Manami: Hey everyone! Merry Christmas! Back again with a one shot.
Vincent: mmhmm. We being the lazy bums that we are…
Manami: excuse you! I'm not lazy, you are!
Vincent: oh shaddup.
Manami: anyway, it's a Christmas fic!
Vincent: no duh.
Manami: shaddup. Anyway, this is dedicated to Lady Hiran for giving us the idea! Arigatou gozaimasu!
Vincent: Hannah, disclaimer.
Hannah: ok! Disclaimer: Vincent and Haru do not own Naruto at all! Or Haru's friends that are in it cuz they belong to themselves.
Manami: We also don't own the kick ass Naruto version of The Christmas Song at the end of the story. Lady Hiran does; unless she would like to give the rights to us?
"…blah…": Talking
…blah…: thinking (most of the time)
-…blah…-: doing
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The Crazy Shinobi X-Mas
"Sakura-chan, how's it going on your side?" Naruto yelled across the huge ballroom.
"It's all right!" she shouted back.
Sulking in a far corner was Uchiha Sasuke, who grumbled, "How the hell did you talk me into this, Naruto…"
Meanwhile, said person was running around, being his usual happy self; if possible, happier. All of a sudden, a ringing doorbell was heard.
"I'LL GET IT!" Naruto screamed. Unfortunately, he tripped and fell. Anyway, Sasuke was already at the door, ready to fend off anyone. Well, almost anyone. He opened the door, and…
"HIIIIIIIIIIIIII NARUTO-CHAAAAAAAAAAAAN!" the group of girls (and a guy or 2) chorused.
One girl looked down. "YO! It's just Sasuke. I told you." Her name was Haru.
"HEY! You guys are here early…" Naruto commented.
Another girl by the name of Ellie piped up. "Well of course! We wanted to help decorate!"
"Provided you're not almost done?" Yuna inquired.
"SOME HELP WOULD BE NICE HERE!" Sakura shouted from her wobbly perch on the ladder.
"You're a kunoichi, are you not? Work it out yourself." Haru nonchalantly called back.
"That was not a nice thing to say, Haru." Charlene scolded.
"I don't really care. Plus, she's a ninja. She should be able to take care of herself." As soon as she finished talking, Sakura lost her balance and fell.
A guy named Vincent sped forward and caught her; then set her down.
Haru's best friend Rikku was cheering and going on about how awesome Vincent is and how awesome he looked when he caught Sakura and all that other stuff.
"Thanks." Sakura mumbled out.
"Be more careful. I might not be there next time." He replied. At that, she blushed. The blush was pretty light and went unnoticed to all except for the watchful eyes of Haru.
Oh wow. First my best girl friend, now that bitch! Gah! Who else is going to fall for my best guy friend!
After a few moments of silence, Rikku yelled out, "LET'S GET THIS X-MAS PARTY STARTED!"
later…
"Yay! We're done decorating!" Ellie cheered. "It's so pretty…" And it was true. The Uchiha mansion was a sight to be seen. And of course, Sakura had put mistletoe all over the place.
-DING FRIGGIN DONG-
"SOMEONE GET THE DAMN DOOR!" Haru yelled.
Naruto did so and came face to face with: Neji, Hinata, Shino, Ino, Shikamaru, Kiba, Gaara, Kankuro, Ten Ten, Chouji, Iruka, Kakashi, Gai, Temari, Sarutobi Asuma and Sendaime, Tsunade(baa chan), Rin (I know, I made her come all this way…), and some other people.
"HEY EVERYONE! COME ON IN!" Naruto greeted. Next thing you know, everyone's rushing in like a stampede! As for Naruto, he was now paper flat, drifting to the floor.
with Hinata
Naruto-kun, if you would just get under a mistletoe! Hinata thought. She was following- actually, more like stalking him (a bit too close), attempting to follow him under one of the many sprigs of mistletoe hung all around the place.
with Naruto
Ok, Hinata is following me around everywhere! Creepy… hmmm... Maybe she's just lost and wants to stay with someone she knows! He reasoned. Now to get Sakura-chan under mistletoe! He walked around trying to find Sakura.
with Sakura
OOH! Where's Sasuke-kun? I hope Ino-pig hasn't gotten to him first! But then again, there's always Vincent… she hesitated. Gah! Wait, am I bing stalked by Rock Lee! Overcome with paranoia, she looked around with a frying pan in her hand.
"Hey Sakura!" She turned around, and without looking, hit Vincent, thinking it was Rock Lee. . --- Vincent
Haru rushed over. "OMG! YOU HIT VINCENT! YOU BASTARD!"
Sakura panicked. Then she saw Rock Lee coming. She then shoved the frying pan into his hands. (oh yea, sooo subtle.)
Rock's eyes widened. "For me, Sakura? I shall take this as a token of your undying lo-"
"HE DID IT!" she yelled, pointing at the thick-eyebrowed boy. Everyone shouted, "YOU BITCH!" and started chasing after Rock. Heh heh. Now to get Sasuke-kun.
with Vincent
-twitch twitch- Ow.
back to the normal view
Another doorbell ring was heard. –DING FRIGGIN DONG-
Augh… Sasuke thought as he went to get the door. When he did he was greeted with a ………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………
"HEY BABY BROTHER!" from a very hyper and happy Uchiha Itachi. With Sasuke's brother was: Mamochi Zabuza, Haku, Orochimaru, Eric Lee, Steven Young, Gabriel Hwang, and Eugene Kim. (the last 4 are Haru's friends. The last one is also Vincent's friend, too.)
Sasuke just looked at his brother in complete and utter shock. Then, finally comprehending what Itachi said, a vein started pulsing on his head and he yelled, "DON'T CALL ME THAT!"
"Why not?" Itachi cheerily replied.
He shook his head. "I can't believe this." He grumbled.
Once again, everyone outside rushed in.
"WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING!" he yelled in a frenzy.
"This is my house too, you know." Itachi nonchalantly replied.
"GAH! I CAN'T TAKE THIS!" Sasuke started banging his head on the wall.
"That's going to kill your brain cells." Gabriel commented.
"We know, captain obvious." Steven commented on Gabriel's comment.
Haru popped in. "He's going to be stupider that even Steven! Haha! I rhymed! Even Steven! Hahahahaha!"
"Oooook….."
"Don't you dare 'oooook…..' me, Gabriel Hwang! I know you like Ellie!"
"Haha, you like Ellie." Steven said.
"no I don't."
"Speaking of which, where is she?" Eugene inquired.
"Off trying to spike the punch, I guess." Haru answered. "But that's my job!"
with Ellie and Eugene
"Ok! The spike is punched! No wait, I mean, the punch is spiked!" Ellie whispered while Eugene was laughing like crazy repeatedly saying the punch is spiked.
"Ellie, that was not nice. Everyone's going to get drunk!" Charlene reprimanded.
"Which is exactly the point. That was, the party is funner!" Eugene said.
"Eeyore is cool!" Ellie randomly shouted. Then she went off, humming the Winnie-the-Pooh song. Charlene just sighed and went to keep an eye on her. As for Eugene, he just went off to somewhere.
with Vincent and Haru (yes, the author and authoress of the story…)
"Haru, keep an eye on your friends. I have a feeling someone is stalking me. I want to get a cup of punch." Vincent told Haru.
"I bet it's just Ellie and Eugene, keeping an eye on the punch to see what happens to the people who drink the spiked punch…" she sighed.
Vincent paid no attention to the authoress (and will pay for that) and took a drink of the punch. A few seconds and nothing happens. Ellie and Eugene, from a secret spot, watched very closely at their first victim.
"Hey, Haru, this punch tastes kind of like vodka…. Yummm….." he commented.
Haru's eyes widened. "ELLLIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE! That was my job spiking the punch."
The duo came out of the hiding spot and she lightly answered,"Oh well. Too bad."
With Sasuke
Sasuke was so damn drunk that he was flirting with Yamanaka Ino. Unfortunately, Sakura was stalking him and got mad. "Oh well. If Sasuke is falling for that bitch, then I'm going for Vincent, since I know that she likeshim too! Muahahahahahahahahahahaha!"
But before she could go off looking for Vincent, she saw a very interesting sight. Naruto walked past Sasuke and Ino in his Oiroke no Jutsu form (with clothes.). Next thing you know, Sasuke was drooling and following after her! Uh, him! Um, what! You know what I mean.
Sakura's jaw dropped. He must be seriously drunk… Ino started crying, then beat Naruto up, then decided to drink punch. (uh-oh…)
15 min later…
By now, everyone except Haru has had at least 5 cups of punch. Haru is a strict non-drinker. So, now everyone is crazy! And guess what? They decided to play Truth or Dare! Oh boy… Sasuke went first.
"Aniki, truth or dare?"
Itachi was surprised. "You still call me that, Even after I went crazy?"
"GAH! Answer the damn question! Truth or Dare!"
"Fine. Dare me, little brother, and do your worst." He challenged.
"I intend to." Sasuke retorted. After thinking for a while, Sasuke finally spoke. "I dare you to screw Sakura. In front of everyone."
"EWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!" Haru yelled, obviously grossed out from the dare. "Sasuke, did you really have to say that?"
"Yes." He curtly answered.
"REALLY REALLY?"
He looked at her for a while, then said, "Fine. I won't make him do it. Instead, he must French her for at least a minute."
-Inner Sakura: WHAT! AND LOSE MY FIRST KISS TO HIM! -sigh- at least it's an Uchiha. He and Sasuke look really alike, though…-
5 min later
Haru made a face. "Ok, you guys can stop now… It's been, what, 5 minutes?"
The two reluctantly pulled away. -Inner Sasuke: YES! SHE DOESN'T LIKE ME ANYMORE!-
After another hour of Truth or Dare, they ('they' meaning just Haru) decided to stop. Blame soberness. The others were completely inebriated.
"That… may have been the stupidest game of Truth or Dare I have ever lived through." She muttered to herself. (details of the game will not be revealed for fear of having to change this to an M rated fic. just use your imagination.)
"soo…What should we do now?" someone wondered.
Ellie and Haru immediately shouted a suggestion. "LET'S SING CHRISTMAS CAROLS!"
They sang Jingle Bells, We Wish You A Merry Christmas, Let It Snow, It's Beginning to Look A Lot Like Christmas, and a Naruto Version of A Christmas Song.
Kyuubi's roasting on an open fire,
Zabuza ripping at your nose.
Holiday songs being sung out of tune,
A merry X-mas to you!
"MERRY/HAPPY CHRISTMAS/HANNUKAH/KWANZAA!"
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Manami: singsong: and a happy new year! So that's our x-mas present! Crappy as it is, it would make this little girl so much happier on her depressing and shitty and crappy and gay Christmas if you could just take a minute to review. Please? I didn't get anything I wanted and at church I had to clean the bathrooms! Eww… all I got were earrings, some clothes, and a lip gloss! I don't wear earrings, I 'm happy with the clothes I had already, and I think make-up is shit that you put on your face just out of vanity! It's gross!
Vincent: mmhmm. Just click the little purple button….
(Afterword: I KNOW it's not Christmas anymore, but I just had to change some things.)