[A/N] This is more of a fun side project for me, in case I get bored with my current stories (which I do a lot) Mainly just for laughs, rated T for swearing. Don't expect fast updates.

'NO WAY IN HELL. In fact, there isn't even a way in heaven that I'm ever going to agree to this.'

'Max,' Jeb tried his sweet tone to try and coax me into at least considering the idea, but I could hear the underlining exasperation barely masked by his words.

'Don't you Max me, Jeb. I am the flock leader and I make the decisions here. We are not going to school, and that is final.'

Jeb's shoulders sagged in exhaustion. 'You haven't even considered-'

'I am not considering-'

'-the rest of the flock's opinion on this.' Jeb finished, wearily slumping on the new couch. In our new house.

See, the flock and I decided that going public for the CSM and doing air shows or speeches just gotten way too risky as of late. Eraser attacks became annoyingly common, even with the 'beefed up' security, and after some close calls and a few flock meetings, we moved to a new house in a small town in Paradise (the irony), Ohio, to lay low.

As for our current argument, Jeb the brilliant dad came up with this amazingly retarded idea to go to school. I mean seriously, after working so many years for huge companies like Itex and the CSM as the head honcho, you'd think he'd have enough smarts to know that this was a terrible idea. School definitely not the way to lay low. At all. It won't be more than a week till our cover is blown and we have to move. Again.

I crossed my arms and looked towards the rest of the people in the room, specifically my flock, and dared them to challenge me. They should all know one thing about Maximum Ride, is that I have a godly stubbornness. Sure, it has helped me through experiments and surgeries and getting through hordes of genetically mutated bad guys, but just messes up social situations. Like these.

Nudge shifted uneasily and stepped forward. I groaned inwardly, knowing she was going to try to persuade me to going. I braced myself for a whole lot of talking and possibly Bambi eyes.

'Y'know Max, maybe school isn't such a bad idea. I mean, we can learn to fit in better and be around other normal kids instead of being really withdrawn neighbours that don't ever show their faces, and it's just so boring at home with just the television and each other, not that I don't like your company but-'

'Nudge SHUT UP!' Iggy yelled. 'You're going to make me both blind and deaf,' he grumbled.

'Look, Max. Would you rather stay here and listen to Nudge's unending blabber-'

Nudge shot him a death glare that was wasted on Iggy.

'-and burst your eardrums, or go to a harmless school?'

'It's tempting, but I'd pick Nudge.' I replied, still not relenting.

'OK, WHOEVER WANTS TO GO TO SCHOOL SAY AYE!' screamed Nudge, impatient. We all glared at her, but she ignored us.

'Aye!' (Nudge)

'Aye!' (Angle)

'BURP! That's Ignese for aye!' (You can probably guess where that came from)

'Aye! Nice one Ig!' (Gazzy)

'Aye!'

I raised my eyebrow.

'Total, you can't even go to school. You a freaking dog with wings.'

'Excuse me, I prefer Canine American,' he grumbled. 'And I can go to school!'

'Yeah, in Doggyland.' I retorted. I was annoyed at how many wanted to go to school. They should've known better by now. I was slightly grateful to Fang, who hadn't piped up yet, half because he was Fang, and because he was still backing me up.

'OK, NOW WHOEVER DOSEN'T WANNA GO TO SCHOOL, SAY I SUCK!' Nudge yelled again. I glared at her. How could anyone scream that loudly in the evening?

'I do not wanna go to school,' I stated.

'I'm with Max,' said Fang smoothly.

'And since I'm the leader, my vote counts 5 times!' I yelled.

'Does not!'

'Does to!'

As me and Nudge engaged in a screaming match, Jeb stepped up again.

'Max! This isn't for you to choose.'

'Oh yeah?' I growled with a tone so cold it would make lesser men flinch. But Jeb was probably already used to it.

'I've already enrolled you. All of you.'

The silence that ensued could be cut with a knife. I was the first to react.

'YOU WHAT!?'

I was about to tackle Jeb with the imaginary knife used to cut the silence when Fang leapt up to restrain me.

'Max.' He grabbed my shoulder and spun me around so I was facing him. Then he leaned forward so I could practically feel his breath on my face. I stared at him, still not willing to go along with the idea.

'Look, we'll just try it out for a couple of weeks okay? I'm sure nothing would go wrong. We can always move again.'

'Nothing will go wrong?' I snorted.

'Since when did that ever happen in my life?'

Fang sighed, his breath tickling my face.

'I'll make sure nothing goes wrong, okay? Trust me.'

I finally relented. 'Fine. Shove off, your breath stinks.' I added the last sentence to show that I was still not entirely convinced that this'll work out. Fang moved away from me, returning to his position in the corner.

'Aaaaaaand Fang's charm works again!' Iggy drawled, slapping Fang on the back. I dared him to go on with a glare, but the blind boy didn't seem to get the message.

'Dude, you have to tell me your secret. Is it your deep, bottomless eyes? Is it your sexy body? Oh, I know1 It must be your sultry voi-'

I tackled the bird kid, slamming him down on the floor and intent on beating the crap out of him. Raising my fist, I threw it into his stomach. Man, that dude has really hard abs. But I wasn't gonna relent.

'YOU'

SMASH

'DID'

SMASH

'NOT'

SMASH

'JUST SAY THAT.'

DOUBLE WHAMMY

K.O.

Max: 1

Asshole of a bird kid: 0

Fang once again pulled me from completely murdering Iggy's ass, and I humphed in victory. By this time, Jeb was ready to snap.

'Alright, all of you, to bed now. School starts tomorrow at 6.'

I stormed to my room, leaving a half dead bird kid and a stunned flock behind.