Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter.
Author's Note: This is a oneshot that just popped into my head and ended becoming a lot longer than I originally intended, i.e. multiple chapters... oh well, enjoy! The whole thing is written, so I'll get the other chapters up soon!
Present Day...
I am so screwed.
Teddy Lupin groaned, his head crashing into his hands. At twenty-six, he knew he should have the maturity to handle such a situation. At twenty-six, he was simply a kid in a grown man's body. At twenty-six, Teddy felt his life was over.
"What am I supposed to do?" he mumbled. "I can't... I just can't!"
He flopped back on the bed. Twenty-four hours ago, his worst problem was the Ministry paperwork piling on his desk. Harry's disapproving stare as he passed by the young Auror's office seemed like a lifetime ago.
Teddy groaned again at the thought of his godfather. Harry was going to kill him.
"What the hell am I supposed to do?" Teddy cried.
"How about talking to me?"
Teddy propped himself up on his elbows to get a better view of the figure standing at his bedroom door. Her red hair cascaded past her thin shoulders and her bright brown eyes betrayed an intelligence far beyond her years. Teddy was sure he his heart stopped beating at the sight of Lily Potter.
"This involves me too, Teddy," Lily said as she swept to the foot of the bed. She stood over the young man, surveying him. "You must be worried; you're brunette."
Teddy's face scrunched in a moment of confusion, then his brown eyes flicked up to the tips of his bangs. His hair was indeed natural brown, his natural hair color, the same color as his father's. Normally, Teddy would have indulged Lily and offered her a variety of hair color options before settling on turquoise, a little game they had played since she was a baby.
She's a baby no more, Teddy thought. He sighed, leaving his hair to do as it wished, and flopped back on the bed again. "What are we going to do, Lily?"
"Well, James will be godfather, and Mum and Rose can throw the babyshower. I know Grandmum Weasley will want to be involved, but at her age it's best if she takes it easy. And Dad and Albus and Uncle Ron can help paint the nursery and..." Lily stopped and smirked at the incredulous look on Teddy's face. She whacked him on the leg. "I'm kidding! I need to lighten the mood. You're freaking out on me and that terrifies me."
Guilt slammed into Teddy like a crashing ocean wave. Here he was, worried about how impending fatherhood would screw up his life when Lily was the one carrying their child. He had no idea how she was feeling about the situation, but one look into her eyes revealed all. Teddy knew Lily well enough to note the flicker of fear in her dark orbs. He had to keep collected, for Lily's sake.
"Oh, Lily," Teddy breathed, sitting up and pulling her into his lap. He stroked her hair as she settled into his chest. "I'm sorry. I'm just... I don't know what to think about all this."
"I know. I'm scared too," Lily whispered. "I mean, I'm still in school Teddy! Yeah, I'll have graduated by the time the baby's born, but with all the crap that goes down in the halls of Hogwarts, not to mention the dangerous creatures, potions, and spells we study... that's no place for a pregnant teenager. And with everything that's been going on the past few years..."
Teddy hugged Lily tighter and sighed. "Don't worry about them, they won't bother us."
"You're an Auror, Teddy, they always bother you. It's what Dark Wizards do."
"You think my career will endanger our child? Have you met your father?"
Lily laughed. Teddy grinned at the sound, silky and light. Then Lily sobered. "That's not what I meant. I'm not worried about our baby being a target. I'm worried about our child growing up without it's father. You and Dad have nearly been killed so many times just doing your jobs. What if one day the enemy succeeds?"
At this, Teddy twisted Lily around so she could look at him. He took her face in his hands. "Lily, I want you listen to me. That will never happen. I won't let our child..." Teddy paused, choking back a sob. "I won't let history repeat itself. I won't let our child end up like me."
Tears prickled in Lily's eyes as she flung herself on top of Teddy. "I love you, Teddy. If it was going to be anyone, I'm glad it was you."
Teddy gently kissed the woman in his arms. He sighed. "It's just hard sometimes. I mean, I love Harry, don't get me wrong. But he's..."
"Not your dad," Lily finished. She pulled away slightly for a better vantage point. "He doesn't want to be your dad. He respects your father too much for you to ever call him anything but 'Harry.' He may love you as a son, he may have raised you, but he would never do anything to dishonor your father's memory."
Teddy chuckled. "He told me the same growing up. That's one of the things I've always admired about him. He's fiercely loyal to people he cares about."
They sat in silence for a moment, Teddy unsure of where the conversation was headed, Lily perfectly at ease with her current position and not in any hurry to move. Eventually Teddy glanced at the clock on his nightstand. Six- thirty.
"Come on, we'd better go." He grasped Lily by the arms and lifted her off his lap.
Lily sniffled. "I don't know if I can do this."
"It's now or never. I just hope your dad is merciful."
Lily's face remained a pained mask as she slid off the bed and headed to the bathroom for a quick once over of her appearance. While Teddy waited, he couldn't help but think back on how this all started...
Summer before Lily's fifth year...
"Teddy!"
Teddy shifted in his sleep, burying his face deeper into the pillow. If he ignored her maybe she'd go away.
"Teddy Remus Lupin!"
Damn.Teddy rolled over and blinked at the sunlight streaming in from the bedroom window. Victoire must have opened it when she got up.
They were like night and day, Teddy and Victoire. She loved bright colors and the pale glow of an early morning sun on her creamy skin; Teddy preferred starlight and the cover of darkness, a time when he didn't have to see people staring at him with eyes of false sympathy or watch them whisper amongst themselves about "the poor orphan."
"Are chu getting up? Chu vill be late for vork!" Victoire's thick accent floated from the other side of their apartment. Though fluent in both English and French, she'd adopted part of her mother's accent and tried desperately to rid herself of it in public. In private, however, Victoire just let the words flow.
Teddy really hated that. He never understood the point of trying to make others like you if you weren't being you. He scratched his turquoise covered head, a perfect example of his point. He changed appearances constantly, namely his hair color, and could frankly care less if the more conservative crowd disapproved. He'd only recently got Victoire to stop harassing him about looking "normal" when they went out.
He dressed quickly and sauntered to the kitchen. It smelled delicious, but foreign. The aroma was recognizable and tantalizing. If he could just put his finger on it...
Teddy stopped dead in his tracks. Victoire had made pancakes. She only made pancakes when she wanted to "talk."
Victoire caught sight of her boyfriend and smiled, wisps of blond curls peeking out from a lazy ponytail. As a Healer, putting up one's hair was mandatory. She beckoned Teddy to the table, where he reluctantly took a seat.
When Teddy didn't grab for the platter of pancakes, Victoire's smile faded. "Are chu not 'ungry?"
"Starving, but I'd rather get this over with first. What's the problem this time, Victoire?"
The young woman rolled her eyes and stuffed more books in her bookbag. She had recently passed her examinations but had decided to continue with her studies and take up a specialization. She just hadn't chosen one yet, and so Victoire found herself hitting the books again, taking any class that sounded remotely interesting until she found what suited her.
"De chillren are back from 'ogwarts," she said casually.
"Yes, I know, I was at the train station with Harry and Ginny yesterday." Teddy looked at Victoire, wondering where this was all going.
"De are hafing a party for James tonight, for his graduacion." Victoire zipped her bag and looked hard at Teddy. "Are chu going?"
Teddy raised an eyebrow. "Of course I'm going. James is like a brother to me. Hell, he is my brother."
Victoire cocked her head. "And chu think of Albus and Lily as chur brother and sister, too, oui?"
"Absolutely," Teddy said quickly. Too quickly, he realized. Victoire's eyes narrowed but she didn't say anything. She glanced at her watch, grabbed her bag, and Flooed to St. Mungo's.
So much for a goodbye kiss.Teddy leaned back in his chair, running a hand through his hair, which had turned bright red as soon as Victoire left. She was suspicious, that much was clear. Part of Teddy wanted to vehemently deny it, accuse her of imagining things, but he knew it was a lie. Victoire had been at King's Cross yesterday too, waiting to welcome home her cousins and younger siblings. She would have seen him embrace James as a brother, seen him ruffle Albus' already untidy hair, seen him kiss Lily's temple and smother her in a hug, and seen him never let go of the youngest Potter.
Teddy mentally smacked himself. He thought he was playing it cool. He and Lily had always been close; she often referred to him as her favorite brother. The whole Weasley clan knew Teddy had been wrapped around the redhead's finger from the day she was born. He could only hope his actions yesterday had appeared no different than usual.
But if Victoire saw something, there was always the possibility that someone else noticed as well.
Victoire and Teddy got home from work around the same time. She still wasn't talking to him. Teddy let her have her space as they changed for the party. He'd never been on the wrong end of one of her hexes before and he wasn't looking to be in that position anytime soon, so he kept his mouth shut and let her do as she pleased.
They Apparated separately to the Burrow. Dominique automatically spied her sister and pulled Victoire into the throng, leaving Teddy alone on the stoop. He forced himself to put one foot in front of the other instead of turning around and fleeing to the garden.
"You look thrilled to be here," Albus said. He handed Teddy a cup of punch. "Don't worry, Fred spiked it with Firewhiskey. Just don't tell Mum or Grandmum Weasley."
Teddy laughed for the first time that day and graciously accepted the proffered drink. He glanced around the living room. Not only was the entire extended Weasley family packed into the house, but several of James' classmates had been invited too, as well as the rather large number of friends of the family, including the Longbottoms, the Scamanders, and, Teddy was surprised to see, the Malfoys.
Albus followed Teddy's gaze. "Oh, you can thank Rose for that. She finally convinced Uncle Ron to be within thirty meters of Draco Malfoy."
"At least he's behaving himself. Ron, I mean," Teddy said, acknowledging Albus' curious face.
"Oh, yeah. I'm sure Aunt Hermione threatened to curse him if he wasn't at least civil to the Malfoys. The only reason he's nice to Scorpious is because Aunt Hermione actually did hex him when Rose brought Scorpious home over Christmas break third year," Albus laughed.
Teddy watched Scorpious and Draco talking. His eyes grew wide when the two embraced. "I thought Draco disowned Scorpious when he was sorted into Gryffindor."
"Wait, you don't know?" Albus looked at Teddy oddly.
Teddy shrugged. "Know what? Last I heard, your dad took him in because he had no place else to go."
"Seriously, you don't know? They're your family and you don't know?"
"Just because we share biology does not make them my family," Teddy snapped. He saw Albus recoil and he softened. "Sorry, Al, but it's true. You guys are more my family than they ever will be."
Albus nodded in understanding. "Anyway, your grandmother is the reason Scorpious is living with his parents again. Andromeda wouldn't let Draco alone until they reconciled. She probably would have gone through Narcissa, but since Lucius' death she's not the same, so Andromeda took it upon herself to put the family back together."
"Didn't know the Malfoys were Humpty-Dumpty," Teddy chuckled.
A head of bushy red hair obscured his view of the Malfoys. Rose Weasley shoved a finger into Teddy's chest, pushing him backwards several inches.
"Rose! What the hell?" Albus demanded.
"Alright, Lupin, what did you do?" Rose's eyes flashed dangerously and Teddy voluntarily moved back another couple of inches.
"What are you talking about?" Teddy asked shakily. Did she suspect? He thought she was on the other side of the platform. She couldn't have seen. Could she? Even if she did, she knew how close he and Lily were. She'd never question their relationship, right?
"What is up with you and Victoire? She's in the kitchen crying!"
If Teddy hadn't felt like he was staring down the barrel of a gun (which he'd done the other day, actually. Whoever decided to let Wizards into Muggle gun shops seriously needed to be knocked upside the head), he would have laughed at his own ridiculousness. Instead, he gulped his worry and glanced towards the kitchen. "She is?"
"Yes! She's been in there ever since you two arrived!" Rose's face was red, her chest heaving with every breath. "She's not saying anything, just a bunch of incoherent nonsense. But whatever it is, it's your fault. She keeps muttering some rather nasty adjectives for you."
"Thought you said it was incoherent nonsense?" Albus smirked.
"Shut up you!" Rose snarled. Now Albus was retreating into the wall. Teddy had to stifle a laugh. Rose turned back on her original prey. "This better be some petty argument over window curtains or so help me I will not let you rest in peace!"
With that, Rose spun on her heel and stalked back into the kitchen.
"Damn, your cousin is scary. I would have expected Dominique or Louis or even Bill to blow up at me, but never Rose."
Albus shrugged. "We're a tight family. You mess with one of us, you mess with all of us."
Teddy didn't know he could feel worse than he already dead, but as the words fell out of the seventeen-year-old's mouth, Teddy realized just how screwed he was if he didn't get hold of himself and fast.
Excusing himself from Albus, Teddy dashed outside to the garden and threw himself onto the ground. If he wasn't careful, this could all spiral out of control and he'd have the whole damn family to contend with.
"Teddy?" a timid voice asked.
Teddy jumped up so fast Lily wasn't sure he'd been sitting at all. "Are you alright?" she asked.
"What? Yeah, yeah, just needed some fresh air," Teddy rambled. He bit his lip, the only fool-proof way to get himself to stop talking. The petite fifteen-year-old before him crossed her arms and pursed her lips. Teddy knew that posture, it was one Ginny used on all the kids when she caught them in a lie. Apparently Lily had not only copied the look, she'd perfected it. Teddy felt his walls crumbling down faster than he even knew possible.
"Ok," he relented. "I actually came to get away from your cousin."
"Rose or Victoire?"
Teddy gaped. How did Lily know Rose threatened him?
As though reading his mind Lily said, "I spoke to Al. He said Rose was scary as hell and you fled out here. She's been known to have that effect on people."
Lily crossed the distance between them and dragged Teddy to the ground so they were sitting across from one another in the grass. "Spill," she ordered.
"There's nothing to tell."
"Teddy, please, I know you better than anyone here, better even than Dad or Victoire. Something's bothering you, something other than Victoire's hissy fit in the kitchen or an uber-scary Rose." Lily took one of his hands in her's; Teddy nearly jumped out of his skin at the contact. "Now spill," Lily repeated.
Teddy stared at the fifth year. He couldn't, he shouldn't. He had to. "Victoire saw us yesterday. She knows."
"Knows what?"
Teddy shook his head, forcibly removing his hand from Lily's grasp. "I can't, I'm sorry. You're underage and I can't. I can't."
Recognition flashed across Lily's fine features. "Oh, Teddy," she breathed. "Is that what's come between you and Victoire? She thinks you're cheating on her with me?" Lily started laughing, almost howling. Teddy stared at her. "That is the funniest thing I have ever heard! What does she take us for? Do I need to sign a written statement confirming that you've never touched me? Merlin, Victoire is such a drama queen!"
While Lily continued to laugh, Teddy began to stew. Mabye he was incorrect in his analysis of his feelings. He'd seen Lily last Christmas and Easter breaks and nothing had changed. But when she stepped off the Hogwarts Express yesterday everything changed. She was no longer the little girl in pigtails he'd given piggy-back rides to, or the infant who would only let Harry, Ginny, or Teddy hold her. She was nearly grown up- no, she was grown up. When had that happened?
"Stop laughing Lily. It's not too far from the truth," Teddy admitted, eyes downcast.
Lily quieted abruptly. She reached out towards Teddy, thought better of it, and clasped her hands in her lap. "I know," she whispered.
Teddy's head snapped up. "What?"
"Teddy, I've loved you from the day I was born. I just thought I loved you like I love James and Albus. You were always around, you always took care of me like a big brother, so I figured it was natural that I love you." Lily wouldn't meet Teddy's gaze. She stared at her hands as she fiddled with the rings on her fingers. "When you and Victoire got together, I wasn't jealous. I was actually pretty excited. If you two got married, you'd really be family. But you've always been family. I realize now that I only wanted you guys dating so you'd have to stick around. I was afraid that since you'd graduated and become an Auror, you'd leave us."
"Lily, I will never leave you. You're all the family I have, and I love you guys," Teddy said. He sighed. "I think you're right, though. I was using Victoire as an excuse to stay nearby. I just didn't realize, or wasn't willing to realize, that I wanted to stay close to you."
"Where does that leave us?" Lily asked, finally looking up.
Teddy stared into her brown eyes and impulse took over. He sat up on his knees, pulled Lily onto her's, and kissed her.
When they broke the kiss, Teddy said, "We can't tell anyone. You're underage and with your family... I don't know how they'd react. And I don't want people saying crap about us, or about me and Victoire. I owe you both that."
Lily nodded in acquiesence before pulling Teddy down for another kiss.