Thoughts on Fate
A Haven fanfiction
By: Amanda Croft
Spoilers: 1x10 majorly and other episodes (mostly background info) generally.
Disclaimer: as much as I would love to, I do not own anything from Haven.
Summary: Regardless what the belief, everyone has an opinion about FATE. Just a little post ep. story contemplating the Fantastic Four's outlook on fate.
Fate, Destiny, Providence, Chance, Divine Intervention – whatever you call it, it carries the same meaning: somewhere out there, someone or something predetermined how events would take place, who would meet, what they would do, how they would die. Not everyone believes in this almost abstract theory. Some view it almost as a religion, a theory to live their life by. Others still see things that seem to happen for a reason as coincidence. Some are afraid to believe such a thing can exist because it would mean nothing they do matters, and there really is no free will. Others are comforted by the idea that everything has already been planned out and life will just take its pre-assigned course. Regardless what the belief, everyone has an opinion about FATE.
Nathan was never one to believe in fate. To do so would mean believing there was someone or something out there that wanted him to be numb, and even at his darkest he couldn't believe that. It would just be too cruel to purposely inflict on even his worst enemy. Add to that, all of the problems and deaths and heartache that result from the Troubles and fate had to be some idiotic idea made up by someone with a charmed life. The things he had seen in his life proved without a reason of a doubt that there is no such thing as fate. Then Audrey Parker came into his life, and he started to change his mind. That she, the orphaned daughter of Lucy Ripley, would be the FBI agent to come to Haven chasing down Jonas Lester might indicate fate had a hand. Then again, it could also indicate someone higher up the food chain was meddling, or simply be a coincidence.
Then, Jess left, and Audrey kissed his cheek, and he felt it! Somehow, despite being completely numb for half of his life, he had been able to feel the pressure and texture of her lips against his cheek. Still, that didn't necessarily mean fate was showing its hand. Time wore on and the numbness didn't lift, unless it involves some kind of contact with his partner, and he started believing in fate. There had to be a higher purpose to her being the one that made him capable of feeling. It had saved her life – along with his and everyone else's at that party – and it had brought him a new outlook on life. Something as monumental as that had to be destined, didn't it? There had to be a reason that she was the one he could feel and in her timing arriving in Haven as the Troubles really started heating up again. Trying to work out the hows and whys of fate would drive him crazy … the important thing was that if it exists, it doesn't matter what you do or believe because everything will happen as it's supposed to. He just hopes they get a few answers along the way.
Audrey didn't necessarily give much thought to fate one way or the other before stumbling upon Haven, Maine. When she did, she liked to think that her life had a purpose greater than anything she could see. There had to be a greater reason that she had been orphaned with no clue about her family. There had to be something better for her than what happened to so many of her "brothers" and "sisters" that had aged out of the system before her. There was a purpose for her belief in abnormal events and one day she would find out what that was. Then she was tasked with tracking Jonas Lester down to his home town of Haven. In and of itself a simple task, but it would strengthen her faith in fate. While she was in this little town, she found the first real clue to her mother's identity – thus her own and her family. Added to that, this quaint little town kept throwing her cases that were way past abnormal and comfortably set in super natural. If she stayed here, her ability to think outside the box could be put to some real use and she could hopefully learn more about the mysterious woman in the picture that looked so much like her.
Granted, she told Vanessa that they could make their own fate, and to an extent she believed it, but some things would happen regardless of what you did to stop them. Her belief didn't mean she never second guessed her actions, after all there were some things that could be changed. There were times when her over analytical mind wouldn't let her relax before running over all of the coulda, woulda, shoulda's. What if's plagued her anytime something, especially a case, resulted in bad things for anyone – even guilty people. After Eleanor was killed by the Chameleon, she couldn't help but wonder what would have happened if only she had been able to help Mr. Carter or had been able to stay conscious long enough to get herself out of that trunk. The concept of fate was a solace in times like that, it allowed her to let herself off the hook, stop worrying about how she could have changed things, and move on. Self doubt plagued her again after the most recent case … what if she had never triggered Vanessa's ability? What if she had shot Matt sooner? What if she hadn't told Matt what he could do until after he was cuffed? What if she had forced Vanessa to stay in the truck? And for once, the concept of fate wasn't comforting. Fortunately, this time she had friends to remind her that changing her actions could have resulted in more tragedy than what had occurred. To remind her that she could asks what ifs from here to the end of time and never know the answers. Nathan's offered toast of "screw fate" was far more comforting in that moment than the idea of fate ever had been.
Duke was a firm believer that fate was completely ridiculous. It was the fool or coward's way out of taking responsibility for their actions. Everyone, in his opinion, had the gift of free will and all the good, bad, and ugly that resulted from people's actions was a direct result of making a choice. If you know how something was supposed to happen, there was the possibility of altering it – they had already proven that by preventing all of those high school kids from getting blown to pieces. Vanessa had still died like she had seen, but she knew it was supposed to happen and went to the field anyway – fate had nothing to do with it. There wasn't some cosmic force out there that decided that he should be the roguish pirate, and Nathan the tragic hero. No one out there decided that it was time to once again place havoc on Haven by bringing the Troubles back. No supreme being was responsible for Audrey Parker coming to Haven or Julia coming home. There was always a reasonable explanation. If you looked hard enough you could always find the chain of decisions that led to any one outcome.
When Vanessa first brought up fate, he thought it was a little quirky but didn't give it much thought beyond that. Then he could see Nathan start to really contemplate the theory and couldn't help but call him on it. As much as they seemed to hate each other and be on opposite sides of the law, they really weren't that different fundamentally. Growing up they had been best friends because their basic belief system had been the same. They had mocked people who expressed faith in something as abstract as 'fate' when they were in high school. Now here was this man, so fundamentally like himself, starting to think about changing his view on life. Duke felt a need (possibly deep seated from when they had been friends) to set Nathan straight and was quick to point out that Nathan's theory of fate didn't work because Jess still left. When they were all gathered for drinks later that night, he listened to the others and contemplated everything that had happened and the mission they all seemed to be involved in and he didn't feel his disbelief in fate waver for a moment. So when it came time to toast to the demise of fate, he didn't hesitate.
Julia was rediscovering the concept of fate. When she was young, her belief in fate was as given as her belief in medicine. Nothing anyone could tell her would convince her that it didn't exist. All she had to do was look around her home town and it was evident. As she grew up, her faith in fate was pushed to the back burner. In most medicine, you had to believe the choices you make matter. You visit places like Darfur and you start to see fate as a hallmark card idea. When she came home, it wasn't meant to be long term. She was just coming to stay a couple months until she figured out where she was going next. But then everything at the surprise party happened and she started rethinking the concept of fate. Was it just some coincidence that she came home just in time for her mother to die? Was it chance that her mother was killed by one of the many weird things that occurred in this town that Julia herself had run away from? It just figured that she would feel compelled to step in and take over her mother's duties as town medical examiner and Troubles fighter.
Sitting at that table in the Grey Gull with her old crush, Duke, an old friend, Nathan, and a new one, Audrey, she spent a couple of quiet moments contemplating fate in regards to each of them. If you looked at each person individually, you could take or leave fate – what did it really matter? If you took all four of them as a whole, you couldn't deny the hand of something bigger than them. There was a reason that Audrey had come here when she did and had formed the close relationship that she had with Nathan. Likewise there was a reason that whatever animosities existed between Nathan and Duke were starting to be glossed over in time to deal with this major mystery in the history of the town and the Troubles. There had to be a reason that Vanessa had seen the same thing in relation to both the Colorado Kid and Duke's deaths. There had to be a reason the four of them were sitting at that table in that moment toasting to the ignorance of 'fate'. It had been a crappy day and it was easy to 'screw fate' in that moment, but in the end the good outweighed the bad and fate would always win.
Author's Note: I hope you enjoyed this and as always I look forward to any questions, suggestions, comments, or constructive critisism.