Haldir Visits Ferdninand Creek

Disclaimer: I do NOT own LOTR. They belong to Mr. Tolkien However, should a blue fighter fish swim through this story, remember his name is also Haldir and I DO own him and Crystal.

AU ALERT: Haldir o Lorien is alive, well and nowhere near Helm's Deep. Please, no flames as this is my

LOTR fanfic debut.

Dedication: To Breann Voth a close friend 2/5/83 - 12/7/02 (homicide) my beta reader Ripper101 and my teacher Ferdinand!

Crystal's POV

I was having a nice soak in the tub, on the very first Friday of summer vacation. It may come as a surprise to many, but I was enjoying this chance to simply lie back and relax. School can be just so darned hectic! Always playing a role, always acting a part and during the school year, I wasn't even one of the more popular girls.

But I was on the cheerleading squad over the very vocal objections from the squad captain, but anyway- back to telling about my soak.

My mom had just peeked into the bathroom to tell me that she and Dad were leaving for Germany. Yeah, they were leaving on yet another drug case. I never bother to ask for details because they just won't tell me.

My dad explained it the only time I ever asked- "The less you know the better off you'll be if you're kidnapped, sweet thing. After about half an hour, I was just getting out of the tub when there was this huge flash of light; and there he was- drowning in my bath. Now, No Doubt (the band) may sing about loving to wash in someone else's bath water, but this was ridiculous! I don't, as a rule, like people falling into my bathtub.

I flipped over whoever it was- not wanting them to drown- when I saw what looked to me like a sheathed knife in the person's belt. Add that to an ensemble of clothes that no one in their right minds would ever wear in public any more and I was pulling him out of the water with shaking hands to get a better look. It was, it was! It was Haldir o Lorien, who was my favourite Lord of the Rings character! I considerately let him stay unconscious and half-drowned as I changed and then picked- okay more like dragged- an unconscious Haldir out of the bathroom and into the living room.

I laid him out on the carpet. He was soaking and covered in bloodstains. Wrestling with my sense of moral right and wrong for a while, I took his clothes off and took them downstairs to the laundry room to soak them in some cold water. Coming back up the stairs, I heard not one, but two of those little old ladies who were constantly spying on the house. Maybe it's a Neighbourhood Watch thing, but it's my opinion they think I'm dealing drugs.

And sweet old Beth Magrath from across the street just happened to peek through the window from an upstairs window only to yell downstairs, "Well, Shirley, look here; Crystal's parents are hardly even gone a few hours, and she already has a young man over!

I suppose the other lady was one of Beth's friends. I couldn't hear what the other lady said in reply but I bet it was something along the same lines. They're both sweet old things, but they watch way too much television.

My silent reverie on the world of little old ladies was disturbed for all time when I heard Haldir stirring. This, I promised myself, might not be a very good thing. I opened the door, to find Haldir sitting on the couch in the clothes that I had left out for him. Well he was wearing the jeans anyway. I took one look at him and almost said, Mmm hmm!

If you suggest going upstairs, I am oh, so game! And wouldn't you know it, the phone rang. Do you know it's true, that elves move faster than any human? Haldir had grabbed the phone a full second before I could reach it. Luckily it wasn't my parents; just my friend Chelsea, who proceeded to say, "Hey, Crysti?" in a voice so loud I could hear it two steps away.

Luckily it wasn't my parents; just my friend Chelsea, who proceeded to say, "Hey, Crysti?" in a voice so loud I could hear it two steps away.

Haldir looked puzzled for a moment and stared at the phone, but then smiled at me and shrugged. "Suilaid Mae Govennen," the bastard said silkily, knowing full well that I wanted him to hand the phone over before he damaged my reputation by saying something he shouldn't have. Congratulations to him, he achieved with spectacular effect what I had never wanted to happen.

I wrestled back my telephone (yeah, right!) and glared at him. Chelsea thought it was a barrel of laughs. She kept dropping little unsubtle hints like, "Girl, what's going on? Who was that and is he hot?" I replied in what I still insist was a pretty convincing tone of innocence. But as every girl knows, one doesn't sit across from a half-naked Galadhrim and not want to boast about it.

So it wasn't all that great a piece of acting. She replied, "Come on, Crystal. If I put down the phone unsatisfied, you know that I'm just going to come over to see for myself, don't you? Now spill!" I gave up a little. " Oh, him, you mean? Nobody important." After I hung up with Chelsea, I looked up to the visitor on the couch, and suddenly remembered the not so happy vagueness of what was going on.

Since Haldir seemed about to fall off the couch in order to get some sleep, I helped him gently to the floor for just a second while I unfolded the hide-a-bed. Ah! God bless them, every hide-a-bed in the world! While I opened it, Haldir just sighed and shut his eyes. It would have felt a lot better to swear at him to get roundly off his sleeping arse and come help me, but he murmured, "Meleth, are you near?"

I just had to smile to myself. "I'm just getting my pyjamas, and I'll be right back, okay?" Leave a gorgeous elf- never mind that he is fictional and popped out of nowhere- in a bed alone when he clearly wants my company? How could I be so cruel! He smiled at me when I returned and pulled me close to him.

Author's Note: the ONLY time the Eldarin( Elves) ever sleep with their eyes closed is due to injury/sickness. How many know that