Disclaimer: I do not own the turtles or any relating characters.

I'm Sorry

Shock and confusion

That's what took over my brain,

As I stood hoping it was a delusion.

But slowly I was took by frustration.

We argued in the rain,

And I wondered what could be his explanation.

He says he is fine,

That he doesn't need me.

He says he doesn't need to follow the plan I design.

He just doesn't understand

How better off he would be

If he would listen to command.

He says he needs no help on his part,

That he needs no guidance.

But he doesn't know how that would tear at my heart.

He's my little brother, I've watched out for him since we could walk.

I wonder when our relation went into subsidence.

I miss those times we would sit and talk.

I only try to do what is best

To keep my family from being hurt.

He always turns it into a big contest.

I don't think he knows the responsibility,

To remain constantly alert,

To protect against all hostility.

I see the anger build inside him,

Raging like and ocean.

His stance becomes so grim.

Even when I saw it in his eyes,

Swarming with emotion,

The aggressiveness behind his attack was still a surprise.

Such force behind each blow.

As I fend off his attempts,

I see his rage grow and grow.

The darkness and rain make his skin gleam.

My mind swirls and tempts

Me to blame myself to the extreme.

He's mad that I was gone so long,

But I did it to help him and the others.

I know I should have come back sooner to where I belong.

I tried so hard to be a success,

Desperate not to fail my brothers,

That I became obsessed.

I was so convinced I wasn't ready,

To be the best leader for our team.

I felt I had failed them too many times already.

Down in Central America, I could do no wrong.

I always answered the screams.

I felt alive, successful, and strong.

Then I know it was time to return,

Back to the much longed for lair,

To have my instructions questioned and spurned.

But would I lead my brothers to victory?

Or lead them only into despair

And prove all of Splinter's confidence in me contradictory?

Then there comes this new threat,

Monsters attacking in the night,

Then disappearing without even a silhouette.

He decides to run off in a rage,

Determined to settle the score,

Eager to engage.

He doesn't understand

That the situation will only blow up more

If he runs off without a plan.

I wish he could see how tempted I am

To leave him on his own

And say I don't give a damn.

But no matter how much I pretend that I wanted,

I couldn't turn my heart to stone.

I couldn't leave him without being haunted.

So I went on my search

And this is what I find.

It gave my world a lurch.

Is he really this insane?

Risking our family for this ideal.

What could he possibly seek to gain?

Suddenly I was brought out of my pondering

By an angry roar and the clang of steel.

I cursed my mind for wandering.

I am overpowered by his attack.

I seemed to stay in suspension

Before landing on my back.

We both seemed frozen.

I felt the build in tension.

We both wondered about the paths we had chosen.

I glance at his sai,

Inches from my face in the ground.

Then we stare into each others eyes.

What would he do

Now that he had me downed,

And the tension grew?

Did he really hate me so much?

Is our brotherhood doomed?

Is it going to end as such?

I know I have been hard on him in the past,

But I have always assumed

Any problems could be surpassed.

Was I wrong?

No matter what action I take

Were we really doomed all along?

All these thoughts lead me to the questions.

How did I make such a big mistake?

When did I get taken in by my obsession?

After all of that training

I have had no success.

My family is waning.

I tried so hard to protect and follow my creed,

But I have to confess

I don't think I am ready to lead.

He took off in a run.

I got up to give chase,

But I couldn't, my mind was stunned.

Suddenly I was surrounded.

The monsters come out of no where.

I couldn't think, my mind still confounded.

I attacked in a hopeless endeavor

And the monster sent me though the air.

I wanted nothing more than to fix the relation that had been severed.

I feel a sharp stinging in my arm.

I see a familiar dart.

I'm too numb to even feel alarm.

I knew if I fought.

As my fighting spirit started to depart,

It would all be for naught.

After all I have done the one thing I dread had become true.

I have failed.

And as my conscience flew,

In my head I wailed,

I'm Sorry!