The cool night air soothed Prince Zuko's skin as he stood on the bridge balcony high above his ship, staring up into the brilliant night sky. Below him, on the deck, the soft sounds of laughter and singing floated upwards and the radiant orange color of a fire pit flickered across the black iron decking as the crew of his ship played their instruments, danced, and had general fun.
Tonight was music night, after all.
He rarely attended the things, preferring instead to isolate himself in his quarters and meditate, but tonight he felt a strange sort of longing. He felt tempted to join in, to laugh, smile, and share some food with his crew. It had been so long since he had truly laughed that he had almost forgotten what that sensation was like.
Of course, there was that instance with that idiot pirate captain and how his ship got stolen, but that hadn't been a truly joyous laugh. He supposed it had been more of a nervous laugh of astonishment.
Winter, Spring,
Summer and Fall,
Zuko smirked to himself as the gruff singing voice of Lieutenant Jee drifted upwards. After his confrontation with the man directly prior to the massive storm they had gotten caught in, Zuko had grudgingly realized that for better or for worse, these men were the last ones in the Fire Nation that actually respected him and followed his orders.
The last remnants of home.
He realized that his banishment wasn't just his own; that these men, also, had been consigned to scour the world for a perpetually elusive Avatar.
Funnily enough, these men were all considered to be "traitors", and had been banished and assigned to Zuko's fateful journey. He remembered meeting the men for the first time, going over their stories with his Uncle.
Lieutenant Jee, for example, had been a distinguished veteran of the ill fated Siege of Ba Sing Se and a hundred other battles. He had become a captain of a small firebender company, but had refused orders to stand and fight in order to save the lives of his men. A heroic tale, truly, but the authorities had not seen it that way. Jee had been stripped of his rank and sent to travel with Prince Zuko. He secretly respected the man, to be honest, and his respect towards his men had only increased after saving the helmsman.
After all, he had reluctantly given up chasing after the Avatar to get the ship into safety.
Corporal Naka, one of his firebenders, had been demoted simply because he had been part of a company that had lost a battle. Another example of the shining care that the superiors back at the Capital City cared for their men.
Four Seasons,
Four Loves,
He idly wondered how his sister and her friends were. He knew for a fact that his old childhood crush, the brooding girl Mai, had a thing for him. She was rather pretty, but he supposed that he would never find out if they would have made a good couple. They had been friends of sorts, and Zuko would have been lying if he said he didn't have feelings for her.
But that was another life. A life that had been torn from him. A life that he would get back.
He thought back to when he had crashed into that Southern Water Tribe village. When he had kidnapped the Avatar and his friends (several times, now), and when he had disregarded the lives of his men to chase that white flying bison that was always just out of reach.
He wondered what his mother would have thought. Would she approve? Would she understand that he was doing this for his honor; a sacred thing that cannot be forgotten? An immeasurably valuable item in their society?
Despite his obsession with capturing the Avatar and regaining his honor, he knew in his heart that his mother would disapprove. How could she not? How could the kind, beautiful mother that gently petted turtle ducks and grew pretty, radiant flowers in the Royal Gardens approve of his violent, hateful behavior? Invading peaceful villages? Being a bully that threatened and hurt people? No, that was something Azula would do.
Was he being like his sister? Was he turning into nothing more than a pathetic, rage-fuelled, warmonger like his sister? Yet what could he possibly do. It's not as if he could give up, call it a day, and return home. This was the only way to normalcy that was available to him.
It was bizarre. His father, an abusive, cruel man that had only ever put Zuko down, berated him, admonished him for weakness, who had scarred him across the face with burning, consuming fire, was the man he was trying to appease. And all he had to do was capture some twelve year old kid with monk's robes.
Four Seasons,
For Love
Lieutenant Jee's voice trailed off in the cool air and there was distant applause from the crew. The normally stoic soldiers that fought for him amusingly were laughing raucously and applauding for the hardened firebender that had just finished his song. That was probably the ship's fire whiskey stores at work.
The Avatar was his obsession, but he felt bad for the kid. Some young child traveling with some other kids, caught up in this war. In another life, they probably would have been friends. He seemed kind enough; he cared immensely for his water tribe friends, that much was apparent. He almost wished he didn't have to capture the kid and drag him off to who knows where to most likely be killed.
But he had no choice. This was the only way. Realizing this, Zuko pushed the sentimental thoughts from his brain. They only slowed him down.
The Avatar was heading North, and he knew that he was no more than a day behind them. Turning around swiftly, he walked back into the bridge, nodded to the helmsman, and descended the stairs towards his quarters, the melody of Lieutenant Jee's song echoing in his head. He quickly undressed, laid in his bed, and cleared his mind of all thoughts.
He had an Airbender to catch.