It wasn't like Castiel didn't know the consequences of what he was about to do. Angels and humans do not belong together in such a way. It didn't matter that they were both male; angelic beings didn't care about things like that. But humans are meant to be with humans and angels with their siblings. Things like this are not supposed to happen. What Castiel was about to commit was a sin. A major one.

He told himself that he didn't care about what he was supposed to be; what his brothers and sisters expected of him. His entire life he had only tried to be everything he was told he should be. The perfect warrior. Obedient. Never asking questions. And maybe that's what pushed him away from them. But at the same time that their orders were being thrown at him, pushing him further and further away, there was something else pulling at him. And it started the second he grabbed onto Dean.

Dean.

It was Dean that changed him. That turned him from the mindless, obedient soldier into what he was today. The only problem was that he wasn't sure what he was now. A rebel. A fallen angel. In love? The thought terrified him. Castiel had never felt anything like close to what he felt for Dean. The racing heart. Thinking about ways to impress him. Wondering what he's doing when he's not around. If he's safe. If he's in danger. If Cas should be there.

One thing he did know for sure, however, was that he had to do this. He couldn't stand by for a second longer biting his tongue. Cas wasn't sure if Dean felt the same way. He didn't know if this would ever work out right or how Dean would react. The fear of Dean's reaction was the thing that kept Castiel holding back for so long but he just couldn't anymore. He had to say it.

Castiel is snapped out of his thoughts when he hears the Impala pull into the motel parking lot. Sam was out; doing what Cas was unsure of. Dean had gone to the general store across the street, most likely to buy alcohol and extra rock salt.

Cas felt as if he could use a drink right about now.

But he couldn't. He couldn't lose courage now. Not when he had finally made a decision. Castiel could feel his stomach churn and suddenly he understood what the phrase 'butterflies in your stomach' meant. Goodness. Dean may as well turned him human.

The knob to the hotel room turned and Dean came in, carrying two bags of groceries. He tossed the keys on the table and turned to see Cas, sitting on the bed, looking nervous.

"Hey, Cas. What's with the puppy dog eyes?" Dean said with a grin. He still believed himself to be humorous.

Cas opened his mouth to speak but the words just wouldn't come. It was as if a fist had just clenched on his throat.

Dean took out a pack of beer from one of the bags and looked up at Cas.

"Cas?" he asked. Cas just looked at him. Why couldn't he speak? "Cas? What's going on?"

It was another few seconds before Cas blurted out, completely ungracefully and a little bit slurred, "I love you."

Dean froze and stared. "What?"

Cas swallowed. Now that the knot in his throat had gone, he almost missed it. It would've given him a proper reason not to answer.

"Cas, what did you just say?" Dean said. Cas's blue eyes looked into Dean's green ones.

"I love you," Cas paused.

"I love you, Dean."