Title: Pulling Me Back
Author: livelaughloveboo (hey, that's me!)
Warnings: Swearing
Word Count: 2871 words
Summary: Imagine Dean hearing you cry after a heated argument
AN: Now, the song I listened to while writing this hopelessly long one was The Draw by Bastille. God I love them so much. Dan Smith's voice is just so… unf. I can't even come up with proper words to describe the noise produced by his god-like vocal chords. Anyways: Yes, I am working on part two of 'Always With the Scissors' for all of you who wanted it. The sequel is just taking longer to write than expected. But fear not! I should be free this whole week and should be able to churn it out for you guys - maybe even finish some of the other fics that I've started… who knows!
Disclaimer: I don't own Supernatural, the characters, or the song used as inspiration. Although I'll let you know when I do, alright? ;) I also don't this gif either.
Pulling Me Back
The snide comments, bickering, blatant disagreements, and heated disputes had been building up for two weeks until it all blew up. One of them would say something under his or her breaths and the other would react negatively. These blips had only gotten worse as the Mark of Cain made itself home within Dean.
The two were usually able to keep their disputes to themselves and didn't involve anyone else, but this time was different. This time there was yelling and screaming and name-calling and a rather large amount of other things as well.
"You son of a bitch!" She yelled, throwing her hands up in the air. Dean was on the other side of the motel room, standing behind the table defensively.
"What the Hell are you talking about?" He responded angrily.
"Did I really have to hear it from Sam," she pointed to the younger Winchester standing between the two. "that you almost killed an innocent person during the stakeout today? I was there with you two! How in Hell's name did I not hear about this?" She asked, rage boiling her blood through her veins.
"'Cause it's none of your damn business!" Dean replied, yelling so loud his low voice vibrated through the room. She visibly flinched at the tone of his voice, but she recovered quickly. Both brothers noticed, but Dean was beyond the point of apologizing now.
"None of my business? I'll tell you what's 'none of my business'." She said, throwing up air quotes around 'none of my business'. Her voice was rising with each word. "Finding out that the person who's usually level headed during important hunts turns into an trigger happy teenager with the inability to think before he shoots! First Kenosha, now here? Dean what the fuck is wrong-"
"No, you listen here. I do not, under any circumstances, have to listen to you!" Dean roared. He took a step closer to her. "You don't know anything about this! All you do is keep your nose in those books of yours when you're holed up in here and then act all superior when we actually do leave this fucking room! It's unbelieveable how inexperienced you are out there!" He pointed out the windows to the pouring rain. They were lies, but he was too infuriated to care.
"Guys," Sam tried to interrupt, but was ignored by the two as they fought on.
She took a step towards him to that they were close. The two were so close that their heated breaths met and mingled with each other. "Maybe I'm so 'inexperienced' because someone won't let me out of this room with them unless it's for research or food! I'll have you know that I've hunted long before I met you, Dean Winchester!" She stuck her finger into Dean's chest, looking up at his green eyes that swirled with fury. He glared back at her, her touch somehow violating him.
"It doesn't seem like it to me! It literally blows my mind how you're able to fuck up everything - even the simple shit! You can't do anything right." He returned.
She was seething now, snarling at the older brother. "You take that back." She said in a low voice that dripped with deadly venom.
"Please, guys." Sam tried again, but there was no acknowledgement from the two.
"It's not like you could do anything to make me." He commented in the same tone that she had used.
Then she did the unthinkable. She raised her hand and slapped Dean across the face - hard. So hard that there was a dark pink mark on the right side of his face.
When he faced her again, Dean saw a hint of regret in her glassy eyes. But it vanished almost as soon as he noticed it. She was breathing heavily now and he realized the impact of what he had said to her.
He reached out to her and grabbed her arm, trying to apologize. "Look, I-"
"Let go of me, you fucking bastard." She ripped her arm away from him. "You can go right back to Hell." She whispered as she backed away from him. She rushed out the motel room and into the rain pouring outside.
Dean stood there at a complete loss for words. He just stared at the open doorway, as if she was going to come back because she forgot her phone or some other awkward thing like that. But she never did. Five minutes passed - maybe ten - and Dean's feet were still glued to the cheap carpeting of the motel room. Sammy must have been taken aback as well, since he didn't do anything but look out the door and into the rainy day either.
Then time caught up with Dean. He grabbed his jacket and keys, passing his brother as he quickly walked out the door. He had to find her. He couldn't lose her. He didn't know what he would do without her with him. It was like reliving one of his worst nightmares.
As he walked through the rain, he thought of all the possible place she would run off to. She couldn't have gotten very far - that he was sure of. The library was closed and the only other place they had been to while in this god forsaken town was the diner a few blocks away from the motel. That's where she'd be. She had to be there - he knew her too well.
He strode up to the diner and looked through the window, searching for her before walking in. He found her staring blankly at a glass of soda, her index finger circling around the edge distractedly. He almost didn't even enter the place. He opened the door and walked inside the loud diner. He took a stool so that he was far enough away for her not to notice him and run away, but so that he could watch out for her. He needed to figure out what he was going to say to say to her when he did confront her.
A waitress came over to him and asked if he wanted anything. Her name-tag read Gloria and she had a fresh pot of coffee in her grip. "Coffee, please." He answered. He didn't know how long he'd be sitting on the leather stool, waiting for the perfect opportunity to talk with her. The waitress filled his present cup and smiled at him before walking away to the booths.
The waitress - Gloria - stopped at her table. Dean heard the elderly woman ask if his friend was alright. That she had been alone in this diner with only a glass of soda as company for a while. He watched as she looked up at Gloria. Regret and guilt shoved at him like schoolyard bullies. She looked like Hell. He could tell that she had been crying - with the way he treated her, he wouldn't blame her.
"Oh, hon." The grey-haired waitress said, sitting down on the bench across from the younger one. "What happened?" Dean noticed that she looked clearly surprised at the older woman's actions.
"It doesn't matter." She tried to brush the lady off, but Gloria was having none of it.
"Is it a family member?" She didn't do anything. Gloria didn't give up. "Your car?" Nothing. The waitress was persistent. "A boy?" At this, she broke eye contact with good old Gloria and trained her light irises onto the glass in front of her.
"Did he hit you?" Gloria asked, obviously concerned for this stranger's well-being.
"No," the young woman chuckled. "But I did slap him across the face." She looked at Gloria humorously. Then she started to cry. "It was so stupid." Gloria looked at the younger one, concern still etched onto her wrinkled face. "We argued over something so childish." She glanced up at the ceiling for a moment before locking stares with Gloria. "And we've been arguing about childish things for a while now.
"He hasn't always been like this, though. We haven't always been like this. It's the stress of our jobs. I just get so scared that he's going to leave one day and never be able to come back, you know?" Dean watched as she spoke through her tears. He watched as Gloria gazed at her in sympathy. There was something clawing inside him, trying to rip itself free of his chest. Dean knew this feeling all too well - Guilt. Is that how she felt about him? Dean conceded to the fact that he felt the same way about her. It would be one of his worst nightmares if she left and never came back one day. It would kill him. For good this time. "And just this one time, he said something that doesn't usually affect me. But it did and I snapped. I didn't mean to. I just snapped and slapped him."
"Oh, hon." Gloria repeated, reaching out for the girl's hand. She let the wrinkled woman take it and squeeze it reassuringly.
"I wouldn't be surprised if he just left town without me." Dean's gaze snapped from the waitress and back to his hunting partner, surprise flashing through his mind. "I mean, I don't do much good for him anymore." He watched as she looked back down at her glass, dismayed at the thought.
"That can't be true, hon." Gloria placed her fingertips below his friend's chin and lifted her face up. "That boy is probably going out of his mind looking for you right now." The old woman couldn't be more right. He knew what he had to say now.
"Gloria!" A shout came from behind him. "Get back to work!" The two ladies at the booth looked towards the kitchen behind Dean. He quickly turned his body in hopes that they wouldn't notice him listening in.
"I guess that means I have to go, hon. Just wait for a little while. He'll turn up, I promise you." Gloria said before making her exit back to a group of bikers at a booth on the other side of the diner.
When Gloria was out of sight, Dean shot up and practically ran to the booth. He slid in haphazardly and looked at his friend - if she would let him refer to her as that anymore.
Before he could start his apology, she spoke up, "I saw you walk in, you know." She looked at him, her face void of all the emotions he loved on her so much. "This place may be crowded right now, but I always recognize you." She looked down at her drink again.
"Look, cherry-pie - " He started.
"Don't you 'cherry-pie' me, Dean Winchester." She cut him off, looking sharply at his face. The primary emotion on her face now was anger, hot and searing into him. She threw a couple dollars down on the table and walked toward the door. He followed her into the rain.
"You will never know how sorry I really am." Dean announced. "I didn't even mean those things back in the room."
"Then why did you say them?" She asked, turning around to face him. She seemed to be searching his eyes for something.
"I don't know." He answered.
"That's bullshit. And you know it, Dean." She commented, challenging him to tell her the truth. He just couldn't.
"I don't know." He repeated, trying to telepathically tell her to drop the subject so he could continue on with his off-the-cuff apology.
"I'm serious, Dean. Why did you-"
"Because I didn't want you to leave!" The words came out before he could stop restrain them. "If you realized that I'm not one hundred percent all there right now, you would go and never look back. You would leave and never come back and I can't handle that.
"Why do I make you stay in the motel room? Because I'm afraid, okay? I'm afraid that you're going to get hurt or die."
"Dean-" She started.
"You are one of the most important things in my life! If something bad were to happen to you, I would do things that I wouldn't be proud of, alright?" He knew he was rambling off, but he couldn't stop. He had to get it out.
He felt her fingers cupping his cheeks. He leaned into her hands, looking her in the eyes. "I can't lose you." His voice was barely a whisper. "I just can't."
And then she surprised him for the third time that day. She rose up until the their faces were parallel. She then leaned in and kissed him. He was too shocked to do anything at first. Hell, his eyes were probably bugging out of his eye sockets. A million questions were buzzing through his head. Is this real? Is she mocking me? Is this really happening? Why would she do this? Has she realized how pathetic I am? All these questions stopped him from responding properly.
He saw her start to pull away, without a doubt translating his freeze as rejection. But before she could get even an inch away from him, Dean grabbed her face and crashed his lips onto hers. He felt her sigh as their lips moved together in harmony with one another. Her hands moved themselves to his neck, and then to his wet hair where she started to pull on gently. He moaned from the affect she had on him and lowered his own hands down from her face to her hips, pulling her closer to him. Their clothes stuck together in the pouring rain, but he didn't care. He could only describe this moment as pure and unadulterated bliss. As finally earning the one thing that you've worked so hard towards, that you've been craving for for what seemed like a millennium. He would go as far to say that this kiss was definitely a work of God, if he believed in one.
He broke the kiss after what seemed like a lifetime, but kept her close. So close that their panting breaths met with each other.
"I know you were listening back there." She mumbled against his lips, referring to the diner, before pulling away. She opened her eyes and gazed at him. He could see her face as a whole now.
"I'm sorry about that, too." He apologized, looking at her flushed face.
"I thought it was sweet that you came looking for me." She smiled a rare smile up at him and it almost took his breath away.
"Well, don't tell anyone. It might ruin my reputation." He joked, smiling back down at her.
"C'mon." She laughed. God almighty, he loved her laugh. "This case isn't going to solve itself." She grabbed his hand and lead him back to the motel room. Dean - on impulse - rearranged their fingers until they were entwined with each other.
Gloria looked through the window and watched the young couple go off. She smiled knowingly at the two as they smiled at each other and laughed down the sidewalk. She knew he'd find her, that the boy would make amends with the young lady. People just make rash decisions when they're in love, that's all.
AN: That was super long, oh lordy! It took up 7 pages on my google docs. Anyways, I sincerely hope that you've enjoyed this not-so-little fic! You can always drop a message on the PM, through reviewing (both here on fanfiction) or you can just drop me a message via my ask box on my blog (which is linked in my author's page). Hope everybody's summers are going well!
Remember to Smile :)
~Becca