Emotion Less

~Prologue~

Kiss. No feeling. Another kiss. Nope, still none. Kiss. NONE! Damn! Kiss. Wait, what was that? Kiss, tongue, okay. Feel, let go. Relax. Feel…what is that? Love. That's it. Love. Do I want to make love? Yes, yes I do.

"Let's have sex Eric. I love you and you love me. I want to try with you. I never have."

"No, not now."

He continued to kiss my lips, my neck, and my shoulders hungrily, like an animal, until I pulled him down to the floor of the janitorial closet. As we landed on our knees, I pulled myself on my back, forcing him to come with me. His lips then found their way to my neck while I panted heavily. His hands moved to feel up my breasts, then swiftly made their way down my pants only to turn me on more than I already was. My hands did the same as his, except when I got to his pants he said, "stop," grabbed some masking tape and taped my hands behind my back, then went back to feeling me up, but nothing more.

That's when my anger lashed out from the cover called my sanity. I somehow ripped the masking tape from my wrists and pulled his expert hands from my pants and boobs. "If you said no, then why are you feeling me up!?"

"Because we're not doing more than this and you cant touch me. Believe me, its more fun that way, but I guess you don't wanna do it like that. It's not my fault. It's my mother's teachings. We had a nice little time when my dad wasn't home and still do."

"Well your mother is a sick, sick woman and so are you but I still love you. Get off me Eric. I need to get out of here. Love you. Don't touch me! And if you EVER do that with your mother again i WILL kill you too. Your mine. Only mine."

I picked up a knife, a sharp one I made sure. Then I flung open the door to reveal an empty school, everyone in class, and ran to my car. I got in and drove to Eric's house. It was empty. I had no one to murder as I had planned to kill his mother for teaching him ho to make everything "feel good". Now, there is no sex and no kill. I guess tomorrow I will just have to make up for today. Eric's sex (if he wants to or not), his mother, and my sister………………………….

A week later…

My mom is sending me to a damn shrink now that she found my plan book (uniquely hidden under a "Twilight" cover on the front and a "Maximum Ride" cover on the back), which held the plans for Eric's mother and my sister. Now I have no kills, and no plans, but i did get Eric's unwilling lovemaking sex and it was MAGICAL. But other than that, my life is just great.

~Chapter One~

"Lacey," said Albertson, a.k.a known as my freak of a shrink. The thing that really disturbed me though is that he said this with compassion, like he really did care what I did and what happened to me. This one is good, isn't he," Lacey? Hello? Are you there?" he waved his hand in front of my face and then snapped his fingers when I didn't respond. He tried to get my attention, but I wouldn't cave. Well. Maybe I should just give him what he wants and place what he wants at his feet, as if he's an almighty god. NO. I WILL NOT. I'm not giving in. No way. Keep your eyes glassy and your face blank. Do not give in. DO YOU HEAR ME BRAIN! DO NOT GIVE IN! YOU TOO FACE. DO NOT GIVE IN!! He's not worth it. Not even close.

"Lacey,, I believe that it is in your best interest that you snap out of this right now and focus. We need to talk. More importantly, you need to talk. Put what ever is pent up inside on the table. There are others like you. I know how to help you. Please. Allow me access into your own little world."

That loon of a shrink thinks he knows me? Ha. Know one truly knows me. Not unless they're like me. Dying to kill. Dying to have power. Just wanting to feel. Wanting to feel what it feels like to feel to be happy, sad, in control, love, and most of all, power.

The shrink, Dr. Albertson, is always like this. With his more-than-a-beer-belly appearance and thinning grayish auburn hair, he looked more like someone who should play Santa Clause at Christmas of a historian at some moldy museum than a psychiatrist. His glasses really didn't help his overall look. Thick black frames held in some very thick lenses. Kinda like Drew Carey's. today he wore khaki high waters with what looked to have a ketchup stain on them. He had some smiley face suspenders on which, truth by told, made him look idiotic. I hope he doesn't wear those to the super market or maybe he just wore those to make himself look like loon. His shirt was worse though. It was puke green with gray, white, and black trout print all over it. And just to top that off, his shirt was flannel, yes, flannel.

"Hey. Dude. Steve. Can I call you steve?" I said soundnig like know it all from the hood.

"ummmmm…"

"O.K. Sweet," I stated like a real skater dude. This is kinda fun, "Since we're on a first name basis now, I can ask you this, who put your outfit together? A blind guy? I mean no offense to the blind but really! Trout, high waters, and smiley faces? Can we say like puke?" I started to sound like a cheerleader. Wait, I am one! Like, OMG! What a coincidink! (sarcasm friends. Get used to it. But I really am a cheerleader.)