Maura Isles couldn't believe where she was sitting. She couldn't believe she had been brave enough to come. Normally, when thinks like this came up, she preferred to stay home with her turtle, Bass, and pretend what was going on wasn't. But this… this she had to go to. For Frankie. Where was she? The younger Rizzoli's funeral.
He was killed trying to save another officer and was shot in point-blank range. When Jane had called her, crying with the news, her mind blanked. She literally couldn't think. She had lost one of the most important people in her life. She and Frankie had been dating for six months prior to The Incident. She remembered the day they got together clearly.
It was a sunny March day and Maura decided it would be perfect for a run. She got ready quickly and began her jog. A quarter of the way through they younger Rizzoli (who was three months older than herself) asked to join her. She agreed, feeling butterflies in her stomach as they continued their jog.
When they finished, Frankie noticed there was something off with her and asked "Everything okay, Maura?" in that concerned Frankie way of his.
"I like you. As more than a friend." She blurted out and felt herself go red. Frankie just laughed and kissed her, saying he liked her, too. They had been together ever since that day and were happy.
Maura felt tears spring into her eyes at the memory. She wiped her eyes quickly, but the tears refused to leave. They hadn't fallen yet, though, for which she was thankful. She didn't want to cry. Not here. Not now. She looked to her right and saw Jane crying like hell. She felt terrible. Why wouldn't she just cry?
She looked to the front and saw the closed casket. The Rizzoli family had decided to have it closed, not wanting to see the gunshot wound. She saw the picture they had chosen - he was in his uniform. She felt tears spring up again, but she wouldn't cry. She had promised Frankie before he died that she'd be strong through anything their jobs threw at her.
The Priest stood and began the actual service. Maura listened to every word, tempted to cry, but didn't. She knew people at the funeral were thinking she was cold and heartless, but they had no idea how hard this was for her. She felt like a huge part of her had died when Frankie had.
The service ended quickly and the priest stopped to play a video of pictures and clips of Frankie that she and the Rizzolis had put together. She knew this was going to be hard for all of them to see, and they already knew what was in it.
Maura watched, barely fighting back tears the whole time, and thought she had won the battle, until about three fourths of the way to the end, it showed a clip from Maura's birthday, which was a month and a half before the accident.
Frankie, Jane, Mr. and Mrs. Rizzoli, Vince, Barry, Bass, and herself were all crammed in the Rizzoli's apartment to celebrate her birthday. They were all laughing and having a good time. Mr. Rizzoli was recording the festivities for God only knows what reason.
It was time for the cake to come out, and Mrs. Rizzoli was holding it. Maura watched with a smile on her face as everyone sang "Happy Birthday" to her. She could hear Frankie's voice the best, though, because he was standing behind her with his arms wrapped around her waist.
She blew out the candles and everyone cheered and clapped. Frankie held her tighter and she smiled up at him. He leaned down and kissed her, before Jane cleared her throat, signaling them to stop. They smiled at each other and Maura leaned into his embrace.
"I love you." He said and kissed her temple.
"I love you, too." She replied, a smile still on her face.
Maura shot out of her seat, knowing she couldn't fight the tears anymore and only barely registering the loud commotion she made before she ran out of the doors where the service was being held and fell to her knees outside the room.
It had finally really hit her. Frankie was gone. He was never coming back. He was never going to smile at her again, or hold her again, kiss her again, tell her he loved her again. He was just gone. She knew she'd always have him with her, but that didn't take away any of the pain. She wanted him back. Why did he go into that mission without any backup? She had warned him not to, but he went anyway.
"I just won't see why you won't wait for backup! What if you get hurt Frankie? Do you know how much it would hurt your family and me if you got hurt or killed? Why won't you wait?" Maura yelled at him in a secluded room of the police station.
"I don't have TIME to wait, Maura! Every minute I'm here, that officer is one second closer to dying. I HAVE to go, Maura, why can't you see that?" He yelled back. This was the worst fight they had ever had.
"I DO see that, I just don't see why you can't wait for backup in case something happens!" She replied.
"I just can't! I have to do this."
"Fine! GO! Do what you have to do, see if I care." Maura screamed. Frankie gave her an apologetic look before leaving.
She never had the chance to apologize for fighting with him. He was gone before she had the chance. Tears were flowing freely down her face now, her not even bothering to try to stop them. She hated herself for not apologizing. She hated herself more for not forcing him to wait. Maybe if she had, he'd still be here.
She heard someone walk out, but didn't register who it was until they were next to her. It was Jane.
"Maura… Maura I know this is hard, but we have to finish this. It's for Frankie, remember?" Jane said, her own voice filled with sadness and tears. Jane nodded and stood. Jane held out her hand and she took it, thankful for one friendly face in the crowd.
XX
After the burial service, Maura hung around after everyone else left and sat by the place his headstone would go. She had to get a few things out. She knew there was a good chance Frankie wouldn't hear her, but she had to try. She spoke to the plot of dirt as if Frankie was right there in front of her.
"Hey Frankie." She began nervously. "I want to apologize for fighting with you. I just… I wanted you to be safe, because I care about you so much. And the thought of you being in danger terrified me. But fighting about it didn't help anything, if anything it could've created a distraction.
I miss you like hell, you know. And I'm always going to love you, no matter what. I know a lot of people say that, and fall out of love with someone that has past, or just fall in love with someone else. But you know me Frankie, I don't lie. I'm going to love you until the day I die.
And, one more thing, I'm sorry I broke my promise. But losing you was one of the few things about our jobs that would affect me, no matter what. I love you too much to not be affected by it." She finished and stood up, dusting herself off. There was no sign that Frankie had heard her, but as she started walking away, she felt a light breeze and the day had been not windy at all.
She smiled, she knew it could've been a freak thing for the wind to blow right then, but she believed in her heart that Frankie had heard her. And it was enough to get her at least through the day. She just had to believe he had and have that faith.
It's how Frankie would've wanted it, anyhow.
Fin
I totally give you guys permission to kill me for killing Frankie. I didn't want to, I tried to find any way around it. But this plot bunny stuck, so I HAD to write it.
Once again dedicated to my best friend, Kristi, who's been wanting me to write another Frankie/Maura fic for awhile. I hope you liked it, dude.
It was sad to write this. It's one of the more depressing things I've written ON TOP of killing Frankie (who I love to death). But I hope it was okay. And I apologize for any OOC-ness.
Disclaimer: I don't own Rizzoli & Isles if I did, Grant would come back and have a samurai sword to the death battle with Dean for Jane's heart, with Grant winning. (inside joke between Kristi and I)
