Based on a theory on Tumblr, in which Cosima is corrupted by DYAD. Insert warning here for slight non-con in a couple places. Please direct half of your anger and pitchforks to the Australian. She's just as responsible for this as I am.
"I'll do it. I'll go." Delphine stared at her, eyes wide in shock, her jaw tight.
"Pardon?" she asked. Cosima watched her fingers dig into the arm of the sofa.
"They don't know that I know," Cosima said. "Just like how you didn't know that I knew you were monitoring me." Delphine let the air in her lungs out in a long, harsh huff, her body slouching back into the cushions with it. Her free hand rose and dug into her hair, wild and tangled from a night of working.
"You can't," the blonde said, shaking her head. Her fingers remained tangled, knuckles flexing and rolling as her frustration channelled itself into them. "It's too dangerous." Cosima shrugged, and turned away to face her computer again.
"Leekie made me an offer. I might as well use it to my advantage." She pushed her glasses up to rub at her eyes, burning with exhaustion, then bumped them gently back into place. "I can't just sit around here not doing anything and feeling useless. Besides," she turned her head, brown eyes finding Delphine's and staring, a light line between her brows, "I don't think you're in a position to tell me what I can't and can't do."
"Why can't-"
"No one else can do it, Delphine," Cosima sighed. She pushed her fingers into her temples, and squeezed her eyes shut. "The offer was for me. I can do more from the inside than I can sitting here. Tell him." Delphine paled.
"What?" Cosima gestured at the phone sitting on the table, untouched save for when Delphine had tossed it there rummaging in her bag for a tissue to clean blood from Cosima's lips.
"Tell him you've gotten me to accept his proposal." Delphine's hand shook as she reached for the phone, the soft clicking of the keys the only sound to fill the silence between them.
"It's done," Delphine said, and dropped the phone as if touching it seared her flesh. "I don't like this." Cosima shrugged again, but snaked her hand across the space separating their bodies, and touched the side of Delphine's knee.
"You don't have to like it," she said without looking up. "You just have to go along with it. I'll need you to be my cover." Delphine sighed, and shifted her leg away.
"There must be a way you can help other than walking into the lion's den," she said. Cosima looked at her, long and hard, and shook her head.
"You want me to trust you," she said. "This is what you need to do. Help me, and I promise you'll earn it back." The words hit home, she could tell by the way Delphine squeezed her eyes shut and the lines that formed on her brow. The blonde bit her lip, holding her breath. Cosima waited, watching her. Eventually, just as her face was starting to tinge red, Delphine exhaled and opened her eyes.
"I will help you," she said, "but you must tell Sarah, and Alison." Cosima nodded.
"Deal," she replied.
"I do not know how you want me to be your cover," Delphine continued. She stood, pacing away towards the kitchen. Cosima tracked her movements. The answer weighed heavily on her chest.
"By being my girlfriend," she said. Delphine leaned bodily against the sink, her head bowed. Cosima flexed her fingers. "It'll be normal for us to spend a lot of time together. Besides, you did it before. It shouldn't be too hard."
"Je faisais pas semblant," Delphine whispered. Cosima almost didn't catch it, but wouldn't have understood if Delphine had shouted it from the roof.
"What?" she asked. Delphine shook her head. Her hand found her hair again, squeezing and bunching her curls before dropping to the handle of a cabinet. She opened them methodically, searching for mugs and finding only cracked cups and wine glasses. Her hands dropped to the sink, washing the mugs that had been laid there; one for herself, and one for Cosima.
"Nothing," she finally said. "How do you take your tea?" Cosima slung an arm over the back of the sofa, turning to face Delphine fully, and cocked her head to the side.
"Black," she replied, and slowly turned back around. The kettle bubbled loudly a few minutes later. Cosima tapped absently at her keyboard, and listened to water splashing against itself and along the ceramic it was being poured into. Delphine joined her again, sitting at the edge of the sofa. "Thanks," Cosima replied. She warmed her hands against the mug given to her. Her Californian blood wasn't made for Canadian winters.
"You're welcome," Delphine said quietly. Cosima rubbed at her temple again, and looked over. Delphine, sensing her gaze, raised her head to meet it, eyes questioning.
"Well?" she asked. Delphine's eyes darted to her lips, then back up. Cosima swallowed, her throat and mouth dry.
"Is this your way of asking me out?" Delphine replied. She tried to smile, but it didn't quite reach her eyes. Cosima's twitched in return.
"Sort of." Yes, her heart screamed. Yes, yes, yes. She cleared her throat, and raised her mug to her lips to buy herself time. "It'll keep me safe." That was all that was needed. Cosima watched whatever resolve Delphine may have had crumble behind the hazel of her eyes.
"Then yes, Cosima Niehaus," she said, but she wasn't looking at her any more. "I will be your girlfriend."
Sarah wasn't very keen on the idea. She pulled Cosima aside, out of Delphine's earshot, and with a firm grip on her elbow, scowled wordlessly at her until Cosima rolled her eyes, sighed, and twisted her arm away. Paul, only just trailing inside, glanced at them, then caught sight of Delphine, and went to join her, hand outstretched. She looked like shit.
"I don't trust her, Cosima," she said softly, her voice a low growl. "She sold us out to Leekie, remember?"
"Yeah, well, she was doing it to keep me safe. She didn't know about the patent." Sarah's frown deepened. "You didn't see her face, Sarah. Trust me, she didn't know." Sarah glanced to where Delphine and Paul were quietly talking, then back at her.
"And this wasn't her idea?" she asked. Cosima shook her head.
"No. No. She didn't want me to go."
"How did you get her to agree to it, then?" She pushed air out through her nose, and pinched the bridge.
"I'm doing this for all of us, okay? I can work better from the inside. I can use their resources against them." Sarah shoved a hand through her hair. Her eyes found Delphine again, wary.
"If you think it'll help," she finally sighed, "if you can get Kira back, then all right."
"Thank you, Sarah," Cosima said, and touched her sister's arm. Sarah pulled her into a hug, tight and abrupt, and held her for a moment before letting go with a squeeze. They both cleared their throats, glancing away.
"Just be careful, okay?" Sarah said. "And keep an eye on her. I still don't trust her as far as I can throw her."
Delphine spent a fortune on flights for the both of them. They had each packed lightly; Cosima the essentials to last her through until school started up again in January, and Delphine in a rush to follow before she completely lost track of Cosima's whereabouts. Cosima said nothing on the flight. She kept her hands in her lap, and let her head rest against the wall of the airplane, looking out at the clouds that floated carelessly around them. They parted at the airport, sharing a cab inconvenient when they lived in opposite directions. Cosima felt Delphine's gaze linger as she walked away, but didn't look back, no matter how hard her heart cried.
The stillness of her apartment was welcome. Cosima sighed when she stepped over the threshold, letting her bag fall to the floor. She had time, though not much, their return flight to Toronto scheduled to leave later that night. Cosima glanced around, and lightly pushed the door shut. She'd made a home there, and the chance of her never seeing it again were high. Very high. It was a risk she had to take. She lugged her suitcase through to the bedroom, hauling it up, and paused with her hands resting on the edges when her breath came in a tight wheeze.
She hadn't coughed since the early morning, but she could feel it squeezing at her lungs, and fizzling in her chest. If one good thing was going to come out of going to DYAD, it would be having the resources necessary for her and Delphine to locate some kind of cure. Cosima pushed a hand against her sternum and carefully cleared her throat. Nothing. She might as well have had a chest cold. The threat passed, for the moment, Cosima flipped open her suitcase and bustled about her apartment, stocking up on clothes, medicine, books, everything that she suspected she might need. She imagined Delphine was doing the same. Not more than an hour passed before she was ready, sitting at her desk and waiting for the text from Delphine with the cab to take them back to the airport.
The blonde bought them dinner, and denied all of Cosima's attempts to pay for herself.
"I make more than enough to treat you to dinner," she argued. "If there is one thing DYAD has done for me, it has given me the ability to indulge while still living comfortably." Cosima didn't press the matter. Of course they paid her generously. She had never suspected any differently. She supposed she'd be privy to the same luxuries, now. Delphine's phone pinged. She paused with her fork halfway to her mouth, then very slowly lowered it back to the table and dug into her bag. Her face paled. Cosima frowned at her.
"What?" she asked. Delphine shook her head, glanced at the message on the screen, then tossed her phone away again.
"Nothing. Aldo-Leekie is very happy that you have reconsidered his offer."
"Do you always look like you've seen a ghost when he contacts you?" Cosima asked blandly.
"His advances are not as welcome as you seem to think they are," Delphine replied, her eyes on her plate. Cosima hummed. Delphine checked her watch. "We should go. Are you finished?" She hadn't had much of an appetite to begin with. Silently, she nodded, and with her carry on in her hand, followed in Delphine's wake. They didn't speak again on the flight, but with Delphine wearing headphones and doing her best to at least appear to be sleeping, any attempts Cosima could have made at conversation would have been useless.
"Miss Niehaus, Dr. Cormier, my name is Daniel. Miss Duncan sent me to see you to your new apartment." He looked like the kind of lackey Rachel would have. Cosima tried not to eye him too warily, and shook his hand despite not wanting to touch him at all. It was brief, at least, and all he did was nod at Delphine before turning on his heel and leaving them to follow after him. There was a car waiting; a black stretch with tinted windows. The back proved spacious when Daniel opened the door for them. They let the driver load their luggage, and Cosima waited for Delphine to slip inside before sliding in next to her. She kept the space on the seat between them, and with the closing of the door, the thick silence settled over them again.
Much to Cosima's relief, the ride was short, and Daniel was nothing more than a silent guide. She fidgeted in the elevator that took them up, and up, and up, until Cosima was sure they wouldn't stop until they were at the very stop of the building, but stop they did, and Daniel gestured for them to step out of the lift before following. DYAD certainly treated their employees well, Cosima thought, hesitating at the threshold. Delphine strode in like it was nothing new to her, but everything from the furniture to the rugs, and the expensive entertainment system, and shiny, chrome filled kitchen almost managed to deprive Cosima of oxygen.
"You'll find the pantry fully stocked," Daniel said. "I'll be here at seven tomorrow to collect you and take you to the office." He left. Cosima shut the door on him, and leaned against it. Delphine looked around once, then made a beeline for what Cosima assumed was one of the bedrooms. She followed, curious. From what she could tell, there weren't any other doors leading away from the main room, just one.
"Cosima," Delphine called, her voice tight. Cosima peered over her shoulder.
"Oh," she breathed, her chest clenching. One bed. More than large enough for the both of them to be sure, but only one bed. "Shit."
"Yes," Delphine replied. Cosima sighed. She wondered, briefly, if they had done it on purpose. If it had all be some sort of plot to test the two of them. If it was, she wasn't a test she was going to fail. Delphine seemed to have come to the same conclusion.
"I'll sleep on the right," Cosima said, just as Delphine echoed her words. The blonde flushed, looking at the floor. "Do you want the-I don't care what side I sleep on, really."
"No," Delphine said with a shake of her head. "No, no, it's fine. You pick what side you like. I will take the other." Cosima cleared her throat.
"I'll sleep on the right, then," she said. "I like being close to the windows." Delphine sighed, so softly that Cosima's ears strained to hear it.
"I'll start to unpack. Would you like something to eat?"
"No," Cosima replied. "I'm not very hungry." Delphine's gaze met her own, and softened.
"You should eat something, chérie." Cosima sighed. She was right of course, and if they were going to pretend to be girlfriends, she might as well start to act like they were. The place was probably bugged. She reached out, and slowly squeezed Delphine's hand.
Cosima had a surprisingly easy time falling asleep considering that she was sharing her bed with the woman she wasn't sure if she loved or hated, and certainly didn't trust. At least she didn't think so. Maybe she did. She had to, at least some, to tell her that she was sick, when she still hadn't said a word to Sarah about it. They both stayed well on their own sides, at least, the space between them feeling more like a chasm than a couple feet. In her dreams, they were happy, and laughing, and no one was sick and Kira was safe and sound.
She woke with warmth pressed against her, and the familiar scent of soap and traces of perfume and shampoo tickling her nose. Cosima inhaled reflexively. Maybe she was still dreaming. She had to be. She opened her eyes. It was still dark in the room. Slowly her vision adjusted, and she realized that she definitely wasn't dreaming. Delphine's breath was warm against her collarbone, brushing against it in deep, soft, even blows. Oh, Cosima thought, but her body wouldn't let her pull away. It was too enamoured by the familiar shape of Delphine's body. What did it matter? She could allow herself this, even if it was only for a little while. Cosima tightened the grip she had on Delphine's waist, and closed her eyes again.
The alarm clock on the night stand blared, and with it the peace was shattered. Delphine jolted against her, startled by the sudden noise, and inhaled sharply. Cosima rolled over and smacked her hand against the clock until the noise stopped, and sighed into the quiet that followed. All of the tension from the night before returned, and doubled. She listened the sheets shift as Delphine moved away from her.
"I'm sorry," the blonde said, her voice rough and low from sleep. "I didn't- I'm sorry."
"It's okay," Cosima said, startled by how husky her own voice was. "I guess that's our sign to get up."
"I am going to have a shower," Delphine mumbled, and rolled over and out of bed.
"I'll make coffee," Cosima replied, too late for Delphine to hear. She laid in bed until she heard the muffled rush of the shower, then spurred herself into action. The cabinets were as full as Daniel had promised. Cosima rifled through the contents until she found the coffee, and read the blurbs on the back and sides absently while she fiddle with the maker, and waited for it to brew. Delphine was finished by the time it was done, dressed and ready.
"The shower is lovely," she commented. "I could stay in there all morning." She offered Cosima a smile, but it didn't do much to diffuse the tight air surrounding them.
"Coffee's good, too," she offered, uselessly. "Guess it's my turn." It was as nice as Delphine had said. Cosima would have spent the entire morning in it, and happily so. She spent a good five minutes trying to figure out how to switch cycles, but it was worth it for the pounding of hot water against her muscles, relaxing them bit by bit until a knock on the door brought all of it back.
"Cosima, we'll be leaving soon," Delphine said, her voice muffled by the door and the roar of the water in Cosima's ears. Cosima sighed, and called out her assent. She withdrew from the shower with reluctance, and with a practised ease, was ready five minutes before Daniel came knocking at their front door.
He was waiting with a limo again. Silent as always, he led them downstairs, opened the door for them, and left them alone in the back. Delphine turned her head away and stared out the window, her hand lingering by her chin. Her fingers twitched, as if she wanted to bite her nails and was trying very hard to keep herself from doing so. Cosima watched her a while, frowning lightly. She glanced through the open divider to the driver.
"Are you okay?" she asked softly. Delphine turned her head to look at her.
"Yes," she said. "I'm fine." Her head rotated again, but her eyes remained. "Are you?" Cosima's eyes flicked to the front of the car again. Wordlessly, she reached across the space between them for Delphine's hand, and easily slipped her fingers into the spaces between the blonde's own. She was terrified. She was the one walking into the jaws of the wolf, not Delphine. Her very existence was on the line. At least Delphine's body was her own to do with what she wanted. Even Cosima's atoms technically belonged to DYAD. She squeezed the warm fingers twined with her own for comfort.
From the outside, DYAD looked like any other building in the city. There were no markings to differentiate it, just a stream of men and women in suits blending in with dozens of others who looked the same, walking in and out of rotating doors, checking watches, talking on cell phones. Daniel opened the door for them, but didn't follow them. Cosima hovered at Delphine's ease, envying the ease with which the blonde passed inside. She had hoped Delphine would feel just as much as a stranger as she did, but it was foolish.
"Where should we go?" she asked. Delphine glanced around and shrugged.
"I don't know," she replied. "There are many labs. My office, maybe. I expected someone to be here to meet us-oh."
"What?" Cosima asked, following Delphine's gaze until they landed on the last man she wanted to see. Aldous spotted them from across the foyer, and with a smile that made Cosima's skin crawl, crossed the distance in a few easy strides and pulled Delphine from Cosima's side and into a hug. The blonde stiffened for the few seconds that it lasted. Cosima frowned lightly.
"Cosima," he said, one hand on her shoulder and the other reaching for hers to shake it. She fought to not recoil at the touch. "May I say personally how delighted I am that you decided to accept my offer. You'll find that conducting your research here at the institute will open your eyes to hundred of possibilities, and of course, provide you access to the records you need to examine the biology of yourself and of your sisters." Cosima forced a smile, dropping her hand away and lightly shrugging off his grip. He drew passes from his shirt pocket, and held them out. "Delphine, you'll find your security clearance has been upgraded. Cosima, yours is the same." He swept his arm towards the line of elevators. "Shall we?" Cosima's fingers itched to reach out for Delphine's. She shoved her hands into the pockets of her coat instead.
"It's okay," Delphine said under her breath with a quick glance. Leekie thumbed the button for their floor, and stepped back with his hands clasped behind his back.
"I trust you two are settling in okay?" he asked. "I'm sorry there's only one bed. I tried to negotiate for another flat, but this was the only one available that suited our needs. I hope it isn't a problem?" Cosima scowled, her jaw tight.
"It isn't," she said firmly. Delphine glanced at her again, teeth digging into her lip. Cosima reached for her hand, and held it tightly. She didn't care who saw. It was all part of the plan, and it wasn't exactly hard for her to pretend, as much as she wanted it to be.
"Good," Leekie replied, entirely too cheerfully for Cosima's liking. She squeezed Delphine's fingers. The blonde returned it weakly. The elevator dinged, and the doors smoothly slid open. Cosima found herself staring at her own face. "Rachel?" Leekie asked. "What are you doing here?"
"A word, Aldous," Rachel replied. Her voice and accent was smooth and firm, so unlike Sarah's brusque, rough dialect. Leekie's frown of displeasure made Cosima's jaw set, but Delphine's hand in hers was a warm reassurance. She glanced at the blonde's face as Rachel and Leekie stepped to the side, leading them into the hall before the doors on the lift could shut them in. She looked shocked; almost alarmed.
"You didn't know?" Cosima asked. Delphine slowly shook her head.
"I knew of her," she replied. "Aldous spoke of her, but I did not know she is..."
"A clone," Cosima finished. "Yeah."
"Did you?" Delphine asked, looking at her now instead of the two standing out of earshot.
"Yeah," Cosima repeated, "but that doesn't make it any less weird."
Aldous was less than pleased. Truthfully, Rachel didn't care if he was happy or not; it was her "sister," and her lovely blonde companion that was Rachel's primary concern. Aldous asked her again what she was doing. She supposed she should have mentioned something to him, but it had seemed better to go about it in a way that would prove that she was unexpected; someone to be respected, and feared.
"I've been watching, Aldous," Rachel said, breaking him off mid-sentence. "Your presence consistently makes these women uncomfortable, and I'm afraid I cannot allow that to continue."
"What?" Aldous asked.
"You'll be assigned to a different project; there will be an email with details awaiting you shortly." Rachel glanced away, watching the two women down the hall. Cosima was gesturing wildly with her arms, mouth a blur of movement as she spoke to a startled Delphine. The blonde eventually reached up and grabbed Cosima's arms, then her hands, said something Rachel couldn't read to her, and Cosima calmed, although only marginally.
"You can't do that," she heard Aldous say, his voice and presence no more than an annoyance to her.
"I believe you'll find I just did," she replied without looking at him. "You are to leave these women alone, and forget any conceptions you may still keep about your relationship with our good doctor." She did look at him then, a carefully practised, barely there smile on her face. "She is obviously not your toy any more." Aldous opened his mouth to retort, but a sharp look from Rachel silenced him. "If you'll excuse us," she continued, and motioned towards the lifts. Aldous' jaw twitched in annoyance, but he had no choice other than to obey. When the doors slid shut on him, Rachel smoothed her skirt, and gathered herself with a breath, then strode down the hall. "Follow me, if you would." Rachel strode past the confused women without a passing glance, the click of their shoes against the white tiles the only sign that they had complied with her order. She stopped at the last door on the left, casually twisting the handle and letting it swing open.
"Woah," Cosima whispered. A glance over her shoulder revealed a look of wonder lighted on her clone's face. The doctor looked less than impressed. Unperturbed, Cosima stepped past them both and made a beeline for the aquarium that took up the entirety of the right hand wall, dividing the office they were stood in from the lab on the other side, only broken by a door in the centre.
"Yes, I thought you would like that," Rachel said, watching as Cosima all but pressed her face against the glass. "We find it brings relaxation to what can be a very stressful workplace, and relaxed employees are happy employees, and therefore more productive, and greater productivity helps all, does it not, Dr. Cormier?" Delphine stared at her, her eyes searching, and hummed softly.
"Yes," she said.
"You'll find the lab beyond that stocked with the finest equipment available," Rachel continued, crossing to the small bar in the far corner. "Drinks?" She didn't wait for a reply, pouring champagne for the three of them and all but forcing one of the glasses into Delphine's hands with a smile that tinged on cold. Cosima accepted it without a fuss, her eyes darting this way and that as she took in their surroundings. Her amazed expression was perfect. Rachel contained a smirk. "A toast," she announced, holding up her glass, "to welcoming two of the brightest scientists this company has ever seen. Cheers."
"Cheers!" Cosima announced happily. Delphine paused, watching Rachel carefully, before muttering a "cheers" under her breath, and sipping at her drink like it was liquid poison. Over the rim of her glass, Rachel observed them; the way Delphine's gaze, laced with concern, flicked between Cosima and herself, the way Cosima's eyes still travelled around the room, how her wandering took her closer and closer to the door to the lab.
"If you're curious," Rachel said, setting her glass down on the desk, "then by all means, have a look." She headed for the door, lightly brushing past Delphine. "Oh, and if either of you need anything," she said, with her hand against the latch, "don't hesitate to come to me directly. If it's within my power to grant, you shall have it." And with that she left, a satisfied smirk curling on her face as she strode confidently down the hall, the click of her heels echoing off the stark walls.
Cosima and her drink disappeared into the joining room. Delphine was unimpressed by all the flair. She had behaved much like Cosima had on her initial arrival, but months of working and the past few weeks especially had eroded her excitement. The charm would wear off, she thought, discarding her champagne. She hardly had any taste for it, as expensive as it was. Not when it was provided by DYAD. She glanced around. The office was posh indeed; certainly nicer than her old one had been.
"Delphine, this place is amazing," Cosima called, her voice drifting through the open door from the lab. "This equipment, a lot of this hasn't even hit the market yet."
"Yes," Delphine replied. "You'll find that true of many things here."
"Could you sound any less impressed?" Cosima asked, joining her again. "I know they're the bad guys and all, but you can't deny that they treat their people well." Too well, Delphine thought with a scowl.
"We have a lot of work to do, Cosima," she said, shrugging off her coat and draping it over the back of one of the chairs in the middle of the room. "We should get started."
"Yeah," Cosima replied, dreamily, then shook her head, as if to gather her thoughts, and suddenly the Cosima Delphine recognized was back, determination etched into her face. "Yeah, right. Let's see what exactly they're allowing us to access."
"Be careful," Delphine said softly, bending close to Cosima's ear. "They are watching, they must be." Cosima rolled her eyes, and seated herself behind the desk.
"Yeah, no shit," she said with a quick glance up. "Don't worry, I'm a lot better at covering my tracks than you are." The words, and the hidden accusation that they brought, stung, but Delphine brushed it away.
"I suppose I had better get to work, then," Delphine said, but Cosima appeared to have not heard, already frowning with concentration at the computer monitor.
In the lab, at least, she could pretend. It was nicer than the one at Minnesota had been, but a lab was a lab, and she felt at home within its white and silver confines. There were samples already waiting, ones from all the known subjects. Delphine stared at the neatly labelled tubes with disdain. It felt dirty to touch what had been forcibly taken from innocent women in their sleep, but she had no other choice, unless she wished to stride back into the office with a needle and demand Cosima fill another vial with her blood. She didn't, couldn't, not unless she needed to, and so with a heavy sigh and a trembling hand, Delphine picked up the vial marked 324B21, and began her work.
Cosima had access to more than she'd expected she would. Someone must have given her the benefit of the doubt. Probably Rachel, she mused, clicking through the documents, reports, charts, x-rays and more loaded onto the hard drive on the computer. But still, of course, nothing on Kira, and nothing that could help Delphine in her search for a cure. She took the laptop laying on the coffee table home with her, surprised when no one stopped them on their way out and demanded it back. She doubted there would be anything of any value on it, but it was worth a try.
Delphine cooked while she looked through, trying to find some way that she could remotely hack into DYAD's servers and obtain the more sensitive information that she knew Rachel was hiding. Delphine served her a plate at the desk, then left to sit on the sofa. Cosima looked at the plate, then over the top of the laptop at the blonde, then shut the lid and joined her. She settled, reached for the remote, and found something that they could both enjoy before placing a gentle kiss on Delphine's cheek. The blonde blushed.
"What are you doing?" she asked.
"You're my girlfriend, remember?" Cosima replied, leaning back into the cushions. At the corner of her eye, she caught a smile twitching at the corner of Delphine's lips, and her heart flipped when it spread into a real one, even if it was all pretend. Mostly pretend.
She woke up with Delphine in her arms again, but despite the weekend meaning there would be no alarm to rudely split them apart, her body wasn't as kind. Everything built up over the night manifested itself in a tightness in her chest and a tickling in her lungs that pulled her from the comfort and warmth of the body against hers into the bathroom to clear her throat until her lungs seized and blood filled her mouth. She spat into the sink, and stared at the crimson stain stark against the white porcelain before turning on the tap and washing it away, bending her head to clean her mouth.
Thankfully, her short fit hadn't disturbed Delphine, the blonde now occupying the space that Cosima had vacated. Cosima lingered between the bedroom and the bathroom before fetching her robe from the back of the chair and leaving Delphine to sleep a while longer. She made coffee, shooting the laptop on the desk sidelong glances. Her shoulders prickled. Instinctively, Cosima looked behind her, but of course there was nothing. With a shudder, she rubbed her arms and fetched a mug.
Delphine woke soon after, shuffling out in her vest top and shorts and rubbing at her eyes. Cosima turned to meet her, leaning one arm along the back of the sofa. When Delphine spotted her she froze, glancing down at the amount of bare skin she'd left on display, and for a few seconds looking like a deer in headlights until Cosima smiled at her, and held up her mug.
"There's plenty left," she said.
"Thank you," Delphine replied quietly. Cosima turned back around and listened to the sounds drifting from the kitchen, hovering under the noise from the TV. "I was thinking of going in today, if that's all right." Cosima tipped her head back.
"Really? You don't want to just... chill? A lot's happened in a really short amount of time. I don't know about you, but my head feels like it's going to explode." She only just caught Delphine's shrug.
"I can't 'chill', Cosima. I have a lot of work ahead of me, and as much as I loathe having to use them to do it, I don't have any other choice." The blonde sat close to her, slouching down and bending her knees to prop her feet against the edge of the table. She held her mug near her chin.
"I guess I'll try to get some work done, too." Delphine didn't reply. She steadily drank her coffee, and when it was finished, stood with a stretch. Cosima turned her empty mug in her hands, watching her until she was out of sight.
"I'll see you tonight, Cosima," Delphine said before she left. Cosima's reply was lost in the shutting of the door behind her. She sighed, rubbing her eyes beneath her glasses, then practically dropped her cup onto the table and rose to fetch her own laptop from the bedroom. When she settled again, with the drive containing the version of her genetic code that Leekie had gave her, she pulled up the un-tampered one, and the DNA results she'd managed to pull from Katja's blood, and began to study.
It was dark before Delphine returned, looking exhausted when she opened the door. Cosima only caught a glimpse of it before she composed herself, and offered her a smile.
"Hey," she greeted, returning it. Delphine dropped her bag and shrugged off her coat, shoving a hand through her hair and inhaling deeply before she spoke.
"Hi." She hovered by the door, hands on her hips, then shook her head lightly with a soft sigh. "I'm going to have a shower," she announced.
"Yeah, okay," Cosima replied. "I'll make dinner, then."
She looked refreshed when she re-entered the living room, her hair damply curling against the tops of her shoulders. When she passed by Cosima on her way to the sofa, she paused to kiss her temple. Cosima knew she was trying to make it look casual, but her fingers trembled where they rested on Cosima's arm, and her posture was stiff and careful. It made Cosima blush, regardless. She blamed it on the heat from the stove.
She pulled Delphine to her that night as she was falling asleep. Her arms ached to hold the blonde, and she was too tired, too out of it, to deny them. Delphine rolled easily against her, already further into slumber than Cosima was, and pressed her face against Cosima's collarbone with a light sigh. She followed Delphine to sleep, inhaling the scent of her shampoo. Neither of them had moved when the sunlight filtering through the window stirred Cosima awake. If anything, they'd gotten closer. Delphine's leg definitely hadn't been there before.
Cosima tightened her grip, but her mind started to pull away. This was the opposite of what she was supposed to be doing. She'd fallen for Delphine once already and it had ended badly. Surely, surely, she wasn't so foolish as to make the same mistake twice. Or maybe she was. Rays of light from outside glowed on Delphine's skin and in her hair, softening the lines of stress that had been tightening her mouth and eyes. Cosima reached up, and let her fingers slip through Delphine's golden curls.
Delphine stirred, and still Cosima held on. The blonde's hand found her hip, then her side, then wrapped around her back, pulling their bodies more snugly together. Her breathing shifted as she woke, and Cosima felt her eyelashes flutter against her skin. She squeezed, the pulled back so she could meet Cosima's gaze, and smiled at her as she squinted into the morning light.
"Are you hungry?" Cosima asked. Delphine shook her head.
"No. Are you?"
"No."
"I should have a shower," Delphine said. Cosima hesitated, watching how the light made Delphine's eyes glow.
"Okay. There'll be coffee when you get out." Delphine smiled, and slowly untangled her limbs. Cosima relaxed into the bed and watched the bathroom door shut behind her.
She had her laptop open when Delphine finished, emerging from the bedroom dressed for the day, leaving Cosima feeling lazy for having done nothing but put on pants to combat the slight chill in the apartment.
"Hey," she called over her shoulder, "I'm about to call Sarah. Do you want to join?"
"No," Delphine replied after a pause, with an apologetic smile. She wrapped her scarf around her neck. "I was going to go pick up a few things from the grocery store. Is there anything you need?"
"We don't need food?" Cosima said, frowning.
"No," Delphine agreed, "but there are certain comforts that this kitchen is lacking. If we're going to live here, I would prefer if it felt at least a bit more like home."
"No," Cosima said. "I don't need anything." Delphine hoisted her bag onto her shoulder.
"Well, if you think of something..."
"I'll text. Yeah." Delphine's smile grew awkward, and she slipped out the door. It clicked softly behind her. Cosima popped her earbuds in. The dull Skype tone filled her hearing a few seconds later until Sarah picked up the other end. Cosima could see the bags under her eyes. As the audio kicked in, she caught Felix's voice just before the door to his loft slid shut. Sarah sighed and pushed her fingers into her temples.
"Please tell me you have some good news," she said without looking up. Cosima grimaced.
"I wish I could," she said softly. "Are you okay?" Sarah raised her head.
"Do I look okay to you?"
"Right, yeah, stupid question. Sorry."
"How's Delphine then?" Sarah sighed, settling back in the chair.
"She's fine," Cosima said. "We're fine."
"That counts as good news."
"What about on your end? Anything new?" Sarah shook her head. Her voice was tight when she replied.
"Paul and Art are looking into some leads, but nothing concrete. Not yet. I know she's alive, though, Cos. I can feel it."
"Of course she is," Cosima replied, as comfortingly as she could managed. "I'll let you know if there's any change, okay?" Sarah nodded.
"Going so soon?" she asked, with only a trace of sarcasm.
"Yeah. Have to be careful."
"All right, well... try not to get yourself killed or anything." Cosima laughed lightly.
"I'm fine. Bye then." Sarah waved silently, and shut her computer lid, ending the call. Cosima tugged her earbuds out and shifted her laptop onto her legs, sinking back into the sofa and picking up where she'd left off the previous night, manually copying over any files she thought might be useful from DYAD's computer to her own. She was still working when Delphine returned, shouldering the door open.
"How is Sarah?" she asked, and kicked the door shut with her heel. Cosima rose to help with the bags.
"How you'd expect," she replied. "Not much different." Delphine hummed, then stopped with her hands against the counter, as if bracing herself for a blow.
"I didn't say anything," she said. Cosima paused, her hand halfway to a cabinet door. She lowered it slowly, and put down the can of food she was holding. Delphine turned her head to look at her when she didn't reply, her eyes almost pleading. "I swear."
"I know," Cosima said weakly. "I know you didn't."
"I don't know how they found out."
"I know." She reached out, taking Delphine's hand in her own. "Delphine, I know." The blonde squeezed her eyes shut, then nodded quickly. She sniffed lightly, pulling her hand away. "Are you okay?"
"I'm fine."
"How about I find a movie or something for us to watch? We can both take a break for a couple hours. It won't hurt us." Delphine nodded again.
"Yes," she said. "Yes. That sounds lovely. Let me just... put these away, yes?"
"Do you want me to help?" Cosima asked.
"No," Delphine said. The inhale that followed was shaky, but then she straightened up and her shoulders relaxed.
"Only a couple hours," Cosima repeated. She let her fingers touch the small of Delphine's back as she stepped past. Delphine settled next to her a few minutes later, with her coat carelessly tossed on the armchair with her boots at its feet. She curled into herself, drawing her legs up to her chest. Cosima knew she wasn't okay, but she refused to press. If Delphine wanted to tell her, she would.
An hour into the movie, Delphine stood to use the bathroom. She didn't make it past the couch before she squealed and darted back onto it. Cosima jumped and swore loudly, watching as the blonde pointed at a spider scurrying on its merry way across the floor towards the bedroom.
"Cosima!" the blonde hissed.
"What?" Cosima replied, glancing at her. "What? When did I get put on spider duty?"
"Just get it out of our bedroom!" Cosima grinned before she could stop herself. Their bedroom. But then Delphine squeaked again.
"Okay, okay," she said, clambering over the back of the couch towards the bedroom. "Delphine, where did it go?" The blonde pointed again. "What are you pointing at? Would you just come here, already!?" Delphine pouted, then slowly joined her, standing behind her with her hands on Cosima's shoulders as if she was a shield. "You know, this would work better if you weren't so much taller than me. I'm not sure what you expect me to be able to protect you from."
"It will touch you first," Delphine said into her ear. Cosima rolled her eyes, looking around the floor.
"You know it's more scared of you than you are of it, right," she said. Delphine's fingers flexed against her shoulders. She kicked over one of her jumpers with her foot, and the spider scuttled across the floor. Cosima jumped back and swore. Delphine screeched in her ear, and in a matter of seconds went from behind Cosima to standing on the bed, pointing again.
"Please kill it, Cosima," Delphine said.
"I can't just kill it, Delphine," Cosima argued. "It's scared. We'll just put him back outside."
"You mean you will put it back outside, I am not touching it!"
"Fine, fine," Cosima grumbled, rolling her eyes. "Keep an eye on it."
"Where are you going?" Delphine asked, panicked.
"Getting a container. I'm not just going to pick it up with my bare hands." She returned a few seconds later, with the spider thankfully still in the same place at the seam between the wall and the floor. Cosima approached slowly, and smacked the container of it before it could move, carefully wiggling the top on. "There," she said triumphantly. She smiled at Delphine, who was still staring in horror at the spider. "Are you going to get down?"
"Not until it's gone," Delphine said. Cosima sighed.
"Okay, I'll be right back." She left Delphine awkwardly shifting her weight on the mattress and stepped out of the apartment, shivering in the cold of the hallway. The spider hadn't moved, cowering in the corner of the container still as a statue. Cosima glanced at it and forced herself to not shudder. She didn't like spiders any more than Delphine did. Okay, maybe a bit more than she did, but she was hardly excited about them. "How did you even get up here?" she asked, shaking her head as she stepped out of the lift and ignored the strange look from the staff as she shuffled quickly out the door and deposited the spider on the sidewalk.
Delphine was still standing on the bed when she got back. Cosima smiled despite herself and laughed gently, tossing the container into the sink.
"Now will you get down?" she asked, stood in the doorway. Delphine bit her lip, her fingers flexing into fists at her sides, then relaxing.
"What if there are more?" she asked.
"Then I'll take them outside, too," Cosima replied, and crossed to the bedside. She held out her hand. Delphine took it gently, allowing Cosima to help her down. "It's okay. It was just a bug, and it's gone now. I'm here, okay?" Delphine's hug caught her off guard, tight and warm. Cosima let her eyes drift shut and eagerly returned it, wrapping her arms around the blonde's waist and squeezing. The embrace lingered longer than it should have, and Delphine's hands ghosted on her neck and rested when she pulled back. Cosima met her gaze, paralysed like she had been before, unable to turn her head away when Delphine leaned in and kissed her gently. She didn't want to. Her grip tightened. Then, Delphine inhaled sharply, and tilted her head away.
"I'm sorry," she said softly, but didn't step away. Cosima inhaled, keeping her eyes closed.
"Don't be," she replied, and found the blonde's lips again. The movie was long over by the time they parted, lips swollen. Cosima's body ached for the one lined along hers, but Delphine pulled away with dark eyes, and bit her lip, before retreating to the bathroom and leaving Cosima standing alone in the middle of their room.
Cosima spun idly in her chair, watching the room swirl together in a blur of white and silver, punctuated occasionally by the gold of Delphine's hair from where she was sat a few feet away, peering into a microscope at a slide that held either Cosima's or one of the other's blood on it. There wasn't anything she could do to help. The one suggestion she had and been one of the first things Delphine had tried, with no success, and she'd been through all the files on the computers over the weekend. All she could do was sit and be bored and wait until Delphine asked for her help or for another sample of DNA. She used the desk to push her around again, her head starting to swim. The chair spun once, twice, and then suddenly there was a flash of blue in the doorway. Cosima reached out to grab the desk and stop her twirling, face red with embarrassment. Rachel smiled lightly at her. Delphine glanced over her shoulder.
"May I have you for a moment, Miss Niehaus?" she asked. Cosima cleared her throat softly, and put down the pen in her hand.
"Uh, yeah," she replied. "Sure." She glanced back at Delphine, offering the blonde a smile to try and ease the concern creasing her face, and followed Rachel into the office, shutting the door behind her. Rachel settled in one of the chairs and gestured for Cosima to do the same. She was smiling, but something about it made the hair on the back of Cosima's neck stand on end.
"Now, Miss Niehaus, I-"
"Cosima," Cosima interrupted, smiling. "Just, Cosima."
"Cosima," Rachel repeated, tilting her head to the side. Cosima tried to not squirm under her gaze. "Well then, Cosima," she continued, crossing one leg over the other. "I know it's only been a few days, but I wanted to have a little chat about how you're settling in. Aldous can be severely lacking in tact, I know, and I understand you not wanting to be honest with him about your new flat, but is everything acceptable?"
"Yeah," Cosima said, nodding. "Totally. It's really lovely, really comfortable. I've never lived in such a nice place before."
"I'm very glad to hear that," Rachel said, and again she smiled in her odd way. "Expect more in the future. I can assure you that I will do anything I possibly can to make sure you and Dr. Cormier are kept in complete comfort. Trust me when I say that it's a remarkable place to be." Cosima hummed. "And professionally? How are you finding it here?"
"The lab is... amazing, seriously. I couldn't have asked for more." Rachel's eyes flicked casually over her.
"And you?"
"...what about me?"
"How is the progress towards a cure for your... condition coming. Dr. Cormier was here on Saturday; shall I take that as a sign of progress? Any strong leads?" Cosima shrugged, and frowned.
"We're trying," she said.
"It isn't just you and I that are in danger, Cosima, all of us are. This disease could appear at any time, and we need to be ready for it."
"I know," Cosima sighed. "Delphine's been great, she is great, I mean, immunology is what she's good at, and she's really super patient with me, but she's the doctor here, not me, and I think I'm just annoying her more than offering any actual help." What was she saying? Rachel was the enemy. But she's one of us, a voice in the back of her mind whispered. She has to care. She shut her mouth before she could say that she always felt two steps behind, with anything she could think of to try Delphine already having done. Rachel smoothed her skirt, echoing Cosima's earlier hum.
"I see," she said. "A moment." She stood, crossing to the desk, and picking up the phone. "Yes, this is Rachel Duncan. I need any and all of our projects concerning evolutionary development to be redirected to Miss Niehaus. She has the proper clearance, I fail to see the issue... Wonderful, please send all relevant samples and files to Lab 17. No, she will be leading the project now." Cosima paled. "She will contact you if she requires aid." She hung up, and turned back to Cosima, a half smile on her face. Her walk was more a saunter than a stride. "Sorted, then."
"I-oh," Cosima said. "Project lead?" Cosima got to her feet as Rachel passed. Rachel extended her hand. Her grip lingered, even after Cosima loosened her fingers. She felt like the other woman was sizing her up, like she was some sort of challenger come to try and take her place. Finally, her hand dropped.
"I have every faith in you, Mis-Cosima," she said, and turned for the door.
"Rachel," she said, before the other woman's hand hit the door. "Thanks." Rachel's answer smile was almost genuine.
"It's my pleasure," she replied, and left. Cosima released a breath she hadn't realized she'd been holding and brushed her hand across her brow.
"Shit," she muttered. She waited until her head had cleared before returning to the lab. Delphine looked up the second the door opened, and was out of her seat and at Cosima's side, hands lightly touching her arms.
"Are you okay?" she asked, her brows furrowed deeply. "What happened?"
"Yeah, I'm fine," Cosima replied, finding her hands and squeezing them quickly. "It went really well, actually."
"What did she say?"
"She just wanted to check up on us," Cosima replied. "See how we're settling in, ask about how our work is progressing. She's not so bad." Delphine's fingers fell away from hers, her eyes narrowing. "She, uh, she made me a project lead."
"What?" Delphine asked.
"You should be happy," Cosima replied with a light frown. "This is going to help us."
"I am happy," Delphine said, but her voice and eyes betrayed her words.
"Whatever," Cosima replied. "It's done now. We're just going to have to deal with it."
Cosima was excelling, and Delphine didn't envy her her success; she deserved it more than anyone Delphine knew, but it threw into stark relief her own failures in finding a cure. Eight hour days turned into ten hour days. She reran tests she'd already run a dozen times, in hopes that there was something she had overlooked. Her work bled into their home life, leaving her hunched over the coffee table with her chin in her hand while Cosima cooked them dinner. The brunette's hands on her shoulders startled her out of a trance spent staring at the computer screen in front of her until the words and pictures on the screen blurred. Cosima's fingers flexed, pushing into her tense muscles.
"Hey," she said, her breath tickling Delphine's ear. "Stop working. Go take a shower, relax. Dinner will be done when you finish." Delphine sighed and leaned into her touch, turning her head to the side for a kiss without a second though. She stiffened, but when Cosima didn't pull away, she raised her hand and touched her fingertips to the brunette's cheek. "Go shower," Cosima muttered against her lips, and with a final peck, removed her hands and left her side. Delphine stayed slouched against the sofa for a few seconds longer before she gently closed her laptop lid and rose with a wince and a sharp inhale.
Hot water pounding against her skin did her a world of good. Delphine leaned heavily against the wall, closing her eyes and letting the steam swirl around her, and the water burn her skin until it was red and raw. It battered the stress out of her muscles until she felt like her whole body was made of jelly. Her legs were wobbly when she finally stepped out, wrapping one of the soft, fluffy towels around her, warmed by the air in the room. Cosima entered the bedroom just as she did, and blushed when they caught sight of each other.
"Sorry," she said, but didn't look away. "You were in there a while, I just wanted to make sure you didn't like, pass out or something. You okay?" Delphine nodded, biting her lip. "Okay, well, dinner's done, so. I'll put the TV on?"
"Yes, thank you." Cosima smiled at her, and ducked out of the room. Delphine's shoulder slumped. She passed a hand over her eyes with a sigh, and stifled a yawn. Her pyjamas were cold against her skin, still heated from the shower. Cosima was lounging on the sofa when she emerged, her feet up on the table with Delphine's plate next to them, her own in her lap.
They ate in silence. Cosima set their plates aside and shifted until she was comfortable again before lifting her arm and raising a brow in question. Delphine considered her for a moment that felt so long she was afraid Cosima would pull away before she could respond, but she didn't, and then gratefully sank against her, pillowing her head on the brunette's chest. Cosima's fingers found her hair, tangling and stroking, until Delphine found herself unable to keep her eyes open.
An abrupt cough from Cosima woke her some time later, her head jerking up. Her heart lodged itself in her throat. She reached for the brunette, but Cosima waved her away, covering her mouth with her hand.
"I'm fine," she said, after a moment, her voice raspy.
"Are you sure?" Delphine asked. Gently, she guided Cosima's fingers away, checking them without a thought.
"Yeah, I'm fine. See? No blood. This time." Delphine sighed, and lightly kissed Cosima's palm. The brunette copied her.
"Have I overstepped?" Delphine asked quietly. Cosima shook her head.
"No. Of course not. You're my girlfriend, remember?"
"I thought were were pretending," Delphine muttered. She could hear the gears in Cosima's head turning, as they always were.
"Not all of it," the brunette whispered.
"Cosima, I-"
"Don't. Please." Her face was pained. "I can't hear it right now." Delphine's chest squeezed around her heart. She lowered her head back down to Cosima's chest, and trained her eyes on the television again. She tried to relax, but the tension in Cosima's body kept her from it, though a hand eventually wound its way back into her hair.
Cosima's arms were open to her that night. Delphine fell into them, surrounding herself with everything that Cosima was; her touch, her warmth, her scent. Maybe it wasn't completely pretend after all.
Cosima made progress far more quickly than she did. When her excited shout drifted through the open door between the lab and the office, Delphine thought she'd found something hinting at where Kira was being kept, and called to her to ask, watching Cosima through the fish tank.
"No," Cosima shouted back. "No, it's something with my project. This is going to jump us forward a year!" Delphine frowned. Us? She bit her lip, and pushed away from her desk to peek into the office. Cosima grinned up at her, all teeth with her tongue pressed to the back and her eyes shining.
"We're supposed to be looking for Kira," Delphine reminded her gently. Cosima's hand reached for the phone, attention already diverted.
"I know. I am, but I can't just ignore my work. I gotta tell Rachel." Delphine's chest tightened. She curled her arms over it with a light frown, and leaned against the door frame, watching as Rachel became the reason Cosima's eyes glowed with happiness and pride. Cosima hung up after a moment, and her gaze rose to find Delphine again. "Are you okay?" Delphine nodded.
"Yes." Cosima stood, looping around the desk to stand before her hand pry her hands away from her body. Her smile was gently, kind; full of an affection that made it hard to breathe.
"Let's go out for dinner tonight," Cosima said. "Somewhere nice."
"Cosima..."
"What?" the brunette asked, her grin spreading. "It's not like we can't afford it." Delphine allowed herself to return Cosima's smile, and let the brunette's hands smooth away the tension in her shoulders. "I'll find a place and make a reservation, okay?" She sealed their deal with a quick kiss, glanced off the corner of Delphine's lips, and turned away from her. Delphine held onto her hand until she was too far, and let her arm fall limply back to her side.
She dug out a dress from the back of their closet, changing and getting ready in the bathroom while Cosima did the same in the bedroom. She stared when Delphine emerged, jaw dropped. Delphine felt her cheeks warm. Cosima grinned, then, and held out her arm.
"Shall we?"
It was a place Delphine had never heard of before, let alone been, but it seemed to be the type of venue that Aldous or Rachel would visit on a regular basis, not one that Cosima would enjoy. It reminded Delphine of old movies, with tables around a dance floor and men in suits playing softly on a stage. They were sat just off of the open area, watching a few couples spinning each other lazily across the floor.
"Didn't realize it was an event night," Cosima muttered with a sheepish smile. "Sorry." Delphine laughed airily, and took her hand.
"No, it is quite romantic," she reassured, squeezing Cosima's fingers gently.
"Yeah?" the brunette asked. Her smile crinkled her eyes.
"Yeah," Delphine replied. Cosima's eyes shown.
"Good," she said, pulling out Delphine's seat for her before settling in her own. "You know, I think we could probably count this as our first real date."
"Oh?" Delphine asked as she spread her napkin across her lap and reached for the wine menu.
"Yeah. I mean, obviously last time was some kind of set up, otherwise Leekie wouldn't have been there, so..." Delphine bit her lip. "Sorry. I'm over it, I swear. What do you want to eat?"
Delphine's head was pleasantly fuzzy from the wine, and it was enough that when Cosima suggested they join the few couples still dancing, she wasn't in the right mind to refuse her.
"I am rather clumsy," she warned, letting Cosima lead her away from the table with the taste of her drink still lingering on her tongue.
"You?" Cosima asked. "Clumsy?"
"Yes," Delphine said through a laugh. Cosima pulled her in, one hand holding hers and the other resting lightly on her hip. "With dancing." Cosima hummed, and stepped closer until their bodies were gently brushing.
"We'll see about that." A few seconds later she winced when Delphine stepped on her toes, and disguised it with a laugh. "Okay," she said. "You're clumsy. But I still want to dance with you." She spun them in a slow circle. It wasn't nearly as impressive as the casual waltzing taking place around them, but it was good enough for them. Delphine dropped her head onto the brunette's shoulder. "Are you tired?" Cosima asked after a while. "Do you want to go home?"
"Yes," Delphine replied, but she wasn't tired. Her body was humming from being so close, but hesitance held her back.
"Okay," Cosima said. "Let me get the check."
On the ride home, Delphine laid her hand against Cosima's thigh, a silent question. Cosima held it in place with her own. She could feel it in the tension swirling in the air. Cosima was practically vibrating under her fingertips. Delphine didn't let go of her hand, keeping their fingers tightly woven on the trip up to the top of the building, even when Cosima had to fumble to find the right key to let them back inside. The door shut, and there was silence. Delphine leaned against it, pulling Cosima closer with a gentle tug. Her chest swelled and tightened with anticipation; or perhaps it was the wine still swimming through her blood. It didn't matter, not when Cosima was so close she could smell traces of her perfume.
Cosima initiated the kiss, with her hand on Delphine's hip and her head tilted back to reach. Delphine sighed and melted against the door, only Cosima's grip on her holding her up. Her hands found Cosima's neck and the line of her jaw and held as the kiss deepened, and then it was Cosima's tongue she could taste wine, instead of her own. She was breathless when they parted, her heart fluttering and her stomach twisting. Cosima's eyes were dark. She pulled, and Delphine followed, through the living room and into the bedroom. Cosima sat her on the edge of the bed and kissed her again, and her breathing was shaky when she turned her head to kiss Delphine's jaw.
"Are you sure?" Delphine asked, as Cosima's hands searched for her dress zipper.
"More sure than I've been of anything in a long time," Cosima replied, the words whispered into her ear. Delphine closed her eyes.
With a resigned sigh, Delphine pushed across the floor to the space she had cleared on the table opposite for her company laptop. She braced her elbow on the edge and chewed lightly on her knuckle. It was a weak hunch, but it was better than nothing, and all she needed was to pull up the related files for it. She was met with words flashing red across her screen. ACCESS DENIED. Delphine frowned, and tried again. Perhaps it was a bug in the system. She'd encountered them before. She tried again, but the same message flashed up. She tried another file. The same.
"Merde," she muttered. "Cosima?"
"Yeah?" the brunette called from the other room.
"I can't read this file. Can you try?"
"Yeah." The scuff of her chair being pushed back echoed into the room, Cosima following it. She bent over Delphine's shoulder, one hand braced against the back of her chair. She hummed in Delphine's ear. She was momentarily engulfed in Cosima's arms as she stretched them out to reach the computer, tapping her fingers quickly against the keys. The file blinked open.
"That's not right," Delphine said. Cosima hesitated.
"Why?"
"You shouldn't be able to get into these; my clearance is higher than yours." She paused, and turned in her chair to look at the brunette. "Isn't it?" Cosima glanced away. "Cosima."
"Don't blame me," she said, and stepped away. "It's not my fault." Delphine frowned.
"Did you know about this?"
"I-uh," she squeezed her eyes shut. "Rachel may have said something about it." Delphine glared at her.
"Cosima, I need to get into these files!" Cosima held her hands up.
"Look, I'll call Rachel and see what I can do, but until then if you need to get into something just ask me and I'll see what I can do about it. Okay?" Delphine pushed away from her desk, forcing Cosima to step to the side to avoid the path of her chair. "Where are you going?"
"Home," Delphine said sharply, replacing her lab coat for her jacket. She jerked it over her shoulders, flustered and frustrated.
"What? Why?" Cosima protested, reaching out to her. Delphine moved out of her reach and snatched her purse up.
"Because I can't be productive if I have to keep coming to you when I need something," she said, and forced a hand through her hair. She shook her head, mumbling to herself, "I'll just go over the test results again."
"Delphine," Cosima tried.
"I'll see you at home," Delphine said, and walked out before Cosima could say anything else.
On her way back to the flat, she fished her mobile out of the depths of her bag and called Sarah. The woman picked up after a few rings, saying Delphine's name with a confused tone, sounding a bit on edge.
"Hi, Sarah," Delphine said.
"Did something happen?" Sarah asked.
"No, I-" She paused and bit her lip. "I just wanted to update you. We haven't found anything yet, and things may be... delayed."
"Delayed? What do you mean delayed?" Delphine sighed.
"My security clearance has been downgraded, but Cosima's has been increased."
"What does that mean, exactly?" Sarah asked. Delphine pressed the elevator call button.
"It means that I will have to go through her until it's been fixed."
"That's bullshit," Sarah said. Delphine could hear her frowning. The elevator dinged. "Tell Cosima to call me, later, yeah?"
"I will," Delphine said. The line was quiet for a moment. Delphine stepped into the elevator.
"How are you holding up?" Sarah asked.
"We're fine," Delphine replied.
"You sure?"
"Yes. It is... difficult. Being back."
"Yeah, well, so long as you don't start playing for the other team."
"I won't," Delphine said firmly. The lift slowed to a stop, and the doors slid open. "You have my word." She heard Sarah sigh.
"Okay. Good. Look, I've gotta go, but don't let Cos forget to call me when she gets back, okay?"
"I will tell her," Delphine replied.
"Cool," Sarah said. "Keep safe."
"You, too." Delphine dropped her phone from her ear with a sigh and switched it for her keys, letting herself into the silence of their flat. It should have been relaxing, but it didn't feel like home. Delphine peered around the walls and ceilings, feeling, knowing somewhere in the back of her mind that their every move was being watched. She rubbed at her eyes, and went to get a glass of wine.
Cosima had hoped she'd never have to visit Rachel's office. It wasn't on the top floor, but it was damn close, and as she stood in the elevator she wondered what Sarah had felt on her way up to meet their resident proclone. The hallway she stepped out into was just as bright and bare as the rest of the building. She glanced at the directions hanging on the wall across from her, and turned left, stopping outside a door labelled with Rachel's name. She inhaled carefully, shook the stress out of her shoulders and arms, and knocked.
"Come in," Rachel called, her voice crisp and clear even through the door. She was at her desk when Cosima entered, tracing a file with her fingertip. She closed it when she glanced up. Her smile was professional, but there was a hint of shock in her eyes. "Cosima. What can I do for you?"
"I wanted to talk," Cosima said, "if you have a minute."
"By all means," Rachel replied, and swept her hand towards the empty chair across from her. Cosima shut the door with a soft click and crossed the room. Rachel watched her the entire way, poised delicately in her chair with her hands folded before her. She looked every part the lioness Cosima knew she was; proud and elegant, but ready to leap at the slightest provocation. Cosima sat, and fought the urge to fidget. "What's bothering you?"
"It's, uh, it's about Delphine, and her clearance."
"I thought we agreed it was for the best."
"I never actually said that. Like, I mean, she needs certain files to help find a cure. Dropping her security level is only going to hurt us." Rachel shrugged lightly.
"We found evidence that she was accessing folders unrelated to her current work," the blonde said. "Files that concerned Kira Manning, actually." Cosima paled. She hoped Rachel didn't notice.
"Maybe she thought it would help. We're related, so, like, she probably thought there was something she could use." Rachel hummed.
"Nevertheless," she said, "we can't have her sniffing about where she doesn't belong." Her voice was curt, almost sharply so.
"Why give me access, then?" Cosima asked. Rachel considered her carefully, and tilted her head to the side.
"I trust in your judgement," she said, then sucked in a breath as if she meant to say something else. Cosima couldn't read what flickered through her gaze. "If you would come around this side, please. I have something I would like you to see." Hesitantly, Cosima stood, and looped around the desk. Rachel tapped on her keyboard, and brought up a series of security camera footage. Another keystroke rotated them, and another zoomed in to the image of a small girl curled up on a sofa next to an older woman, a picture book spread between them both.
"Kira?" Cosima asked, as if the child would be able to hear her through the computer screen. "You-you have her here? It was you who took her?"
"She is safe here," Rachel said calmly, "with her caretaker. In better hands than she ever was with your Sarah." She turned to look at Cosima, her face blank, but her eyes fierce, bordering on threatening. "I'm trusting you with this, Cosima," she said. "Until these... problems with the Prolethians are put to an end, it is safer to keep Kira here with us. After all, it was Helena who caused her accident, was it not?" Cosima straightened abruptly.
"How do you know about that?" she asked.
"You'll find I know a great many things," Rachel replied, and closed the footage. "I must stress your utmost discretion with this matter. I promise you it's for the best." Cosima hesitated, watching Rachel watch her, and after a long moment, nodded slowly. "Good. Was there anything else you were concerned about?"
"No," Cosima said. "That was it." Rachel turned away from her, leaving Cosima staring down at her desk and the back of her head. She was left with no option but to leave, shutting the door behind her.
Delphine was still annoyed when she arrived home, but Cosima could tell it was at Rachel and DYAD, rather than herself, and for that she was grateful, but Rachel's unveiling weighed heavily on her mind. The blonde was nursing a glass of wine, leaning against the kitchen counter with the glass resting against her chin and her eyes on the pot on the stove, slowly simmering. She didn't turn her head until the door shut.
"What's wrong?" she asked. Everything, Cosima thought, rubbing at her eyes beneath her glasses.
"Nothing," she said. "I'm just tired." Delphine's shoulders relaxed, and she opened an arm, inviting. Cosima crossed to her and stepped into her embrace, pressing her face against the other woman's neck. She inhaled the faint, sweet scent of perfume that still clung to her skin.
"I'm sorry," Delphine said, and kissed the top of her head.
"Yeah," Cosima replied. "Me, too."
She stayed late, much to Delphine's chagrin, but she couldn't bear to go home with the secret of Kira's whereabouts so closely kept to her chest, pressing down on her shoulders like lead. Besides, there was work to be done. Her cover would only hold if she kept it strong, and it benefited her as well, thankfully, a blessing Cosima hadn't expected to be given. The light from the computer was hurting her eyes. Cosima lightly dropped her glasses to the desk and rubbed at them with her knuckles, stifling a yawn with her palm. A rapping at the door startled her; sharp, quick and light. Cosima jumped at the sound. Her voice was too breathy when she called out for them to enter. She placed her glasses back on her nose and blinked as her vision focused.
"Uh, hi. What are you doing here?"
"I saw the light on," Rachel said as she stepped inside. "Thought I would come and investigate." She sauntered slowly about the room, pausing by the table. "Any more breakthroughs, Dr. Niehaus?" Cosima scoffed lightly, amused.
"I'm not a doctor."
"Yet," Rachel replied casually, ignoring the confused look that passed over Cosima's face. "How is our dear doctor, by the way?" Cosima shrugged.
"Still angry. Home life isn't exactly, well, 'homey' at the moment."
"Is that so? I'm sorry to have placed you under such duress." Her hips swayed as she made her way to the desk, trailing her fingers along its edge. "I have a proposition for you, Cosima," Rachel continued. "A way to assist you with your research. Your last report said you've been struggling." Cosima watched carefully as Rachel slowly began to stride around the desk.
"Yeah," she confirmed. "What did you have in mind?" Rachel's fingers paused on the edge of her desk, then continued as she rounded the corner, drawing closer and closer to Cosima's chair.
"Me," Rachel answered simply. Cosima choked on her breath.
"What?" Rachel was behind her. Cosima could feel the pressure of her fingertips pushing into the back of her seat. Her breath was warm against Cosima's ear.
"She wouldn't have to know," she purred. "Besides, it's more like touching yourself than anything else."
"I, uh," Cosima stammered. Rachel braced her weight on the back of her chair, spinning it easily and turning Cosima to face her. She plucked the pen out of her hand and tossed it aside. She leaned in, one hand gripping the back of the seat and the other squeezing around one of its arms.
"For science, of course," she said in a low voice.
"Right," Cosima muttered, sceptical and wary, but she couldn't help the trembling of her voice and her body. "Science."
"Aren't you interested in your own biology? You have the perfect research subject right at your fingertips." Cosima's jaw dropped.
"It's uh, it's a bit more complex than that," she managed, her words tight in her throat. Rachel's hum blended seamlessly into her response.
"It doesn't have to be; not tonight." Cosima leaned back as far as she could. Rachel was too close, the scent of her perfume heady and thick and almost overpowering. She cleared her throat, and looked away.
"What's the catch?" she asked.
"No catch," Rachel replied. "Just an offer. A chance to broaden your knowledge."
"I... can't," Cosima said. Rachel tilted her head, the smallest of smiles twitching at her lips, and straightened up.
"Well, then. At least allow me to treat you to dinner. You've been working hard. You deserve a break." Cosima frowned up at her. She should refuse, but it wasn't like anything better awaited her at home, not with Delphine's almost constant state of frustration.
"Okay," she said, and Rachel stepped back to allow her to stand.
Rachel spared no expense. She dined with the ease of one accustomed to fine living, sipping at expensive wine as she gazed at Cosima over the lip of her glass. The prices on the menu made Cosima nearly spit her own onto the table, barely managing to swallow in time to prevent it. Her antics earned a chuckle from Rachel.
"Please," she said, her menu already folded neatly at her elbow. "It's hardly a dent in my accounts." The wine helped, and Rachel's firm professionalism even more. There was no sign of the sultry beast that had cornered Cosima before, simply the cold, hard façade that Cosima wasn't entirely sure was actually hiding anything. Rachel carefully placed her glass on the table. "So, how do you find DYAD now, Cosima? You've been with us long enough to have formed an opinion, yes?" Cosima hesitated.
"It's impressive," she said, and it was the truth. Rachel tilted her head.
"Indeed," she replied. Cosima thanked the waiter who brought them their food and stared down at her plate. It was a small portion for a pretty penny. "It's worth what it costs," Rachel said, as if reading her mind. "Trust me. You'll be full after dessert." Cosima laughed softly.
"I'm curious," she started. Rachel hummed questioningly, delicately sliding her fork between her teeth. "Do you do anything for fun, or are you a tried and true workaholic?"
"I'm sorry?" Rachel asked, looking confused.
"You know. Fun. With friends. Hobbies. Stuff like that." Rachel's head cocked.
"I.. read," she said carefully.
"Yeah?" Cosima pressed. "What kind of stuff?"
"Anything, really. I can appreciate good food as well."
"You know," Cosima said, "there's this great diner that Delphine and I found. You and I should go, and I can teach to to appreciate the diner things in life." Rachel's reaction was delayed, but then a laugh spilled from her lips, and its genuine sound caught Cosima off guard. She smiled, pressing her tongue against her teeth.
"That was very good," she said, sipping at her wine. "Clever."
"I try," Cosima replied, and Rachel chuckled again.
The drink had made her mind hazy, and her stomach was just as full as Rachel had promised it would be. Cosima set her fork on her empty plate and finished her glass, then leaned back in her chair with a content sigh. Rachel watched her, as always, until she settled, then tipped back her head and let the last of her wine drain from the glass.
"So," she said, her fingers playing at the stem. "Have you given any more thought to my offer?" Maybe it was the wine, or the heavy dessert resting in her stomach, or maybe it was the look in Rachel's eyes, and the way her tongue darted out to lick at her lips.
"Okay," Cosima said. "Sure."
Rachel's flat was how she imagined it. All of life's modern luxuries had found a home, yet they felt like they were hardly, if ever, used. Rachel locked the door behind her and with a look, sauntered towards the back. Cosima followed. When Rachel's lips found hers, she didn't resist. They tasted like wine and chocolate. Familiar hands pushed at her clothes, and a voice whispered in her ear, muttering words in French that Cosima only vaguely recognized. She closed her eyes, and for a moment, just a moment, the guilt buried in her chest faded.
Any traces of it were gone by the time Rachel slid back up her body, smirking and stretching like a cat. Cosima flipped her over with a jerk of her hips and a push of her hand, delighting in the brief look of surprise that flashed across Rachel's face. Her fingers trailed down the blonde's stomach. Rachel's hand tugged at her hair.
"For science," she said, and dipped her hand.