As I promised, a little one shot stemming from Her Return. I really would recommend that you read that one first, because otherwise none of this will make any sense. I did try and make this one happy, honestly, I did. I just do not think I succeeded. Oh, set right after the very last chapter - you may want to reacquaint yourself with that one if you have forgotten. It is quite short. Sorry about that.
Pillars of Sand
Ziva watched as her daughter helped Abby, Tim and Tony dig a hole in the sand. She was tempted to tell them to be careful, but it seemed a little redundant after the month they had had. Caitlin made a comment about reaching the centre of the earth and Tony agreed before McGee pointed out the impossible nature of the plan. She watched her daughter's sober face as her family tried to coax laughs and smiles from the child. Gibbs sat down next to her on the sand and handed her an ice cream, holding his own and a cup of coffee. "Thank you." She nodded. "Is hot coffee and cold ice cream not a contradiction?"
"They didn't have any bourbon." He shrugged. "You doing okay?"
"I do not know." She sighed and shook her head. "I am worried about her."
"And Tony's worried about both of you." Gibbs watched her as she drew her knees in tighter and leaned her chin on them. "Has a right to be."
"I do not need worrying over." She shook her head and stared at him.
"Shows he cares, Ziva. And he cares a lot."
"I know." A smile played on her lips, fleeting but definite.
"The scars will heal and fade." He took her hand and looked at the dim shadows of the blemishes caused by constant pummelling. "Like these ones." He rubbed his thumb gently across her knuckles. "You've stopped?"
"I have not been able to for the past month and a half." She laughed humourlessly.
"You have Tony and Caitlin. That's everything you need. This won't help you anymore." He pointed to the people in the hole, all in swimsuits that suddenly came in very handy when Abby ran over from the shore with a bucket of seawater and tipped it over everyone, drawing a small giggle from the child when her father and McGee both turned to Abby with furious expressions. Tony lifted Caitlin out of the rather deep pit they had created before he and Tim scrambled out, beginning to chase Abby to the water. Ziva watched as they splashed in the waves, the sun reflecting off the shimmering blue brine to leave just their silhouettes. "You cried?"
"No." She looked at him. "Should I have?"
"What you went through, it's not something that you can just block out. The feelings…they'll hurt more if you just leave them."
"I do not want to think about it anymore. The past is in the past." She kept her eyes focused on the scene in front of her, her child playing with her friends, her family. Gibbs placed his arm around her shoulders and pulled her into his side.
"The past is not just the past, though, is it?" He rubbed her arm as she began to shudder with tears. "Sshhh. Its okay." He let her sob quietly; her body huddled into a tight ball at his side. He shook his head to Tony as he walked up the beach towards them and the younger man nodded in understanding, turning back on himself. He held the woman in his arms as he watched his children playing in the waves, running and splashing and jumping. "Are you lonely, Gibbs?" Ziva's words flickered through his memory. "Never alone when you have kids." He'd kissed her forehead and left her sitting at her desk, probably wondering whether she would ever make a good mother like she had been told she would by Miriam Bawali. He watched Caitlin playing with her father. She'd done a fine job on her own, and with DiNozzo to help, things could only go up…
…He hoped – it was DiNozzo after all, she now had the task of raising two children, not just the one.
For my reference: 12th NCIS fic.