An Unspoken Love

Whenever Inu-yasha makes any contact with me, I get this tingling feeling running up and down my spine. The kind of thing that reminds you that you shouldn't eat breakfast right before you're about to run five miles during gym class. But that feeling is the bad, nauseating feeling. The feeling that Inu-yasha gives me makes me feel, funny.

Not the 'ha ha' funny, or the 'ironic' funny. Just, Funny. That's the only way to really explain it. Funny.

I wonder if I could ever describe it further. But I find it unnecessary, since I would only be explaining it to myself, and I already know what the feeling feels like.

I wonder briefly why I fell for such a pig. An arrogant, stubborn, insensitive, jealous, violent jerk. But that's just his mask. I know that he wears a mask. And I've only seen him toss aside that mask a few times.

And after that he would become flustered and act like nothing happened. But I knew. And I never brought it up again.

It makes me feel special to know that he can toss aside that mask for me every once in awhile.

Even if it is only briefly. Or on accident.

Sometimes he doesn't even know he's showing me his timid side. Yes timid. I know its deep within him. That tough guy act...it's only an act. Deep down, he's only a little child, trying to find acceptance, for what he is, a hanyou.

But that is what he is.

Not who he is. Him being a hanyou does not change him. I would love him if he were a human, a hanyou, or a youkai. That doesn't matter to me; nothing matters to me, just him. I admit, sometimes it hurts, his harsh words, his claim of me only being a tama detector. But I know that he doesn't mean it.

Most of the time.

Some times I'm not sure.

But what we have is deeper than any stream, any river, and any valley. I love Inu-yasha, and I always will. Not Hojo-Kun, not Kouga-Kun, not anyone. Sometimes I hate the web I've woven myself into. Sometimes the love hexagon I'm part of is too much for me. But I never give up that one day, Inu-yasha will see me.

Not see me. I mean see me. As in Kagome. The Kagome that was always beside him, cried for him, loves him.

My family loves him too. He's accepted into my family. Except maybe my jiichan. But he doesn't count.

Anyways, I'm getting off topic here.

"Kagome?" I'm jolted out of my thoughts and I look up and see the topic of my thoughts. His silver hair flowing softly in the light breeze. His ears fully alert for any sign of tension between us. His leg muscles tense, ready to hop away at anytime. Or maybe he's bracing himself for a sitting?

I'm not sure.

He looks at me questionably and I smile softly, patting the grass next to me. He nods his understand and sits near me, I watch his back relax as he lets out a breath he was no doubt holding in.

He smiles softly at me and I look up at the sky, watching the clouds dance by in the wind. They're moving very fast, and I remember hearing my science teacher saying that the winds up there can get to thousands of miles fast. That never ceases to amaze me.

I look over at my hanyou; he's gazing at the sky too. But I know that he's not thinking about how fast the winds are blowing. He has a glazed, far away look on his face. He looks enlightened.

He must have felt my gaze on me because he looks down at me and raises on of his sexy thick eyebrows in my direction, asking an tacit question: 'what?'

I shake my head and return my gaze up to the sky, "It's pretty isn't it?" I look over at my hanyou, his golden eyes staring at the sky, watching the puffy white clouds float away towards the horizon, which is turning a slight yellowish red.

I nodded and smiled, I loved talking to him. Even if it was about the stupidest thing: clouds.

He chuckled deep within his throat and I watch him, he turned towards me with one of his sad smiles, "I used to watch clouds with my mom."

I feel instantly guilty, I look at my feet that are fiddling with each other, "I'm sorry."

"What for?" I look at him questionably, but his expression is unreadable, he sighs deeply, "Don't be sorry about something you didn't do Kagome. I don't mind thinking about her sometimes, as long as my memories are happy."

"Happy?" I asked confused.

"She and I, we used to watch the clouds and pick out animals that "lived" among the clouds. Those are one of the few happy memories I have of my mother, and I don't want to forget them," he turned towards me with his unreadable expression, "It was something she did for only me."

I nodded, though I didn't understand how this was a happy memory, if his mother was gone.

As if reading my thoughts he said, "Even if she is gone, I try to remember the times when she was alive, and beautiful, and full of life."

I watched him sadly and I don't even notice I'm crying until he wipes away one of my tears.

"Don't cry," he said so softly I wondered vaguely if this was the same Inu- yasha I met a year ago, "I hate to see you cry Koibito."

He got up and walked away towards the village and I watched him go, before it sunk in.

"He called me Koibito?" I asked no one but myself as I feel the heat rising to my cheeks, and I get that funny feeling in my stomach.

Funny.

I grin, he called me Koibito. He, he called me, Kagome, Ka. Go. Me. Koibito. I wonder if he meant to, and I look after him.

I decide not to ask him.

After all, there is no need.

I finally understand what that feeling in my stomach is.

It's longing. But not the bitter longing. The kind of longing you wait on, the kind that you know will be fulfilled after some time, if your patient enough.

After all, Inu-yasha and I have

An unspoken