If I could sum up my life in three words I would have to choose "at its end". Why? Well, unless this fall ends up like one of those dreams where you fall and hit the ground, are perfectly fine, and say in your dream "Well, now what?" then you get up and waltz off, I'm pretty positive I'm going to die.

I look down at the ground from eight stories up, more than enough to kill my small, frail body from the roof the Ouran Industries HQ. His car's not there. Before I jump, I walk on the flat roof to the stair well and look down for three things, to see if my prince has come to rescue me from this dragon.He's not here... it's all my fault. He hates me...he would rather see me dead than al-.I slap myself. "What are you talking about Aiko? Tamaki loves you very much, that's why he gave you the name 'little loved one'." I tell myself.

My real name is Juli Hernandez. Tamaki said that my name didn't suit my character and that my name should be 'little loved one' instead because I'm tiny and everyone loves to be around me. Including Tamaki.

Just to make sure my Prince isn't here searching for me, I walk downstairs checking all 100 floors and all rooms (there are 45 rooms in each floor) searching for Tamaki. While I'm searching for him, running helter-skelter, people in the workplace are staring at me and mumbling to each other "Shouldn't she be at school?"

When I'm done, I ride the elevator four times, two up and two down. Just to make sure that he isn't here. Of course he wouldn't be here, even if he did take it seriously..well, it's only cooking class...

When I'm done with my pre-suicidal floor-room-elevator ritual, I do the smart thing and totally non idiotic looking thing and walk up to the front desk in the foyer and ask the nice lady that is sitting at it. Her name is Chiyo Asuhina, she's a middle-aged woman and she has long grey hair with white self dyed highlights that is always in a tight bun with a few strands out to frame the right side of her face.

Tamaki and i call her "Marshirato Chiyo" because her first name is Chiyo, and she's old and when you die, what does your body do? Ok restate the question... In dramatic movies, when someone is dying what does the dying person normally say? "Rasputin...I'm cold..." Yea I think you get the point.. Anywho, I ask her if she's seen Tamaki. I stand there, talking to the sweet old woman while she's listening intently. when I'm talking to her, I describe the tall, blonde, Japanese-French man with big, gorgeous eyes that shone like big, beautiful, translucent crystals, my prince; Tamaki Suoh. "I'm sorry, He's not been here all day...But his daddy's been here bunches of times! He works here you know!" Said Chiyo con mucho esparanza to help me on my quest. "And shouldn't you be in school?" asks the eighty-nine year old secretary. Oh crap, she's onto me...crap she's suspicious of me...what to do...ahhhh...hmmmm...Ah-Ha! I GOT IT! "I'm in study hall." I say, which isn't a really big lie, because I really was in study hall, and the teacher doesn't really care what I do necessarily. She treats me the best out of all 38 boys 1 "boy" and me. She sent me to the store to get some vinegar and baking soda for the middle schoolers, uggh, middle schoolers! "Ok…" she says slyly, "I'll let you go this time..but next time…not likely!" Chiyo finishes. "There's not going to be a next time" I add under my breath. "What?" Chiyo asks, "There's not going to be enough time" I say louder thank god for poor hearing."For what?" Chiyo asks. "To get back to school before the next class starts" I lie, which was partially true. "Well, do you need a ride?" she asked, but I politely said "No, I'm fine, thank you though!." and walk to the staircase.

I walk off brushing my long natural black sleek scenemo hair putting a purple pair of ear buds blaring 'Me gustas Tú' and after that I'm blaring 'Coma La Flor' even louder as I melt to tears in the elevator. I touch up my makeup, then exit the elevator crying even more and turn 'La Vida Es Un Carnival' on full blast, slip on my checkered sweat band, black skinny jeans, black and white off the shoulder t-shirt, and black and blue striped chucks. And neatly fold my uniform and crinoline and school shoes beside me. After that, I just sit on the roof listening to music from my Hispanic-Tejano heritage crying. And after every song, I cry more, and more than the last, thinking that it would have been better if I would have stayed in Mexico. "Lo siento Tamaki. LO SIENTOOOOO!" I scream crying, on the rooftop, and move my knees towards my body and hugging them against the little box that leads to the stairwell y elevator.

I turn off my iPod and my ears are ringing. I wait a few minutes to calm down. Then, I start thinking I can't believe I am actually considering doing this... Think of all the lives that would be affected...after that I start to cry and I quietly sing to myself a couple lullabies that my mother used to sing to me to get me to sleep when she was alive, when I lived in Mexico.

~ Patito patito color de café,

si tú no me quieres entonces porqué?

Ya no me presumas que al cabo yo sé

que tú eres un patito color de café.

Me dijo que sí y luego que no,

era una patita como todas lo son

La pata voló y el pato también

y nunca jamás a los dos encontré.

Pin pon es un muñeco muy guapo de cartón,

se lava sus manitas con agua y con jabón.

Se peina con un peine muy duro de marfil

y aunque se dé estirones no llora ni hace así

Cuando come la sopa no ensucia el delantal

y come con cuidado como un buen colegial.

Apenas las estrellas empiezan a salir.

Pin Pon se va a la cama y se acuesta a dormer

Pin Pon dame la mano con un fuerte apretón,

que quiero ser tu amigo Pin Pon, Pin Pon, Pin Pon.

…After I finish with that, I take out my notebook, and I draw. I draw all of my Best Friends, Amber, Sarah, Emilia, Amalia, the Host Club, Luna, Naya, mi gatitos (Mi Gatitos was a band that Amber, Sarah, Emilia, Amalia, Tamaki, Luna, Naya, and i created and preformed dance rock, and in a classical ensemble together) and Devôn, and Juan. I draw all of the good times the places, even exactly what we said and did. It was nothing hort of a major tearjerker. I drew when we all went on a vacation to Spain and drew a café scene. I drew pictures of us playing in Amber, Devôn, Luna and my ensemble of flute, clarinet, Guitar, and Ocarina.

I guess the tears that were drowning my mind called for reinforcements. It starts to rain. I was exhausted, I wanted to sleep, but I knew that I couldn't go back to school, let alone go home. I turned on my iPod to our song, Lullaby For a Stormy Night by Vienna Teng on loop, only at a volume not-as-harsh as the last time my iPod was on. I pull out my deep purple and black checked umbrella and I fall asleep with tears running off my cheeks. Then I think, if my father knew what I was and is going to do, then he would most definitely call the Cucuy on my behalf...

As I lie on the cold, wet,hard roof I slowly start to dream.. It's a little hard to fall asleep because of the rain pattering on my face, then I move my purse over my eyes and slowly fall asleep.. Then I started to dream.. and little did I know that I was about to dream the most painful dream yet..

(Hope you enjoyed. it may not make sénce right just yet, but next chapter ill introduce tama-chan's point of view. stay tuned, message me if you have questions, ideas, recommendations, or requests for any other fanfics. Not all of them will start out like this, i promise! i just had this...mmmmm... idea for this fanfic for a while- since last December actually, and i just wanted to publish it on here since then.)