Title: Sugar Sex
Rating: M - NC-17...not really sure, it's pretty juicy though
Author: darkalbino, illi, me (me, myself and I)
Requested by/Written for (subtly! Megan you sneaky ho! conning me into reading that so I would be inspired to write this! I see through your devilish schemes!): marimo's head lover
I swear. If I get any more one-shot ideas, my brain is going to fry from the overload.
Summary: Sasuke doesn't like sweets? Ha, that's what he thinks.
Warnings: SasuNaruSasu, language, lemon, food play! that's right loves, feel the nosebleeds!
Disclaimer: I have taken the liberty of urinating on every Naruto character (except Sakura, I killed her) even though I am female. Therefore, they are now my MARKED property. MARKED. CAPS LOCK. THE CAPS LOCK MAKES IT SO! OBEY THE CAPS!
readers: again dark, did you take your medication this morning?
illi: did you take your SHUT THE HELL UP this morning?!
readers: Ah, touché.
lol, courtesy of Naruto Abridged.
Enjoy!
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"I'm hot, sticky sweet
From my head, to my feet..."
"Pour Some Sugar On Me", Def Leppard
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XXXSugar SexXXX
"A token of my--"
"But--"
"Undying love--"
"I don't--"
"And obsess--I mean, affection--"
"Sakura--"
"For you!"
The woman shoved a ruby-red, heart shaped box and a bouquet of matching roses to his chest, "Happy Valentine's Day Sasuke-kun!"
Sasuke sighed heavily and wrapped his arms around the gifts. But something clicked in his brain. His gaze flicked to the girl, brow furrowed, "Wait a minute..."
Sakura tilted her head, eyes closed merrily with a sweet smile, "Yes Sasuke-kun?"
The Uchiha glanced at the gifts, then back to Sakura, "We're in July."
The kunoichi's eyes flew open, smile faltering, "Uh..."
A dark brow slowly rose.
"Er..." Sakura looked at him, "...Iloveyou!" she shouted. Then spun around and ran away.
Sasuke blinked and stared at the gifts in his hands. "Crazy whore" he muttered. He considered dropping the items he held and leaving them on the ground...but burning them would be so much more fun.
Sasuke's lips tilted as he turned and went back into his home, shutting the door with his foot.
He started down a hallway. Walking towards a vacant room where he could fire jutsu this crap and laugh evilly as it burned to a crisp. But before Sasuke could reach his destination, Naruto suddenly popped out from around a corner and stood before him, blocking his path. He was clad in nothing but a pair of orange boxers with blue swirls and crossed arms over his sun-kissed chest.
Sasuke felt his lips spread out further. Yes, he's forgotten he'd been a bit...pre-occupied with the blonde before the pink slut showed up.
"Who was at the door?" Naruto asked.
"Bitc...er, Sakura."
Naruto's eyes widened slightly before he put up a pout, "Why didn't you call me? I would've liked to say hi to her you jerk!"
Sasuke snorted, "So she could see you half-naked in my house with love bites all over your throat? Yes, that would've gone superbly."
Naruto's hand flew up to his neck, fingers skimming the fresh dark spots, "I would've put on something!" he argued. Though knowing him, he probably wouldn't have thought that far.
The pale shinobi smirked, "I considered it actually. Maybe if she found out I'm fucking you, she'd stop bothering me and bringing me stupid Valentine's Day crap."
Naruto glanced at the gifts, noticing them for the first time before frowning, "But...today's not--"
"Yes." Sasuke assured, "I know. Look at what that crazy woman threw at me." he held out the items so Naruto could see them better.
The young blonde's gaze settled on the heart-box. His jaw dropped, "Sasuke...is that...is that chocolate?"
Sasuke looked at the box, then back to Naruto, "I suppose it is, I haven't--" he gasped when Naruto slung his arms around his neck, crushing the gifts between them and touching their lips, "You're going to share, ne Sasuke?" he whispered.
Sasuke smirked, already feeling the blood rush through his loins, "No dobe, I'm going to burn."
Naruto blinked twice, "Burn?"
Sasuke nodded, "I enjoy setting things on fire, especially things I don't want."
Naruto frowned momentarily before grinning. "C'mon teme." he coaxed, shoving Sasuke back against the hallway wall and trapping him there with his body. He pressed his mouth against his lover's throat, "Don't be such a selfish asshole." was muttered playfully against the skin.
Burn chocolate. Honestly, how stupid did Sasuke think Naruto was? The bastard just wanted to sneak away with it so he could hoard it all for himself.
His hand came down to cup Sasuke's crotch, squeezing it lightly and earning a throaty moan in response, "Share with me." he demanded.
Sasuke tilted his head, allowing the blonde more access as he began to nip and bite at his jawline. "Mmm, dobe." he groaned as the hand on his dick began rubbing him to hardness, and tan fingers slithered beneath his shirt to trace patterns over his stomach and side.
His arms were slackening around the gifts, the only thing keeping them up being Naruto's body mashed against his own. "I don't" he breathed, breath coming quicker as his excitement grew, "I don't even...ah - like sweets."
At those words, Naruto stopped. Completely. He stepped back, letting the gifts drop to the floor as he untangled himself from the other man and stared at him with an impossibly shocked face. "...What?"
Sasuke looked pissed, "Why did you stop?" he asked with annoyance. He reached out for Naruto but he moved away.
"You don't like what Sasuke?"
Sasuke frowned, wishing the blonde would just go back to what he had been doing, "Sweets?"
"You don't like sweets?"
"No dobe, I don't like sweets." he ground out, irked that they were going in circles and wasting precious sex time.
"What the hell is WRONG with you? How do not like sweets?!"
Sasuke shrugged, "The same way you don't like vegetables."
"NO Sasuke!" he shoved and accusing finger at his boyfriend, "This is not NATURAL! Everybody likes sweets!"
"That's not true!" Sasuke yelled in frustration.
Naruto ignored his outburst and bent over, picking up the heart-box, "Sasuke, are you telling me you don't like chocolate?"
Sasuke could literally feel the vein pulsing in his head, "I don't. I don't like anything with sugar."
Naruto gaped at him. Just when he thought it couldn't get any worse. "You don't like sugar?"
Sasuke grit his teeth, "No."
"I LOVE sugar!"
"Yes, that explains a lot dobe. Now that you got that off your chest: Sex. Now."
Naruto shook his head in utter disbelief, "You don't like sugar?" he repeated, dumbfounded.
"No."
"Sweets?"
"No."
"Any?"
"No!"
"At all?"
"NO!"
Naruto lifted an arm and pointed to the door, "Get out."
Sasuke's anger deflated immediately, surprise taking over, "What?"
"Get. Out."
"Get...this is my house!"
Naruto dropped the chocolate and began pushing Sasuke in the direction of the exit.
"Usuratonkachi!"
"Don't you have a mission today?"
"I'm not dressed--"
"DON'T YOU?!"
Sasuke flinched, "Yeah but not until later--"
"GO! And don't come back until tonight!"
Sasuke was incredulous. Where the hell did this little housewife get off kicking Sasuke out of his own house? Sasuke wouldn't stand for it!
And it was then Sasuke realized, that he was already standing outside. Staring at the wood of his shut door.
"...Crap..."
XXXSmutXXX
Several Hours Later...
Sasuke came back home and stood in front of his door, exhausted and pissed beyond all hell.
Since Naruto had kicked him out three HOURS before his mission, Sasuke had spent all morning running and hiding from rabid, jealous fangirls who claimed that Sasuke had betrayed them by accepting Sakura's gifts.
He'd nearly incinerated three of them (since he'd been denied his pyromaniac burning fun by Naruto), and got so tired of the others that he'd actually shouted that he loved Naruto to all their star-struck faces.
They hadn't believed him.
But then Sasuke went into detail about how much he "enjoyed pounding that dobe's tight ass."
The women all took in a collective gasp. And thus, the SasuNaru fanclub was born.
Then when mission time rolled around, Sasuke looked over himself and remembered his Jounin uniform was at home. So off he went to Kakashi's to borrow one when lo' and behold, the silver-haired man opened the door stark nude and demanded that Sasuke stop knocking because he was very busy "making passionate love to his Ruka-chan." Whoever the hell that was.
And all Sasuke could think was...well Sasuke couldn't think really because he was trying to stop the burning in his eyes from seeing his former sensei in all his manly glory. He hadn't even notice that the man had his mask off. Yes, it was that scarring to him.
So then Sasuke left to the Hokage-hag after borrowing a uniform from Shikamaru, and found out that dear old double-D's had already assigned the mission to someone else on account of Sasuke being late.
And when Sasuke tried to explain the Kakashi incident that had permanently stained a portion of his brain, the woman had just waved him off and told him to "get laid and stop imagining naked men."
He bit back the urge to boast that he was already banging the most fuckable ass in all of Konoha (i.e. Naruto), and instead shot back with, "Why in the hell would I 'imagine' a naked Kakashi?" He threw up a little in his mouth.
Tsunade shrugged, "To make up for the fact that you have a small penis."
Shizune came in to find Uchiha Sasuke trying to pummel the Hokage into the ground.
So now here Sasuke was, standing in front of his door after one of the most horribly traumatizing days of his life. Right up there with the murder of his clan and when Orochimaru asked if Sasuke wanted to "play with his Anaconda." He was ready to give Naruto the most painful, angry sex that idiot had ever had - or will ever have - in his life.
Sasuke twisted the knob, cursing when it only went half-way, indicating that it was still locked.
"Kuso." he muttered.
Sasuke bent down and lifted the mat, pulling out a key with a small smile. He brought it up to his face, "It's a good thing I keep one under...the...mat..."
He paused. Stared at the key.
"..."
With a frustrated yell, Sasuke kicked down his door with a chakra filled foot. "NARUTO!" he shouted, tossing the un-used key to some random spot in the house. He made his way to the bedroom, furious and stripping while he walked.
Sasuke stopped in front of his door before throwing it open.
Then stood completely and utterly still.
His room was dark, save for the candles that were scattered about it, shadows flickering with the dancing flames.
His eyes trailed to the bed, where he found a delicious little blonde lying on his side with rose petals scattered around him. Weight propped on his forearm and blue gaze fixed on him. A grin stretched his full lips, "Yes?" he answered.
Sasuke stood speechless as Naruto lifted himself to his knees, rose petals falling away from his body and fluttering to the bed.
He shook his head and walked to the edge of the mattress, black sheets brushing his legs as Naruto wrapped tan arms around his shoulders and pulled him close.
The younger shinobi was smiling wickedly at him, and Sasuke felt the last of his anger die away.
'No! Anger! I demand that you return!' he ordered in his mind. But those damn eyes...Sasuke flicked his gaze to the nightstand, where he spotted two bowls. One held what looked like melted chocolate and another filled to the brim with what Sasuke could only assume was sugar.
Sasuke was suddenly very glad...or very regretful, he wasn't really sure which yet, that he hadn't burned anything. He flinched with surprise when fingers suddenly curled around his sac, and looked down into Naruto's laughing blue eyes.
The Kyuubi vessel leaned up and pressed his lips against Sasuke's, squeezed what he held in his hand. He pulled back slightly, "I thought I might help you develop a sweet tooth. Would you like that Sasuke?" he teased.
Sasuke glanced at the bowl of sugar again and already felt his gums begin to ache. And yet he found himself releasing a breathy "yes", helplessly giving into Naruto's coaxing, like always.
After all, he had him by the balls.
Naruto chuckled and shoved Sasuke back, "Stay right there." he ordered.
And what did Sasuke do? Why, Sasuke obeyed of course. Naruto would probably refuse to continue if he did anything else.
He watched the other boy lay back down and spread his legs, giving Sasuke a clear view of everything. Then Naruto reached over and dipped his hand in the bowl of chocolate, brought it back up, dripping. He trailed his hand down his chest. Circling his nipples before coming down to wrap around himself.
Sasuke felt his cock jump to life as Naruto's hand worked slowly up and down his shaft, coating it with chocolate. Then it stopped suddenly, and the beg for him to continue broke Sasuke's lips apart but he held the words before they could roll off his tongue.
Naruto looked down at him and grinned. His hand traveled further, cupped his balls before falling lower to finger his hole. "You want this asshole?" he asked playfully.
Sasuke couldn't tell if Naruto was insulting him or literally asking him if he wanted it. Which he did. Very badly. But his dick got painfully hard either way and he stepped forward just as Naruto slipped his middle finger into himself, freezing Sasuke in his tracks.
The finger dipped in and out, smearing chocolate all over the hot entrance. Naruto moaned loudly and rolled his hips, arching slightly off the bed, "Ah, Sasuke...yes..." he breathed.
Sasuke's erection twitched. He needed to be surrounded by something, and he preferred Naruto rather than his own hand but Sasuke was getting to the point that he might have to resort to that. He moved forward but Naruto quickly pushed him back with a foot.
The blonde sat up a bit, finger still lodged inside of him, "I told you to stay." he growled.
Sasuke bit the inside of his cheek and again reluctantly stepped back. "For how long?" he asked, and would later tell himself that it was NOT a whine.
Naruto grinned and took his finger out. he turned and scooped both hands into the chocolate. Blue eyes flicked to Sasuke, "Until you can't." he said, then slapped his hands to his chest, rubbing the dark treat over chest and stomach.
Chocolate drops slid down the blonde's sculpted body. And Sasuke couldn't help but feel the little bastards were teasing him, touching what he'd been denied to touch.
The older shinobi licked his lips, only to have them dry right back up when Naruto reached over and grabbed a fistful of sugar, then brought it over his chest as he lay back down.
His smile was maddening as he locked gazes with Sasuke, whose muscles were straining from holding back. Dick pulsing with need and several shades darker that the rest of his pale flesh.
"You say you don't like sweets, teme?" Naruto asked, beginning to drizzle the white powder over his body. He shrugged, watching the substance hit and stick to his chest, "Then I guess you don't want to come over here and have a lick, do you?"
Sasuke didn't respond. And judging from the look on his face (who knew the guy could drool so much?), Naruto didn't think he could.
The Kyuubi container sat up again, drew one knee up and left the other angled on the bed. Rose petals clung to them from the chocolate. His chest was dusted white and Naruto splayed his hand over his knee, then dragged it down his thigh, leaving a sugar trail. Then the same hand went down and curled around his shaft, pumped slowly.
Naruto leaned down to his sugar-coated thigh, above his knee, and gave it a long, leisurely lick, gaze fixed on his lover.
Sasuke's eyes widened.
Naruto's grin grew as his tongue retreated behind his lips, but not before rolling over them to clean any residue he might have left. "Mmmm, some for Naruto..." he purred.
Sasuke's fists clenched as the hand on Naruto's cock swirled its thumb over the leaking head, sweeping up pre-cum and bringing it up to plush lips.
The blonde's eyes glimmered with mischief, "And none for Sasuke." He pressed the thumb against his mouth, about to dip it in when Sasuke could restrain himself no longer and tackled the other male back on the bed, pinning his wrists against the mattress.
Sasuke's head dropped to Naruto's neck, teeth capturing flesh as his tongue swiped along the sweetness that coated the skin.
Naruto yelled and bucked at the treatment, making Sasuke hiss when their hot, throbbing members hooked and pulled against each other as he fell back on the bed.
The older boy bit down harder and lifted Naruto's thighs onto his own, then began grinding him into the bed. Fast, rough and needy.
Naruto cried out. The searing friction of Sasuke's erection pushing down on his own, and the scratchy feel of Sasuke's chest moving up and down against his sugar-coated one drove him wild.
One of Sasuke's hands released Naruto's wrist and fumbled down in a search for his hole. But Naruto bucked and quickly pushed at Sasuke's chest, grinned up at him, "You wanna fuck me now, huh teme?"
Sasuke let out a furious growl. He was fed up with waiting! "Why are you still talking?!"
Naruto arched and pushed his body up a bit, jerking his other wrist free of Sasuke's hold, "You're not doing me" he smirked, "if I'm dirty."
"What?" the pale shinobi asked, not sure he like where Naruto was going with this.
Naruto grabbed a fistful of Sasuke's hair and forced this pink lips to his sugary nipple, "Lick me Sasuke." he demanded.
Sasuke eyes shot to him, surprised.
Naruto's teeth gleamed with his smile, "Lick me clean."
Sasuke gulped and stared down at his lover's chest. He licked his lips. God...it did look so very inviting. But all that sweetness, it had his teeth screaming already.
Naruto rolled his eyes and smiled. He reached back to the bowl of chocolate and scooped some up, smothered Sasuke's left nipple. Then he swiped the hand up his chest and smeared the picked up sugar over the same nub.
Sasuke watched as Naruto leaned up and closed his lips around the sweetened nipple. His excitement spiked.
Blue eyes held Sasuke as Naruto's tongue flicked over the hard nub and swirled around it. He grinned when Sasuke tossed his head back. The blonde bit down and sucked, he tilted his head and flattened his tongue, dragged the muscle, hot and wet, before pulling away. The nipple parting from his mouth cleaned and shiny with saliva.
Sasuke was panting softly and glared at Naruto's smirk.
"Just like that." he said, then laid back down in wait for Sasuke to being.
The raven hesitated. But after a moment of consideration, he slowly leaned down to a dusky nipple and let his lips fall apart. Almost cautiously, Sasuke covered the nub with his mouth and sucked.
He felt Naruto arch and moan beneath him, tangle fingers through his hair. Sasuke didn't even care that the chocolate digits were there. He was too surprised to find his tongue swiping over the captured nipple in a taste for more.
He closed his eyes and wrapped a hand around Naruto's side, sliding the tip of his tongue around the small nub to collect the sugar and the sweet chocolate that coated it.
It was surprisingly...good. Sasuke didn't know why he was enjoying it so much. Maybe the added taste of Naruto himself to the treats spurred the delicious burst of flavor and sweetness in his mouth. Every time he lapped some up, he just dove right in for more.
The older boy pushed his body into Naruto's and widened the circles he made with his tongue.
"Uhn, fuck yeah." the blonde moaned, a writhing mess beneath him.
Sasuke pulled back and dragged his tongue down Naruto's stomach, dipped and swirled into his navel. He smirked at his dobe's mewl and lowered himself to the boy's waiting cock.
It was swollen with need. Covered entirely in chocolate and sugar, the tip wet and leaking still. He chuckled softly, "Seems I'm not the only one who's been suffering here, eh Naruto?"
Naruto groaned loudly and lifted his hips to push against the other's mouth, but they were held back down.
Sasuke smirked, "Don't worry dobe, I won't tease you. You taste too damn good for me to wait." He quickly swiped his tongue up the underside of the cock, earning a startled gasp.
Sasuke's smirk grew and he closed his lips around the erection, going down slowly and rolling his tongue over every spot of sugar-coated skin he could touch. He felt the fingers tighten in his hair when he came back up, flattening his tongue and shoving the tip into the slit of the head.
"Shit!" Naruto screamed, fighting against the other's hold in an attempt to fuck his mouth.
Sasuke grinned around the dick before plunging down and rising back up. His head began bobbing. Up and down, over and over, sure to keep his tongue flat on the bottom as he moved. One of his hands went up to Naruto's chest, pushed a thumb against a nipple and rubbed it harshly.
Naruto cried out again and spread his legs as far as he could, "Kami Sasuke! Fuck me now!" he begged.
Sasuke smiled and let go of the erection. He went lower and thrust his tongue into Naruto's hole, then pulled out and circled it with the tip.
The blonde shuddered and roughly yanked at Sasuke by his hair, "Now Sasuke!"
Sasuke got up on his knees and crawled up Naruto's body. Hovering over him, Sasuke reached to the bowl of chocolate and scooped up a handful, then hastily brought it back to slap it over Naruto's hole. Then, without warning, he shoved his middle finger up the blonde's ass, striking his prostate.
Naruto jumped and released a guttural moan.
"What was that dobe?" Sasuke asked cruelly, insistently pressing his finger and rubbing against the small bundle of nerves while adding another.
Tears collected at the corners of Naruto's eyes. It felt so good. "God Sasuke--"
"Are you clean enough to be fucked?" Sasuke taunted, throwing the blonde's words back at him, fingers still working.
Naruto nodded quickly, "Fuck Sasuke please!"
Sasuke smirked and pulled his fingers out. Then with one swift thrust, buried himself inside Naruto.
They both moaned loudly. The initial push only sent a dull ache up Naruto's spine, since he was mostly used to it.
Sasuke began moving in and out, lacing both their hands on either side of Naruto's head as he did.
Naruto threw his head back, allowing Sasuke to lick a trail up his throat and moaning constantly as his prostrate was hit dead-on.
They panted heavily, Sasuke's hips forcing Naruto's back with each thrust.
Naruto arched up, trying to put friction between his throbbing cock and Sasuke's taut stomach. "Nhn, Sas...yes yes." he groaned.
Sasuke joined him, sound pushed out by the tight heat swallowing him and the rose petals that tickled and stuck to their sweating bodies. Naruto's chocolate-sugar chest scraped along his. The sensations had him screaming through a bite on Naruto's bottom lip when he came, exploding within the boy.
Naruto hissed at the abuse on his lip and cursed loudly when he sprayed their torsos, right after Sasuke.
Sasuke fell on top of the blonde and pushed his head to the side with his cheek, so he could lap at Naruto's neck and drop kisses on it.
Naruto was breathing softly. The kisses on his throat brought a smile to his face, "How do you feel about sweets now?" he teased.
Sasuke paused before smirking against the skin beneath his lips, "Hn, they're alright." he drawled.
He came up to find Naruto giving him and incredulous look, which he chuckled at and leaned down to kiss him deeply.
Naruto's anger melted from the contact. Besides, he knew the jerk was just being...well a jerk, anyway. "How about we get cleaned up?" he asked, moving to get up even though Sasuke was still inside him.
But he was shoved back on the bed, a smiling raven looming over him.
"My pleasure." Sasuke said with a smirk.
XXXSmutXXX
"They did WHAT with my gifts?!" Sakura yelled.
The Sasuke-turned-SasuNaru-fangirl nodded quickly and handed her a tape, "Oh yeah it's all on here." she said. "So you should stop harass...I mean, you should give up on him...Or actually...bring them more gifts!"
Sakura grabbed the tape and slammed the door, "LIAR!" she screamed, "My precious Sasuke-kun would NEVER use MY gifts that way! My precious Sasuke-kun is not gay!"
She popped in the tape and watched it.
Less than five minutes later. Sakura was passed out on the floor from blood loss through the nose. And since she was a lonely whore and no one lived with her:
She died.
The whole village celebrated. Sasuke finally accepted that he liked sweets and engaged in what he promptly named "sugar sex with Naruto" (yes, the whole thing) quite often. And the SasuNaru fandom was there to record every minute of it.
The End
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unfortunately, those recordings are illegal in over 20 countries XD
I hope you all enjoyed this thoroughly, and maybe even got a laugh or two out of it. when I finished it, I gave it to my friend Megan to read and when she finished I was like, "Sweet enough for you?"
she grinned slowly at me, "I feel the diabetes coming on."
I laughed.
please review! more one-shots to come!
P.S: To answer those asking about why "Beastly Callings" isn't on the poll, it's because that story is a collaboration with my friend Kiki, so we plan it out together. And I have to be in a certain...er...crack mood to write it, like I was with this story. I can't just pull a chapter out of my ass and make it funny...wait, yes I can, but still, trust me, BC has special writing circumstances and is not like my other stories (obviously). So that's why n.n