AN: Bored again. This idea wanted to be let out.
I wanted to call it Prank War, but that was already taken. So I came up with a title so stupid that nobody would ever think to have it.
I don't own RWBY.
Color Me Pranked
Chapter 1
It was a dreary Monday morning at Beacon Academy. A heavy rainfall was soaking the ground and dark storm clouds were blocking out the sweet warmth of the sun. It was weather that spoke of ill omens and foreshadowed dark times on the horizon. And on no better day than today.
The ill omens didn't stop at the lousy weather, or that it was Monday, the most baneful day of them all.
No, there were quite a few.
The previous night, loud bangs, whirring noises, and a vaguely familiar crackling were echoing throughout the campus. Students awoke in the middle of the night in a cold sweat, double checking their rooms for any signs of sabotage before attempting to return to their restless slumbers. The coffee machine in the teacher's lounge broke down for the first time in ten years.
Most ill omens indeed.
But the omens culminated when, at the start of the day, a student was suspended by their underwear atop the Beacon Statue—the one in the courtyard depicting a Huntsman and Huntress standing over a snarling Beowolf. The underwear was impaled on the statue's Huntsman's sword, and the student, while physically unharmed, was emotionally scarred when the students emerged onto the courtyard to point and laugh at his abject humiliation.
However, it was only the foolish ones that laughed. They alone were blissfully unaware of the dangers and had no idea what day it was. The smarter ones, meanwhile, kept their senses alert and their muscles tense. They saw every approaching student as an enemy. Because they knew exactly what day it was and exactly why a student was suspended by their underwear.
It wasn't just any Monday morning. It was the first morning of April. Otherwise known as April Fools' Day.
Normally, the day would call for minor practical jokes and pranks—if anyone even bothered to celebrate it—to be played on friends, enemies, family members, etc. For the most part it was a harmless holiday.
But at Beacon, it had become something more sinister. Whichever teenagers decided to uphold the holiday's pranks however many years ago, it had transformed into a Beacon tradition, in which first through fourth years would try and prank one another.
Some pranksters included their assigned teams in their planning. Others demanded it—leaders mostly. And some even turned on their own partners, eager to one-up one another or avenge petty rivalries.
Regardless, these pranks weren't being performed by average human beings. When your entire campus is basically filled with super-powered teenagers that can bench press cars, run faster than sound, or light themselves on fire… AND those same teenagers are trained combatants with deadly weapons—and a camera—pranks tend to get out of control really easily.
But nothing could compare to the pranks about to be engaged on this day. For on this day, two teams of Huntsmen and Huntresses would agree to test their pranking prowess in a no-holds-barred, free-for-all. Friendships would be tested. Tears would be shed. And one winner would stand amongst them all.
This is their story, which, as was said before, begins on a dreary Monday morning.
"What a dreary Monday morning."
Pyrrha sighed aloud at her spot on the RWBY-JNPR shared table, all the while gazing through the tall windows and watching the rain pelt the ground. The sounds of rumbling thunder shook the cafeteria and signaled what was sure to be a dismal day.
Beside her sat Jaune, leaning over a hearty breakfast of eggs, bacon, fruit, and toast. He took a moment to glance outside before nodding. "Yeah, it's raining cats and dogs out there. Any idea when it's letting up?"
"I believe the forecast said it'll last until eight." The third member of their team, Ren, announced. He had one of his herbal concoctions in his hands; a blend of herbs and vegetables that no one else dared drink for fear of being poisoned. He took a deep sip, smacking his lips in apparent satisfaction.
"Ooh I hope so!" Nora, the fourth member of JNPR, cheered as she came to sit down while balancing a seven foot tall stack of pancakes. "All that thunder outside means there's lightning too! And I want to get a good charge in before combat class!"
"Nora, we've been over this." Ren sighed. "You can't keep climbing Beacon Tower during lightning storms to charge your semblance before class. Not only is it dangerous—and technically cheating—but isn't Ozpin's office up there? What if you get caught?"
"Nah, he's cool with it." Nora dismissed with a wave. "He spotted me one time, asked me what I was up to, and then invited me in for some tea. Now I'm allowed to just take his elevator up instead of climbing. Saves a lot of time."
Nora grabbed the bottle of syrup and stood on her tippy toes in an effort to reach the mountain of pancakes before her. Alas, she was too short to drizzle the sweet, sugary goodness onto her breakfast. Undeterred, Nora took out her weapon, Magnhild, and unfolded it into its hammer form before standing on its head and gripping the handle with her free hand. "Pyrrha, little help here?"
The Mistral-champion rolled her eyes with a smirk before leaning down to touch the head of the warhammer. After making contact, she pulled back and focused her Aura. Her Polarity reached out, cloaking the metal hammer in a dark, magnetic wave, and, with minimal effort on her part, began to rise, carrying a grateful Nora with it. The hammer stopped rising when Nora was level with the peak of her pancake stack, and it was steady enough under Pyrrha's control for the bubbly girl to upend the entire bottle of syrup. It cascaded down much like the heavy rainfall on the windows.
"Thanks Pyrrha!" Was what Nora wanted to say. However, it came out garbled and muffled since Nora was currently shoveling pancakes in her mouth two at a time. Pyrrha laughed lightly at the hammer-wielder's antics, indulging her friend and teammate by keeping her Polarity active until Nora finished her breakfast. It was no trouble for her.
While the four ate and chatted away, idly wondering where there sister team—Team RWBY—was, they noticed a crash from behind. Only Ren and Pyrrha turned to acknowledge it, and they were met with the sight of a first year student frantically waving her hands around with a plate inexplicably glued to them both.
"April Fools!" A giggling second year exclaimed from the side while holding up a bottle of super glue. "Good luck taking today's test with plates for hands!" The first year desperately tried to pry off the plates while a few other students laughed at her misery.
"April Fools?" Pyrrha asked perplexed. "What an odd insult. And why would anyone do that to someone?"
Jaune stopped mid-bite into his eggs and turned to look at his partner. "You're kidding, right?"
Pyrrha shook her head, looking as puzzled as ever. Ren and Nora shot her similar incredulous expressions. "What? Is there something I'm missing?"
"No, no. It's just that… you've never heard of April Fools' Day?"
"Should I have?" Pyrrha asked with a tinge of worry. This was the kind of thing she missed out upon through her friendless years of being the best. She had dedicated her time to training… more because the other kids thought her too talented to be approached. Grades. Looks. Aura. Combat prowess. That's all anyone ever saw in her instead of just a regular girl who wanted some friends.
"Well… it's sort of a—"
*SQUEAK* *SQUEAK*
A noisy squeaking sound, like rusty wheels, halted JNPR's conversation and caused the team's attention to focus in on the new arrivals at their table: Team RWBY.
"Sorry we're late." Weiss groaned while holding two plates of food. One was filled with apple slices, Eggs Benedict, and a Blueberry muffin while the other contained a small stack of Strawberry pancakes, a few strips of bacon, and a single chocolate chip cookie. "We would have been here sooner… but we had to wait for Ruby."
None of Team JNPR had to ask why Ruby, the fastest in their group, would need to be waited for because the next moment, the source of the squeaking sound rolled to a stop beside Weiss.
It could best be described as a human-sized metal bucket, only with four rusty wheels on the bottom for mobility and two, thin metal arms ending in tongs typically used in fireplaces. It looked to be made of various metal casings and parts, all welded together. On its back was a clamp that held Crescent Rose, Ruby's cherished scythe. Space was left for a thin eye slit near the top, and the whole thing was spray painted red, with 'FORT RUBY' spray painted on the front in black.
"Good morning, Jaune!" A voice echoed inside the metal bucket, one of the arms lifting to wave at the blond-haired leader.
"…Ruby?" Jaune asked in surprise, leaning forward to hear her better through the metal barrier. "Is that you in there?"
"Yep!" Ruby exclaimed proudly while Weiss set one of the plates in her hand before the metal monstrosity. She then gazed fixatedly at her own breakfast, determined not to acknowledge the latest crazy idea her partner had concocted.
"She was working on that all night." The third member of Team RWBY, Blake, explained, taking her own seat next to Ruby. She set down a tuna omelet and began to eat it while her other hand held up a book for her to read.
"That noise last night was you?" Ren asked while Nora, having finished her 'light' breakfast, was lowered to the floor beside him. "I thought they were doing construction work."
"Oh, Ruby was doing construction work all right." Yang, the blonde brawler and fourth member of Team RWBY grinned as she sat down beside Blake. Her plate was piled high with sausage, steak, hash browns, and eggs sunny side up. "It's adorable how she thinks she's safe in that tin can."
"I am safe, and this is made of iron, not tin!" Ruby protested, turning to her left before realizing that Yang was actually to the right of her. It was hard to tell where voices were coming from with how thick the metal was. "Fort Ruby is all but impenetrable!"
"Boop." Nora teased, prodding her hammer forward across the table to tip over Fort Ruby. The reaper let out a shocked yelp before the metal clanged to the ground loudly, catching the entire cafeteria's attention. Jaune could see two legs flailing frantically along the bottom.
"Weiss, help! Fort Ruby has been compromised!" She exclaimed, causing Weiss to sink further into her breakfast, ignoring her partner as best she could. It was difficult to do, given the thrashing legs and puppy-like whine. "Save meeeeee!"
"Ugh…" Weiss groaned before pointing her fingers at the metal bucket. A white glyph materialized below it and, with a flick of the wrist, Fort Ruby was propelled with enough force to return to its standing position.
"Hooray!" Ruby cheered. "Nothing can keep down the power of friendship! Thanks, Weiss." One of the metal arms reached out to pat her teammate's head, only for Ruby to misjudge the direction of the voice again and crack a metal arm against Blake's skull. "Oops. Hehe. Sorry, Blake." The cat Faunus clutched her head in agony, book and breakfast forgotten.
Yang rolled her eyes before turning her attention on JNPR. "I bet you're all wondering why Ruby is in that tub."
"Actually, I'm wondering why I didn't get the dinosaur-shaped chicken nuggets." Jaune spoke flatly while eying his breakfast regretfully. "But sure, I'll bite. Why'd she clad herself in metal?"
"Because it's April Fools!" Came the determined voice of Ruby Rose. Jaune thought he could see her silver eyes glowing from the eye slit. "A day of reckoning, in which siblings betray their own family. I hate it!"
"She's being dramatic." Weiss interjected, watching as Ruby dug into the breakfast set before her. She had trouble though, because the metal tongs serving as her hands couldn't grab silverware all that well. "She claims Yang pranks her fiercely every April first, but I'm sure she's just—"
"No, she's right." Yang smiled, unashamed. "I'm a prank master. Dad taught me everything he knows… usually by pranking me and Ruby when we were younger. It was the sweetest revenge when I learned enough to beat him at his own game. Let's just say, payback is too nice a word for what I did to him."
"She became a monster!" Ruby exclaimed, waving her metallic arms in frustration when she failed to grip her fork for the third time. "A prank monster! Dad was bad enough, but she was so much worse! Every year since I was twelve, she'd devise pranks that made me fear the month of April! Buckets of ice water atop doorways, fake cockroaches in my cereal, the prank calls. I can never look forward to Easter when I have to worry about April Fools' Day."
"Oh, so April Fools' Day is a holiday designed for pranking and practical jokes." Pyrrha nodded, understanding the context clues. "So it is done as harmless fun?"
"Usually, yes." Ren agreed sagely with a sideways glance at Nora. "But there are some people who tend to take things too far."
Nora giggled, trying to look innocent with what Ren considered to be the most evil giggle in the world.
"I understand your pain, Ruby." Ren spoke kindly, leaning over to place a comforting hand on Fort Ruby. "Nora has been pranking me for years too. And I daresay each year gets consistently more horrifying." The darkened expression on the young man's face spoke of trauma and pranks too terrible to speak of.
"So… are pranks meant to go too far?" Pyrrha asked, genuinely interested in the topic.
"Well, between siblings, it sometimes gets heated." Jaune explained through a mouthful of eggs. "Take me for instance. I grew up with seven sisters in a household where we had to compete for everything. Food servings, bathroom line-ups. Pranks, as a result, got competitive too. I remember one time, my youngest sister, Jannet, left—yeah, Yang, all my sisters have names starting with 'J'—she left a box addressed to me on the kitchen table. When I opened it up, it was a coconut cream pie set on some sort of spring mechanism so that when I opened it…" He made a slapping sound with his hands. "Pie to the face."
"Oh man, that's gold!" Yang laughed. "I gotta remember that next time for my uncle. You think the same prank could work with booze?"
"I don't think a bottle to the face would be quite as safe as a pie to the face." Weiss advised.
Yang just shrugged. "Eh. He's got Aura."
"It's funny, actually, because—"
"Jaune Arc?"
The blond leader turned to face a new, unfamiliar voice. It was an Atlas soldier, his face covered by a helmet, holding out a package. Behind him, RWBY and JNPR could spot a sack full of packages and letters. He was undoubtedly handing out mail to the students.
"Oh, thanks." Jaune accepted the package, turning it over carefully in his hands. He spotted the sender's signature on an accompanying tag and narrowed his eyes slightly. "Something from home…"
"Ooh, what'd you get?" Nora bounced excitedly. "Is it a gun attachment for your sword? Or a gun attachment for your shield? Or—wait, wait! Is it a legendary gun gun?"
"I have an idea what it is." Jaune chuckled at the hammer-wielder before turning his head to look at the only other male. "Hey, Ren. You're good at catching pancakes after you flip them, right?"
"It's a skill I've honed for many years." Ren nodded proudly. "Culinary prowess is a necessity when cooking for Nora."
"Awesome. Here." He handed Ren his empty plate and unwrapped the package carefully to reveal a simple, blue-wrapped box. He pushed it away delicately as if he was handling a bomb. "When I open this box, I want you to catch whatever flies out of it on that plate. Think you can do that?"
Ren looked perplexed, as did the other six huntresses, but he nodded at his leader's orders.
With that settled, Jaune turned back to the box, settled his hands on both sides of the lid, and quickly pulled it off.
Something launched out of the box, straight into the air as if propelled by a spring. It sailed high, but Ren was prepared. In a feat of acrobatic and culinary skill, the raven-haired boy leaped into the air, catching the projectile on the plate and landing back to the cafeteria floor…
…All without disrupting the pristine coconut cream pie.
"Thanks, Ren." Jaune accepted the pie gratefully as it was handed to him, taking out his fork to cut a slice. The girls of RWBY and JNPR were all looking at Jaune and the pie with mouths agape, prompting the blond to look up. "What, you guys want a slice?"
"No…" Pyrrha began while Nora and Ruby both said 'yes, please!' "How did you…"
"Oh, right, the pie." Jaune realized with a scratch of the head. "Well, Jannet does the same prank to me every April Fools', so I kind of expect it. She knows coconut cream is my favorite too." He spoke fondly as he set aside a slice for himself before cutting up a piece for Nora and Ruby. "I'm touched she actually sent this to me though."
Yang eyed the spring mechanism on the box with interest, no doubt taking notes for when she applied it to her uncle. Meanwhile, Ruby was begging Weiss to feed her the pie since she didn't want her tongs to ruin it.
"She seems like an amateur prankster though." Yang commented, taking one last glance at the blue, spring-loaded box. "I mean, using the same prank every year? You'd think she would use something else after you've figured it out."
"Well, she doesn't know I've figured it out." Jaune smiled, grabbing the remainder of the pie with both hands.
"How could she not…?"
*SLAP*
A wet slapping noise startled everyone at the table as Jaune took the entire pie tin and shoved it into his face. He twisted the pie tin around too, moving his face deep into the cream and crust until, when he lowered the tin, his entire face, neck, and upper jacket were slathered in coconut cream pie.
Jaune, in the shocked silence, used his fingers to clear his eyes. Deep blue blinked out from behind a face of cream. Then he smiled at the shocked expressions of his friends. He withdrew his scroll and took a picture of his cream-smeared face and typed a quick message on it before hitting send. Then, looking casual with pie all over his face, he helped himself to the slice of pie he had set aside.
"…What?" Yang asked, flabbergasted. Blake however, was smiling behind her book.
"He only pretends to be pranked." Blake filled in, to which Jaune nodded. "You just sent your sister that picture of you, didn't you?" Another nod, this one dislodging a bit of cream from Jaune's chin. "Since her sister thinks the same prank keeps working, she keeps doing it. That way, Jaune doesn't have to worry about different pranks."
"But…" Yang looked confused, pointing to the spring-loaded box and then to the pie. "But then why not let yourself get pranked? Why have Ren catch the pie in the first place?"
Jaune blinked, not quite understanding the question. "It's good pie. I wanted a slice." He stated simply, taking another mouthful of the delicious desert.
Pyrrha let out a warm laugh at her partner's words. Letting his little sister think she could always prank him was just like Jaune. Though she had a sneaking suspicion he did it mostly for the delicious pie. Judging by Nora and Ruby's noises of appreciation (Weiss had agreed to feed Ruby some pie), it must have tasted quite good. A part of Pyrrha wondered what it would taste like while a darker part of her mind wondered what it would taste like if she ate it off of Jaune's face.
She hid her blush well, grabbing her napkin and some water to clean Jaune off while Ren helped.
"Anyway, I don't mind being pranked by this." Jaune spoke, gesturing to the pie remains on his clothes. "It's a lot tamer than what my other sisters are probably doing to each other. I hate to think what kind of prank war is raging on at home." He shuddered at the thought, missing Pyrrha taking a delicate lick of the napkin she used to wipe off his face of pie.
"You don't have to tell me twice." Yang agreed. "I know just how bad prank wars can get."
"I always won against Ren," Nora nodded, having finished her pie and yet still somehow hungry, "But I can probably expect prank wars of equally skilled pranksters to be a bit more challenging."
"But I think it's pretty obvious who would win." Ruby spoke from inside her metal fortress.
"Yeah." Yang, Nora, Jaune, and Ruby spoke at the same time. "Me."
The three Huntresses and one Huntsman all widened their eyes when they heard more than one voice repeat the same words. A voice that was not their own.
Eyes suddenly narrowed as they glanced at one another. Yang's momentarily flashed red before, in an instant, her face was wiped clean.
"That's funny, guys." Yang laughed lightly. "But I think I have the most experience. I'm practically a prank goddess—and a dab hand at puns."
"Goddess, shmodess!" Nora dismissed. "Have you ever tied someone in a blanket cocoon and left them in a movie theater playing the most mushiest, chick-flickiest, chick-flick in the history of terrible movies?" A soft thud coming from Ren's head falling onto the table told everyone he had been victimized so. "Because I have! And Ren still has the emotional scars! Go ahead, Ren, show them!"
"Hey! I'm just as emotionally scarred as Ren!" Ruby piped up from her metal container. She would have looked more impressive if there weren't bits of pie sticking around her eye slit. "And in case you haven't realized, Fort Ruby is standing tall!"
Yang got up and pushed Ruby back, the metal tub clanging loudly to the floor once more. "Ahh! Sneak attack! Weiss! Engage Glyph thrusters, please!"
Weiss rolled her eyes and used her semblance to right her teammate. Jaune took the moment to speak. "I grew up with seven pranking sisters. If anyone can avoid getting pranked, it's me."
With them all having said their piece, their eyes narrowed dangerously, flicking to one another as if daring them to try and prank them right then and there. The atmosphere grew tense, and Pyrrha had no idea what to do to fix it.
Blake flipped a page of her book, trying to beat her record of caring less.
"Let's all just take a breath and relax." Ren, the voice of reason, spoke evenly. The four teenagers were like a dust canister about to explode. "We're all friends here. There's no need to start some kind of prank war—"
Nora let out an exaggerated gasp, standing up and smacking the table with both hands. "Ren's right! We should have a prank war!"
"Wha—No. That's not what I—"
"Took the words right out of mouth!" Yang pumped a fist into the air. "I can take on you wannabe pranksters any day!"
"Really not what I was getting at—"
"It'll be a free-for-all!" Nora cheered excitedly. "Eight pranksters vying for the chance at glory!"
Blake and Weiss' eyes widened at those words.
"…Eight?" Weiss faltered.
"…Please tell me the other four are Weiss, Pyrrha, Ren, and not me." Blake whined.
"Oh come on, Blake." Ruby attempted to pat the Faunus' head, only to crack Fort Ruby's arm against her skull again. "It'll be fun! Plus, it never hurts to have prank fodder when Yang is concerned."
"You expect me to play some… some… juvenile game and act the part of prank fodder?" Weiss turned on Fort Ruby. "How can you say that about your own partner?"
"…Fort Ruby isn't big enough for two." Ruby explained. "I mean… it could be if I took out the mini-fridge and TV, buuuut…" The reaper trailed off.
"Well I don't mind." Pyrrha said, eager to take part in her first prank war. "It sounds grand."
"Pyrrha…" Jaune leaned over to whisper to the champion. "It probably won't be as 'grand' as you're expecting." She raised an inquisitive brow. "April Fools is still new to you so why not get a little more prank experience before –"
"What better way to get experience than a prank war?" Pyrrha asked. "If it's a free-for-all contest I'll be able to learn how to prank from everyone."
"Yeah… but—"
"Do you not want me to be included?" Pyrrha asked innocently, her green eyes looking wounded.
"No! No, not at all!" Jaune backtracked instantly, not wanting his partner to feel upset. "I'm sure you'd make a great prankster… it's just that…" He glanced to Nora and Yang and the look of fierce determination in their eyes. Including Pyrrha in a prank war with those two was like throwing a gazelle to a pair of lions. "I'm just… I…" One more look at those green eyes was enough to make Jaune hang his head in resignation. "…Welcome to the prank war."
Pyrrha immediately beamed in happiness. "Wonderful! Don't worry, Jaune. This 'pranking' might seem daunting, but I'm certain I can pick it up easily. Maybe you could even teach me a thing or two?" She added hopefully.
While Jaune chuckled sheepishly Yang and Nora were gripping their respective partners tightly, preventing them from fleeing participation in the war. Ren, knowing arguing against Nora was like trying to swim up a waterfall, silently accepted his own inclusion in the contest. Better to get pranked early and be done with it.
Blake, however, was more stubborn.
"I don't want to be in a war after hearing about your prank reputation." Blake protested, clawing at Yang's strong hold on her stomach.
Weiss was of a similar mind. "We have tests and reports due this week. You all may have time to goof off, but I refuse to tarnish the Schnee name with less-than-perfect grades." She huffed, pushing Fort Ruby away from her.
Yang frowned looking at her two teammates. She was sure no amount of badgering would persuade them to join; they were both too proud and stubborn.
So, with a small grin playing upon her face, she resorted to her tactic of last resort: Bribery.
"Well, gosh." Yang sighed, releasing Blake who instantly darted away from the blonde. "That's too bad for you, but hey, that just means two less people trying to win the prize." She put extra emphasis on the last word and watched with smug satisfaction as Weiss' ears perked and Blake's bow twitched twice.
"…What prize?" Blake asked suspiciously.
"Oh…" Yang sing-songed with a dramatic wave. "Nothing much. Just the best prize anyone could ever ask for."
"Don't play games, Xiao Long." Weiss accused jabbing the blonde with her finger. "What prize could possibly be worth us risking embarrassment to your childish pranks?"
"Well, since you asked," Yang smirked, pausing for dramatic effect, "how about, the winner—the last one to be pranked—can ask one request from each of the losers. Think about it, Weiss," she saw the spark of interest in the heiress' eyes and knew she had her by the metaphorical balls. "You could request Ruby to stop eating on your bed, you could ask Pyrrha to throw a fight for you in Goodwitch's class, or—listen to this—you could get me to stop telling puns… forever."
Weiss' eyes widened a fraction at the tantalizing offer. It was risky, sure. Yang prided herself on her puns just as much as her pranks. But she was confident enough that her pranking prowess could handle both teams with ease.
"…Seafood."
"Eh?" Yang turned to the dark-haired bookworm, though her book lay forgotten beside her breakfast.
"I want seafood." Blake's amber eyes burned with a competitive ferocity. "When I win, I want everyone to chip in and buy me seafood buffets for the rest of the month." She spoke as if she had already won. "I'm talking tuna, salmon, shrimp, lobster, cod. The finest seafood platter in Remnant."
"Oho!" Yang grinned challengingly at the Faunus' words. "Looks like the prize was enough for Blake to sink her claws into. I knew a little fish would change her tuna."
A silence settled over the cafeteria at the blonde's words, broken only by an awkward cough from Jaune.
"That settles it." Weiss grimaced, knowing she was walking right into Yang's trap. "I'll acquiesce, but only to rid our dorm of your hated puns… and perhaps some of those others things you mentioned." She turned to regard the others, already working out which request to make of each of them. She wouldn't mind Ren serving as her personal cake butler for a week.
"You're all going down!" Nora cheered, stomping her feet excitedly. "I can see my prize now. Breakfast in bed every Sunday, courtesy of Ren. And I'll have him in a maid costume and everything. He'll look soooo cute!"
"I'd like to take certain requests off the table." Ren pleaded.
"Denied." Ruby, Weiss, Blake, Yang, and Nora all shot down in unison.
"It's only fun if we can ask for anything." Yang grinned evilly at the poor boy.
"Though Ren makes a good point. We need to establish the rules early on and reach an agreement on them." Weiss noted, already reaching into her bag to take out a pen and paper.
"No rules! It's a prank war! Anything goes!" Nora shouted to which Yang heartily agreed.
"We need guidelines." Weiss stressed, looking unimpressed with their boisterous cheers. "For one, I don't want pranks that will get us in trouble with the faculty. Nor do I want anything severe enough to traumatize us for life."
Everyone conceded those two points and suddenly understood the need for rules.
"How long should the war last? A week?" Fort Ruby turned to regard Yang. "Or until there's only one left standing?"
"Why not both?" Blake suggested. "It can last the week or sooner if everyone else gets pranked."
"I'm fine with that as long as everyone else is fine with the possibility of having more than one winner." Weiss' pen hovered over the paper, waiting for someone to protest.
"Oh, don't you worry." Yang smirked. "They'll be only one winner."
"Yep! And her name's Ruby Rose!" Fort Ruby cheered, waving its tongs around.
"Did I hear right? You losers are starting a prank war?"
The mocking voice caused Jaune to flinch reflexively and made Pyrrha place a protective hand on Jaune's shoulder. Everyone turned to the source of the new voice: Cardin Winchester.
"I couldn't help but overhear." He sneered, placing a hand on the table.
"Well, try a bit harder next time." Yang replied, frowning at the bully.
After the Forever Fall field trip, he had been noticeably tamer in his acts of bullying. He and his team had stopped picking on the weaker students and Faunus. That didn't mean he wasn't still a jerk, though. Teams RWBY and JNPR weren't so quick to forgive and forget after how he treated Jaune.
"Hey, easy." Cardin held a hand up appeasingly. "I'm not here to start anything. In fact, I'm here to offer some friendly assistance to your prank war."
"We don't need your help, thanks." Pyrrha dismissed curtly, glaring at the boy. As forgiving and polite as she was, she greatly disliked Cardin for how he bullied her partner. Wiping the floor with him and his team one combat class had dulled her enmity, but it was still there. "Now if you'd be so kind as to leave our table…"
"Pyrrha, it's okay." Jaune calmed his partner down with just a few words before looking up at Cardin. "How exactly could you help with our war?"
"Well, since you asked so nicely Jauney Boy…" Cardin smirked at the knight still covered in pie. "I caught the tail-end of what you eight are wagering. Pretty hefty stakes, if you ask me—"
"Nobody did." Blake growled.
"—But how are you going to separate the pranks from the mild inconveniences? A prank war like this needs an impartial judge, right?" Cardin folded his arms arrogantly. "Someone that can announce the true Prank King."
"Or Queen!"
"And that somebody is you?" Weiss looked unconvinced. "What qualifications do you have—?"
"I wasn't talking about me." Cardin smirked before pointing at the list of rules before Weiss. "What if I told you I knew somebody who could make sure those rules are upheld AND can act as fair arbitrator for your little prank war?"
Everyone looked to one another with raised brows. They had to admit, even though Cardin was an asshole, he was very good at peaking their interest.
"How?" Weiss asked.
"Meet me after combat class tomorrow and I'll show you." Cardin promised, glancing to Fort Ruby with an amused chortle. "All of you better show up if you're serious about this war. Bring your rules too. Trust me. My guy can work his magic on them."
"Why are you helping us?" Jaune asked, voicing everyone's confusion as to why Cardin Winchester was offering them aid. "What do you have to gain?"
"Hey, I'm a simple guy with simple needs." Cardin smirked as he walked off. "Plus, it'll be worth it to watch the eight of you losers prank the heck out of each other."
After Combat Class, Teams RWBY and JNPR met with Cardin and followed him down the corridors of Beacon. Weiss had finished making the list of rules and had it prepared for whatever guy Cardin had mentioned. The rules were as follows:
1.) The day after it is signed, the Prank War is to last one week or until one prankster is left.
2.) A prankster is considered out of the running after being significantly pranked by another prankster. This rule only applies to the initial eight competitors. Pranksters besides the initial competitors will have no bearing on the Prank War unless they are assisting one of the initial eight in a prank.
3.) Once out of the running, any pranks a prankster commits or has prepared will be deemed void in determining a winner.
4.) Alliances and teams are allowed, as are betrayals and backstabbing. Subterfuge is encouraged. Trust at your own risk.
5.) Any prankster that triggers their prank during a class or in the presence of a Faculty member will be disqualified from the Prank War and whatever damage caused by their prank will be deemed void.
6.) In the event that a single winner isn't left after the aforementioned time limit, the remaining pranksters will be declared victorious and entitled to the same spoils.
7.) The winner(s) will be allowed to ask one favor from each of the losers. The favors must be honored, no matter how humiliating or demeaning.
Leave it to Weiss to draft the rules like a contract. Her Schnee background enabled her to address every possible issue with no room for loopholes.
"Here we are." Cardin announced to the eight teenagers behind him. He had led them to a dorm room.
The bully knocked twice before stepping back. There was a clamor behind the door before it slowly creaked open and a single brown eye blinked from the darkness. "Password?" Came a reedy voice.
"Give it a rest, Sky. I forgot my Scroll." Cardin pushed open the door, forcing Sky Lark to stumble back. "Also, why are all the lights off?"
"Sorry…" Sky quickly flicked the lights on, illuminating the dilapidated and messy room for everyone to see. There was one giant bed and then a triple bunk bed in the corner that presumably belonged to Cardin's teammates. Clothes were lying all over the floor and the curtains of the window were stained and drawn, blocking out sunlight. There were a few posters of birds littering the wall and some desks that looked unused.
Team RWBY all wrinkled their noses at the state of their room. Come to think of it, none of them had ever witnessed the horror of an all-male dorm room before.
"If I knew we were having guests I would have tidied up." Russel Thrush—or Unnamed Bully #1 as Yang knew him—called out from his seat on the middle bunk. "What's the deal bringing over these losers, Cardin?"
Yang and Nora bristled at the insult, but Cardin stopped them.
"We just came here to have Dove work his magic." He smirked. "These guys are having a Prank War."
Russel and Sky stood up a bit straighter and Dove Bronzewing peeked his head over the side of the top bunk. His bunk was perched so close to the ceiling that the group hadn't noticed him.
"They have something to Validate?" Dove asked in a surprisingly soft voice to which Cardin nodded, pointing to Weiss' list of rules. "All right, give me a minute…"
As the armored teen climbed down from his top bunk, Russel and Sky gathered around, looking excited.
"Oh man, we get to see his Semblance in action!" Russel's mohawk quivered in anticipation.
"His Semblance?" Jaune asked Team CRDL's leader who smirked at the question.
"Yeah. You losers are in for a treat." Cardin boasted as Dove made his way to the table and held out an expectant hand. Cardin quickly snatched the rules from Weiss' hand and handed them to the light-brown haired teen.
Dove squinted his eyes at the rules (an act that was bizarre due to his eyes being perpetually squinted), and placed a hand on the paper. A golden glow began to surround him as his Semblance activated. Ethereal chains made of the same golden Aura sprouted from his arm and clinked towards the paper. The chains surrounded the paper before seemingly sinking into it, enveloping it in the same golden glow coming off of Dove.
"Whoa, that is kind of cool…" Fort Ruby muttered as she watched the events from her eye slit. "So… what's he doing?"
"Dove's Semblance is Validate." Sky explained to the curious teenagers. "It allows him to make literal binding contracts. Anyone that signs or makes a promise to whatever he Validates will be forced to follow through."
"It sounds weak, but it's actually pretty powerful." Cardin nodded. "When we first got this room we had a big fight over who got which bed and how much closet space each of us deserved." He hiked a thumb to Dove. "So he makes us a contract evenly separating the closet space and, like idiots, we all sign without reading it. Long story short, there's a reason all our clothes are strewn about as if we have nowhere to put them."
"That's quite the handy Semblance." Weiss nodded in appreciation. "Sounds like you'd make an exceptional contractor."
"Well, that's what my father wanted." Dove explained while more golden chains sunk into the paper. "Said I could make a name for the family by Validating legally binding contracts. I kept telling him I wanted to fight Grimm, though, so we had a big fight and—"
"Yeah, yeah, blah, blah, she didn't ask for your life story." Yang cut off rudely. "So are you done with that thing or not?"
"Almost." Dove replied curtly as he took out a pen and added an additional rule to the document. Weiss looked a bit nervous at the addition, but calmed down when she saw it.
8.) The signatures below will turn gold whenever that prankster is considered out of the running.
"Fair?" He asked as he pulled his hand away from the paper and the last chain melted into it. Weiss and everyone else nodded. "Now you all just have to sign it."
"Look it over carefully." Cardin warned. "Now that it's Validated, you're agreeing to everything there as soon as you sign."
Weiss scrutinized the document with the same care as defusing a bomb. Her team watched her carefully, knowing it would only be safe to sign if she signed first.
Satisfied that there were no loopholes or hidden dangers in her flawless draft, Weiss signed the rules with an elaborate flourish.
Blake scrawled out her name in neat, tidy writing.
Ren's signature was more traditional with the characters that made up his name.
Nora doodled a picture of herself with a crown on her head that read, Prank Queen.
"Is that all right?" Pyrrha referred to Nora's unique signature.
"As long as it's written from her." Dove nodded. "And nobody can have someone else write down their signature." He added just as Fort Ruby was about to ask Weiss to sign as the tongs couldn't grab the pen.
"Awww." Ruby's voice echoed before Weiss merely shoved the pen into the eye slit and had Ruby hold it with her teeth while she pressed the paper to it in a messy scrawling of her name, Ruby Rose.
Jaune signed next with Pyrrha placing her practiced signature right beside his.
And then Yang simply crushed the pen in her hand, smearing the ink all over it, before stamping the paper with it. The black handprint missed all the other signatures, but caused Weiss to frown over the loss of her favorite pen.
"What?" Yang grinned unashamed at her signature. "It has character."
Dove quickly placed his other hand on the paper and allowed his Semblance to activate again. The golden chains rose from the paper this time, while a golden lock appeared in Dove's other hand. He fastened it through the chains. Once the lock closed with a click, the golden chains and lock all vanished in a flurry of golden light particles. "Done. Now nobody can add rules or signatures to the Validation."
"Thanks, Dove." Cardin held up the paper with the eight signatures on it. "Since we're going to be judging this war do you want us to hold onto these rules? You can just come to us whenever you have a question about them."
"I suppose that's fair." Blake nodded, already motioning to leave the dilapidated room. Yang and Fort Ruby were right behind her, but for different reasons. They had pranks to prepare.
"Thank you for judging our contest." Weiss nodded gratefully. "I do hope you will judge us in a fair, impartial way."
"So, Jaune." Pyrrha asked as the two partners made their way into the corridor. "Care to get in some quick prank training before the war begins? I could really use your help."
"Sure thing, Pyrrha." Jaune smiled. "We'll start off small, and I'll teach you the most important lesson of all: How to evade pranks altogether."
"I can't wait."
"Hey, Renny?" Nora asked sweetly as she skipped beside her partner and life-long friend. "Do you want to be pranked right off the bat? Or would you rather I save the best for last?"
Ren groaned in distress, wondering which option was more merciful.
AN: Random concluding words.