Mismatched
A/N: ABSOLUTELY no point. And no, I did not hit my head on something sharp and hard.
Disclaimer: Gensomaden Saiyuki, Saiyuki Reload, Saiyuki Gunlock Reload, all belong to Kazuya Minekura. If I owned them, they'd already be half abandoned in some notebook.
Sanzo irritably squeezed one end of his robe sleeve and watched the rainwater pour out, making a small puddle on the cavern floor. He glared at it, as if trying to frighten it into drying off quickly. When that obviously didn't work, Sanzo let out a small sigh. It'd be pointless to wear this drenched thing when it was obviously cold what with the wind and the rain outside. He'd catch a cold or something worse, giving the idiots an excuse to irritate him some more. Hakkai would just chuckle in that really annoying tone of voice.
Removing the top half, (he wasn't about to remove the entire robe, thank you very much) he took out a rather soggy cigarette packet and an equally wet lighter. Thankfully, the cigarettes inside were dry enough to light up. Sanzo let the smoke go through his nose, letting it warm him. He glanced at the rain.
This would be one of those long irritating days.
Sitting down on a conveniently flat rock, he continued staring outside.
Boy, he hated the rain.
Nevertheless, it was still more interesting than staring at rock within the cavern. At least the rain moved. So, Sanzo continued to gaze out, his mind somewhere in Kinzan Temple and 10 years into the past.
The images of the familiar orange plane took place, sailing across the blue heavens. A soothing voice commenting on the beauty of the contrasting colours rang in his ears. He heard his own voice, considerably younger, agreeing in a murmur.
Someone bursting right into the cavern without noticing him at all rudely interrupted the time travel. He looked up, ready to yell if it was one of the idiots or Hakkai. An eyebrow rose in slight surprise.
"Yaone…?"
The very wet youkai turned, her eyes growing wide.
"Sanzo-san!"
The sound of heavily pouring rain echoed from the outside and within the cavern. The thundering bounced off the stone walls and off the floor. Two figures sat across one another.
Sanzo let out a deep breath. If the chemist was here, it meant that Kougaiji and co. were also here. And if Kougaiji was here, it meant that LIRIN was here. Somehow, had the orange haired brat with pointy ears burst in, it would not have surprised him. He knew very well that the heavens seemed to have a twisted sense of humour when it came to his life. Why else would he be stuck with this unusual ability to attract youkais with large appetites?
Yaone on the other hand, he had not anticipated. This was one of the enemies he didn't bother with or thought about unless it came up. Still, she had no malicious intent, she was naturally more interested in getting her hair to dry and Sanzo had a vague feeling she was a female version of Hakkai. Without the whole smiling bit. That meant she was just that much less annoying. That fact made Sanzo less likely to kill her in this rainy atmosphere.
Curiousity did a headlock on grumpiness at the rain long enough to make some inquiries.
"So, how'd you end up here?"
"Etto… it got foggy all of a sudden and Lirin-sama suddenly fell off her Hiryu. I jumped, trying to save her but… I couldn't. I landed in a bush and the rain stared pouring heavily… that's when I ran into the cavern…and…"
Sanzo crossed his arms. "So it wasn't your doing…"
Yaone looked surprised. "Of course not."
The monk didn't reply as he crossed his arms and stared out into the rain. Obviously fog with rain wasn't unusual but when it suddenly tried to pour on Sanzo and company twice in one day, this was the work of some youkai.
Dumb youkai but youkai nonetheless.
"Ano… how did you wind up in here, Sanzo-san?"
"Hakkai lost control of the jeep and couldn't stop in time thanks to the fog and rain. All of us got thrown out so now we're all separated." He rolled his eyes to look at Yaone. "No doubt Kougaiji and your friends must have done the same."
Yaone nodded. "Sou ne… I guess we'll just have to wait till the rain eases."
Sanzo said nothing else but a displeased expression made it clear he didn't like the situation he was in.
Grumpiness kicked curiousity in the butt and silence descended.
Seeing as there would be no other conversation made, Yaone decided to just stare at the rain like Sanzo. It'd been a long while since she had been able to just sit and not do anything so she was rather grateful for the solitude.
Then again, she didn't find it quite comfortable sitting in a cavern staring at the rain with Sanzo the 'enemy'. Particularly since he was leader of the people they were supposed to be fighting.
Now, if it'd been Hakkai-san, things would be… a little different. But she was stuck here with Sanzo and she might as well make the best of it.
She wondered just how to make the best of it really. The only thing she knew about Sanzo was that he was a monk, he smoked, he shot things and he whacked Gojyo-san and Goku-san on the head with the paper fan he carried with him.
Oh, and he looked pretty cute.
After a pause and a minute's worth of mental kicking and slapping, Yaone silently wondered if that was considered treason towards Kougaiji-sama. Not to mention ludicrous since this was a MONK and SANZO she was thinking about.
Had Yaone been in the presence of other young women, they would have told her that was a normal thought when you came across a blonde haired, purple eyed monk who was so obviously bishounen or biseinen. Regardless of profession and demeanour, the fact was that this monk attracted the attention of women and men alike. (For what reasons, of course, is best left up to speculation…)
Shrugging the thought off and shelving it under the 'Never-To-Think-About-Again' category, Yaone continued looking at the rain. Not surprisingly, it started becoming cold and since Yaone was wearing what seemed to be a bathing suit underneath a sleeveless jacket, she started to shiver. The wind was starting to get to her, not to mention the fact she was soaked through. As she rubbed her arms to generate some warmth, she flicked her eyes over to where Sanzo was sitting.
Slight envy ran through her at the sight of him looking completely normal and not bothered by the cold even if he was just wearing a black… something. Must be the cigarette smoke, figured Yaone. She turned her eyes back to her knees. Maybe if she thought about hot things, she'd manage to convince herself she was warm.
Great big roaring fire… warm bath… lots of spicy curry…
"Oi."
Jolting, she turned to look at the monk. "Hai?"
Sanzo nodded at the ground. A lighter and a folded up newspaper had been thrown to her feet, both items surprisingly dry. Yaone's eyes widened in amazement. She looked back up at him.
"How did you…"
Yaone trailed off since Sanzo had already turned away to look at the rain again.
Deciding not to question, she quickly gathered up some medium sized rocks scattered across the floor. She arranged it in a ragged circle deeper within the small cavern, a fair distance from the rain.
Soon, a rather small bonfire was crackling away, giving light to the cavern and much needed warmth to Yaone. She smiled at the flickering flames, her uncovered shoulders already warming up. Yaone looked back up at the monk who still sat near the front of the cavern, apparently deep in thought.
She walked towards him, handing out the lighter. It took some minutes for him to glance behind and take back the lighter without a word.
"Thank you, Sanzo-san... ano...it's warmer by the fire and your clothes will dry faster…"
Sanzo said nothing, still focused on the rain.
A long time around Dokugakuji and Kougaiji when they were in bad moods had sort of made Yaone used to this sort of behaviour. Shrugging slightly, she walked back to the fire and sat down, staring into the flames. She wondered where the rest were, wondering if they were in the rain or trying to get dry like her. She wondered if Lirin-sama was all right. It had been a long way to fall and Yaone had considered herself fortunate she had only some minor scratches she could easily tend to. She just hoped Lirin-sama was just as lucky.
She really SHOULD steal the sutra, she knew. After all, if she did, then their job would be done.
But then again, Sanzo-san looked cranky, they were all wet and if she DID take the sutra and managed to get away somehow, it would result in an endless, bloody battle over who got it.
Despite the fact that THAT was what was supposed to happen if and when they managed to get the sutra, Yaone just really didn't feel like moving from the fire at the moment. Besides, it was dishonourable to take advantage of an enemy's weak points. (For convenience's sake, Yaone decided that Sanzo was vulnerable in the rain. He did look pretty zoned out...)
And it'd be doing Gyokumen a favour, which was something even gracious, polite Yaone couldn't bring herself to do.
Not to mention that she was tired and in need of rest. The echoing sound of the rain and the warmth of the fire was lulling Yaone to sleep, slowly but surely. As her eyelids got heavier and heavier, she glanced blurrily at Sanzo. He still sat there, silent and unmoving.
Her eyes closed.
And Sanzo continued staring at the rain, his mind back at Kinzan Temple 10 years before.
Hakkai sighed as Gojyo placidly took a drag on his cigarette. Goku didn't look it but he was worried as he sat on the ground of a small cave. Hakuryu slept in his master's lap.
Kougaiji was sitting opposite them, frowning. Lirin was drawing idly in some sand while Dokugakuji kept an eye on the fire.
The reason why they weren't trying to kick each other's butts was because everyone wasn't there. And it was glaringly obvious just who was missing.
All of them weren't too happy about it.
Sure, there were fewer whackings with Sanzo gone but it didn't seem to fit that YAONE was missing as well. It should have been LIRIN who had gone missing. At least, then they weren't worried so much. It was one of those unspoken rules. Kougaiji fought with Goku, Doku took on his brother Gojyo, Hakkai and Yaone fought each other respectfully while Sanzo landed up with Lirin.
Not SANZO and YAONE ending up missing together.
Of course, one could always take hope in the fact that it'd be too damned a coincidence for those two to, shall we say, end up in the same shelter together. The possibility of that was like a hundred million to one. It was a HUGE forest…
Then Kougaiji realized whom he was sharing shelter with.
Their lives were FRAUGHT with coincidences that had a million to one odds.
Of COURSE, the bouzu would end up with Yaone in some cave somewhere…
"You know…" said Gojyo breaking the silence. "There's nothing to worry about. Sanzo never pays any of THAT kind of attention to women. Yaone's safer than she is alone."
"Just what makes you so sure she's stuck with the monk?" asked Kougaiji scathingly, despite himself.
"Please. Don't ask questions when you already know the answers."
"But then again… Yaone-san has never, etto…" How could Hakkai put this? "Faced Sanzo before… and you know what Sanzo is like…"
Images of chibi Sanzo whacking the heck out of a chibi crying Yaone appeared in all their heads.
Lirin had to grab a hold of Dokugakuji and Kougaiji's clothes to keep them from barging out of the cave. Hakkai's left eyebrow twitched a little while Gojyo gave his green-eyed friend a wary look. Goku looked disturbed then shook his head.
"Y, Yaone-neechan wouldn't get hit. She's like Hakkai! She's too nice to get hit!"
That seemed to calm everyone down.
Until Gojyo opened his mouth.
"Well, what if… what if Sanzo's really mad… and Yaone just happens to try and take the sutra away…"
Images of chibi Sanzo shooting at chibi Yaone holding the sutra as she ran off materialized in everyone's heads simultaneously.
"DOKUGAKU!! That won't HAPPEN!! Will you QUIT trying to go off in the rain!?" Gojyo gripped onto his brother's coat with Lirin's help
Hakkai was twitching a little more as he helped Goku grab hold of Kougaiji's shirt. "Kougaiji-san, Gojyo was just speculating. That's not going to happen…"
Goku vigorously nodded. "Yeah, calm down! Sanzo's not like that!!"
Sometimes… thought Gojyo with a grimace as they all sat back down.
Some minutes of silence went by.
"You know… " said Dokugakuji slowly. "Yaone IS a chemist… and she DOES have a couple of poisons on hand…"
Chibi Yaone was now force-feeding chibi Sanzo arsenic.
"GOKU!! He was joking! You just HAD to say that, didn't you, Dokugaku?!"
Hakkai tried to keep from looking like he had a nervous tic in his left eye as he kept a hold on a struggling Goku's cape with Gojyo. Lirin looked bewildered alongside Dokugakuji. Kougaiji looked blank, the image of that too good to be true. He shook his head and came back to reality.
"Not possible. Both Yaone and the monk would be too preoccupied with finding shelter to harm one another."
Everyone digested those slow words and Hakkai's nervous tic subsided as relief seeped back into all of them. Gojyo released Goku's cape with a sigh.
Then Lirin went wide eyed.
"Unless… un, unless… they're, uh…. uh…"
Everyone stared at her.
Lirin looked horrified.
"Unless they're both in a dark cave right now dead."
Chibi Sanzo and Chibi Yaone were lying on a dark floor, stone cold and unmoving.
"AAAARGH!!!"
Well, Gojyo, Doku, Goku and Lirin went "AAAARGH!!!" anyway. Hakkai and Kougaiji just sat there and twitched.
After the initial terror subsided, everyone agreed that it was a damn stupid idea. Sanzo and Yaone dead? Come on. Lirin looked shame faced.
However, the aftershock still lingered and everyone kept half an eye outside, wishing for the rain to be over and the fog to dissipate soon so they could find out what happened to those two and stop worrying so much.
"You know…" suddenly came the quiet voice of Gojyo. "What if that monk just decided to corrupt himself some more and uh… kiss Yaone …?"
Chibi Sanzo kissing Chibi Yaone.
…
"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARGH!!"
"DAMMIT, GOJYO! STOP THINKING!"
"Oi, get up."
Yaone felt someone kicking her leg. Blurrily, she propped herself up on her elbows and blinked, wondering who was in her room at Houtou Castle.
Then it all came back to her in a flash.
She was in a cavern with a certain enlightened soul who didn't seem all that enlightened whom she was enemies with.
Getting up instantly, she saw the fire had died and Sanzo was already moving out of the cavern. Yaone quickly ran out and at first, felt slight relief go through her. The rain had finally stopped and the fog…
Sanzo cursed. "K'so."
Yaone grimaced. The fog hadn't lightened one inch.
"What do we do?"
Sanzo raised an eyebrow at her. "We?"
Yaone looked uncomfortable. "Well… considering that Kougaiji-sama, Lirin-sama and Dokugakuji are probably around and the rest of your group are around as well… there's a good chance they'll have bumped into each other by now…"
Irritated, he lit a cigarette and let the smoke flow through him and breathed it out again. After a minute of silence, he deigned to reply. "It's a large forest."
She shrugged. "I've just got a feeling."
Sanzo considered it then remembered just what kind of day it was.
One of those long, irritating, days that were chock full of coincidences.
"Don't slow me down."
"Of course."
The two headed right, since it was the direction where Yaone could remember coming from last night. Yaone called out her friends' or the rest of the Sanzo-ikkou's names as she walked, hoping to find them. Sanzo raised an eyebrow but looked around anyway, trying to spot a familiar idiotic face. Or Hakkai's really ingratiating smile.
"LIRIN-SAMA!! DOKUGAKUJI!! KOUGAIJI-SA-mmph!"
Sanzo had placed a hand over her mouth, and dragged her close to the ground in a crouch, his gun ready and out. "Shut up!" hissed the monk fiercely.
Yaone removed his hand from her face and got her spear out. "What is it?" she whispered.
Then, she went wide-eyed. Youki. Youki emanating from someone hidden amidst the fog.
Then, at the corner of her eye, she saw something coming towards her and Sanzo.
"ABUNAI!!"
As Sanzo jumped away and she flipped to the side, a streak of blue lightning split through the fog and a greasy sounding cackle resounded. Yaone heard the monk curse some more and gun shots rang out as the fog enveloped her once again.
"Kisama! Who the hell are you?!"
The same greasy cackle resounded. Yaone could barely figure out where it came from her crouch on the ground.
"The one who will take away your life, GENJO SANZO!"
Yaone heard a mutter beside her. She glanced to her right to see Sanzo, gun at the ready and face really, really ticked off. "That's what they all say. Listen up…"
"SANZO!!!"
"YAONE!!"
"OI BOUZU!! WHERE THE HELL ARE YOU?!"
"YAONE-CHAN!!"
"YAONE!!"
"SANZO!!"
"K'so, this stupid fog's making all this hard to see!"
"Gee, you think?"
"Now isn't the time to-"
"SANZO-SAN! NOW!"
Dokugakuji, Kougaiji and Lirin went wide eyed. "YAONE!!?"
"MAKAI TENJO!!!"
Gojyo, Hakkai and Goku went frantic. "SANZO?!!"
"YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARGH!!"
The fog dissipated and everyone saw, much to their disbelief, Yaone standing behind a sutra entangled blue skinned youkai hanging in mid air. Sanzo pulled the trigger and the youkai of course, died.
There was a moment's silence.
Before the six scrambled over to demand to know just what the friggin' heck was going on.
As Sanzo adjusted his sutra, Yaone smiled. "It turns out that youkai was trying to capture Sanzo-ikkou but we got caught as well. He was the one who caused the fog and the rain."
"Obviously." Muttered Gojyo.
"Anyway, while Sanzo-san distracted the youkai, I pinpointed his exact location. Then I made a small explosion, Sanzo-san used the sutra and… well…" Yaone trailed off.
Kougaiji gave Sanzo a glare. "He didn't do anything to you, did he?"
"Nandato?" growled Sanzo, a vein throbbing on his forehead.
Yaone quickly shook her head. "No, I'm alright. Sanzo-san didn't do anything at all."
Goku thought he saw Kougaiji AND Hakkai look relieved.
"Maa, since we're all here…" said Lirin. "BALDIE, you're going down!!"
"Get lost, you irritating gaki!"
"Hand the sutra over, bouzu!"
"Over your dead body."
"Oi, Doku! I'm gonna kick your ASS!"
"HAH! You've got a long way to go before you manage to do that!"
"Nice to see you again, Yaone-san."
"You too, Hakkai-san."
And chibi Sanzo-ikkou fought with chibi Kougaiji-tachi.
"This is unusual…" muttered Gojyo to himself.
"What's unusual?" questioned his elder brother over the clashes between his sword and his little brother's shakujou.
"Usually when we fight, SOMETHING interrupts the brawl."
"Well, today must be our lucky day the-!"
Dokugakuji couldn't even finish the sentence before he felt a drop of water fall onto his face.
Then another drop.
And another and another and another and another and another and… aw heck, you know.
It started to rain.
"I thought you KILLED that creep!!" demanded Gojyo of Sanzo.
"I DID, you ass. This is REAL rain."
"Another time then, Sanzo-ikkou. I'd hate to fight in such a condition."
Doku whacked his brother on the head. "Didn't I tell you to stop thinking!?"
.
End.
A/N II: NO! I didn't hit my head!! And this doesn't mean that I support any such pairing of Sanzo x Yaone. That's about as possible as Gojyo swearing he's not going to invent any more cheesy pick up lines. This just means I have a strange sense of humour.