesn't know how Misha will react. Half the time he thinks Misha might feel something too, that Misha might give him a chance, but the other half of the time he thinks Misha might laugh in his face if he ever found out. And Jensen doesn't know if he can deal with that.
"Come on!" Misha grins, hopping up off his chair. "Do some yoga with me! It'll help you relax." he says, bending forward at the waist until his hands touch the floor.
"Do what now?" Jensen replies, horrified.
"Come on." Misha insists, reaching out to tug on Jensen's leg. "Just try it, trust me!"
The stupefied horror never really leaves Jensen, but he stands up nonetheless, compelled by the feeling of Misha's fingers on his leg. He raises a skeptical eyebrow as he positions himself next to Misha, then he takes a deep breath, and bends forward until his hands reach the ground.
"This position is called the dog." Misha grins at him.
"The what?" Jensen snorts.
"Feel the dog flowing through your body…" Misha says, imitating the trance-like tone of a yoga instructor. Jensen chuckles.
"Ahhh yes, you're really dogging it now…" Misha chants, and Jensen laughs even harder. "Ahhh yes, feel the dog…" Misha keeps it up, "Be the dog…"
And then, just when Jensen's at breaking point, Misha hits him with it, producing a god-awful noise from the depths of his throat.
"Holy fuck!" Jensen falls over onto his ass. "What the hell is that?" he gapes.
Misha stops and grins up at him. "Tibetan throat singing."
Jensen barks out a laugh. And then another. And then he's throwing his head back with a full-bodied guffaw. Misha collapses onto the ground beside him, laughing as well.
"Feel better now?" Misha asks afterwards, when they're both breathless heaps on the floor.
Jensen nods, smiling gratefully.
"Good." Misha replies, huffing an amused sigh. "You think acting's hard? Just wait until you try directing."
[10]
"Love goes toward love, as schoolboys from their books,
But love from love, toward school with heavy looks."
Castiel takes a deep breath before he begins to explain, "Basically Romeo is describing how hard it is for him to leave Juliet. A lover goes toward his beloved with the same excitement that a schoolboy leaves his books. But when he leaves his lover, he feels the same misery as a schoolboy going to school."
"But that's all kind of backwards, isn't it?." Dean frowns.
"Yes, I suppose it is." Castiel nods.
"Well that's confusing as hell!" Dean complains, "Why can't he just straight out say something like 'Leaving you sucks ass'?"
"But Shakespeare is trying to convey more than that. Using this metaphor also brings to mind the idea of youth and the excitement of first love. It creates a tone to the words that can't be captured by saying those things 'straight out'." Castiel explains.
"Metaphors suck." Dean huffs, throwing down his pencil on the table and pinching the bridge of his nose.
"Well, Dean, look at it this way - Most science-fiction relies heavily on metaphor as well. Remember that episode in the original Star Trek series about the aliens that hated each other simply because one was black on the left side and white on the right, and the other was the opposite? White on the left, black on the right?" Castiel asks.
"Yeah, I remember that episode." Dean looks up, intrigued.
"Well, that episode explored all these different ideas about racism, at a time when you couldn't talk about those things 'straight out' on TV. And that was a big deal back then. So the use of metaphor can be… pretty awesome." Castiel shrugs, so obviously trying to communicate on Dean's level. And that's all kinds of awesome.
"Yeah, I guess." Dean grins.
Castiel smiles brightly at that, and Dean feels something like a skip in his chest.
"So it's not always 'How do I love thee? Let me count the ways' and all that romantic crap." Dean relents, picking up his pencil again.
"No, not always." Castiel chuckles a little. "Though that's Browning, not Shakespeare."
"Oh. Well, whatever, you know what I meant."
"Yes, I suppose I did." Castiel replies, before starting to read his book again.
Dean watches him silently for a while, the small smile on his face growing wider with each passing moment, until he finally can't hold his peace anymore.
"Cas, did you just explain Shakespeare with Star Trek?"
Cas raises his eyes for a second and shoots him a small, embarrassed smile, and Dean can't help but think to himself, 'Let me count the ways.'
[11]
"Teach me, dear creature, how to think and speak;
Lay open to my earthy-gross conceit,
Smother'd in errors, feeble, shallow, weak,
The folded meaning of your words' deceit.
Against my soul's pure truth why labour you
To make it wander in an unknown field?
Are you a god? would you create me new?
Transform me then, and to your power I'll yield… Crap."
"Hmm?" Misha blinks, disoriented as Jensen breaks character and drops his eyes to his script.
"Was that right? I still don't know what the hell I'm saying." Jensen frowns at the pages.
"Uh… Yeah, that was great." Misha breathes, trying to recover, "I almost believed you really were in love with me for a second there." he smiles weakly. Jensen's eyes flick back up to meet his briefly before darting back down to his script again in embarrassment.
"Really?" Jensen asks softly, his green eyes slowly lifting again to search Misha's, so honestly interested in his opinion, and so… so close. What the hell?
Misha mouth goes dry all of a sudden, and he finds he has swallow a few times before he can speak again.
"Yeah." he croaks. "Do it like that and Daneel will be falling in love with you for real." he smiles again. Or tries to, anyway.
"Yeah?" Jensen asks again, biting his lip in doubt. Misha finds himself mirroring the gesture, then unconsciously licking his own lip where he's bitten it, soothing the worried flesh.
Jensen's eyes dart down at the movement, his tongue flicking out to mirror Misha in turn, and Misha feels his heart stutter in his chest at that, unable to look away from that trail of pink flesh.
What the hell.
He can't do anything else but nod in reply after that, because holy crap, it may be that he's the one falling for Jensen, for real.
[12]
"Cas!"
"Hello, Dean." Castiel smiles, looking up from his book.
"C'mon Cas, no studying today, I've got something to show you." Dean says excitedly, sliding into the seat beside him and grabbing his arm.
Castiel blinks at Dean a little dumbfoundedly at first, because Dean usually sits across from him instead of next to him, and having Dean so close all of a sudden is a bit overwhelming. And then he's snapped out of his astonished stupor by the feeling of Dean's hand around his arm, tight but warm and completely comfortable with being there.
"…What is it?" Castiel asks breathlessly.
"It's a surprise!" Dean grins, already packing up his books for him. Bewildered, Castiel helps pack the last of his books in his bag before putting it on, and then Dean is grabbing onto the strap, pulling him out of the library.
He follows Dean all the way to the carpark in confused silence, sliding into the frontseat of the Impala when Dean holds the door open for him, and holding his peace as Dean drives with an almost manic grin on his face, to what ends up to be the BigGerson's a couple blocks over. When they get out of the car and head towards the diner, Dean holds the door open for him again, and Castiel really can't help but start to get suspicious. Especially when Dean leads him to a quiet booth in the back. It's all what 'date' behaviour is supposed to be like, and he's surprised by the flutter he feels in his chest at the thought.
"Dean, why are we here?" he finally has to ask.
That almost manic grin returns to Dean's face as he reaches into the pocket of his coat, pulling out some papers and unfolding them before sliding them across the table. Castiel looks down, recognising the English paper Dean had worked so hard on in the library with him, and sees a large "C+" on the top of it.
"Dean!" Castiel gasps, delightfully surprised and proud, "This is…"
"This is cause for celebration!" Dean interrupts. "This is cause for pie!" he grins, "My treat, Cas. I owe you one for helping me out."
Castiel smiles up at him, "That's not necessary Dean, I was glad to help."
"Shut it, Cas. Pie is pie. You will take it where you can get it, and you will like it." Dean orders.
Castiel chuckles and does what he's told. It's not very hard to like free pie, even if they aren't on a date, after all.
"So Cas, I was wondering…" Dean says when he's finished massacring his slice, "Since our brothers are in the play together and all… Maybe we should go watch it together?"
And once again, Castiel is stunned, speechless with surprise.
"I mean, none of my other friends are into Shakespeare, and I don't want to go alone, and I figure this way you can explain things to me if I get lost-"
"Of course, Dean." Castiel replies, cutting into Dean's nervous rambling, "I think it's a great idea to go together." he smiles, pleased.
"…Okay." Dean exhales, ceasing his rambling. "Awesome." he grins.
And Castiel's not sure if it's meant to be a date either, but he thinks he'd like to 'take it where he can get it' anyway.
[13]
It's late. Far too late to be awake. And far too ridiculous to be talking on Skype with someone who lives just across the road. Not that they're really talking about anything at the moment. Jensen is leaning back on the pillows of his bed, singing softly as he absentmindedly strums his guitar, and for once Misha isn't filling the air with his inane chatter, because he's too busy fighting the inexplicable desire to stroke his hand down the side of Jensen's face.
"After the play is over, we should make a music video." he murmurs.
Jensen snorts, not even looking up from his guitar.
"I'm serious." Misha insists. "I've always wanted to try acting for camera."
Jensen barks a laugh, but still doesn't look up.
"Or I'll direct, and we can get some people from the play to be in it. Like Jared!" Misha suggests. He knows Jensen's a bit shy and introverted, so he's not always comfortable in new situations, and Jared's easygoingness would be a great buffer to help him through it.
Jensen finally looks up. "You're serious."
"Deadly." Misha grins.
"Ok then. If we survive the play." Jensen replies wryly. Misha rolls his eyes, having been through this conversation a hundred times over.
"Jen, you're doing really well for someone who's never done any acting before. We'll definitely have it down by the time of the performance. And if we don't, who's really going to notice? We'll just improvise."
"Oh Jesus." Jensen slaps a hand to his face in dismay. "Maybe I should've just taken up a different sport."
Misha frowns. "Then why didn't you?" he asks, genuinely curious. "You seem like one of those natural athlete types, you probably could've done anything when you left baseball."
"Thanks," Jensen shoots him a small smile. "But just because I'm a natural athlete, doesn't mean I want to be an athlete." he shrugs.
"Fair enough." Misha replies. He decides to leave it at that and just be grateful Jensen ended up in the school play. He can't even remember what it was like to not have Jensen be such a big part of his life.
"What about you? Any idea what you want to do someday?" Jensen asks.
"Oh, I don't know." Misha sighs dramatically, "I've always had an interest in Appalachian clogging."
Jensen snorts, "Always gotta be a smartass, don't you?" Misha smiles at that.
"Maybe a paramedic." he replies seriously. "Or something like that. Something like what Mom does."
"See? Was that so hard?" Jensen grins.
"Sorry." Misha grins back. "The quality of my humor really suffers around you. You distract me so much it puts me off my game." he says before he can stop himself.
"I'm distracting?" Jensen echoes in disbelief.
"Well, no…" Misha quickly backpedals, "You're not so much distracting as you are… intimidating?"
"What? Intimidating how?" Jensen replies, alarmed.
"No! It's just— Um…" Fuck.
"…Misha?"
Misha quickly heaves another dramatic sigh, shrugging his shoulder like it's no big deal. "Well, you are ridiculously good-looking, you know. Smart. Talented. I mean you came out of nowhere and beat most of the Seniors for a lead role in the play. And you really care about performing well. It's kind of… admirable." Adorable. Endearing. Amazing. All of the above implied.
"Oh… Um…" Jensen stammers, blushing at the praise. "Thanks, Misha."
Misha sighs, for real this time, as he finally gives in to the desire to stroke Jensen's face, brushing the backs of his fingers down the blush on Jensen's cheek. From the angle of his camera, he's pretty sure Jensen can't what he's doing, so he can get away with it.
"Jen," Misha says softly, all pretense gone. "Are you… interested in anyone right now?"
"Uh…" Jensen blushes even harder, "Maybe?" he replies, glancing furtively at the screen. Misha's stomach flutters at the response, a small smile creeping across his lips.
"Who?" he breathes softly, still stroking the side of Jensen's face on the screen.
"I'm not sure if I should tell you." Jensen mutters, still unable to look at him.
"Why not?" Misha asks quietly. Jensen throws another shy glance at the screen, and Misha knows. "Don't worry, Jen. You can tell me." he urges, his heart in his throat.
"…You?"
Misha smiles softly, his fingers brushing across Jensen's lips, for long moments simply tracing their curves and wanting nothing more than to kiss them. "Can I call you 'baby'?" he whispers, his grin slowly spreading across his face.
Jensen suddenly looks away at some other point in the room. "I have to go." he sighs.
"Oh, okay." Misha frowns, disappointed.
"See you later." Jensen mutters, before abruptly ending their session.
What the hell?
[14]
Jensen is in a bad mood. Dean can tell. It's a twin thing.
Or it could be the way Jensen practically throws his stuff into the Impala after rehearsal, slamming the car door shut behind him.
"Hey!" Dean exclaims, "A little respect for baby please!"
"Ugh, why do you call it that? It's a car, Dean, not an infant." Jensen snaps.
"What's with you?" Dean snipes, taken aback by Jensen's tone. "Got your period again?"
Jensen glares at him for a second, before apparently giving up and sighing in defeat. "Sorry, I'm just a little fed up with this Shakespeare thing." he mutters. "I mean, why does it always have to be 'Thee will I love and with thee lead my life'?!" Jensen complains. "Why can't he just say 'I like you' straight out?"
"It's iambic pentameter. That's how Shakespeare made his noble characters speak. He used prose for the commoners." Dean replies.
Jensen stares at him, wide-eyed. "Who are you and what have you done with my brother?"
Dean squirms a little, trying not to blush. "Cas has been helping me out with my English homework." he admits.
"Huh." Jensen replies thoughtfully. Then he sighs again, deflating completely. "Whatever, I'll just fake it 'til I make it, like Matt says."
"Sounds like a smart guy." Dean nods. "But wait a minute, doesn't Misha usually help you out with this stuff?"
"I don't really want to spend more time with Misha than I have to right now." Jensen mutters.
"What? I thought you guys were BFFs now or something." Dean replies, curious.
"Yeah, so did I." Jensen replies, looking out the window. He goes quiet after that, and Dean drops the subject, knowing when his twin wants to be left alone.
Now's probably not the best time to ask him for advice about Cas either.
[15]
Misha is going to spend his weekend moping. Like he has for the past few weekends. Miserable. And alone.
He still can't work out what went wrong with him and Jensen. Things were going so well, and then Jensen finally confessed to liking him… so how come they aren't together?
They're barely even friends now. Jensen still talks to him at rehearsals, when it's necessary, but they don't even talk outside of the play anymore.
He doesn't know what's worse. That, or the not knowing. And he doesn't want to ask in case it makes things worse than they already are.
Although, he heard a rumor that Jensen was spending a lot of time with Matt now, of all people, and that made the least sense of all. Why would someone tell you they liked you, only to turn around and go off with someone else?
It's beyond confusing. Beyond disappointing.
It hurts.
And it requires copious amounts of television.
Actually, what he really wants to do is go chop down a tree or something, but that would involve going across the road and borrowing tools from the Winchesters. So instead he flicks on the TV, in search of a foreign film or documentary he doesn't really have to pay attention to (moping is priority), but isn't so boring that it makes him want to kill himself.
Maybe he's too miserable to decide, but he still hasn't found anything suitable by the time the doorbell rings.
Heaving the weariest of all sighs, he hauls himself off the couch, and slouches towards the door.
When he sees who standing on the doorstep though, the air whooshes out of him in shock. He stares, completely speechless, as hope rushes through him, overwhelmed with longing.
"Hey… Uh… Is Cas here? We were gonna watch the classic marathon on Syfy."
It's not Jensen. It's Dean.
Misha deflates, crushed by the revelation.
"He's in his room." Misha mutters, letting him in.
"Thanks." Dean replies as he heads towards the stairs. Misha hovers in the doorway, watching him go, then turns to look out across the street at the Winchesters' house, wondering if Jensen is there, maybe watching a marathon of his own. With Matt.
Misha decides to go for a run. He would rather be anywhere but here right now.
[16]
John and Mary go away for the weekend, leaving Jensen and Dean all on their own. In a big, empty house. With nothing else to do…. but throw a party. Of course.
At least, that's how Jared sees it when he finds out. Jensen thinks it has something to do with Jared wanting an excuse to spend time with Genevieve outside of the play, so he takes one for the team and agrees to it.
It's going to be awkward as hell for him though. Things have been pretty rocky between him and Matt lately.
And it's still difficult being around Misha.
Thankfully Misha doesn't commit to coming, according to Jared, saying he had too much homework to catch up on. But seeing as he lived right across the road, maybe he'd drop by if he could.
It's that 'maybe' that gets to Jensen in the end. And on the night of their little get together, he finds himself standing outside the front of his house, staring up at the Collins' place across the road, as the sound of drunken singing warbles from his house.
Eventually Jared comes outside to check on him, snarfing down candy instead of beer like any self-respecting teenager should at an unsupervised house party. But then again, at least it's not a protein bar. Those things affect Jared in a very… smelly way.
"Hey man, you alright?" Jared asks, standing next to Jensen and staring up at the Collins' place with him.
Jensen sighs. "Matt and I had another fight."
"Ah." Jared nods. "So that's why he's singing his heart out on the karaoke right now."
Jensen winces. "Is it really bad?"
"Even Richard is trying to get him to stop. And you know how he's usually all 'Cohen and Speight, no hate' when it comes to karaoke."
Jensen cringes again.
"If you don't mind me asking, what'd you fight about this time?" Jared asks.
"I don't know. I never know." Jensen sighs, exasperated.
"Dude," Jared turns to him, "Matt is a great guy and all. And I guess he's pretty hot. But is it worth it if you're always fighting?"
Jensen doesn't even have it in him to laugh at Jared's attempt to describe Matt. But truth be told, he doesn't think he could add anything different either. Matt is just Matt. He's just… there.
Jensen sighs again. "No man, it's my fault. I've never been in a relationship before, so I don't know what I'm doing. And I guess I'm making him feel…I don't know…"
"Like he's a substitute for Misha?" Jared interjects.
"What? No!" Jensen exclaims.
Jared raises a knowing eyebrow at him.
"No." Jensen says again. But this time his protestation sounds a lot more like he's telling himself than Jared.
"I don't get it man, if it's Misha you want, why are you with Matt?" Jared asks.
"Misha didn't want me." he replies quietly.
"Are you serious?!" Jared exclaims. "Of course Misha wants you. Everyone knows that!"
"…What? Really?" Jensen replies, bewildered. "But I told him I liked him, and he didn't say it back!"
"Oh my god, dude. Of course Misha likes you. I've never seen him try so hard and be so intimidated by someone at the same time. He watches you like a hawk, you know. And he used to find any excuse to touch you. Before Matt anyway." Jared trails off.
"How was I supposed to know all that?" Jensen grits out. "I don't know him like you guys do, I didn't know he was acting different around me!"
But now that Jared's said it, it all seems so clear, and Jensen feels like a total idiot for not seeing it. Misha was telling Jensen how he felt, all along, in his own way. Jensen was just so overwhelmed by his own feelings he couldn't think clearly enough to recognize what was right in front of him.
Jensen looks up at Misha's window again, and smacks his palm against his face in frustration.
"Man, you ended up with the wrong stage twin." Jared laughs.
[17]
Misha finally emerges from his bedroom around midday, resuming his position on the couch to engage in some extreme moping. He'd had to listen to the sounds of Jensen's stupid party all night long. And to add insult to injury, Jensen had stood outside his house for most of the evening, just staring up at his window. Not that Misha was sitting there in the dark, watching or anything. Because that would be pathetic.
But it wasn't like he was going to watch TV downstairs with Cas and Dean either. You could've cut the sexual tension in the room with a knife, it was so bad.
He's going to have to talk to Cas about that sooner or later, it's getting kind of ridiculous. And kind of sickening.
And speak of the devil, that's probably Dean now, banging on their front door.
Misha doesn't even bother getting up, just sinks even further into the couch, and eventually Cas comes out of the kitchen, rumpled and unamused. Cas doesn't look like he slept very well either, and Misha perks up a little at that, wondering if Dean is finally going to suffer his brother's wrath.
But as soon as Cas opens the door, he's being grabbed by the neck, and kissed within an inch of his life.
"Dean…" Castiel gasps afterwards, all breathy and hopeful, and Misha actually facepalms himself.
"Over here, Jensen." he waves, and Jensen's eyes go wide with alarm as he takes a closer look at who he's just kissed.
Castiel's hand flies up to his mouth in horror, and he whirls away, fleeing up the stairs.
"Aw shit, Cas, I'm sorry!" Jensen calls after him. Soon after, Cas' bedroom door slams shut so hard it shakes the whole house.
Misha arches an eyebrow at Jensen from the couch.
"Smooth."
[18]
"So," Misha sighs, standing up off the couch. "You have thing for my brother now?" Misha arches an eyebrow, crossing his arms over his chest.
"No!" Jensen exclaims. "God, Misha, are you serious? I can never tell if you're serious or not." he huffs in exasperation.
"What about Matt?" Misha asks flatly, all humor suddenly gone.
"We broke up." he replies quietly. And Jensen thought that had been hard, but this is already a mess.
Misha is silent for once, completely closed off, and that ends up being more unsettling than anything else Misha has ever done.
Jensen throws up his hands and sighs, defeated. "I thought you were just playing with me this whole time." he admits.
"…What?" Misha frowns, confused.
"When I told you I liked you, and you didn't say it back. I thought… I thought you were just leading me on or something." Jensen sighs again. "But apparently I'm an idiot, for not seeing what everyone else knew." he mutters, looking at his feet.
"Yes, you are." Misha huffs.
Jensen barks a self-deprecating laugh.
"But to be fair, I should've said it back when you did." Misha adds softly, coming closer. "I just thought I was being really obvious about how I felt, so all I was focused on was hearing you say it." Misha adds, reaching up to stroke his cheek.
Jensen finally looks up again. "Dude, I joined the play to be near you." he smiles wryly.
"Oh my god. You hate being in the play, don't you?" Misha groans, pulling his hand away, mortified. Jensen grabs it, holding on.
"No that's not true. I like the whole acting thing. Just not the Shakespeare." he explains, twining their fingers together.
"Oh. Well that's good." Misha replies, his voice carefully controlled, but still a little breathless, and Jensen doesn't know how he missed noticing things like that before.
"Maybe next year we can do something more contemporary." Misha rambles on, "Maybe even a Musical! I'm sure if we talk to Kripke—"
"Misha."
"Yes?"
"Are you ever going to stop talking and let me kiss you?"
And this time, when Misha goes silent, it's in the best way.
[19]
When Jensen gets back home, he looks much happier than he did when he left. Actually he looks much happier than he has in weeks, and Dean's just about to ask where he can get some of whatever his twin is on, but as soon as Jensen sees him, his expression darkens.
"Woah." Dean holds up his hands, "What? I got something on my face or something?" he jokes.
"Dean," Jensen says, all serious-like, and Dean's smirk drops, a sense of dread beginning to creep over him.
"Please don't kill me, okay?" Jensen says, holding out his hands like he's trying to placate a wild animal. "It was an accident, I swear."
"Huh?" Dean huffs, bewildered.
"…I kissed Cas."
"…WHAT?!" Dean explodes.
"I'm sorry! I thought he was Misha! It was an accident, I swear! I'm so sorry!" Jensen rushes to apologize.
Dean is silent through his brother's rambling, trying to breathe through the sudden rush of blood in his ears. He wants to punch something. A wall. His stupid, stupid dick brother's face. Anything. Something. He doesn't know. He just knows he's stupidly, irrationally angry. But,
"Wait a minute. Why are you apologizing to me?"
"I thought…" Jensen frowns at him, confused. "I thought, you and Cas…?"
"What?" Dean scoffs. "No, dude, we're not like that. Cas and me… we're just friends." Dean shrugs it off. No matter how much he wants it to be more, he probably doesn't have a chance in hell. Cas would probably never think of him that way.
"…Huh." Jensen narrows his eyes. "That's not what it seemed like when I kissed him."
"…What?" Dean breathes, "What exactly did it seem like?" he asks, trying to remain nonchalant and failing miserably.
"Well," Jensen smiles, "It seemed like he was pretty happy about it, until he realised it wasn't actually you."
Dean stews over that for a whole ten minutes, before he's storming across the road.
[20]
Castiel is curled up into a pathetic little ball in his bed, hiding under all the heavy layers of his blankets, as if they can shield him away from the rest of the world.
He still can't believe it.
His first kiss.
Stolen!
But oh it had been so good… Until he'd realized it wasn't actually Dean.
Of course it was Jensen, looking for Misha. Of course it had been mistake. Of course Dean didn't want him that way.
Mostly, Castiel feels foolish, for even daring to hope.
And it's this that makes Castiel pull at his own hair in shame, cringing his eyes shut against the embarrassing memory, and covering his ears so he doesn't have to hear his own mortified groans…
And because of that it takes a few seconds to register the banging at his bedroom door.
"Go away!" he yells, hoping whoever it is can hear him through all the many layers of blankets.
"Open up, Cas! It's me!" is the reply, and Castiel flings away the sheets, shooting straight up in bed. "Uh, I mean, it's me – Dean." the familiar voice adds, and Castiel's heart lurches up into his throat. "C'mon Cas, let me in." Dean pleads.
He knows. Jensen told him. Oh God.
Castiel looks around wildly for an escape, but aside from flinging himself out of his bedroom window, there's none. He does seriously consider it for a second though. Dean is the last person he wants to face right now.
"I'm not leaving until you let me in." Dean threatens through the door. Then after a long moment he adds, "Please, Cas." a little more desperately.
Castiel heaves a resigned sigh, dragging himself out of his safe nest of blankets. He knows how stubborn Dean is, so he knows he'll find himself starved for food and peeing in jars before Dean even considers leaving. And while Castiel's stubborn enough to go that far as well, he also knows he's going to have to deal with Dean sooner or later anyway.
He would've preferred it to be later… but he doesn't have any jars.
"What do you want Dean?" is what he begins to ask when he finally unlocks the door. But he doesn't even get the chance, because Dean is instantly reaching out for his face, pulling him close and stealing the words— the very breath from his throat, with a fierce kiss.
"Dean." Castiel gasps when he is finally allowed to breathe again, amazed, but without doubt this time.
"Your first kiss shouldn't have been a mistake, Cas." Dean murmurs, pressing their foreheads together, "It should've been special." he whispers, "It should've been me."
"I wanted it to be you." Castiel whispers back.
"I know that now." Dean pulls back, frustrated. "God I wanted to be your first, so bad. I want to be all your firsts." he huffs angrily, fingers gripping Castiel's arms.
"Dean," Castiel pulls him close again, murmuring soothingly into his ear, "I still have many firsts left to share with you."
When Dean pulls back to look at him then, he's grinning from ear to ear, "You're right Cas. Let's start now."
[21]
Misha burrows further into the couch, turning the volume on the television up from annoyingly loud to obnoxiously loud. It manages to drown out the totally gross sounds of Cas making out with Dean in the front hall, but unfortunately they still don't come up for air. But then again, they didn't take the hint twenty minutes ago when he first turned the volume up either.
Misha's starting to worry that his normally reserved twin has developed some kind of weird exhibitionist kink or something. You'd think Dean was going off to war instead of back across the road, the way they're going at it.
It was kind of sweet when they'd first gotten together, and Misha was happy for his twin, so he'd left Cas alone. But now it's just grating.
"I'll call you when I get home." he hears Dean murmur during an unfortunate silence between ads, and that's it. The grace period is over.
"Hey Dean, why did the chicken cross the road?" he snipes in their direction.
"Screw you, Misha!" Dean replies, before finally, finally leaving.
"Did he use protection at least?" Misha snarks as Cas shuts the door. He's expecting his brother will yell at him, some red-faced sputtering and stammering, or at least a little embarrassed outrage…
He doesn't expect the blissed out sigh as Cas leans back against the door, or the dreamy look on his face as he replies, "Yes."
Misha gapes.
[22]
Dean doesn't know it, but he's about to slice off his finger. He also doesn't know that Misha's about to get all up in his face with the protective brother routine because quite frankly, Dean's too busy daydreaming about Misha's brother to notice. But when his electric saw abruptly comes to a stop in Shop class that afternoon, he suddenly becomes aware of both aforementioned things.
"I swear to God, Dean, if you break his heart I'll-"
"You'll what? Break my face?" Dean smirks, beating him to the punch. Misha looks so much like Cas, squinting at him in anger like that, it's hard for Dean to take him seriously. "Pretty unoriginal for you Misha."
"Actually I was thinking more along the lines of using that saw to chop off more than just your finger." Misha replies, and Dean can't help but balk a little at that idea.
"Look," he sighs, "Not for nothin' Misha, I mean I know we aren't kids anymore, but I'm pretty sure Cas could still beat the ever loving crap out of me himself if he wanted to."
"Fair point." Misha concedes.
"Besides," Dean narrows his eyes threateningly, "If we were gonna do the protective brother thing, I shoulda kicked your ass weeks ago."
"Also a fair point." Misha deflates, backing away.
"Glad we got that sorted then." Dean grins, turning his saw on again.
He tries to concentrate more on what he's doing after that, but he can't help that the thought of Cas being perfectly capable of knocking him on his ass turns him on, just a little.
[23]
"Dude, Misha, your brother Cas is seriously hot." Richard declares one day during rehearsal, plopping down on the seat next to him. Misha rolls his eyes.
"Richard, you do realise he looks exactly like me, right?" he says, arching an eyebrow.
"Pshaw." Richard scoffs. "Totally different. I mean, he's so sweet. Everytime I see him I just want to tie him up and eat him." he leers.
Misha shudders, reflexively inching as far away from his insane friend as possible.
"Think you could put in a good word for me?" Richard waggles his eyebrows
"He's taken." Misha replies with no small measure of relief.
"What?" Richard's eyes go almost comically wide with disbelief and despair, a reaction which Misha enjoys in no small measure either.
"Yep." he smirks, "Very seriously taken."
"By who?!" Richard sputters, "It's Sebastian isn't it. You should know better than to expose all that innocent sweetness to a salacious lech like Sebastian!"
("Hey!" Sebastian protests from the other side of the theater.)
"Oooh big words Richard." Misha mocks him, "Been studying for the SATs?"
"C'mon, Misha, you gotta give me something!" Richard begs, just as Misha spies Jensen coming back from the bathroom. Jensen may have given up baseball to join the play, but he's still just as big as Dean. And Richard is smaller than Cas, even. Misha has no doubt Dean could beat Richard to a bloody pulp, given the right incentive.
"Just leave it alone Richard, for your own good. Trust me."
[24]
"So Dean," Jensen grins, popping his head in the door of his brother's bedroom barely two minutes after Dean gets home. It's not like he was just waiting for Dean or anything. Because that would make him sadistic, or slightly evil, even. And that would mean Misha has been a very bad influence on him.
Dean's lying on his bed, staring up at the ceiling with a dopey smile on his face that Jensen knows has something to do with Cas. Jensen grins. He can't wait to see Dean's reaction to this.
"I just heard from Misha that one of his friends wants to, and I quote, 'tie Cas up and eat him.'" he smirks.
"What?!" Dean shoots up in his bed. "Who?!" he snarls.
"He wouldn't say." Jensen shrugs. "I'm not even supposed to be telling you this much."
"I bet it's that Sebastian lech." Dean narrows his eyes.
(Somewhere across town, Sebastian suddenly sneezes.)
"Oh fuck." Dean pales suddenly, his eyes widening in horror. "Do you think Cas would want that? Someone like Sebastian or one of Misha's other theater buddies? I mean, they're all really smart, aren't they? And witty? And—"
And it's almost funny for a second, until Jensen realizes his twin is actually, genuinely, freaking the fuck out.
"Dean!" Jensen cuts off his twin's panicked rambling, grabbing him by the shoulders and giving him a shake. "Dean, Cas isn't going to just up and leave you, anytime soon. If ever. He's totally in love with you."
"Holy shit, he totally is, right?" Dean whispers, looking even more panicked than before. "Jesus Jen, the things he lets me do to him… Who knew nerds could be so hot?" Dean huffs an amazed sound, even as Jensen cringes at the unwanted information.
Dean doesn't notice, rambling on, "It's like he never learned to be self-conscious about himself, so he isn't. And he loves it because it's me. And it's fucking terrifying because I think I –" Dean trails off, his panic reaching a fevered-pitch, and Jensen knows what he's going to say even before he finishes;
"I think I'm in love with him too."
[25]
Castiel is sitting in his usual spot under a tree outside the cafeteria, slowly eating his lunch and trying to read a book, but quite frankly, he's too distracted with daydreaming about Dean to get through a single sentence. Unfortunately, that also means he's too distracted to notice the annoying interruption that's about to sit down next to him.
"Hey, Cas! Remember me?" said interruption leers as he plops himself down, leaning so close, their legs press up against each other.
Castiel frowns, trying to lean away. "You're a friend of Misha's?"
Mr. Interruption beams, "That's right! I'm Richard."
Knowing his name doesn't make him any less annoying though, and Castiel's frown deepens. "Was there something you wanted?"
"Well…" Richard sing-songs, "Misha told me you're taken, but I don't see anyone here with you, so I was just wondering if you wanted some company?"
Castiel is about to spit out a very definite "I don't," but before he can even open his mouth, Dean plops down on his other side, easily draping an arm around his shoulder and pressing a kiss into his neck.
Castiel can't help the shiver that runs through him at that, but when he realises what Dean's just done he finds himself with a stupidly happy smile on his face. It's the most affectionate Dean's ever been with him in public. The most affectionate Dean's ever been with anyone in public. Over his entire history of serial one-night stands and womanizing ways.
Granted, it all happens so quick you'd miss it if you blinked, but no one in the cafeteria has blinked an eye since Dean slammed out the door and sat himself down. He's just sent a very clear message to anyone and everyone who's watching.
"Hey Cas," Dean grins innocently as Richard gapes at them. "Is there a problem here?" he asks, his grin taking a hard edge as he looks pointedly in Richard's direction.
"Nope, no problem." Richard recovers hastily, "I'm just gonna go over there now." he mumbles, fleeing the scene.
"Seeya later, Dick." Dean smirks.
[26]
Quite frankly, Jensen's a little intimidated by how fast Dean and Cas are moving in their relationship. More than a little intimidated actually. Downright scared, to be exact. Because he gets it.
As if he wasn't already spending enough time with Misha, now they look for every single chance they can get. They disappear during lunch, skip study hall, stay after rehearsals when everyone has left - hell even during rehearsal if they're sneaky enough - Misha shows him dark, secret corners of the theater he never knew existed, and touches him in ways he never knew he wanted, but can barely live without now.
He doesn't know how he thought he could ever settle for Matt. How he ever could've fooled himself into believing what he felt for Matt was something real. But maybe that was because he didn't know he could feel like this.
Misha makes him react and crave and need in ways he never knew he could. And while he was a little shy about it at first, now he finds he can barely hold back anymore, throwing himself at Misha unashamedly and… whole-heartedly.
It's Dean's little freakout over Cas that sticks with him, making him ponder all the breath-stealing things Misha does to him, all the things he lets Misha do to him, all the things he wants Misha to do to him, and what that all means exactly. Until finally, one afternoon after rehearsals, when they're folded up in the velvet-heavy curtains of the stage, hidden from the rest of the world and rutting up against each other with their flies open and Misha's mouth doing wondrous things to his nipple, Jensen suddenly blurts, "I think I love you."
And then Misha makes him come so hard he forgets to be disappointed Misha doesn't say it back.
[27]
"I think I love you too."
That's all he had to say.
And it's kind of a big deal that he didn't. He knows that. Hell, he lost Jensen once because he failed to do the simple thing of telling Jensen he liked him back.
He was just caught off guard, is all. He wasn't trying to pull a confession out of Jensen this time, so he was unprepared. Jensen just told him how he felt freely, of his own volition, right out of the blue. Well, in the midst of some serious throes of passion, but still.
No. The truth is, Misha's not even sure if he's capable of saying something honestly straight-faced. When it gets down to it, he always manages to avoid any serious situations with humor. Like he did the first time he got Jensen to admit his feelings. And that turned out wonderfully.
Well, eventually it did, anyway.
Okay, so this time Misha realises he needs to do something here. Something decidedly declarative. Maybe something that will set the mood so perfectly, he can't help but confess his undying devotion.
He takes Jensen on a date. An honest-to-goodness dinner and a movie, date. It's not an overly creative solution, but it's a definite change from all the sneaking around, finding secluded places around school to make out. And he knows Jensen is kind of traditional at heart, so he'll appreciate the gesture.
He even shows up at Jensen's house with flowers. Well, two comically large plastic sunflowers, in a ridiculously large gift box, but they're still flowers. And Jensen's reaction when he opens the box is completely worth it, stunned and laughing so hard he almost cries. God, Misha loves that laugh.
It's a perfect evening. Right up to the point they're in his bed, slowly peeling off each other's clothes and their own respective watches and accessories, and Misha makes a passing comment about Jensen's ring. He's tried doing some work with silver and jewellery in Shop class and he can't help but admire the detail on it.
"You can have it, if you want." Jensen tells him.
"Really? But it's so beautiful, I can't." Misha protests.
"It's yours." Jensen breathes, sliding it on his finger.
And if there was ever a moment for a love confession, it should've been then. Jensen's just given him his ring for crying out loud.
So of course, what he says is, "Wow. I bet this ring is going to feel great when I jack off."
And Jensen, beautiful soul that he is, just smiles and replies, "Then I hope it reminds you of me when you do."
It's then that it hits him, that what he feels for Jensen goes way beyond a cheesy dinner and movie date. And while once upon a time it was a huge deal just to get Jensen to admit he had a crush, what Misha feels for him now is so much more than that.
And he doesn't 'think' it. He knows.
[28]
Jensen doesn't need Misha to say it. He knows Misha now. So he knows not to pay attention to anything that comes out of Misha's mouth. Nothing Misha says is serious, so the words themselves don't matter.
It's Misha's actions that tell him everything he needs to know. Misha is always there for him - even though he comes across as a careless scatterbrain - always on time for rehearsals, or any of their other secret rendezvous. And he's always completely present and focused, even though he seems like he's all over the place and easily distracted – he doesn't miss a thing.
That kind of attentiveness and care overwhelms him sometimes. And it's probably what led to his unbidden declaration of love to begin with.
That, and Misha's amazing tongue.
Yeah, Jensen doesn't need Misha to tell him anything at all. Not if it means Misha has to stop doing all those other wonderful things with his mouth to say it.
That's his first thought when they're making out on Misha's bed one afternoon, and he suddenly realizes Misha's mouth is no longer on his skin, but forming words instead.
"I made something for you in Shop." Misha is saying, and Jensen pouts even more when he realizes that not only has Misha stopped kissing him, but he's stopped for a friggin' birdhouse or something.
But then he sees what Misha's pulled out of his pocket, and all he can do is blink, dumbfounded, as Misha takes his hand, and slides it on.
"Oh good, it fits." Misha breathes a sigh of relief. "Dean helped me with the sizing, but I still wasn't sure." he smiles.
"What is this?" Jensen finally breathes, staring at the simple band of silver around his finger.
"That's so you know… how I feel about you, too." Misha murmurs.
A small sound of surprise escapes Jensen's throat then, at the meaning of the gesture, the honesty in Misha's words, and sincerity in his eyes.
Another blink though, and it's gone.
"And now you'll think of me when you jack off as well."
[29]
If anyone told Jensen at the beginning of the year that when he gave up baseball to try new things, he would end up joining the school play just to be closer to the boy who lives across the road… he would've told them they were crazy.
But that's exactly what happened. Plus a whole lot of crazy on top of that.
When he finally loses his virginity to said boy across the road, it goes a lot like his first time performing on stage. He's nervous as hell at first, so there are a few awkward hitches here and there. But he puts his trust in Misha, so eventually they find their rhythm. And by the end of it Jensen's pretty sure it's something he wants to do for the rest of his life.
He's found what he was looking for.
[30 - flashforward]
Sometime in the not so distant future…
"Dean."
"Hmm?"
"You're hogging all the sheets again."
"Well how else am I supposed to make sure you stay close to me, Cas?"
"…As if I'd want to be anywhere else. Assbutt."
Meanwhile, under the sheets, in a bedroom not so far away…
"Permission to come aboard, sir?"
"Permission granted."
~ fin
A/N: Sorry guys, there's still a bunch of Slam Dunk updates to come, but my Dean/Cas big bang will be out in October :)