Author's Note: Love writing these. Hopefully you enjoy reading them. 8D! I don't own House.
1. Do not challenge House to a leg race.
2. Do not glue hair on Foreman's head.
3. Do not glue feathers to Wilson's labcoat.
4. Do not force Cuddy to come to work without a shirt.
5. Do not try to prove House wrong.
6. Do not depend on the hospital's security.
7. Do not use House's cane as a baseball bat.
8. Do not lock Thirteen in a closet full of black cats.
9. Do not cover Lucas in Mucas.
10. Do not allow Chase to tell "Your Mama" jokes.
11. Do not write on House's whiteboard.
12. Do not use the elevator like an amusement park ride.
13. Do not drive House's motorcycle into the hospital.
14. Do not chase the purple elephant.
15. Do not play hide and seek in the hospital.
16. Do not turn off all the lights in the hospital.
17. Do not pants Kutner.
18. Do not tell Taub to perform plastic surgery on himself.
19. Do not challenge House to karaoke.
20. Do not stick a bunch of chewed up gum in Stacy's hair.
21. Do not poke the bear.
22. Do not walk into the hospital dress as a zombie.
23. Do not dance like a robot in House's office.
24. Do not allow a bunch of people with cameras into Cuddy's office.
25. Do not surf down the stairs.
26. Do not run out of the hospital screaming "freedom".
27. Do not bleach House's cane.
28. Do not lick the white board.
29. Do not release the kraken
30. It's never Lupus!
31. Do not feed the fangirls.
32. Do not egg House's house.
33. Do not break the glass walls.
34. Do not fill Kutner's house with open umbrellas.
35. Do not set Cuddy's hair on fire.
36. Do not lock House in the clinic.
37. Do not force House to follow the rules.
38. Do not dye House's hair pink.
39. Do not give Wilson a manicure whilst he is asleep.
40. Do not blast heavy metal music in the hospital.
41. Do not walk up to House and tell him you love him.
42. Do not draw on Chase's face.
43. Do not flood the hospital with soda.
44. Do not replace Cuddy with a coat hanger.
45. Do not perform a dangerous stunt in front of Cameron.
46. Do not fill House's office with teddy bears.
47. Do not put stickers in all the medical books.
48. Do not do something bad and then blame it on House.
49. Do not try to live in the elevator.
50. Do not call Cameron, Cuddy, or Thirteen fat.
51. Do not roll three doubles.
52. Do not transport House, Cuddy, Wilson, and the teams into a video game.
53. Go to jail. Go directly to jail. Do not pass Go. Do not collect 200 dollars.
54. Do not force House into a Santa Clause costume.
55. Do not fill Wilson's closet with lollipops.
56. Everybody lies.
57. Respect the number nine.
58. Do not buy a dog for House.
59. Do not jump out of Kutner's closet claiming you're the boogie man.
60. Do not street race using Wilson's Volvo.
61. Do not dress up as a sheriff and pretend you're in a western movie.
62. Do not run into the operation room screaming.
63. Do not leave Twitter near water.
64. Do kick Volger in the ass.
65. Do not soak Cuddy with a water gun.
66. Do not walk into House's office dressed up as death.
67. Love, love is a verb.
68. Do buy plenty of fangirl repellent.
69. Do not cover yourself with cranberry juice and then pretend you're hurt.
70. Do not expect House to care.
71. Do not stick a skunk in Wilson's office.
72. Do not release roaches all over the hospital.
73. Do not walk backwards.
74. Do fall asleep on the job.
75. And the winner is...
76. ...always Gregory House!
Author's Note: Was it entertaining?