Professor Snape stood in a portrait at the head of the classroom. The first years piled in, and sat in the desks facing him.

"There will be no foolish wand-waving or silly incantations in this class," Snape said. "This lesson will be on grammar. Turn to page 394." Silently, the class opened their books and flipped through the pages. "I can teach you the subtle science and exact art of the English language, unless, of course, you're as big a bunch of dunderheads as I usually have to teach." His eyes swept the classroom – not easy to do from a portrait. "Then again, perhaps some of you have come to Hogwarts in possession of abilities so formidable that you feel confident enough to not pay attention!" The entire class looked around to see who wasn't paying attention. A girl in the second row looked up at him. A girl with long, dark red hair and brilliant green eyes...

"Stand," Snape instructed her. She did so, trembling. When Snape saw the red hair and Gryffindor tie, he snorted. "A Weasley, no doubt."

"No, sir," she said, nervously. "Potter." It was then that Snape noticed her eyes. "Lily Potter." Something deep inside Snape stirred. It was as though he felt something he hadn't felt in a long time. The version of Snape that lived on in the portrait was not as lucky as the real Snape, having parties in heaven with everyone else. Still, she was Harry Potter's daughter, not Lily Evans herself.

"And you believe you can pass this class without paying attention, is that it?" Snape asked.

"No, sir," Lily said. "I was–"

"Silence. Sit down," Snape said. Lily sat, near to tears. Hugo, who was sitting next to her, sharing her table, put his hand on hers and squeezed. She looked up at her cousin, wishing she could thank him properly. "Today, I will be teaching the differences between a few choice words that will stop your professors' heads from exploding, not that that would be a particularly large shame. However, our headmistress has requested it be done. Can anyone tell me the key difference between you're and your? Anyone? Potter?" Snape looked directly at Lily, who looked up at him, too terrified to speak. She shook her head even though she knew the answer. "Pity," Snape spat. "Can you, perhaps, tell me the difference between then and than?" Lily, again, remained silent. "No? How about the function of a comma? The correct use of quotation marks? The precise spelling of the word 'acquaintance'?" Silence. "Is there anything you can tell me? Thought you wouldn't open a book before coming to Hogwarts? 5 points from Gryffindor."

Lily burst into tears, slammed her book closed, picked up her bag, and ran from the classroom. Snape knew he had gone too far.

"Snape's pure evil," Hugo told her later in the common room. "Everyone knows that."

"He was the bravest man Dad ever knew," Albus Severus said, absently. He was trying to write an essay for Professor Macmillan, in Defense Against the Dark Arts. It wasn't difficult – he was an ace at Defense Against the Dark Arts, (and he, at the first week of his third year, could already produce a fully-fledged Patronus) but nonetheless, it required his full attention.

"Just because you're named after a psycho doesn't mean-" Hugo began.

"Bravest man. He ever knew," Albus said, still intent on his essay.

"He made your sister cry," Hugo shot back.

"Would you STOP yelling?" James shouted from across the common room. "I am trying to write this essay!"

"Homework already? It's still the first week of school, mate," Fred II said, rolling his eyes.

"Unless, of course..." Louis began, peering over James's shoulder. "Yes, his summer Potions essay."

"Oh, I'm Louis! I'm a prefect! I do homework the moment it's assigned!" James mocked. "Shut it. Fred and I should disown you just for being a Prefect." Louis took this as a slap in the face and disappeared up to his dormitory.

A/N: I usually don't do this, but I'm writing this for a facebook page that I admin: "We're not stupid - We know we're called Gred and Forge." So, it's shorter than usual, and it has no discernible ending. This will be a lesson on grammar that today's youth (and some older folks as well) so dearly needs, as assigned by myself and Professor Fred of said page.

Love,

Samantha / samlover14 / LilyLunax3