90210

The darkness is a comfort. It allows him to hide from prying eyes and embrace his real personality – to live as he longs to, to spend time with his lover…his boyfriend. It would have been such a foreign concept a few months ago – Teddy Montgomery, a gay, back then he'd been head over heels in love with Silver, their relationship was meant to be one of the ones that lasted, a High School sweetheart romance, the kind that ended with three children in a paradise of suburban living. That was all change now. He'd awoken hung-over, unaware that he'd hooked up with Ian, then gradually the image had become clearer, much as his head had tried to fight it, his heart had been waging a better war against his head. He was in love with Ian…he liked guys…he was gay and he had a lover…or a boyfriend…he couldn't even decide that his head was so messed up. He looked down at his sleeping beau, the smaller, skinnier frame curled up in his arms…it felt good, unimaginably good – it just felt so right, in bed with Ian – why then was his head still trying to slow things down rather than stop things, why couldn't it just give into the love burning at his heart? Because he went to West Bev. and the Student Body had more jackasses than people who could accept it, he didn't know if he was strong enough yet, to face his critics and stand up as boldly as Ian had in the 9th Grade and shout from the rooftops that he was gay.

His thoughts must have been being projected somehow because his thoughts trailed away into nothingness Ian stirred, the smaller boy looking up into the deep-blue eyes of his stud, his lip faltered, somehow on some wavelength he must have picked up on Teddy's inner problems.

"What time is it?" he murmured drowsily, leaning over Teddy to get a look at the alarm clock, he groaned as the red lettering told him it was 4:30 AM, he rolled back into Teddy's embrace and allowed a silence to settle upon them for a few moments as he weighed up how to approach the issue. "Are you worried?"

Teddy stiffened. Worried was an understatement, he was terrified about coming out, terrified about how they'd look at him: Silver, Liam, Naomi…and the others…how could he deal with that? Deal with the possibility that none of them would ever speak to him again? Perhaps he was wrong to presume they wouldn't speak to him, but, how would they look at him? He'd seen the looks Liam and the other guys on the Surf Team gave guys like Ian, it wasn't a look of hostility just a look of awkwardness, a look that said get lost, could he deal with that? Was he even ready to tell anyone? And what about Silver? How would she take this?

"I'm scared that they won't talk to me, that I'll be on my own…apart from you…I don't even know how my Dad will react, he's already disappointed with me about Tennis, being gay on top and he'll kick me out on the street…how did you do it, risk everything?" he asked, eyes wide with fear.

"I wasn't risking everything Teddy, being gay was everything about me…there wasn't a point in carrying on as I was, I was ready to show the world who I was, so I did it. My parents weren't too crazy about the idea, some of my friends didn't want to know me," he paused, reflecting on his memories, "but most of them stood by me, most of yours will too – and those that don't aren't worth it," he stroked his boyfriend's arm reassuringly, "Teddy I like you…I think I might even love you, don't think this over too much, take it one step at a time."

"So you think I should tell someone else?" he quizzed.

"If your ready then I think you should tell someone you can trust, its fine for us to kiss and do…other stuff but I'm only one person Teddy, having someone else you can talk to about this might be helpful, really helpful, maybe…maybe you should speak to Silver, she might be your ex Teddy but she's understanding and she probably knows you the best, better than I know you." Teddy stiffened again, moving away from Ian's touch, "Hey," he said following him and stroking his biceps again, playfully this time, "it's just an idea, you don't have to do it…besides – I want to show you how much I like you."

He swung his leg over Teddy's body, leaned down and kissed his boyfriend gently, swapping tongues, allowing the muscled hunk to run his hands over him before flipping him over and kissing him more passionately, moving onto Ian's neck, half-kissing and half-biting at it. He could put aside his personal convictions, and beliefs, hide this part of his life because he knew someday they could be together in the open, that he could be with Teddy around his friends and he could help Teddy feel comfortable in his own skin and be able to express himself without a fear of what his friends might think or might say. Tonight they could make love and in the morning he could help Teddy take the next step, he could help him find himself and ground himself, that would be the hardest part, the most difficult for Teddy, and Ian would do everything he could to help him. To protect him from the pain he'd felt doing it alone, the pain of losing those he cared about.

…

It felt perfect. It felt amazing. It felt like this was where she'd needed to be all along, in Liam's arms, her head resting on his chest, listening to his slowly beating heart, her hand stroking his beautiful chest, he was awake to, she knew, his was smiling every time her hands caressed his chest, she began pulling at them playfully and his eyes flickered open, warm and inviting to her touch.

"Hey," he greeted, "something the matter?"

She so wanted to pretend that there wasn't anything, that this was her finally living her dream after getting the green light from Naomi, that being in bed with Liam…that sleeping with Liam was what she had wanted all along, ever since Jasper and even before then that there had only been Liam in her life, only Liam that she wanted for, longed for, that she desired: but that wasn't the truth. Now Charlie was in the picture. She liked Liam, she even loved him…a little…but Charlie, Charlie was a playwright…they had so much in common, too much in common – they both loved the theatre, different aspects of it, but they loved it. What did she have in common with Liam? Good looks? She shook of those thoughts, she wanted Liam, she only had eyes for him…for now anyway.

"No, I'm just happy we're finally together."

How would Charlie react? She'd slept with Liam, they'd kissed, express feelings for one another and now they were lying in bed and she was acting as though Charlie had never existed, she felt like a bitch for doing it, she was a bitch for doing it – how could she have done this? Charlie was so gentle and kind, and so completely different compared the people she'd become used to in LA, he wasn't superficial, he hated people like that. What you saw was what you got with Charlie, he was refreshingly normal compared to her surroundings. And she'd thrown that back in his face, returned all the kindness he'd shown her with a senseless, slutty act, and the worst thing was she had enjoyed being with Liam.

"I'm happy too, Annie I've waited so long to be able to be like this with you," he said sweetly, "me and Naomi…we couldn't relate to one another, our relationship was just…sex…with you it's more than that, spending time with you makes me feel amazing, I want to spend every waking moment I have left with you," there was a creak beyond the door, Annie grimaced, "Dixon?" mouthed Liam.

Annie nodded worriedly: now what to do, if Dixon walked in then she would be exposed as having cheated on Charlie…she swore under her breath and mentally hoped against hope that he wouldn't try the door, that the handle would move, warning the opening of the door and the arrival of Dixon. She heard the other bedroom door open and slam and breathed a sigh of relief – she was safe. She leaned into the safety of Liam's embrace and buried her head in his chest, she could escape her thoughts till morning, then the nightmare would begin again.

…

Teddy was kissing Ian?

Or was Ian kissing Teddy? However it had happened there had been kissing and Ian…and Teddy and that equation just didn't add up for Dixon – his friend Teddy, the player, Silver's ex…the ultra-macho hunk and star of the Surf Team…was gay? Not that Dixon was a homophobe – that was completely the wrong idea, he was comfortable with gays…he was friends with Ian after all. He was just a little surprised. Teddy had always seemed on the straight and narrow, he'd been madly in love with Silver, they'd been so romantic it had seemed like they'd last forever. They'd broken up but Dixon hadn't realized it was because Teddy was gay.

Maybe that wasn't the reason…maybe it had only just dawned on Teddy…or maybe he'd misunderstood what he'd seen? That had to be it – a misunderstanding, the tall, muscular blonde hadn't been Teddy, the shorter, skinny brunette hadn't been Ian…they'd just been that other identical gay couple at West Bev…alright so it had been them…that didn't explain how it had happened. It didn't tell Dixon what he should do with the information now…did he ask Teddy or Ian about it? How would they react? He didn't want to get in a fight with either of them, he just wanted an answer. Did anyone else know? Judging by the passionate kiss in a stairway away from the main party he guessed not, who else could he talk to about this?

CAN I SEE YOU TOMORROW MORNING, IT'S IMPORTANT, DIXON X

He hit send and then changed and got into bed, it was way too late and he was going to be tired but he need to talk to someone, although for now he could escape into the warm embrace of sleep and think it over. As his eyelids opened and closed ever more slowly as tiredness crept upon him he had one recurring thought, how was Teddy dealing with it…with being gay, clearly it was something new to him, and something he wanted to keep hidden, at least for the moment. He'd speak to Silver in the morning, maybe she could make better sense of this than he could.

…

"Crap," she yelled checking her inbox, "you need to go…now!" She hurled Navid out of bed, getting a groan out of him.

"Why?" he asked sleepily, yawning loudly.

"Dixon's on his way here, and he can't see you here because you're still going out with Adrianna and…and…and oh my god I slept with you!" Silver swooped down and collected his clothes, hurling them at him and hurrying him away and out of the house, barely giving him time to throw his clothes on and get out of the house. She slammed the door behind him and then moved to the breakfast bar pouring herself a mug of coffee and running the events of last night through her mind again, she'd kissed Navid at Adrianna's Party and then they'd left and come back to hers and then…then they'd slept together…and she'd like it – how could she have been so stupid? Giving into her emotions and sleeping with her best-friend's boyfriend was an absolute no-no as defined in High School 101.

She'd have to tell Adrianna…before Navid did…she needed telling, she couldn't just sit on this…or treat it as a one-night thing…it wasn't a one-night thing…this was something more powerful than that, Navid knew that…so did she…but, what did that mean as far as Adrianna was concerned? Had she pushed Navid away by being too distant, was Silver the rebound? She didn't want to be that rebound, but that would be too clean cut an explanation anyway, it wasn't like a rebound, she and he had understood each other on a different wavelength, love had been in the air and she'd felt the electricity associated with it. She didn't have time to think about it anymore, she had Dixon to deal with, and he'd be there any moment.

What would she say to him? Could she tell him? And why did he need to speak to her? Had he seen her with Navid at the Party…they could have picked a more secluded spot, any number of people could have seen them out there…that someone hadn't seen her was too lucky, that was why he was coming – to tell her about what he'd seen. Dixon might have moved on from being the bitter ex but he'd have Teddy's back this time, news about how quickly she'd moved on would spread and suddenly Silver would be number one on the lynch list.

Naomi would know what to do, she'd been in situations like this before and usually Silver was the one whose advice was sought, now the table had been reversed.

…

Golden sunlight was now streaming through the windows into the kitchen, Annie was sipping at a mug of coffee, the note from Dixon on the fridge about him leaving early was pretty obvious - he'd gone to see Silver and wouldn't be back till later on, that left her and Liam alone in the house. Alone. She didn't want to be alone with him, she'd thought after a night to think on it she'd have settled her inner disquiet but it had only gotten louder, her being torn between Charlie and Liam – between the brothers. Being alone with Liam didn't help matters, she needed alone time to clear her head.

On cue Liam cruised into the kitchen, dressed only in pyjama bottoms, his gorgeous physique staring out at her like a punch in a face…he certainly had the physical advantage, but, it was having something in common with him that troubled her, not his natural handsomeness. She approached him as normally as she could muster and returned his kiss, locking her arms around his neck and then breaking apart when she felt the kiss had lasted long enough to satisfy Liam nothing was wrong but not too long that Liam suspected something.

"You made breakfast?" Liam asked, semi-stunned.

Annie hit him softly on the arm at his incredulous-look, "I can cook, I made you pancakes – we have to keep your strength up now that you're fresh out of hospital, you still have some wounds." She took notice of them, they were healing up now, though they still looked pretty severe, "Why did you get into a fight Liam?"

"It was nothing," he said, Annie stepped away from him, "I tried not to get involved, I really did Annie but…it just happened okay," he tried to step closer to her but she moved away, "what's the matter – something's been bugging you since last night?"

Annie froze on the spot, could she tell him?

"I'm hung up on whether to choose you or Charlie okay?" she wanted to say, instead all she could manage was, "I'm fine…I'm just a little shaken by what happened to you, I don't know what I'd do if it happened again – I can't lose you Liam, you're to much a part of my life now."

"Annie it'll never happen again, trust me." He implored her, gesturing for her to return to his arms, Annie submitted and moved to his embrace, planting her lips on his and giving into her emotion again…she had to…it was the only way.

…

The sun was rising ever higher in the sky, another idyllic day, Ian looked over at his stud, his beautiful boyfriend and instantly was overtaken by the urge to kiss him, leaning in and planting one upon him, they might have had to express their love in secret on a secluded stretch of beach out of the way but they were together in the open, Ian pulled back from the kiss and smiled at Teddy.

"What was that for?" Teddy probed.

"To show that I…I love you Teddy, you're beautiful and sensitive and I…I wanted you to know that, know that I'm not upset with you or sad about it – that I'm completely ok with waiting and giving you a breathing space."

"I always knew that," Teddy responded quickly, smiling and kissing Ian again, "I've decided something, I'm going to go and speak to Silver today…she needs to know and she's friends with you – I think that she's the other person I need to know."

Ian pinched his arm reassuringly, "I'm proud of you Teddy, very proud."

…

"You cannot be serious, tell me you're joking – Teddy and Ian? In bed together?" Silver suddenly burst into an incontrollable laugh at the ridiculousness of the statement – her ex-Boyfriend kissing her gay-friend who he'd been a homophobic jerk to only a couple of weeks earlier? Dixon really needed to get better on his jokes, this was just a little too wild a story for her to believe…I mean come-on Dixon seriously at least make it half-believable.

"I'm being serious, I was heading back up to the party and then there they were, Ian against the wall and Teddy kissing him, Silver why would I make this up? I don't have any reason to lie about this do I – I'm Teddy's friend and Ian's why would I make something up?" Silver had to admit he had a point, but, she couldn't get her head around it, clearly he'd misunderstood.

"Your probably just got confused Dixon, I can understand Ian but not Teddy, we only just broke up – unless you're suggesting I turned him gay?" again she laughed involuntarily.

"That's not what I'm saying," he protested, "just consider it, maybe he hadn't realized this – I mean wouldn't it explain all his aggro with Ian? Look at the facts Silver, you break up with Teddy, he starts acting out then he gets into a fight with Ian, maybe…maybe Ian caught him out and Teddy couldn't deal with it and then…then Ian helps him and then they start a relationship. Did you see how Teddy was looking at Ian at the luau at first I hadn't made the connection but now…now it makes sense."

Silver allowed a mental flashback to the party, Teddy had seemed on edge, since the morning actually, then he'd come upstairs and he'd seemed calm, completely calm, then she'd seen Ian leave to, had the left together? Was she just getting drawn into Dixon's story? No, she decided, it wasn't just Dixon there was something about the facts coming to light, Teddy exploding at Ian before the Bachelor Auction and then calming down suddenly, the events of the past few weeks flashed before her eyes and then it all made sense.

"Oh my God, Teddy's gay."

"Thank you for being here to listen," Dixon confided, "do you need me for anything else?"

She half considered telling him about her issues but decided against it, Dixon seemed to have enough on his plate now.

"Now it's cool, you go – I'll see you later."

"See you later." Dixon said, leaving her alone again. As soon as he left she flipped open her phone and hit her speed-dial for Naomi, her friend needed to hear this and she needed to air her own problems.

…

It was all coming back now.

The rape, Cannon…Atherton walking about West Bev. like nobody could stop him, like he was walking unchecked and his reign of terror would have continued, was now continuing, she was alone and trapped in her room and the last call she'd made had told Oscar to leave her alone and that she couldn't date him, nobody would come looking for her and she was trapped with him, on her own. She shrank back as he advanced upon her, looking around for something to hit him with – to defend herself. There was nothing, he'd already laid the groundwork.

"Hello Naomi, it's nice to see you again." He grinned sadistically, "I must say you and your friend were very clever, but I was always one step ahead of you, you didn't really think you'd escaped me did you? Oh Naomi…how terribly naïve of you Naomi, but, don't worry I'm going to have my revenge and make sure that you never forget me."

"Get…away…from me…you fricking pervert." She yelled at the top of her lungs, "Help, help!" At once he was on top of her, his hands cupped over her mouth, her phone rang suddenly, the icon flashed up with caller ID: Silver.

"How interesting, your friend Silver." he grabbed at the phone, hitting the reject and then opening the text menu HEY, WHY DON'T YOU DROP BY MY ROOM WE CAN HAVE LUNCH XXX and sent it, grinning maliciously at her, "Looks like she'll be joining us, for some extra-curricular activity."

Naomi let out a long, hard scream before he cupped his hands over her mouth and produced tape, sealing her mouth.

…

All reviews welcome, if it's liked I'll try and do some more chapters but no promises, this was quite hard to write as a fanfic – my first 90210 one! Enjoy! X